Comic Reviews

by Z.H.

Strangers In Paradise: This is a tough one. Let me explain the premise of the book and you'll understand. Two women, living together (Katchoo & Francine). Katchoo is in love with Francine. Francine is frantically trying to get her life together in a typical 9 to 5 fashion. Katcho has had an, um, troubled life. Francine loves Katchoo, but not in that way. At least she doesn't think so. Katchoo stole several hundred thousand dollars from, how shall we say. . . bad guys. The bad guys didn't take it so well. Add David, who loves Katcho and there you have Strangers In Paradise.

Now, let me get this out of the way, it's brilliant. It's real, it's funny, it's touching, it's dramatic, it's .. . you get the point. It's really, really freaking good! "How can this be?" You cry. "There are no superheroes! No half naked, gun-totin' chicks! No X-Men!" You're right, you won't find any of those things in SIP. Just plain old genius, with a touch of class and a whooooole lot of integrity.

Writing: (Terry Moore) : A Art: (Terry Moore) B + Collectability: Who cares? This one's too good to buy for collecting. Buy it to read.

Preacher: There's some good stuff here and then there's some bad stuff. Oh, yeah, there's also some really, really good stuff. What happens if an Angel and a Demon fall in love and have sex? What happens if the baby of said relationship is a Being with powers who could rival God if it inhabited a mortal body? What happens if the Being escaped the confines of heaven and inhabits Reverend Jesse Custer? I'll tell you what happens. God quits.

You heard it right. God quits heaven. Jesse Custer, his girlfriend (ok, he's not your typical priest) and Cassidy (a Vampire, ok, it's not your typical world) find out about God quitting. Jesse thinks that's pretty much horseshit. He decides to find God and tell him a thing or two about responsibility, or something like that.

Sometimes the writing is so good it hurts. Sometimes the mindless, graphic violence and gore mangle all aspects of good writing. Then again, sometimes they don't.

Writing: B (Garth Ennis) Art: B (Steve Dillion) Collectability: B + But dropping. The first issue goes for fifty bucks or so and don't even look for # 12.

Astro City: Welcome to Astro City. Here's something you're more familiar with. Well, kinda. It's not a world you will be familiar with and you won't recognize any of the people in the book. It's a fresh new look at an old and tired genre, a world plagued by super powered beings. This time, we have real life. This time, we have real people under the masks.

Take for example Samaritan. For generic purposes he's a Superman like figure. The first issue is dedicated to him finding blessed sleep. For him it's blessed. You see, with super hearing like his he hears people in danger 24 hours a day. He never gets to rest, ever. He rushes out of award ceremonies in his honor three or four times to save lives, he has a computer do his writing for his secret identity. He never wastes time sitting around doing nothing. He's a tortured soul unable to have a life because all he knows is Samaritan. So it's pure heaven for him to sleep for a few hours, even though he knows the lives he could be saving if he was awake. The lives that end because Samaritan is dreaming.

The book never deals long with one character. It's a story about the City; everyone in it and dependant on it. You won't find one character in Astro City that's not alive. It will make you believe.

You are now leaving Astro City.

Writing: (Kurt Busiek) A Art: B (Brent E. Anderson & Will Blyberg) Cover Paintings: A + (Alex Ross) Collectability: C + The first series (#'s 1-6) cost a ten spot each.

Essential Vertigo: This is not actually a title of a book. Essential Vertigo reprints old comics that were just too damn good to end. The two you need to pay close attention to are as follows:

Sandman: It just doesn't get any better than this. No one in comic history has so effortlessly blended the comic genre with so many complex characters and story arcs as well as Sandman. Neil Gaiman came in and kicked serious writing ass in the comic industry. Authors are still recovering from his onslaught and are often caught wandering the streets of New York muttering, "So beautiful. The words were so beautiful."

It's the story of Dream of the Endless. Sometimes called Morpheus. Brother to Death, Destiny, Desire, Destruction, Delirium & Despair. That's all I can tell you. Stephen King said it best about the Sandman series when he said this, "Can I say anything new about the Sandman, Death's dark brother, at this point, or add to the cartography of his legend? Doubt it, Constant Reader. Doubt it very much."

What's that mean? I could explain it in simple words but I'll let Steve (that's right, Steve and I are on a first name basis) sum in up for me. " These are great stories, and we're all lucky to have them. To read now, and maybe again . . . to take us away to worlds that never existed, in the company of people we wish we were . . . or thank God we aren't."

Writing (Neil Gaiman) A + Art (Various artist's) ranging from C - A Collectablity: All Vertigo reprints F; original printings: A If sold, the first ten issues could pay your rent for a month.

Swamp Thing: I know, I know. Yes I am talking about that plant creature that crawled out of the swamp in a cheesy 1980's movie. HEY! I warned you about that! I told you all the stuff I was reviewing her was for adults AND it was great stuff. Don't doubt me again.

Now that that's settled I'll continue. High-powered, thought provoking stuff. Wow, this book is so complex it's hard to explain. Hmmm, for once, just take my advice and read it.

Writing (Alan Moore) : A - Art: (Steve Bissette & John Totleben) B + Collectability: Vertigo reprints F; Original printings: C - Hey not all great stories are worth money you know!

Johnny the Homicidal Maniac: At first it's funny. Then it's disgusting. Then it's weird. Then it's funny. Then it's over melodramatic. Then it's funny. Then it's depressing. Then it's funny. Then it's over. That's just the first issue.

You can see this one is different from all the rest. It's not sane so this review shouldn't be sane either. I've never seen an author who wanted to go to Hell more than Jhonen Vasquez (writer). He manages to offend, disgust, revolt & repel every race, creed & species on the planet on just the first page. Well, maybe the second.

Johnny is not a nice guy. In fact he's pretty fucking not nice (hence the title of the book). He slaughters, maims, tortures, defiles, gores, mutilates and kills with the best (worst?) of them. Of course, he's also capable of page long soliloquy in between blood fests for all his literate readers. Um, that would mean he has some illiterate fans wouldn't it? Well, he probably does. They flick through the pages saying, "Hey, he just cut that dudes neck, pulled out his tongue and wrapped it around that other chicks arm. Now he's doing some stupid talking. Oh, now he blew her up with dynamite. This stuff's cool."

I could see it. I really could. So why should you read it? Well, maybe you shouldn't (If you're a cake eating, Mr. Rogers watching, Barney loving pansy!!!). Maybe parents should find the author and plaster Mr. Yuck stickers to his forehead. Maybe, just maybe he's the antichrist. But I doubt it. The antichrist would be much taller.

So why do I like this book so much? Did you ever see the Star Trek Next Gen episode where Data is trying to teach himself to sneeze? Someone walks in while he's doing this (I think it's Wesly) and asks what the hell he's doing. Trying to be more human of course, by sneezing really pathetically.

That's kinda what Johnny is to me. Data snot. You see Data doesn't have any snot but he still tries to sneeze. JTHM doesn't have many redeeming qualities but it still tries to be redeeming because it's so damn funny. Yes, yes the humor is laced really pathetically with gallons (and gallons, and gallons, etc) of blood. Get over it. The redeeming qualities in Johnny are simple. Jhonen Vasquez is having such a marvelous time writing and drawing this beautiful filth you can't help but love it as well.

That is unless you're to busy throwing up. Then you might not think it's so hot.

Writing: (Jhonen Vasquez, if there's a message in his writing, I don't care) B Art: (Jhonen Vasquez) A - Cover paintings: A Collectability: B - First printings are getting scarce and a # 1 would go for around $50.

Johnny