Kids & Dogs

I am of the belief that all dogs should receive some basic desensitizing to children, even though they may never live with or spend a great deal of time around kids. I had a 2 year old girl run up to my 100+ lb. Malamute one time when we were at a park and throw her arms around him. Yes, the mom should have been watching her child more closely and kids should learn how to behave around dogs, but none of that mattered at that moment. Hugging does not come naturally to dogs and this could have been a potentially deadly situation. Our hug that is meant to show love and affection, more clearly replicates mounting in the dog world, which is used to challenge or "dominate" (out rank) another dog. My Mal happened to have an extremely sound temperament, was very tolerant and had been counter-conditioned to accept all types of handling. As a certified therapy dog that went into facilities it was necessary that he not over-react if someone should accidentally poke, bump or step on him.

People who are planning a baby should purchase Brian Kilcommons' & Sara Wilson's book entitled Child-Proofing Your Dog (it also covers dog-proofing kids) BEFORE the baby arrives. Others include Raising Puppies & Kids Together by Pia Silvanni, There‘s a Baby in the House by Michael Wambacher & Your New Baby & Bowser by Steve Raffe. Dr. Wayne Hunthausen has a safety video out called Dogs Cats & Kids that is geared towards kids under 10. Ian Dunbar has a video on dog training for kids.

Begin desensitizing the dog to things even a well behaved, well supervised toddler may do. GENTLY pull the tail, tug on the ears, take a bone away, stick your finger in his ear, lay your head on his side while on the floor, etc. Do all these things in a non-confrontational way, without force and preferably with the use of special, tasty food treats. Do not push the dog beyond his comfort zone and risk an aggressive (warning) reaction. We want him relaxed and comfortable with this manipulation/restraint and to associate it with pleasant things such as food, praise, petting. Gradually do a little more at a time as the dog's comfort zone expands. If you have a very reactive, intolerant dog, please seek professional help. If your dog growls and tries to control you, you will probably need a leadership/rank reduction program as well.

Also before the baby arrives, accustom the dog to sounds and smells he will encounter. Perhaps get an audio tape of babies gurgling, cooing and crying. Sit calmly with the dog as well as playing with him, feeding him and other daily routines with these background sounds. Stock up on the powders, lotions and products you may use. If possible you can expose the dog to other people's babies, toddlers and children, but ONLY if it is a structured environment where YOU are in control! Better to have no exposure to kids than a bad experience where the dog is kicked, poked or otherwise treated unfairly. If you have access to well behaved kids and cooperative parents, give the dog treats while in the presence of the kids. If the kids are old enough and your dog is gentle, you can have the kids feed the dog. Don't let the kids push the dog, if he moves behind you he is saying he is uncomfortable. If a child continued to press the dog might be forced to give a warning growl. Have the dog leashed for control, but do not force him to interact with the kids.

Practice some basic obedience before the baby arrives, so you will have lots of commands to help you during the introduction and in managing your baby and dog. Crate training is highly suggested to avoid toddlers tripping on sleeping dogs in the middle of the night and being bitten when the dog wakes up startled. For most dogs it would be best not to allow furniture privileges, since physically elevating is unquestionably linked to psychologically raising status.

When you bring your baby home, depending on your dog's excitement level and how responsive he is to commands, you may want one adult to have the dog on leash (not actually restraining, as tension on the leash can transmit anxiety) and another adult to hold the baby. Tell the dog to "sit" if you want and allow him to sniff the baby's foot-end (avoid sticking the baby's head in his face until you are certain of his reaction). Give the dog praise, petting and a food reward, then end the session.

Of course this extensive preparation and all precautions may not be necessary with all dogs, but when it comes to the lives of a child and dog, I would rather error on the side of caution. It won't HURT to do this, but it may hurt NOT to. Some dogs seem to have a special inner sense about kids, the elderly, injured and some adapt more naturally to life with humans. Some seem to accept our human babies as the alpha pair's "litter" without question and with extreme tolerance and consideration.

If you are like me you may have stumbled along luckily without consequence (ignorance is bliss). When my son was born we had three spayed mixed breed dogs, ages 12 years, 5 years and 3 years. The older one had some experiences with kids kicking and poking her in the past, which resulted in her snapping. The two younger dogs had little to no exposure to kids. None of the three were especially status-seeking individuals, they accepted our leadership/guidance without question and never so much as squabbled amongst themselves. They hadn't shown aggression in any form, didn't have especially high prey drive and accepted other small pets effortlessly. When I brought my newborn son home from the hospital we let all three dogs sniff and lick him. We never had any problems whatsoever with the dogs and baby/toddler. My son was 4 years old when we lost the oldest dog. Fortunately things worked out fine, but if I knew then what I know now I'd never have gone into it as blindly and assuming as I did. I don't know if it was a fluke or a combination of sound temperaments and consistent leadership. Though I didn't take all the early precautions, I did teach my son how to behave around animals.

In my work as a dog trainer who works privately with behavior problems, one of the most common problems I encounter is dogs growling at family children. It would be far easier to start with these precautions in place than it is to deal with an already existing problem. Of the children that are bit, most are bit by their own dog or a dog they know. Most times there are plenty of warning signs, but often owners tend to ignore or not take them seriously until it escalates. I am always tremendously saddened when a dog ends up being euthanized for what should have been a preventable situation. Or when a child is permanently scarred, either emotionally, physically or both. Or even killed by their pet dog because of lack of adult supervision & preparation. Dogs are not furry little humans, they react on instinct.

Kids should be taught respect and proper treatment of dogs. Small kids and dogs should NEVER be left unsupervised. Dogs see kids as equals or pups and will treat them as such. Toys and food bowls left down become possessions to guard from a crawling baby. Kids do things that naturally trigger dogs to chase. Running, squealing kids are like prey animals, especially if they fall and especially if the dogs are in a pack (more than one). Dogs are stronger, faster and smarter (at least about dog things) than small children. Kids cannot enforce their "alpha" position over a dog because they cannot control the game. With the help of adults, dogs can learn that all humans are above them in pack rank. Kids can get involved in obedience training with your help. Kids command the dog to "sit" (or whatever), ADULTS place the dog if necessary, then KIDS reward. Dogs learn they must follow requests from kids and will be rewarded for doing so, but kids should never physically force or correct dogs.

As for games... I would avoid tug or war and wrestling/rough-housing games that set the child up to be over-powered or beaten by the dog. Chase games are also problematic; chasing a dog teaches it to play keepaway, while encouraging chasing kids can invite jumping, nipping, barking, aggression and liability. Good child/dog games are fetch and hide and seek. If your dog is not a natural retriever, fetch can be encouraged with the use of a longline on the dog or on the toy to prevent running off with it. Use a food trade off to teach them to "give" the item or two identical toys. Hide and seek can be with toys or humans! Show the dog a toy (he must like/want it), then have a helper hold the dog while the child hides the toy (no scolding for pulling, jumping or barking enthusiasm, though you may choose to put the dog in a sit stay or place the dog behind a barrier, in a crate, outside, etc.). Make your "hiding" place somewhat easy until you learn your dog's ability (on chair/floor in SIGHT in another room). Let the child release the dog to find the toy, helping only as necessary, and child rewards the dog for finding it. Alternately the CHILD can hide and adult send the dog to find the child. If the dog is not motivated to find the child, the child may make noise and should have food treats to reward the dog for finding him/her.

Child-proofing dogs is on-going because our kids are always growing & changing. Realistically your child is going to have friends over, which is another thing to prepare for. Guardian breeds may be fine with family children, but may show aggression towards children outside the family. Many dogs have issues with children that are mobile & “in their space.” When aggression towards immobile babies under 6 months is present, it is most often predatory in nature. Prey drive is an important consideration when choosing a dog for the family.

Don’t be fooled by ads for “kid friendly” breeds. This does not imply they will not need training, safe management & supervision to prevent incidents. Sure, some breeds come with less risk, either by virtue of breed type (original purpose) or size, but this should not replace responsible parenting, pet ownership & common sense!

Another activity parents often don’t take into serious consideration, is allowing children to walk dogs. Young children, certainly those under 12 or so, should not have the responsibility of walking their dog in public without the assistance/presence of a competent adult. Even if the child’s dog is completely “safe,” what is the child expected to do if another dog attacks theirs?!? It’s likely the child will be bit or worse, while trying to help protect their own pet. I see children under 10 walking big, strong dogs. If that dog wanted to drag the child up to another dog (or where ever), there is not a thing the kid could do to prevent it.

I feel kids can learn some very important lessons from dogs (and other pets), I can't imagine where I'd be today if I hadn't had my life enriched by dogs! However, kids and dogs aren't always a simple, perfect combo, it takes work on the parents' part!