Sample Marked Up Page #2
Sample Marked Up Page #2
Don't worry: I rarely go so "to town" on a client's script and aggressively cut out lines and such ... unless they really want me to.
But this is indicative on the kind of process I'll use on your script, however, instead of striking out lines of dialogue like this, I'll highlight them and say they're not necessary, plus suggest dialogue that will help clarify matters and write comments indicating whether or not a section is particularly good or needs help. The handwritten sentence in the lower left corner that starts out,The idea of this is good... is very typical of what I'll write on a script. I'm telling you what works but also asking if everything there is needed to convey what you want. I prefer to do that rather directly than make the cuts myself. This is your script to write; I'm here to help you find the areas that need improvement and make some suggestions. And yes, if I'm writing comments for other people other than myself, I write much more legibly! P. S. -- Notice that the header up at the top calls this a Pre-First Draft. I knew this was going to be a very raw first draft and I'd clean it up before I let anyone see it, so that's what I called it.
