Part Two
London 1789
Archie gave a little sigh of
relief as he slipped through the door to the library, letting it close
softly behind him. With heavy velvet draperies drawn across the
deep-silled windows, the room was dark and silent, in spite of the fact
that it was still only afternoon on a bright day in early summer. Among
the guests much had been made of the beautiful weather, the brightness
of the sun, the warmth of the day, the splendor of the townhouse
gardens, blooming at their peak. All elements had conspired, it was
agreed, to contribute to a perfect wedding day for his eldest sister,
Alice, and the Earl of Langford.
The dark was oddly comforting to
him, and the silence, he realized, so very unaccustomed. Solitude was
rare to nonexistent aboard Justinian, crammed as she was with humanity,
and indeed, it was never really a thing to be sought, no matter to what
degree one might long for it. When not on watch, one would seek the
company of as many fellows as possible, and even then…
But even if he was unused to being
alone, at times it seemed that loneliness was indeed his closest
friend, and this occasion was no exception. He was surrounded by
family—father, sisters, brothers---and yet there seemed to be no time
to speak to anyone beyond polite greetings and superficial niceties,
and an awkward fourteen-year-old, fresh off the ship was, in any case,
a little on the periphery at such a grand society affair. Not that he
should have known how to begin a meaningful conversation with any of
his siblings, let alone his father, had the opportunity presented
itself. They were all such strangers now, scattered to the four winds
since his Mama had died when he was six---the girls to live with their
Aunt Cecilia in Town, his brothers to school, and to the Army, and he,
at just twelve, to the Navy. They had all come together over the years
only on rare, and usually formal occasions, and Archie believed he
could count the times he could remember on the fingers of one hand and
still have digits to spare.
His memory had served him
reliably, too, as to the personalities of his two elder brothers. Still
fractious and full of themselves, as the afternoon had worn on they had
been getting proportionately drunk and quarrelsome, and he had thought
it prudent to absent himself from their company whilst they were still
preoccupied with abusing each other, and not casting about for fresh
game!
He'd found the library, he
fancied, almost purely by chance. He felt he hardly knew this house; it
seemed he had spent so little time here growing up. Whenever the
household was in London he had forever been running off, as young as he
was, to haunt the playhouses in Drury Lane. It had never really
occurred to him before that it was in anyway odd that no one had every
really seemed to notice or to care.
It seemed a good room, he decided,
as his eyes adjusted to the dim light. Not large, but square and
symmetrical in proportion, with shelves lining all the walls but the
chimney front, and reaching from the floor all the way to the high,
coffered ceiling. It smelled a little dusty and disused, but as he
approached the nearest shelf and put out a hand to touch the first
volume he had to smile; the smell of the old leather bindings seemed,
almost more than anything else he could think of, to make him feel at
home.
Gently he eased the heavy book
from the shelf, squinting to see the title embossed in tiny gold
lettering on the spine. "The Compleat Works of John Webster, Being Two
Tragedies and Eight Other Plays". Archie wrinkled his nose. No.
Especially not after an afternoon spent in the company of Malcolm and
Duncan. Next in the line proved to be a volume of Shakespeare.
Hm. With the uncommon luxury of an entire collection at his disposal,
mightn't he try to find something he did not already know by heart?
As he went to replace the second
book, he found he had some difficulty and discovered, upon
investigation, that a slim volume, which had apparently been laid
across the tops of the other two, had dropped into the space. Flimsy,
bound in plain red leather with no backing and no printing on its
cover, he drew it out, returned the Shakespeare, and walked to the
window to see what he had.
With one hand he drew back the
heavy drapery a little, and the book in his other hand fell open at
random. He glanced at the page that began:
"With this
stripling, all whose art of love was the action of it, I could, without
check of awe or restraint, give loose to joy, and execute every scheme
of dalliance my fond fancy might put me on, in which he was, in every
sense, a most exquisite companion. And now my great pleasure lay in
humouring all the petulances, all the wanton frolic of a raw novice
just fleshed, and keen on the burning scent of his game, but unbroken
to the sport: and to carry on the figure, who could better THREAD THE
WOOD than he, or stand fairer for THE HEART OF THE HUNT?"
Archie certainly did not recognize
that passage, or indeed the style of prose, which to his mind was more
than a little over-extravagant. And what did he or she mean by
"threading the wood"? And this book belonged to his father? It must be
one of those dreadful ladies' novels that Alice and Margaret used to
titter over. Barely interested, he turned to the frontispiece, and was
enlightened:
"Fanny Hill, Or, The Harlot's
Progress: Memoirs of a Woman Of Pleasure" by John Cleland."
Oh.
He did know of it. In fact, it was
rather an old book. Hether owned a copy (and others of the same sort)
that had made round after round of the oldster's berth, but Archie,
being the youngest in the mess, had never quite gotten his hands on it,
and as it was, was fairly mystified by passages read aloud that seemed
to have the effect of sending his mates into fits of laughter
interspersed with groaning despair. He could only ken that it was meant
to be titillating stuff, and that it had to do with the natural
relations between men and women, a topic in which he had been, he knew,
most unreliably educated thus far.
Mildly curious, he separated the
drapery still further and clambered up onto the deep windowsill that
provided a wide, sunny seat. With his back against the window frame,
and his knees drawn up, he made himself quite comfortable. He didn't
suppose he much cared where he began, so he let the book fall open
again at random, and found his heroine still engaged--or rather about
to be engaged---with the same young rustic.
"---my young
Sportsman, emboldened by every freedom he could wish, wantonly takes my
hand and carries it to that enormous machine of his, that stood with a
stiffness! a hardness! an upward bent of erection! and which, together
with its bottom dependence, the inestimable bulge of lady's
jewels, formed a grand show out of good indeed! Then its dimensions,
mocking either grasp or span, almost renewed my terrors, for I could
not conceive how, or by what means I could take, or put such a bulk out
of sight! I stroked it gently, on which the mutinous rogue seemed to
swell, and gather a new degree of fierceness and insolence; so that
finding it grew not to be trifled with any longer, I prepared myself in
good earnest!"
Archie frowned and held up his
hand, forming an "o" between thumb and fingers. His hands were small,
admittedly, but try as he might, he could not quite believe in the
lady's accounting of her young man's endowments. In living for two
years on a ship in the company of nothing by men and boys, one saw a
few things---quite a variety of things, in fact---but this, he
concluded, was surely a bit of an exaggeration. He read on:
"Slipping then
a pillow under me, that I might give him the fairest play, I guided
officiously with my hand this furious battering ram, whose ruby head,
presenting nearest the resemblance of a heart, I applied to its proper
mark. He was at the mouth of the indraught, and driving foreright, the
powerfully divided lips of that pleasure thirsty channel received him."
He read, unable to deny a certain
fascination and curiosity, but becoming a little aware, at the same
time, of an uneasy confusion within him. There were things he was
reluctant to let come into his mind, feelings he did not wish to
acknowledge that were at war with what he knew, from the overheard
conversations of his shipmates, was the perfectly normal curiosity of
his age and sex. This "Fanny" used such terms---of "terrors", of
violent action, that suggested a kind of menace associated with
masculinity, of a force big and fierce and overpowering. And yet of
pain, or true fear she said nothing. Indeed, to submit to this
treatment seemed to be what she desired above all things and she
described what she felt as "sweet
agony, the melting moment of dissolution, when pleasure dies by
pleasure."
It all seemed so contradictory,
and yet even he could understand that there must be some reason why it
was called "the act of love". It was the thing, this desire, this
pleasure, that inspired the greater part of poetry, after all. It was
one of the reasons people married. His mother and father, and now his
sister. He could not imagine…
He could only imagine that this
was meant to be the way of things. The other, the thing of which he
would not allow himself to think, had nothing to do with pleasure, or
with love. That he understood, and that was why he must try, must
fight, to keep it separate, apart from the rest of him forever.
****
Archie let the book fall shut on
his knee, and turned his head to look out the window. From high on the
second story of the house, behind tiny panes of squiggly leaded glass,
he imagined he was well concealed from view. Below him, drenched in
brilliant sun, the garden was alive with color. Deep banks of roses
were already lining the edges of the lawn and still more climbed the
high, white stone walls; fruit trees blossomed, and the beds of the
formal plantings, divided by pathways, and laid out in elegant
parterres, were bursting with flowers, herbs and greenery.
He remembered so little, but he
remembered that his mama had loved her roses.
The party appeared to be in full
swing still, and the pretty, pale silks and muslins of the ladies'
frocks, the canaries and blues and greens and reds of the gentlemen's
finery only added to the bouquet, creating an abstraction of motion and
color through the glass. Looking down, he did not believe he could pick
out a single person that he knew.
There was a sound in the room, the
sudden and somewhat violent opening and subsequent slamming of the
door, and he turned to look, although he could see nothing, hidden as
he was behind the thick drapery. There was an active rustling of silk,
quick steps, a woman's gasp. Through the thinnest sliver of an opening
in the curtains he glimpsed a whisper of pale green gown, a man's arms
encircling a slender back.
"Come here," the man's voice was
cool and smooth. "Don't you dare run away from me."
The woman's voice was muffled, the
man's arms enveloping her. Almost immediately Archie came to the
conclusion that if he did not make his presence known, he might well be
about to bear witness to the very act of which he so recently had been
reading!
"No! Let go of me, Philip!"
Oh, perhaps not. A lover's
quarrel, then? He should announce himself, certainly, but how, without
startling the pair rudely in the midst of their argument and causing
everyone embarrassment?
More noises, more rustling, hectic
motion, and then the sound of tearing fabric, an anguished, "Oh!" and
something heavy crashed to the floor. Archie got quietly to his knees
and peered through the opening, holding his breath. A small mahoghany
side table had overturned and the delicate Chinese porcelain cachepot
which had been its ornament lay shattered on the parquet.
"Now see what you have done," the
man's voice was calm. "And torn your gown as well. Ah, well, I trust
t'was not my money that paid for it? Whose, then? As if I could not
guess."
"Stop, Phillip!" the lady's voice
was tremulous. "You don't know what you're talking about and you are
drunk. Let us just go, please!"
"Oh, we shall, we shall, my love,"
the man said. "Right away. In truth, I cannot wait to get you home."
Archie dared not to breathe.
Perhaps it was best for him simply to wait until they had gone, and let
no one be the wiser. He got as close as he could to the opening in the
curtain, trying to see. The woman was standing back to him. She was
tallish, but slightly built, and the expanse of skin that showed above
the back of her gown was milky white. Her neck was long and slender,
her hair, thick and abundant and red as flame.
The man raised his hand towards
her, and she turned her face a little to the side, quickly, as if she
anticipated a blow. Archie recognized her. Georgiana Edgeworth was a
family friend, the daughter of an Irish baron who had been his father's
fellow at Oxford, and his wife, a distant cousin on Archie's mother's
side. "George" was a year or two older than Alice, and the two were
friends, George even having shared the schoolroom at Kennedy Manor with
Alice and Margaret for a year while her parents traveled abroad. She
had married, a good deal younger than Alice, a premier Irish peer,
considered exceptional among that generally impoverished company, it
was thought, for both his wealth and the antiquity of his title. Was
this man her husband, the Earl of Trim?
The man did not strike Georgiana;
he merely placed has hand on her neck and drew her slowly towards him.
The hand looked huge and dark against the whiteness and delicacy of her
neck, and Archie thought he could see the fingers digging into the
softness of her flesh. The man was tall, darkly handsome. Archie could
not see his eyes.
"We will go home, sweet Georgy, my
dear little wife," he whispered lowly. "It has been so long. And to
think that I might have for the taking that which so many others have
paid good coin to obtain! I must say, I admire l'effronterie with which you set
your price! Indeed, it is the first rule of commerce, is it not? Never
to sell oneself short?"
She twisted away from him. "You
are mad, Phillip, I have told you---Frederick is one of my oldest
friends! He lent me money to cover my debts because he knew I was
afraid of you! I never meant for you to know---"
"And you have so many kind old
friends, don't you Georgy?" he said coolly, advancing on her once more
and taking her by the arms. "Always with money to gamble, no matter how
I might encourage you in matters of economy!"
"Oh, let go! You are hurting me!"
she cried, and Archie swallowed hard. What must he do? He should try to
stop this, but he felt paralyzed, rooted to the spot.
"I, hurting you? My dear, I think
you do not begin to know. But you shall. And so will your lover. Before
breakfast tomorrow, on Hounslow Heath."
"He is *not* my lover! And I
cannot believe that Frederick would ever answer a challenge made by
you!" Georgiana spat angrily, while at the same time pulling away from
him, looking, again, as if she expected to be struck.
"No indeed, and he did not
answer," Trim replied. "In point of fact, it will be his friends who
wait on me and mine tomorrow. What a scene he made, my dear! Langford
did try to intervene, but I am afraid everyone knows everything now.
Such a scandal. I fear the victor will next have to fight Julian, to
answer for spoiling his so-perfect nuptials. And you, my love…your
reputation is completely forfeit, I fear."
"How I hate you!" Georgiana said,
her voice beginning to sound thick, as if choking back tears." I hope
to God he kills you!"
The Earl laughed, and his white
teeth flashed in the darkness of the room. "Oh, my dear girl, I think
you had better hope so."
Archie sat in the window long
after they had gone. He felt cold, and there was a knot in his belly
that felt as heavy as a ball of lead. He was ashamed that he had only
sat and watched. To the very depth of his soul he knew what he had
seen. He recognized the menace behind the expression on that smooth,
handsome face. He knew the very timbre of that cool, dangerous voice,
and he understood, with every fiber of his being, the fear---and the
defiance---in Georgiana's heart.
Go
to Part Three