A few items of note:

 

Mayor Rocky Anderson has told city employees that they can’t use cell phones while driving.  The mayor put an order into effect banning city employees from using cell phones while driving on public business.  It also covers employees who possess city-owned phones while driving on personal business.  Violators face an unspecified punishment, most likely a super-secret probation.  The order does not apply to cops, but they should be using their radios, not cell phones.  Rocky is pushing the legislature to ban all use of cell phones while driving.  A few representatives texted the mayor giving him their support.  Rumor has it a few of them used their BlackBerries while driving to the golf course.

 

Speaking of our whacky mayor, the debate between him and Sean Hannity is probably off for good now.  The thing was planned for May 4 on the campus of the University of Utah (great timing – right during graduation weekend).  Now Hannity is objected to the fact that some students were setting up to do a documentary film of the event.  Hannity’s people are saying this is against the contract.  Rocky’s people are saying that there is nothing in the contract about it.  I think both of them are looking for an excuse to get out of this because both will take a PR hit if they get up there and start slugging away.  Besides, who has Hannity ever debated against except a radio microphone.  Okay, maybe that’s not fair, but really now.

 

This just in: Salt Lake City is actually in the desert.  People here think we live in a part of the East that just doesn’t get that much rain.  I have seen people watering their lawns already.  Why?  The lawns are still green.  Spring isn’t over yet.  And we didn’t get much snow this winter so these nut jobs are already using up our water for the year on their lawns because they were stupid and planted Kentucky Bluegrass in a place that used to have sagebrush.  Brilliant!

 

So Brad Stone at the New York Times wrote an article about how people were coping with the 10 hours of non-service for BlackBerry users the other day.  He likened it to drug addition withdrawals.  One person was quoted as saying, “I started taking it apart. Turning it off. Turning it on. I took the battery out and cleaned it on my shirt. I was running around my hotel like a freak. It’s very sad. I love this thing.”

 

This is just sad.  5 million Americans were lost Tuesday night until Wednesday morning when they were again tethered to the rest of the world.  How about this quote from a woman: “I quit smoking 28 years ago,” she said, “and that was easier than being without my BlackBerry.”  How completely sad.  Or how about this one: “I have reached the point where I get phantom vibrations, even when I’m not carrying the thing,” he said. “That sure doesn’t sound too healthy, does it?”  No, not one bit.

 

If I ever get tethered to a machine it better be a medical device designed to keep me alive, you know, like a ventilator or a kidney dialysis machine.  I understand some people need these things for work, but really now.  If someone needs to be checking email ever 30 seconds, then you are missing the rest of the world around you. 

 

 

 

The number of BlackBerry users have shot up since the Pearl came out.  On a cool scale, it won’t stack up to the forthcoming iPhone, but from a functionality point of view, the Apple folks could learn a lot from RIM and the Pearl.  That being said, it is still no excuse for people to give these things more attention than they give their kids.

So many things I could talk about on a national scene, but the point of this blog is to cover stupid things from Utah.  Well, not everything stupid, that would take too long.  I can’t add much to the Virginia Tech shooting, other than to say people here are taking it hard because there was a random shooting in a local mall by a young man with a screw loose just two months ago.  I don’t think these types of things can be totally prevented, but response time by authorities has to get better.

 

No, I’ll talk about something frivolous.  I’ll talk about the BYU honor code.  Maybe you are asking what the BYU honor code is.  Well, the honor code is a set of rules students and staff at the school, owned by The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (Mormons), is expected to follow in order to live the "moral virtues encompassed in the gospel of Jesus Christ."  The honor code's applications clarify the short set of rules.  Any student who disregards the code can be put on probation and, in rare situations, suspended.  Other private religious schools have them as well.  I’m pretty sure Oral Roberts has a set of codes like this, but BYU is pretty strict about enforcing this code. 

 

So what’s the big deal with BYU’s code?  Well, they changed it the other day.  The section they changed used to read: "Brigham Young University will respond to student behavior rather than to feelings or orientation. . . . Advocacy of a homosexual lifestyle (whether implied or explicit) or any behaviors that indicate homosexual conduct, including those not sexual in nature, are inappropriate and violate the Honor Code."  In other words, if they thought a student was gay they would do an investigation (of some sort) and if they found the student to be gay (in their estimation) then they had the right to punish.  Wow, how 19^th Century of them.

 

The code has been changed to read: "Brigham Young University will respond to homosexual behavior rather than to feelings or orientation and welcomes as full members of the university community all whose behavior meets university standards. . . . One's stated sexual orientation is not an Honor Code issue.  However, the Honor Code requires all members of the university community to manifest a strict commitment to the law of chastity."  In other words, it is okay if a student is gay as long as the student is not openly gay and having orgies in his/her apartment.  So, BYU has moved into the 20^th Century.  Congratulations!

Did you hear about the veterinarian that got his hand bitten off by a crocodile?  No, seriously, it happened.  The Nile crocodile severed Chang Po-yu's forearm at the Taiwan Shaoshan Zoo when the veterinarian tried to retrieve a tranquilizer dart from the reptile's hide, zoo officials said.  The doc didn’t notice that the thing wasn’t down yet and reached his hand in.  Oops.  Look at this picture.  The croc is just sitting there with it, teasing the vet to come get his hand.  Zoo keepers tried to shoot the croc – it didn’t work.  Crocodiles have been around in one form or another for millions of years, so I think they are pretty tough critters.

 

 

It seems like the Purdue football team is having problems with players getting into trouble.  Well, they aren’t alone.  One of Utah’s best teams is having problems.  The University of Utah?  No!  Two Brigham Young University football players were suspended from the team after they were arrested for breaking into two apartments early Saturday.  The two went into the apartment building looking for some punks throwing water balloons out the window.  Terrance Deshawn Hooks and Vitale Ta'aaga Magauli "Vic" So'oto were booked into the Utah County jail on suspicion of burglary after kicking in two doors at the Parkway Crossing Apartment complex.  Not sure where the burglary is coming from, it should be battery or just plain old breaking and entering.

 

Apparently, a water filled balloon of death hit Hooks’ girlfriend in the leg.  She got mad and started mouthing off to the fun loving Mormon kids throwing said balloons.  She goes and gets her boyfriend, the big, bad football player.  He comes over with a buddy and starts smashing in doors looking for the fun loving Mormon kids.  Police got there before the two could find the fun loving Mormon kids hiding in a closet.

 

These two are the second and third BYU football players to be suspended this spring for behavior not befitting a fun loving Mormon kid.  So, not all is happy down in Happy Valley.  Goes to show, even the programs with squeaky clean reputations have their issues.

Well, I’ve made my contribution goal for the MS 150 bike tour in June thanks to some very generous donations by the people I know.  My team from work did a training ride last week – an easy 20+ mile ride over mostly flat roads.  I rode my mountain bike.  Mountain bikes aren’t meant for long road rides.  I felt it the next day.  So, I’ve gotten myself a road bike.  Because I don’t think I’ll be anywhere near the front, I’m not worried about having the best bike possible. Got a Trek 1000.  Frankly, I think most people out riding their bikes around with the top of the line EVERYTHING, including socks, need to rethink their hobby.  Last week someone gave me grief because I don’t have bicycle shoes with the clip-on pedal and quick releases.  My statement was simple – I don’t race so I’m not close to professional level, so spending money on something I don’t need doesn’t make sense.  I then asked him which race he was last in.  He told me it was last year’s MS 150 bike tour.  I asked him if this race gives out prizes for the first ones across the line at the end.  No – the prizes go to the people raising the most money.  Huh?  Well, I told him that I was pretty sure that I could raise just as much money with running shoes on as I could with bike shoes on.  Last I looked, I’ve raise more money than said person has so far. 

 

Funnier story: a hippie stopped me today to ask why people where all the stretchy-pants with the sponsors on them when they ride.  Tim “The Grey Hippie” stopped me because I was just wearing shorts and a t-shirt while on my bike.  I told him that I didn’t know why people felt the need to spend $90 on a pair of shorts, but it was probably so they could look professional.  I didn’t want to get into a debate with him for a few reasons.  First, he was dropping “F” bombs like crazy.  Second, he was already well lubricated with PBR in his hippie beer cozy.  And third, I didn’t want to tell him that I was wasn’t wearing those types of clothes because I was just going down the street a couple of blocks and was and didn’t feel like changing.  I’m pretty sure I’m gonna want those expensive pants come mile 75 on the bike.  You need to be careful with well lubricated hippies, because they could do 50 miles on a banana bike seat and not feel a thing.  Then you would feel dumb.

 

I just found out that if I raise $500 I get a commemorative cycling jersey.  Whoo-hoo, free stuff! 

This could be our next president. 

 

 

 

Knowing full well that the President of the United States has plenty of candid photos taken of him (sometime in the future - her) on a regular basis – but how would you like a steady stream of this.  So, if you want to vote Democrat in 2008, you have a choice between a younger man with a Muslim background who now tries to come across as non-denominational Christian (but is really still an enigma to people), or this person. 

 

I personally believe a Democrat will win the presidency, but mostly because of what the current president has done.  Again, voting against someone rather than voting for someone…