STUDY GROUP META MODEL EXERCISES

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STUDY GROUP META MODEL EXERCISES - Possible Responses

1. Identifying and responding to Deletions:

a. Individually identify what has been deleted and propose a response to the deletion.

b. Share responses in the group. Did different people notice different deletions? Notice that there are many other meta model patterns in most of the statements.

What are the different direction can the different responses take the subject?

c. Remember, deletions only - here you don't have to go after every pattern.

Samples:

1. You always talk as though you're mad.

Mad about what? How am I talking that makes me seem angry?

2. Running away doesn't help the situation.

Running away from what? What/which situation?

3. The overwhelming cost of living disturbs me.

What is overwhelming about the cost of living? How does it disturb you? What about it disturbs you?

4. Communicating is always difficult.

Communicating about what? With whom? What about communicating is difficult?

5. My son's beliefs worry me.

Which beliefs, specifically? In what way do they worry you?

2. Identifying and responding to Generalizations:

a. Individually identify what has been deleted and propose a response to the generalization.

b. Share responses in the group. Did different people notice different generalizations? What are the different direction can the different responses take the subject?

c. Remember, generalizations only - here you don't have to go after every pattern.

Samples:

1. Communicating is always difficult.

ALWAYS difficult? Was there ever an issue that you didn't have difficulty communicating about? Can you think of one time when communicating was not difficult?

2 It's necessary to behave well in public.

Is it ALWAYS necessary to behave well in public? According to whom is it necessary?

3. Cats are better than dogs.

According to whom? Are ALL cats better than ALL dogs?

4. Practice makes perfect.

Always? According to whom?

5. That's unfortunate.

According to whom is it unfortunate?

3. Identifying and Responding to Distortions:

Follow the same instructions as for the two previous exercises, this time dealing only with distortions.

Samples:

1. His attitude insults me.

Exactly what about his attitude insults you? How is his attitude insulting?

2. He's angry at me.

How do you know he's angry at YOU? What have you seen him do or heard him say that lets you know he is angry at you?

3. I don't want to get angry, but she's always blaming me.

What about her blaming you makes you get angry? What is she blaming you about?

4. Your whispering distracts me.

How does my whispering distract you? What does my whispering distract you from?

5. I'm sure she liked the movie.

How do you know she liked the movie? What did you hear her say or see her do that let you know she liked it?

4. Clarifying Nominalizations:

Turn the following nouns into the processes they describe:

Attention

Attending to/paying attention to

Decision

Deciding

Tension

Feeling tense

Help

needing/giving/receiving assistance

Frustration

feeling frustrated

Temper

Becoming/feeling angry

Fear

Feeling afraid

Learning Disability

Having a difficult learning

Excitement

Feeling excited

Annoying disturbance

Being annoyed/feeling disturbed

Bad attitude

How is the person acting

Health

Feeling healthy

5. Miscellaneous Patterns:

Identify two different possible responses to each set of patterns. Compare the different directions each response could point the subject in, and discuss which is most useful and why.

1. My son's beliefs worry me. I know they are going to hold him back in life and be barriers to success.

Which beliefs/what about his beliefs worry you? How will they hold him back/According to whom will they hold him back?

2. Your whispering distracts me. It always has to be quiet in the back of the room or we won't get everything done that we need to.

According to whom does it need to be quiet in the back of the room? Who decides what we need to get done? What would happen if we didn't do it?

3. Your bigoted suspicions annoy me constantly. The accusations have left me feeling upset and in a deep state of frustration. They aren't deserved. You are trying to ruin people's lives by saying things like that.

What about my suspicions annoys you? What have you heard me say that makes you call my suspicions bigoted? What are you upset and frustrated about? Just how could the things I say ruin people's lives?

4. I'm scared. So scared, in fact, that I can't sleep or eat. If this keeps up I'm going to go crazy. You know what I mean.

What are you frightened of? What about being scared keeps you from sleeping or eating? How do you know I know what you mean?

5. He's absolutely got to do better. They won't tolerate that much longer, even though he's always done it that way. It's got to stop.

He's got to do better than what? What won't they tolerate? According to whom must he stop?

6. Let's not get bogged down in details. We've got to get to the root of the situation first or we'll never get anything accomplished.

How would we be getting bogged down? Which details are we getting preoccupied with? According to whom must we get to the root of which situation?

7. I avoid situations I feel uncomfortable in. I always have. It's just not worth it to me. I have to be alone and never do anything I really want to do.

Which situations make you feel uncomfortable? Has EVERY situation like that mad you feel uncomfortable? Haven't you EVER been able to do something that you want to?

8. It's important to understand all these concepts. At least by making the initial effort, we can begin to get things handled the way they should have been done before. I'm sure you agree that's best.

According to whom is it important? Which concepts? How would we begin to get things handled? How do you know I would agree?

9. You've got to take other's feelings into consideration. Otherwise it's unfair, and likely to make you a lot of enemies. You don't want that, do you.

Whose feelings do I need to take into consideration? According to whom? According to whom is it unfair? What makes you think I don't want that?

10. His obvious distaste for the way she was behaving upset her tremendously. Her depression lasted for days and days. He shouldn't have spouted off at her like that.

How is his distaste obvious? How do you know that? How was she behaving? How do you know she was upset? What was she depressed about? What did she do or say that made you think she was depressed? How did he 'spout off' ? According to whom should he NOT have done that?

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