Blum on Bridge Tales from the World of Bridge
	I thought it would be fun to begin the year with an Auld Lang Syne or stories out of the past. Several I know to be true, for I was there. Others were related to me from reliable sources. So here goes nothin'. At the 1996 summer North American Bridge Championships in the Newcomer (0-5 points) Pairs, one Unlucky Lady's partner opened the bidding out of turn. The director was called and ruled that in this particular instance he had no choice but to bar the Unlucky Lady from the bidding completely. So eight hands later her partner asked the Unlucky Lady why she had not bid even once on her 19-point hand. Unlucky Lady sadly replied that the director had made it abundantly clear that she was prohibited from bidding at all. I guess it was time to repeal Prohibition. Expert Edgar Kaplan argues both sides on whether to have a four or six person team for a long Knockout match. On the one hand, a six-person team that reaches the finals has players who enjoy some respite in each match. If a pair has performed poorly they can be benched to regroup. On the other hand, a four-person squad is obviously in peak form, each partnership functioning at its prime efficiency. Humorist Phil Brady shared his wisdom concerning this perennial conundrum: "Always play on a four-person team. If you ever sit out, how can your team possibly win without you? And if they can, you certainly don't want them to find out." The Encyclopedia of Bridge covers most of the routine two-way finesse combinations. However, I don't believe it offers an opinion as to the best way to play these two hands: Dummy holds AQJ2 of hearts. Declarer holds the A109543 of the same suit. Director Jeff Alexander swears the story is true, so it must be. Declarer, hoping to escape with no heart losers, played low to the jack, which held the trick. Declarer then realized that dummy's heart ace was actually the diamond ace and restored it to its proper place. A second heart to declarer's ace dropped the king offside. Bridge is such an easy game. Director Jeff, acting in the course of equity, removed the extra trick. Declarer felt aggrieved but did not appeal. If you play in a NABC in Washington, D.C., at the usual site of the tournament, nearby is the "Culbertson Roofing Company." I'm a D.C. native. About 30 years ago I played regularly in a Tuesday evening game at Indian Springs Country Club. Two incidents I shall never forget. One evening two lady novices, both club members, were bidding a hand. Suddenly one lady loudly called, "DIRECTOR." Jerry Machlin, my all-time favorite arbiter, approached the table preparing to espouse his bountiful knowledge of the Laws of Contract Bridge, whereupon the lady, expressionless, said, "Get me a cup of coffee." Jerry was so taken aback that he did. Two of the best players in the D.C. area are Frank King and Jim Wood. Once a month they played at Indian Springs because it was extra-masterpoint night. This particular evening my partner and I had the bad luck to play against them the first round. We were handed two zeros on both boards we played. From then on we had a fantastic game until the final round, when to our amazement Frank and Jim came to our table. We called the director, Bernie Arret, who was substituting for the game. It turns out that Bernie had botched the movement and the only way the situation could be solved was that we play a "revenge" round against our former adversaries. You guessed it. We got another "00." When I occasionally run into Frank at a regional he always gives me a look that says, "remember when.....!" Dick Budd's regular partner is Dave Beers. At a Canadian regional they ran into Mark Molson and asked him to play in an upcoming New England regional. Budd asked Molson to find a partner that would appropriate for this particular team. Molson called Budd about a week later and said he had found a partner, Bernie Miller. So that was their team - BUDD, MOLSON, MILLER, and, of course, BEERS. Finally we all must remember "To err is human. To forgive, divine." Aileen Osofsky, chairman of the Goodwill Committee at a Miami NABC put it best when she said, "People make mistakes. Rarely are they intentional, but often they are treated as such. One of the nicer aspects of this tournament has been the lack of attention-drawing partnership arguments. That MUST mean that people are demonstrating a greater understanding of their partner's mistakes, those of the opponents and the rare occasion when they make mistakes themselves. Treat mistakes as learning devices and as occasional excuses to limber up the laughing muscles. They are important only until the next board."