Fanatical Attachments!

by Donald Garrison

The upside positive effect of fanatical attachments to Pop icons and Rock stars:

a. Environmental benefit from no 'peeling' rubber for teenage males showing off to 'real life' girlfriends.
b. Saves teenage girls from need to overuse makeup and wear expensive padded bras.
c. Need to 'learn to cook' drys up.
d. Saves trees, no long love letters (optional).
e. Cost of jewelry needs (including wedding bands) drops precipitously.
f. No threat of AIDs or unwanted pregnancy (optional - see Michael Jackson)
g. Strong video and music sales - shot in arm for music related businesses.
h. Love struck usually stays home Saturday nights relieving traffic jams in LA and NY.

The Downside effects of fanatical attachments to Pop icon's and Rock stars:

a. Tends to eat lots of chocolate and get zits.
b. Lack of exercise - excepting tear ducts usually remain clean - well used.
c. Imbuing love interest with super human powers (Optional - unless Superman is love interest).
d. Every cent earned spent on collecting useless media generated videos, music, books and plastic stuff. (see shot-in-arm above)
e. Traffic jams around Graceland and MJ's place in California.
f. Traffic jams around court houses during court sessions featuring mis-deeds of love interest.
g. Occasional hair pulling frenzy with other fanatics over ownership of a particular love interest.
h. Loss of hearing from playing music/video too loudly in order to try and hear one's name mentioned by love interest, in a secret signal that you are the "one-and-only"!

D. Garrison dlg@esslink.com
http://members.esslink.com/~dlg/index.html

Copyright © 1996 by Donald Garrison. All Rights Reserved.
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