Disclaimer: I don't own them
Spoilers: Slight for what might have happened in Birthday
Angel and his son remember "mommy"
Note: Angel shanshued around the time of his son's first birthday.
Angel smiled at his son. He was growing up so fast. He had just turned 10 that day. The party had been huge and for once,
Angel was able to put the sadness in the back of his mind. He gently tucked his son in for the night and kissed his forehead.
"Happy birthday, did you have a good time?"
"It was fun. Dad? Can you tell me about Mom?"
"What would you like to know?"
"Can you just tell me about how you met her and what she looked like, and what she was like?"
"Your mother was very special. I loved her very much and I'm sure she would be so proud of you if she were still with us."
"I miss her."
"I do to. I first met her in Sunnydale...."
"Where uncle Spike is from?"
"Yes, where Uncle Spike is from. I always admired her way of just saying whatever was on her mind. She was very straightforward.
And beautiful. Your mother was always a beautiful woman."
"I remember how she used to smile and how she was always patient with me."
"She loved you very much. Never forget that. She had a hard time in Sunnydale. After that, she came to LA and I saw her
"And you saved her."
Angel laughed. "Yes, I saved her and my life was never the same. She made me smile, she made me laugh, she made me feel
alive again. She even managed to make me wear colors."
"Did you marry her right away?"
"No, we didn't get married until your first birthday. But I remember that when she first saw you, her whole face just lit
up and she immediately took charge of taking care of you. It was then that I realized how much she meant to me."
"Didn't you think she was pretty then?"
"Oh, I always thought she was beautiful, but holding you, she seemed to be the most beautiful woman I had ever seen."
"What did she do with me when I was little?"
"Oh, she would take you shopping, dress you up in little suits, buy you toys that she swore would make you the smartest
kid, and basically loved you. She always made sure that you were asleep before she left for her apartment. She didn't want
to leave you, but she didn't think that it would be wise to stay."
"Well, I was always staring at her. I know it made her uncomfortable, but I couldn't help it. It was soon after that I
proposed. At first she refused to marry me."
"Didn't she want to?"
"She wanted to but, she was scared. She didn't think that I loved her. I had to convince her and show her how much I loved
her before she would even think of accepting my proposal. But it was all worth it in the end."
"Was I in the wedding?"
"You were the best man. And your mother looked radiant in her gown. And I know that it was the happiest day of my life.
When we were pronounced man and wife, I almost cried."
"Did Mom know that you almost cried?"
"Your mother was too busy crying herself. After the wedding, she found out that she probably wouldn't have too much longer
to live, but she managed to give me four more years of beautiful memories."
"I remember how her hair was soft and that she was always smiling."
"She wanted you to remember her smiling. She wanted you to have as many memories with her as she could give you."
"Do I remind you of her at all?"
"Your eyes sparkle like hers. Every time your face lights up, I think of her."
"Did she ever regret me?"
"Never. She lived to see you happy and it made her day to see you smile at her. On your first day of school, she cried
because she never thought she would see you go to school."
"I wish Mom was still with us."
"So do I, but it was her time to go."
"I love you daddy."
"I love you too, now go to sleep."
Angel quietly shut the door and took a deep breath. He missed Cordelia. But at least he had the memories. It made everything
easier. And he knew Cordelia would never have forgiven him if he hadn't gone on after her death. He just wished she could
see how their son had grown and what he had accomplished.