W A C K Y W A R S
May the Farce Be With You
At some time in the past
in a part of space nowhere near here . . . .
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Welcome, fellow Star Wars people!! I love Star Wars and I know you do, too. But just because we
treasure something, it doesn't mean we can't have a little fun with it, right?
Right! So, I've got the funniest Star Wars thing since Hardware Wars. Remember that? No? Well, anyhow,
why don't you try Wacky Wars and see if it doesn't get a
laugh or two out of you.
And before you go, take a look at a really Cool Picture.
This crazy little program selects from a large number of well-known Star Wars characters' names and throws
them together into the most ridiculous situations you'll never see in any Star Wars movie.
The variety of possible results is almost endless!
Program features include:
- The Diminutive Falcon flies across the screen, shooting stuff.
- Save screen contents to disk instantly.
- Toggle sound on/off.
- Animated letters fly together to form multi-colored sentences.
Click to Download Wacky Wars .
Use QBASIC to run the program. Read WHATSUP.DOC.
Trekkers should check out Silly Trek.
And if you like Wheel of Fortune, try my FREE game
Spin 2 Win.
There's also my concentration games Memory Match and
Simon Says.
There are many peculiarities and goofs people have spotted in the Star Wars films. Below I've
listed things that, unless otherwise stated, I noticed myself . . .
A New Hope
- As Leia's ship disappears with the gigantic Star Destroyer blocking the view, Leia's ship is
obviously to high for the laser guns on the SD's underside to hit it, yet they keep firing.
- Luke, Ben and company arrive at Mos Eisley. As the landspeeder passes, it clearly has a funky
double shadow. I know Tatooine has two suns, but nothing else has a double shadow.
- Darth Vader and Tarkin are standing in the Death Star conference room talking and at one point
Vader stops talking, but his hand is gesturing for no reason.
- On the Death Star, Stormtroopers arrive at the room where Artoo and Threepio are hidden. Upon
entry, one trooper bumps his head on the low door. The Empire's best, eh?
(Someone pointed that out to me. I don't know why I never saw it myself.)
- Obi-Wan and Darth begin their lightsaber duel and, during a pause, Alec Guinness aims his sabre toward
the camera and the brightness of the beam disappears, leaving only the tip aglow.
- Luke's talking to Uncle Owen about joining the academy and makes a common Earthling-like
speech error and says "But that's a whole 'nother year" (instead of "a whole other year").
It seems bad English isn't limited to planet Earth.
- In the famous trench scene, the Imperial guns at the end of the trench swivel considerably, even
though only a slight turn would result in the lasers blasting the walls. It should have slid side to side, instead.
- The Death Star has just been destroyed and Luke has returned to the base. A loud group of people surrounds
Luke and Leia is among them. But when Mark Hamill and Carrie Fisher embrace, he doesn't call her Leia !
The Empire Strikes Back
- Actor John Ratzenberger (Cliff from 'Cheers') plays Maj. Derlin, that's no secret.
But I could swear he is also at least one other character with a different voice! Maybe I'm wrong.
- After C-3PO has been blasted to pieces and the group (sans Han) is escaping into the Falcon with 3PO on
Chewie's back, I recall seeing some part of C-3PO knock loose a light fixture on the outside
of the ship.
Was Luke right ("What a piece of junk!")?
- I read somewhere that, among all the asteroids in the background, there drifted potatoes
and sneakers!?
- That Imperial officer guy who says "Lord Vader demands an update on the pursuit." . . .
Isn't that Christopher Reeve ?! He even sounds like him. Probably not him.
Return of the Jedi
- Before Oola the green dancing girl goes down into the Rancor's pit, she accidentally flashes
part of her anatomy.
No wonder, with that skimpy outfit! (I read it somewhere.)
- In the forest of Endor, Chewbacca swings from a vine and does a lovely Tarzan yell!!
- During the final space battle, the Millennium Falcon is greeted by a huge number of TIE fighters
and, as the Falcon comes at us, you can see tiny TIE silhouettes on its underside. Look closely.
(I heard this somewhere.)
Special Edition
There were a few imperfections I was absolutely convinced they would
correct for the Special Edition re-releases . . .
- Vader motioning with his arm (as mentioned above).
- They didn't just fix the landspeeder's double shadow, they redid the whole shot.
And some things I hoped they'd fix (or add) . . .
- Chewie's Tarzan cry. It's the perfect example of what was wrong with Jedi all along.
- They didn't just correct the landspeeder's double shadow, they redid the whole shot.
- In ESB, when the snow speeder pilot finds Han with Luke (stuffed inside the tauntaun) and flies over
them,
I always wanted to see the speeder's shadow or reflection in the highly reflective snow. I thought they
might have wanted that, too.
And some they added, I'm not sure why . . .
- ANH - While Luke and Leia are trapped by stormtroopers in the chasm, I'm sure at times the laser
guns make sounds like real gunshots.
- ESB - While Luke is falling into Cloud City's shaft, he now yells all the way down!!
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