As the Dalai Lama says – we are  all “fortunate human beings” – to be born with the faculties we have for knowing our realities as we do. But who’s to say it’s any better than a mighty Redwood, observing from it’s home the changes of the world for centuries – maintaining, being constant in a way we never can be. Or the rocks, the mountains, the great mother ocean. We can only know these things if we allow ourselves to relax into them. We can know what it is to be a part of all this if we let ourselves. I have seen this, I tell you it is true. But why should you believe me? Check it out for yourself. One can only know these mysteries by Experience.. Conceal the Mysteries, Reveal them constantly. Such irony. Such arrogance to think we can know what’s true for another. We each share a world, yet we live in our own.

Divine paradox. I love it…

Many call this place the plane of duality, where suffering is unavoidable because of the ever constant loss that is the nature of our world. People talk about Yin and Yang - the receptive and the creative. They see the circle of white and black and call it the Yin/Yang symbol - and the description automatically splits it in half. . But I call it the symbol of the Tao – the complimentary and companionable energies United in the eternal dance of creative and destructive energy. A little white spot in the dark side, a little dark in the light. Such a perfect description, and the symbol goes straight into the subconscious and we Know what it signifies, but then we let our duality focused minds define it and we slip back into the split. One cannot exist without the other. So why sweat the small shit huh? It all comes out in the wash, the wash of the attachments we learn over our lives, which we must work so hard, or so easy, to let go of. Hopes can hold you in a place of suffering as much as anything, as much as your fears - maybe more so sometimes cause we tend to think of Hope as a Positive emotion and strive for that in our happy-face culture. What tripe... . And then there's Desire and Passion... and some say those are traps too. Mebbe so... But  who would ever want to live without Passion and Desire??!! I speak as a Scorpio I know – and we cannot live without those - some say they define us, but it's only a part of our complexity. Our emotions rule our lives and I wouldn’t ever wish that to be otherwise. It’s when the changes takes the passion away – when I can only sit in the apathy that overcomes me when I lose that lifeline to Spirit. It’s hardly worth going on when that happens - a classic hypomanic statement I've found. I can only look out and see the ongoing movement of continuing Life all around me. Seeing the Spirit of Life flowing thru things even when I can't feel it in Me has kept me alive many times. I’m fortunate to have always been intimately connected with the Natural world. it’s my Temple, my Church, my Holy of Holies. I can’t deny Life is continually demanding to become itself. I am a part of all this as are we all. So I lose it, but it always comes back, and then always leaves, and comes back, then leaves again, and then...…

have I made my point?

So I try to create what beauty I can in the bit of the world I can control. Stable in my instability (my bipolar reality) as my psychiatrist says... cute huh... I wonder if it'll always be like this for me. Maybe so, maybe not. I tend to be something of a perfectionist, so I'm trying to learn when something is "good enough". Not meaning not together, not "good" - just stop before I drive myself batty - so easy to do - Good Enough. Let it Go, Steve.. Give it Time... constant mantras for me. I make my home as much a place of solace and ease as I can. Making it Easy and restful, for whatever time I may need. Works pretty well most of the time. Just turn off the phone, don’t check my email or answer the doorbell. Dance to some soulful music, read a book that takes me away to another world, watch a movie - tv has kept me alive a lot too... strange for someone like me - but hey - I'm still here so I figure it's cool. Now and then I try to eat something yummy. And decorate!, decorate!, decorate!, especially trying my best to look delicious and yummy myself, to delight and enlighten my fellow faes and the world all around me. I have a note on my door that I see each time I leave – it says “Are you Visibly Queer today?"  What’s that mean? I could never define it - well I could actually but I'm not gonna try right now -  I Know deep in my soul what it is, and if this is you too you know it too don’t you… . I try to manifest my queer self in whatever ways are up for me each time I go out, trying always to

Dance in Radical Faerie Love!!! What else is there??

And, being in Love's Embrace,  we can let go and

Know we are OK.