"Begin the Regime of Amendment B"
Lyrics by Rich Thompson - Music by Cole Porter
[Rich Thompson is a retired Presbyterian (U.S.A.) pastor
living in Austin, Texas]
Let them begin the regime
Of amendment B and rulings on gender.
It brings back the Inquisition so tender.
It brings back the memories ever-mean.
They're with us once more, those judges so pure,
Who simply abhor unchaste sexual playing,
And even the Psalms seem to be saying
There's no More Light in the regime.
To not ask and tell seems past all endeavor,
Except confessional sin clutches my heart,
When we are charging exorbitant interest forever,*
And repenting never of sabbath-breaking at the mart.**
What laws do forbid our raptures serene!
When clouds come along to disperse gluttonous tasting,***
The polluted earth****we so long were wasting,
We know but too well what they mean.
So don't let them begin the regime!
Whether living in sin as straight folks or gay,
You will ne'er be ordained as clergy or lay,
If they begin the regime.
Yet they must begin the regime at Halloween,
When the witchhunters that were before return above you,
Till you whisper to them once more, Big Brother, we adore you.
And we suddenly know
What heaven they're in
When they begin the regime. . . .
- *The Heidelberg Confession 4.110
- **The Larger Catechism 7.229
- ***The Second Helvetic Confession 5.039
- ****A Brief Statement of Faith 10.3