"Studies show that fear of
public speaking ranks higher than the fear of dying.
I guess this means that most people at a funeral would rather be in the
coffin than delivering the eulogy..." Jerry Seinfeld
According to the Book of Lists by David Wallechinsky and Amy Wallace,
the majority of people fear public speaking far more than anything else, even
death or disease. Surprising? Not really. The mere thought of dozens of pairs of
eyes all centered around you, watching your every step, your every move and
your every mistake can frighten anyone, even the best of public speakers.
So if you are afraid to get up and give a speech, you are in good company.
But why do people fear public speaking? Mainly for the same reason people fear
other things...fear of the unknown. Just like going to college might have been
scary since you didn't know what to expect, or going to your first job
interview might have been frightening since you didn't know what to expect,
most people fear public speaking because they don't know what to expect. So one
of the first things to help over come the fear of public speaking is to take a
realistic look at the speaking situation and have an idea of what to expect.
It's helpful to think about exactly what it is you fear. Since we speak with
people everyday of our lives, and public speaking is speaking with people, what
sets it apart and makes it so frightening?
I'm afraid I'll forget my speech!
The way to over-come this is to practice, practice, practice. Practice in a
setting as close as you can get to the actually speaking situation. That means
standing up, speaking outloud, with your notecards and any visual aids.
I'm afraid people will laugh at me!
Remember that public speaking is the number one fear of most people, so they
certainly empathize with you as a speaker. Just as you wouldn't laugh at
someone trying their best, your audience won't laugh at you.
My audience will notice every mistake I make!
The vast majority of the time, your audience will never know you made a mistake
unless you let them know you made one ("Ooops! I didn't mean to say it
that way"). Even if your audience realizes you made a mistake, remember
they empathize with you and will understand. No one (including the instructor)
is expecting perfection.
I just know I will faint!
Chances are you won't faint for a simple reason..most people get a rush of
adrenaline do to the fear of speaking in public. If anything, this will cause
your blood pressure to go up, not down. Fainting is usually caused by low blood
pressure.
I just know I will have a heart-attack!
The feeling that your heart is going to beat out of your chest is a result of
the rush of adrenaline: the "fight or flight" reaction. Several
things will help your body disperse the extra adrenaline and make you feel
physically calmer. Taking slow, deep breaths (not hyperventilating), tensing
and relaxing your body and walking around or any physical activity.
Everyone will be staring at me!
Well, since you will be in front of your audience, they will indeed be looking
at you. But it helps to frame it in the proper perspective. When you tell your
friends at lunch a story, they all look at you too. Interpersonally, it's a way
to let you know they are listening and paying attention. So having your
audience look at you is a compliment. It means they are interested in what you
have to say.
Everyone will think I'm boring!
They will only think you are boring if you are bored with your speech. Your
audience will take their cues from you. If you are really interested in your
topic, they will be too. Enthusiasm is contagious! Your audience will also be
more interested in your speech if you speak with them instead of talking at
them. Everyone has been in a situation where the speaker is just droning on and
it seems like it doesn't matter if the audience is there at all...everyone
could get up and walk out and still the speaker would keep droning on. If you
really talk with your audience and give them the feeling you care they are
there and are part of the speech, they will be interested listening to you.
Since your body will already have a rush of adrenaline, drinking a lot of coffee or soda (or anything with caffeine) will only compound the problem. Additionally, the use of alcohol or drugs will only give you the false illusion that you are doing well with your presentation.
Remember that some fear is good...it's the energy that makes a great actor in a
show or a great performer at a music concert. A touch of fear is what makes a
dynamic, energetic public speaker.