Another Drunk at the Bar
Tonight Yovonne (waitress) tells me this guy threw away a full drink she'd just paid for. The
guy refused to pay for it, so I went to talk to him. I asked that he pay for the drink and he gave me excuses for what happened.
I let him know that I tend to believe a sober employee over a drunk customer and gave him an ultimatum that he could either
leave or I could have the doorman escort him out.
The guy wanted to talk it away. I said, "Tonight is my night off and I really don't want to talk
about this. You can leave, go to another bar and have a good time, but you've upset one of my employees and if you don't want
to pay for the drink than I'm asking you to leave." He still wanted to talk about it and I asked if I should go get the doorman.
He said, "Sure."
I went out and explained to Keith (one of the doorman) what was going on and that I wanted
the guy to leave. Keith went inside and took the guy out. Before he left, he tried jumping over some shoulders to call me,
"Dyke. Bitch. Prick. Dyke. Bitch!"
Not three minutes later, Larry (the other doorman) let the guy back in. I told Keith, who went
back in to get the guy out. On the patio, the guy let me know again that he thought I was a bitch. I told him, "that's exactly
the attitude that got your ass thrown out. Bye-bye."
Then, instead of going to another bar to enjoy the rest of the evening, he stood outside the
gate arguing with Keith. He asked, "Why do you have a problem with me?"
Keith said, "She asked you to leave so you gotta go. But I don't have any personal problem with
you."
The guy responded, "Why do you believe that dyke over me."
Keith replied, "You didn't have to go there!"
This story illustrates how some people are threatened by people stepping out of traditional gender
roles (e.g. a woman in a position of authority). By calling me a "dyke, bitch, prick" the customer in the story was attempting
to call me out as a woman who had (dared) to step out of traditional gender roles. He was trying to use homophobia (e.g. calling
me a dyke) to "remind me of my place" (e.g. as a "powerless female"). And he was attempting to shame me in public (e.g. use
peer pressure to re-enforce any internalized homophobia that may be present).
