2.19 - A Not-So-Simple Plan
(Liars, Guns and Money: Part 1)

Stark returns with information on D'Argo's son and the crew comes up with a plan to rob a Shadow Depository in order to gain the funds to buy his freedom. But things are never as simple as they seem and they only get worse with the arrival of another customer at the Depository; Scorpius.

Before we hear about any plan inquiring minds want to know... how the hell did you get here? - John Crichton

Did you kill him? - John Crichton
Not exactly. - Stark

You ever hear of K.F.C.? - John Crichton
K.F.C. ? - Akkor
It is, to my knowledge, unique in the universe. And unique is always valuable. - John Crichton

Bring me whoever is in charge here. - Zhaan
I assure you, madam, I am more than capable... - Akkor
Don't elevate yourself. I know a functionary when one crawls in front of my face. Now fetch me your master like a good little minion. - Zhaan

Hey, Stark, riddle me this. What's black and white and black and white and black and white and...? - John Crichton
Scorpius? - Stark
And in the bank? - John Crichton
Here! - Stark
You knew!? - John Crichton

Don't turn this into a vendetta, John. - Aeryn Sun
I didn't. - John Crichton

Aeryn, I have to tell you how I feel. I have to tell you. - John Crichton
No you don't. - Aeryn Sun
Yes, I do... I do... - John Crichton
No. You don't. - Aeryn Sun

John and Zhaan are on Command, D'Argo and Aeryn watching from the door. Zhaan is holding Stark's mask while she and John argue.

Apparently Zhaan has received a "vision" of Stark telling them to fly in a certain direction. They have been doing so for several days without finding anything. The others have asked John to try to get Zhaan to let them turn back.

She refuses and D'Argo enters, demanding that they return to the slave auction to rescue his son. Even Chiana appears to believe that Zhaan imagined the vision. Distraught that no one believes her, Zhaan gives the mask to John.

John is about to ask Pilot to change course when Stark's face appears, filling the mask. Stark tells him to continue. Almost immediately, Pilot detects a transport pod ahead of them. They deploy the docking web and bring it onto Moya.

On the pod they find Stark, barely alive. Several express surprise at his appearance since they saw him die previously. They are taking him to Zhaan when he suddenly wakes up and tells D'Argo that he has found a way to save his son.

Later, Stark is in the medical bay being treated by Zhaan; the others all standing around. Stark hands a cylinder containing papers to D'Argo and tells him that he has a plan.

John interrupts and asks how Stark managed to survive. Stark explains that his body is just a shell for his true self and that when it was disintegrated he traveled to another place and got the information needed to rescue D'Argo's son.

D'Argo's son is being sold as part of a lot of ten thousand slaves; they will have to buy the entire lot in order to rescue him. The papers he has brought are blueprints for a "Shadow Depository", a kind of bank for thieves and pirates. His plan is to rob the Depository to get the money.

John asks how he got the plans and Starks says he helped the designer of the Depository to "cross over"
"Did you kill him?" asks John.
"Not exactly..." evades Stark.

Chiana seems to like the idea but several of the others start expressing misgivings. Aeryn says that a Depository has more firepower than a Gammak Base and Zhaan seems unhappy with the thought of stealing from anyone. Stark claims that the blueprints give him the ability to control all of the access doors and security systems but when pressed by John admits that the information is incomplete.

D'Argo wants to proceed with the plan but John tells him that he doesn't think it will work. D'Argo becomes angry and says they will do it with just Stark and Chiana but then Chiana begins to express doubts. He then becomes even more angry and turns to John.
"When you asked me to do something," he asks, "did I ever question if it was possible?"
John seems flustered. "D'Argo, I..."
"No, I didn't!" snaps D'Argo, cutting him off. "You're cowards. All of you." He stalks from the room.

Some time later, John and Aeryn are angrily walking through Moya. Apparently D'Argo has left and headed for the Shadow Depository. They get in Aeryn's prowler and follow.

The Shadow Depository is an enormous structure rising to the clouds from which a torrential rain is falling. John and Aeryn enter the Depository and find a number of aliens but also see D'Argo on the far side of the room.

A blue female alien with crablike appendages on her head is arguing with another alien. John suddenly sees the other alien as Scorpius and jumps behind a pillar, dragging Aeryn with him. She asks what is happening and he tells her he sees Scorpius. She looks but the alien appears normal to her, as it does to John when he looks again.

"And we're worried about D'Argo!" says Aeryn, rolling her eyes at John.

John and Aeryn attempt to go through a door and set off an alarm. Several guards appear and they are forced to surrender their weapons. John claims he was just testing security and says they are there to deposit the secret recipe for "K.F.C".

D'Argo uses the distraction to attempt to enter another door but an alarm goes off there as well and several guards attack him. He is able to defeat several of them before he is overwhelmed. As John and Aeryn look on the blue alien, who we learn is named Natira, approaches and questions him. He also claims to be testing security but she orders the guards to take him away. John and Aeryn leave.

Back on Moya, John and Aeryn angrily confront Stark and accuse him of setting D'Argo up. Both of them rough Stark up a bit but Stark says that it is all part of his plan. Since D'Argo violated security at the Depository they will have to reset their codes. While they are doing so he can link into their system without them detecting him. John and Aeryn seem dubious but, having no other choice to help D'Argo, agree to let him proceed with his plan.

Down in the Depository, D'Argo has been secured to a large, metal-frame sphere and is being tortured by Natira and some of her guards.

On Moya, Chiana and Zhaan are working with Rygel and one of the DRDs. The DRD is spraying some sort of shell around Rygel, making him look like a statue. Rygel is arguing for a larger percentage but they are ignoring him.

Zhaan puts a device inside the "statue" and says Stark will use it to switch their container for one containing valuables. She then has Chiana take an antidote and crushes a capsule which she says will suspend Rygel's biological functions and let him pass through a bioscan. Rygel passes out.

John goes to Command where he finds Stark working on the strategy table. John starts to tell him he is almost out of time when the table activates and a hologram of the Shadow Depository appears.
"I'm in!" says Stark.

John asks if the plan will work and Stark says it will; he spent too much time thinking about it for it not to work. John points out that he spent a lot of time thinking about the Farscape project too. Stark shoves him away and tells him to go away and eat, sleep or do nothing.
"That's what D'Argo says you do best." he says.

John instantly pulls his pulse pistol and shoves it against Stark's head.

"Did D'Argo really say that?" he asks.
Stark pauses. "No. I'm sorry." he says finally. "He didn't."
John tightens his grip on the pistol. "Any other lies you want to confess?"
"No." replies Stark, quietly.

John slowly pulls the pistol away and returns it to its holster. He tells Stark that if he wants to guilt-trip him then go ahead, but not to lie to him. He leaves.

Somewhat later, John, Aeryn, Chiana and Zhaan all enter the Depository with the "statue" of Rygel. Zhaan is dressed as a pirate (complete with eye patch) with Chiana as her assistant and John and Aeryn as guards. They are met by one of the Depository workers but Zhaan, who gives the name Aralla, insists on talking to the person in charge and they are introduced to Natira.

(Note: All through this sequence Chiana repeats the last few words of everything Zhaan says, producing a very weird effect.)

"Aralla" says that she has a valuable item to deposit for one day but that she is concerned about the "security problems" they seem to be having. She tells Natira that D'Argo was working for her and was supposed to test their security. She also asks that he be returned. Natira admits that D'Argo is still alive and Chiana expresses surprise that "they couldn't even kill a Luxan!"

"Aralla" shows Natira the "statue" and says that it is a valuable art item. Natira agrees to store it and releases D'Argo to them. Chiana takes D'Argo back to Moya. Natira then leads "Aralla" to the vault while her assistants lead John and Aeryn to a room where they can watch what is happening on monitors.

Natira summons a container, which rushes into the room at high speed and stops just inches from Zhaan. Natira tells her that the container is almost invulnerable and the pallet containing the "statue" is loaded onto it.

Meanwhile, Natira's assistants have led John and Aeryn to a room where they can watch what is happening on monitors. Another assistant arrives and whispers to the first that Scorpius has arrived. Both leave to inform Natira.

John keeps hearing Scorpius' voice and keeps waving his hands around his head as if to get rid of him. Aeryn mentions Scorpius and John admits that is what he is hearing but she interrupts, saying that Scorpius really is there. John looks at the monitor to see Scorpius, Braca and another Peacekeeper somewhere in the Depository.

Scorpius demands to see Natira and one of the assistants insists that he cannot allow her to be disturbed. Braca knocks the assistant unconscious and Scorpius tells him that this way it won't be his fault.

Scorpius suddenly starts staggering and the third Peacekeeper removes a blue rod from a case she is carrying. She touches something on the side of Scorpius' head and an assembly of some kind spins out of it. She removes a red rod from the assembly and replaces it with the blue one then returns the assembly to Scorpius head. John speculates that the rods are somehow responsible for protecting Scorpius from the heat his Scarran half creates.

The two see Zhaan conclude her business with Natira and depart. They leave to follow as Natira greets Scorpius. Outside, they meet up with Zhaan and everyone returns to Moya.

Elsewhere in the Depository, Natira is in a private chamber with Scorpius, Braca and the PK assistant. Scorpius tells her he is there for his property but she seems to want to discuss things besides business. She says that she had heard that Scorpius had been killed in the destruction of the Gammak Base and was glad to hear she was wrong. Scorpius asks if she confiscated his property when she heard he was dead and she admits that she did. He demands that she give him triple the value in compensation and, after a moment's hesitation, she agrees.

Back on Moya, John confronts Stark about Scorpius. Stark eventually admits that he knew Scorpius had a deposit box at the Depository and that he was planning to steal Scorpius' credits to buy the slaves but that he did not know Scorpius would be there. However, he does seem to consider it a bonus. He also tells them that he has modified their comms so that they cannot be detected and created a device that can open any door in the Depository.

John says they need one more thing. He calls Zhaan and asks if she can provide him with something that will explode when exposed to heat. She says she can.
"Don't turn this into a vendetta, John." Aeryn tells him.
"I didn't." is his reply.

Back in the Depository, Natira tells Scorpius that she has procured a shipment of Borinium ingots for him but that it will take a short time to gather them. Scorpius sends Braca and his other assistant back to their Marauder and tells them that Natira will take care of him in the meantime. They leave, reluctantly, as Natira comments that she knows many ways to "bleed off his excess heat".

John goes to see D'Argo. D'Argo is still in his bunk and is being treated by Chiana. D'Argo is still angry with John and the two almost fight. John leaves frustrated.

In the Depository, Rygel struggles and finally breaks free of the "statue" he was encased in. After further struggle he is able to get out of the container. He then uses the device that Stark gave them to summon another container.

Zhaan, Chiana and the others arrive again at the Depository and Zhaan asks to retrieve her stored items. The assistant expresses surprise but Zhaan insists. She and Chiana are led back to the vault while John and Aeryn are again led to the monitor room.

There, John experiments with the monitors until he finds one showing the room where Scorpius and Natira are having an... intimate moment. They finish and leave the room, leaving the case holding the cooling rods behind. John grabs Aeryn and they leave.

Rygel is crawling back into a container when it suddenly takes off at high speed. The wind caused by its passage rips his cloak off but he manages to get back inside.

John and Aeryn get to Natira's room and John opens the case of cooling rods. He attempts to put the substance Zhaan has given him on one of the rods but is unable to do so. He keeps hearing Scorpius' voice and is unable to fully control his arms. Aeryn sees the trouble he is having, takes the rod from him and puts the explosive on it. She has barely returned it to the case when they hear someone coming. They hide and the Peacekeeper assistant arrives and takes the case. After she departs, so do they.

The container arrives and Zhaan and Chiana watch as the crates in it are loaded onto a cart. Rygel sticks his head out of one of them but Chiana closes it and latches it shut. They head for the exit.

While the Peacekeeper assistant changes one of Scorpius' rods, Natira tells him that his ingots are ready.

Zhaan and Chiana and John and Aeryn all head for exits.

Scorpius opens the container and finds the head of the "statue". Natira is surprised and says that the things in the container belong to the "Delvian". Scorpius asks who was with her and Natira tells him a Nebari, a Luxan and two Sebaceans. Scorpius immediately realizes that John is there. Natira sets off the alarm.

Everyone starts running for the exits. They manage to get through a few security doors before they close but are trapped by others. Scorpius, Natira and the others go to the monitor room and start looking for John and the rest of Moya's crew.

John tries the device that Stark gave him but it does not open the door. He calls Stark, who is starting to panic, and asks what is wrong. Stark says that if they use the device it will let Scorpius know where they are. Aeryn says that they will be a diversion and tells Stark to reactivate the device and to block the cameras looking for them. He does. John and Aeryn again take off running.

In the monitor room the monitors all suddenly show nothing but static. Everyone there takes off to try to intercept John and the others.

Zhaan and Chiana get through several doors but finally reach one they cannot open. They call to Stark but he completely panics and starts pounding on the table. D'Argo knocks him out then takes his place.

John and Aeryn are intercepted by several guards but manage to take them out. John attempts to switch uniforms with them but they are interrupted by more guards before they are able to do so. He is also hearing Scorpius' voice more and more and is starting to have some trouble controlling his movements. He and Aeryn run.

Several guards surround Zhaan and Chiana just as D'Argo manages to get back into the system and open the doors. Zhaan tells Chiana to take the same antidote she did earlier and releases the same gas she used to knock out Rygel. All of the guards collapse (as does Rygel, again).

John and Aeryn are still running when he suddenly stops and says they need to talk. She says they don't have time but he grabs her and says he has to.
"Aeryn, I have to tell you how I feel." he says in a tortured voice. "I have to tell you."
"No you don't." she says, moving to leave.
He stops her. "Yes, I do." he says, earnestly. "I do."
She looks at him. "No you don't." she says, in a quiet voice.

Natira has apparently regained some control over the monitors. She tells Scorpius where to find John and the others. Scorpius sends Braca and one of Natira's assistants ahead and continues towards them. His assistant tells him she needs to change his cooling rod again but he ignores her.

John and Aeryn meet up with Zhaan and Chiana. John is still hearing Scorpius but tells Aeryn to help the others with the containers. He starts securing the doors to the room they are in.

He has closed two of the doors and is trying to close the third when Braca and Natira's assistant arrive. The assistant tries to hold the door open but Braca shoves him into the opening and he is crushed by the door. Braca climbs over the body but is met by John who knocks him out.

John tries to shove the assistant back through the opening but is grabbed by the throat by Scorpius, who is on the other side. Scorpius easily shoves the door open and slams John against the wall, saying he has waiting a long time for that moment.

John asks what Scorpius put in his head and Scorpius tells him that he implanted a chip containing his personality. The chip has been searching John's memories for wormhole information as well as influencing his actions.

Scorpius suddenly looks uncomfortable and John tells him that he put something in his head as well. Scorpius slams John to the floor and yells for his assistant.

The assistant opens Scorpius' cooling rod chamber and withdraws the rod. She looks at it closely and it explodes, killing her.

Scorpius tells John to change the rod for him and John, against his will starts to do so. He struggles with himself and drops the rod then starts to crawl away as Scorpius yells that he cannot let him die. John starts singing the US National Anthem and continues to crawl. Scorpius seems helpless on the floor but slowly reaches for the rod.

Some time later, on Moya, Rygel is examining one of the containers and the large, eight-sided ingots it holds. He says as soon as they find the exchange rate for the ingots they will know how rich they are. Zhaan interrupts and points out that they need to use the money to buy D'Argo's son and the other slaves.

Stark apologizes for panicking and Zhaan tells him he did well. D'Argo also thanks him. He says that thanks to him he will see his son again.
"After all these desolate cycles, I'm about to see my son." he says to Chiana. "And that tortured being there is the one who has made it possible."
"What about your other tortured friend?" she asks.
D'Argo appears angry. "Friends support each other unconditionally." he tells her.
"They also forgive each other." she reminds him. She pats his hand and leaves.

On Command, Aeryn finds John sitting on the floor, back against the wall. He tells her that his visions of Scorpius have been real, that Scorpius did something to him while he was in the Aurora Chair. He says that a part of him wishes he hadn't let Scorpius die. She reminds him that Scorpius would have killed him. She sits down next to him.

John continues to stare into space. He struggles for a moment, but finally speaks again.
"Aeryn." he says. "I... I meant... what I said." He shakes his head. "Didn't say."
Aeryn pulls him close to her and lets his head rest on her shoulder.
"I know." she says, holding him.

In the now empty cargo bay, one of the containers of ingots begins to rattle. One of the ingots suddenly sprouts legs and crawls from the crate and drops to the floor. There, it releases some sort of acid which starts to dissolve a hole in the deck.

We first learn of D'Argo's missing son in They've Got a Secret. Stark brings news of his location and the fact that he is a slave in The Locket.

Stark was "dispersed" by the Plokavians in The Ugly Truth.

Scorpius implanted the chip containing the neural clone in John's mind during his time in the Aurora Chair in Nerve and The Hidden Memory.

John actually learned of the chip in Won't Get Fooled Again but the neural clone erased his memories of that event.

We first see the cooling rod assembly in Scorpius' head in Mind the Baby.

Scorpius referred to John as "unique" and used the phrase "unique is always valuable" in Look at the Princess: Part 2 - I Do, I Think. John uses the same phrase to refer to "K.F.C" in this episode.

The overall title of these episodes apparently comes from the title of the Warren Zevon song Lawyers, Guns and Money. The title of this individual episode is an obvious reference to the movie A Simple Plan.

Is Scorpius dead?

What are the "borinium ingots" really?

John seems to be slowly succumbing to the influence of the neural chip. What will eventually happen to him? Will the chip eventually gain control of his mind?

, unfortunately, seems to me to have some problems. It is too bad because it could have been a really fun episode but I found a few too many points of it to be distracting.

First, I found the return of Stark to be very clumsily done. (Which seems to be par for the course for Stark, hislast returnwas a bit clumsy too.)

Let's review Stark's arrivals and depatures. Stark appears inNerveas John's cellmate and fellow Aurora chair victim. He escapes with the others inThe Hidden Memory. At this point he vanishes with no explanation.

He shows up out of nowhere inThe Locket. There is a bit of retcon where he thanks them for letting him borrow a transport pod but no real explanation of where he had been or why. He says he has come to tell them that he has found D'Argo's son. We can only assume that D'Argo told him about his son at some point since we never saw it.

Stark then vanishes again at the end ofThe Ugly Truthwhen he is disintegrated by the Plokavians. Yes, he did speculate that he would be able to survive but didn't seem totally certain. Now, here he is again and he just happens to have the rest of the information on D'Argo's sonanda plan to rescue him. How convinent.

Of course, he couldn't do anything simple like contact them over the comm. No, he has to appear as a vision to Zhaan but not to anywhere else. Then, when everyone is about to turn back, he appears to John (and still no one else). Fortunately they find his transport pod at this point so he doesn't have to keep appearing to members of the crew one at a time.

Why was Zhaan so keen on finding him anyway? They have been trying to make it appear as if there is some interest between Zhaan and Stark but, really, have they had much of a chance for any kind of relationship to develop?

John and Aeryn have been slowly developing a relationship over the past two cycles. D'Argo has had a few hookups but, lets face it, D'Argo's criteria seems to be that the other person be female and breathing and that's about it. And Chiana is, well, Chiana. But, in Zhaan's case, it seems odd for her to be involved with Stark given how little time they have really spent together.

At any rate, Stark presents his plan and immediately everyone opposes it. Not that the plan doesn't have problems and some element of risk, but it's a model of planning and forethought compared to half the schemes this group gets involved with. (They actuallyhavea plan for starters.) So why is this one so different.

It seems the only reason for the opposition to the plan is to set up conflict between John and D'Argo. Yes, D'Argo has a point; they alwayshavegone along with John's plans no matter how risky they seemed. And maybe John is opposed to this plan because itisn'tone of his. But that doesn't explain why no one else tried to support it; even Chiana wouldn't back D'Argo up. Have all of them come to accept John as their leader?

So D'Argo decides to run the plan on his own and heads for the planet. This seems like a really Bad Idea™ and one would think that even D'Argo would know better. Still, he heads for the planet and John and Aeryn have to follow him.

Somehow John and Aeryn get to the Depository first, even though D'Argo had a good head start on them. They try to go through a security door and get stopped by the guards.

A few minutes later, D'Argo appears and tries the same thing. He doesn't just get stopped, he gets beaten and hauled off for interrogation. Why didn't John and Aeryn get captured as well? Because D'Argo resisted and they didn't? Still, it seems odd that the Depository just let them walk off.

So now they have no choice but to follow Stark's plan. Now, for some reason Stark is very hostile towards John. Why? Did John hurt his feelings by not following his plan in the first place? If it weren't for John then Stark would still be a prisoner back at the Gammak Base and, as said, Stark really hasn't been around that much. Where did the hostility come from?

Stark's plan is put into motion and everyone goes down to get D'Argo. Zhaan does her pirate impersonation, D'Argo is released and the fake statue is put into storage.

Several problems here. Stark tells John that he can break security at the Depository since they have to reset all their codes because of D'Argo's failed break-in. So, the planrequiredthat D'Argo get captured? Did D'Argo know that?

I also find it hard to believe that the Depository would just give D'Argo back. It seems like they would be just a bit more suspicious. In fact, for something as secure as we are told the Depository is supposed to be things seem to be just a bit too easy for our heros. (Yeah, I know... they're Just That Good™.)

Then Scorpius shows up. Why? Yeah, it helps drive the plot, but why is Scorpius even here in the first place? What doesheneed the Shadow Depository for? It's a "kind of a bank for thieves and pirates". He's a high-ranking Peacekeeper officer. Peacekeepers don't have banks?

Maybe he has funds he wants to keep secret. Well, he isn't keeping his presence here too secret; he certainly has enough troopers with him. It seems he brought his entire Command Carrier. How does he explain that?

And it certainly seems that he is just there to get funds since his only concern seems to be the value of what he had stored. What does he need cash for? Again, he's a high-ranking Peacekeeper officer; what can he possibly need that he can't just requisition?

Beyond the plan there are other problems as well. John finally finds out about the Neural Chip. Of course, we've known about it sinceWon't Get Fooled Againbut John did have that part of his memory erased so they can be forgiven a bit for repeating it. Still, it wasn't as big a revelation as they apparently intended for it to be.

Also, I had trouble with the trapped money. I can see Stark planning to steal Scorpius' money but why would Natira try to double-cross Scorpius that way? She should know better than that.

One of the few redeeming scenes in this episode is the one with John and Aeryn, the one where he says "I have to tell you how I feel". The fact that he is finally willing to admit his feelings towards her is a major step in their relationship. She also acknowledges that she knows how he feels. She does not directly reveal her own feelings in return but it is obvious that she feels something for him too. She just is not quite able to put them into words yet. John and Aeryn are very close

Despite the problems I mention above this is not a bad episode. There are some good scenes with John and Aeryn and with Scorpius and the whole "bank heist" concept is good. It is just a weaker episode than it could have been. It is worth seeing, if for no other reason than it sets up the rest of the season-ending arc to come.