It's a bird, it's a plane, it's....

FORTRAN MAN

Roger Rydin, PhD

A Collection of Quotations (Gathered by a Former Student in APMA 203, Vector Calculus)

 

  - On the difficulty of planetary motion equations (deriving Kepler's Laws)

"Even if I waved my arms hard enough to fly, I'm not going to be able to complete a solution by the end of class."

 

  - On those "damned tree diagrams" (for partial derivatives)

"I will absolutely stand on my haunches and prevent a tree diagram from appearing on any quiz."

 

  - Following several minutes of alternately staring at his notes on paper, and those on the board

"I'm lost. I don't know what to do." -Immediately following this remark, the entire class laughed, then got up and left.

 

  - This came out of nowhere

"I better practice my German. I'm going to visit some friends near Cologne in June. Then we go through Italy, and end up in France. It's terrible..."

 

  - So did this (in relation to polar plots of cycloids)

"I used to have a little toy when I was a kid, called a hootenannie. I still have it. It's in a box.... in the attic..."

 

  - On finding centers of mass in three dimensions (and moments of inertia)

"The mass is not only changing along the teeter-totter, but the kid sitting on it is pretty fat, so you have to integrate sideways as well."

 

  - For all occasions (as an alternative to analytic solutions)

"Let me show you how to do this (numerically) in FORTRAN 90."