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The use of language is essential in directing a person's experience and focus of attention. The Milton model, named after Milton Erickson, lists the key parts of speech and key patterns that are useful in subtly and effectively directing another person's line of thinking. Useful in sales, therapy, family relations and in gaining rapport in general, the principles of the Milton Model basically state that larger chunks (more general use of language) can lead to more rapport, which smaller chunks, (more specific language) is more limiting and has a greater chance of excluding concepts from a person's experience. (Thanks to Robert Dilts for permission to use his drawing of Milton Erickson.)
If I was to say "you know that you can feel confident about some
learnings from last weekend . . . " it is
much easier for you to agree than If I was to say "you
know that you can feel confident about unspecified noun
structures from last weekend . . . "
Learnings is an example of a
nominalization. To nominalize something means to make a noun out of
something intangible, which doesn't exist in a concrete sense
(in NLP, we say any noun that you can't put in a wheel barrow is a nominalization). In this
example, the process of learning something is turned into a noun,
learnings.
Being happy becomes happiness.
Being curious becomes curiosity.
Being depressed becomes
depression.
A state like depression becomes an
enormous and sometimes insurmountable, overwhelming state of being, for example, whereas
being depressed to most people
is more likely to imply a state that has a beginning, and more importantly an end. A
blockis something much more
insurmountable than something that is merely
blocking your progress.
"So close your eyes and think for a moment about some recent
learning, one that may have given you
much surprise and
enjoyment."
Notice in the previous sentence the speaker doesn't say how or where, but allows the listener to fill in with his or her own details.
"People can learn easily under hypnosis." There are a few things in this sentence which are
not clear,
Which people?
How can they learn easily?
What do they learn easily?
When phrases like these are used, the listener is forced to use his or her imagination to fill in
the who's and how's. Again, these types of phrases are useful for
pacing and leading when the speaker becoming too specific could mismatch the listener and break
rapport or minimize influence.
"So take a moment and enjoy remembering some of the things you learned and did at the
seminar."
What were your thoughts after hearing that sentence? Did you have a specific representation?
What did you learn and do, and which seminar did you learn them at?
Nominalizations are one type of unspecified noun.
(Don't you hate these silly technical terms?) are nouns that don't refer to something specific,
i.e., :
"This is much easier to learn than it
looks at first."
"This" doesn't really tell us what it
refers to. We guess and make an internal decision about the topic of the sentence.
"People can relax."
We need to guess which people.
also let us fill in with our own experience.
"This is much easier to
learnthan it
looks at first."
"People can relax."
We don't know how it is
easier to learn, or how
it looks at
first. Nor do we know
how people
relax, nor how
they can
do it.
are a way that we can lead people to easily accept our presuppositions.
"How soon will you be pleasantly surprised by easily remembering and using the tools you're learning this weekend?"
are another type of connection:
"If anyone can learn as methodically as you
do, they must be extremely motivated and thorough."
imply a cause effect relationship between two things. There are three kinds of linkages:
"You are sitting here right now, and
you can begin to relax." These include and
and
but.
"As you listen to the sound of my voice, you are becoming curious." These include as, while, during and when.
"The occasional sounds and noises from outside make you
feel more and more relaxed." Here you have words like
makes, causes, forces, because and
requires.
A linkage works by connecting a statement that is pacing something that is already occurring with a statement that leads the listener to some other (usually internal) experience.
means acting as if the speaker is doing exactly that. By making use of the art of speaking
generally, a speaker can make an educated guess about the listener's
internal experience to build credibility and deepen rapport.
"I know you are wondering how much
you will learn from this training."
"You may be curious about how you
will use these patterns."
We must be cautious to keep our references as general as possible. If specific details clash
with the listener's thoughts, it will disrupt his or her attention.
It's important to know about these
structures, because it's often
necessary to deliver presuppositions indirectly. These
types of phrases contain at least one
judgement or evaluation of which we can't identify the source.
It's important to learn language
patterns.
It's essential to have fun learning all this
stuff.
It's good that we are all here
tonight.
The speaker doesn't state exactly who thinks these things are good, necessary or
important.
can be used to direct the listeners experience in a certain direction.
"How fortunate you are to be able to learn so easily. It can happen with your conscious mind reading to know how quickly it may happen."
are requests for action or information masquerading as yes/no questions.
"Can you tell me what time it is?"
"Do you know what today's date is?"
"Can you lend me a pen?"
"Can you go into a trance easily?"
are ways of indirectly getting agreement from a listener. There are several types of
presuppositions:
Existence: "She saw the ice cream in
the freezer." Implies is, was. may be.
Before, after, during, continue, yet, already, begin, stop, start, still, while,
since, as, and
when. "You may hear noises in the room
while you are entering a state
of deep relaxation."
These assume action will be taken, the question is, in what order, 1st, 2nd,
3rd, etc. "Do you want to take a deep breath or would you like
to settle down into your
chair first?"
"Would you prefer a silk blouse or one
in cotton?" This presupposes that the listener wants a blouse. The question is which.
These assume the statement is true, all that may be questioned is whether the listener is
aware.
"Have you realized how common it is to be
in a trance?" "Have you
noticed how often you go into a trance, even by
yourself?"
presuppose that something is going to happen. The issue is how will the experience be?
"What have you enjoyed the
most about driving the new RX-7?"
"Are you excited about
makingthis purchase?"
"How easily can you
begin to relax?"
"Fortunately we have
plenty of opportunity to
practice this material."
Other Patterns | ||
Embedded Suggestions |
Ambiguity |
The More, The More |
Negative Commands |
Tag Questions |
Oxymorons |
Organ Language |
||
are suggestions or directives buried within a larger sentence. They allow the speaker to ask
more subtly and in a way that the listener can respond sometimes
without consciously knowing he or she has been asked. (We do this all the time without realizing
it).
"I don't know how soon you'll feel
better."
"You can learn these patterns
easily."
"Well, now . . . "
use the inability of your unconscious to comprehend language constructions that use
negatives (No, Not, Don't, etc.). For instance, if someone were to say, "Don't
think about pink elephants," what happens? Using negative commands can be thought of as
sending subliminal messages to the brain. Since the unconscious cannot
process the negative, only the positive message registers.
"Don't relax too quickly . . . "
"It's important that you don't make this
purchase any sooner than you feel comfortable doing
so."
"Don't go into a trance too soon . . . "
When words have double meaning, the unconscious mind must process all meanings. Words
like down, left, duck, hand, back all have double meanings. Then there
are words spelled differently and pronounced the same. Hear/here, your/you're, nose/knows are
examples. These can be extremely helpful in helping us produce
embedded suggestions.
"One of the things that's most interesting about you're
unconscious mind is its ability to scan for hidden
meanings."
According to Milton H. Erickson, "Tag Questions displace resistance to the end of a
sentence," don't they? In addition, they set
up a place to create an agreement
frame, as well as to strengthen agreement in a pacing situation. It's a fairly effective concept to
utilize, isn't it?
Once some degree of rapport is established, this construction the incorporation and
utilization
of other wise resistant behaviors.
"The more you try to resist going into a
trance, the more you find your eyes
wanting to shut all by themselves."
means using a combination of words that are a contradiction in terms.
"Try in vain."
"Notice those memories whose joyful pain are as vivid as those whose pleasant sadness can remind you of important lessons from the past."
is often used in day to day language, referring to parts of the body as part of a metaphor,
such as, "he was a real pain in the neck,."
or "I'm not sure if he's ready to
face that possibility."
"As you develop more and more confidence, it is possible to reach up to
face many different situations that would have been impossible
before."
"We are only beginning to scratch the
surface of this topic. Who knows what we
might discover as we study further."
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Changes last made on: January 3, 2004