RABIES #1 Aarrgh! From the far-off galaxy of Philadelphia comes Randall Phillip’s eagerly awaited monster movie magazine, Rabies. And quite the departure from his heinous masterpiece Fuck it is; although the layout and some of the contents (bizarre drawings, collages, weird faces, and odd statements leaping randomly off of the pages) are similar to the infamous earlier effort, Rabies is all about the monsters. In film, mostly, and of course in the accompanying posters, but the love of the fiend is also shown in reproductions of horror comix, halloween masks, novelty records, haunted attractions, and other fun shit. Among a load of vintage ads and photos Dr. Phillip reviews creature features Island of Fishmen, Demon of Paradise, Without Warning, The Vampire People, The Devil Master, Attack of the Beast Creatures, and, as an epic finale, provides a lengthy appreciation of ZAAT that includes video release news and a rare interview with ZAAT’s creators. A fond and youthful remembrance of rubber monster culture, the biggest drawback to Rabies is its price: at seven dollars plus postage the cost is a bit hefty for 52 pages. I kinda doubt Randall’s accepting trades, but you might want to angle in that direction. * * * $7.00 + $2.00 postage (no checks) from Randall Phillip - rabiesmagazine@yahoo.com - P.O. Box 2217, Philadelphia, PA, 19103

	RATED ROOKIE #6 The sixth collection of “Subversive stories of everyday all stars” comprises tales both personal and professional as subjects such as “My Shitty Coworkers,” barber college, working as an airport security screener, submitting to experimental brain shock, travel, “Canuck Cuisine,” getting hit on by one’s therapist, getting hit in the head with a frying pan, and the like are explored for fun or profit. Aside from the dedicated Rated Rookie staff, such characters as “Black Pimp” Boyd Rice and acrostic maniac Cal Begun (“Cal Begun might be a genius – or the worst poet Brooklyn’s ever known.”) are interviewed, and novelist Jonathan Ames even contributes the hilariously, um, moving confession, “I Shit My Pants In the South of France.” Special mention to the piece “No Fried Rice For You!” about the “sassy Vietnamese Mama” running a Southern-style cookery in Arkansas: “Fuck you, fat man. I hope you have big heart attack while you watch Hee-Haw and fuck your sister!” The writing is all crisp and college-educated, but the topics could use a little boost - many of the ‘wild’ stories aren’t quite wild enough (although Ames’ piece was pretty damn funny) and others don’t really go anywhere (ironically, the travel piece “Dispatches From the Global Village”), while more ‘serious’ entries such as “Beneath the Folds: A Roundtable With a Rape Therapist, Abortion Counselor, and Pubic Sculptress” are quite slight (this one giving only about a page to said roundtable). Still, it is an odd batch of unusual and often amusing articles, and as such a fairly sure bet to occupy you on either commute or commode. * * * $3.00 from Rated Rookie - www.ratedrookie.com - 562 Park Place #3, Brooklyn, NY, 11238

	ROTKOP #5: DRUNK Anything calling itself “The Drunk Issue” is going to be well met here at Paniscus Revue, and the fact that Rotkop is a nicely put-together anthology of art and scrawling makes it an even better find. Somewhat resembling France’s Hopital Brut in format (although predominantly black & white Rotkop boasts numerous color inserts and the collection is wrapped in a full-color silkscreened cover), Rotkop is a multimedia excursion through the bars and drawing boards of Belgium. Photos of revelers and post-party casualties (and a bored kid in a pub picking his nose while his folks get blotto right next to him), stories of drunken surreality, drawings of drinks, drinking buddies, and drunken sex, twisted collages, photocopies of shattered coasters and booze labels, and YES: drawings of drunken monkeys! (The centerpiece photo of a goat slugging down a bottle of Lone Star beer was a good one as well.) The only artist whose work I recognized here was Kapreles, but from the table of contents it looks like thirty or more people contributed to this issue. All of it is presented in a garish, hazy, double-vision type of way which admirably replicates the inebriated state responsible for inspiring the subject matter. The individual hands-on touches to the assemblage lift Rotkop further out of the gutter this issue revels in, as fold-outs, hand-tinting, tape-ins, and other additions make it clear that Rotkop is a careful cooperative product, not just the careless afterbirth of an arts network’s party scene. Contact information for each artist is provided in back, along with calls for audio and artistic submmissions and the announcement of themes for upcoming issues (sea creatures, sports, black people, etc.). And if that ain’t enough, Rotkop 5 comes with a “+Full Ceedee+” reviewed right below. * * * www.rotkop.tk / rot_kop@hotmail.com

	ROTKOP #5: DRUNK CD (As this CD comes with the above-reviewed Rotkop as part of the total package, yet a piece deserving of a review of its own, it is being placed here in the Print Reviews section rather than in Audio Reviews.) Tribal European drunkenness opens this audio accompaniment to Rotkop #5, as slurred barking and belligerent moaning joins shamanic percussion in “Pedanterieen” (other equally disturbed episodes of which will appear regularly throughout the CD). Spacey electronics follow in Formatt’s “Distilled”; kids get ahold of the equipment on “Brientje” while drunken karaoke improv players take over for “Klootzak Blues”; ZuKavsKi’s “Wulimaster” could aptly be subtitled “The Liver’s Revenge” (and well matches what could be called “The Colon’s Revenge,” the later flatulent piece “Geobuz Edit #2” by Thee Vaporizer); Katerzang and Bloated Ego & The Complements come closest to providing real performances with, respectively, the drunken acoustic guitar cabaret of “De Man en Zijn Bierbudget” and “Blind Date Blues”; Spacecactus delivers a piece appropriate to their name; SiCKBoY gets techno with the amusingly sample- and belch-laden “Drunkon Computer Drinking Milkplus”; and there’s loads more. I don’t really know if this 33-track festival is ideal drinking music (Manmanly & Laurent Cartuyvels’ “Hudrn-My Red Light Mama” will give you the spins even if you’re sober, and toward the end there are some really long filler segments of dead air/experimental/improv noise), but the shit sure is different. And, as always should be taken into account, the price is right. * * * www.rotkop.tk / rot_kop@hotmail.com

	RUBBER FLESH CUATRO - By Miguel Angel Martin The world of Miguel Martin’s female heroine Monika Ledesma continues to grow ever more strange and dangerous in this fourth episode of Rubber Flesh: right from the first chapter bio-silicoid agents place her “Under Attack,” but unable to track her down they beat, rape, and murder her boyfriend instead. Various agents on both sides pay visits to Monika, with violent and sexy results, as nanocomputers flourish, cars crash, limbs are severed, and the body-melting “bio-silicon reductor” guns are brought into play in a number of gruesome fashions. Several single-page drawings round out the book. As usual the finer points of these Spanish language comix somewhat elude me, but the hardcore mix of full-color brutality and pornography, along with a heavy dose of sci-fi conspiracy, still makes for a very good-looking book. * * * 4.75 euros (adults only) from Ediciones La C Pula - Plaza Beatas 3, Entlo., 08003, Barcelona

	SICKFUN Spain’s premier journal of underground art and culture has dramatically increased in size and print quality with this issue, now being a perfect-bound 140-page book full of, well, sick fun. The Randall Phillip-like collages “Parasitos” lead into an article on German genital cannibal killer Armin Meiwes, interviews with Miguel Angel Martin, Trevor Brown, Paco Alcazar, Romain Slocombe, Gigatron, what looks like a Spanish blackface rap troupe, Rayas, Pipas y Capones and 2000 Maniacs editor Manuel Valencia, what appear to be anti-immigration and anti-hippie rants by Billy Bob (Sickfun is written entirely in Spanish, so some if it is a little hard for this yank to comprehend), “Quality Time” by Peter Sotos, articles on artists Mike Diana and Joe Coleman, the exploration of ‘apocalypse culture,’ “Hate is Fun,” focusing on publications exemplifying the same around the world, art by Claudio Parentela, Teletubbie conspiracy theory, a story by serial killer Gerard J. Schaefer, the collage piece “Aryan Submission Youth,” “Democratic Western Virus” as documented by SS Sundra, “Gangs of Madrid,” a practical guide to suicide, and more, all copiously illustrated. Definitely fills the void left in the absence of the likes of Panik and Sewer Cunt. * * * Javier Diaz – javisickfun@hotmail.com – Apdo. 8074, C.P. 28080 Madrid, Spain

	SLEAZY SLICE #1 The first installment of “The Annual Comix Anthology that Squats on Your Eyeballs and Poops in Your Brain!” gets off to a good start with a collection of, well, sleazy art and comix sure to please underground fans around the world. Editor and Cinema Sewer publisher Robin Bougie starts the ball rolling with the pulp sex crimes of “Surviving the Night,” a Commies from Mars-style tale about rapacious alien cucumber creatures bent on destroying mankind. HAPPY man Josh Simmons contributes “The Land of Magic,” a delightfully vile and most non-PC reworking of the dragons and wizards genre; “Girl Gang” by Maxine Frank puts a twist on the rape/revenge storyline; Steve Carter & Antoinette Rydyr’s “Lust of the Blood Swampies” and “Scarred for Life” tweak rape and revenge even further in SCAR’s inimitable extraterrestrial style; and Sleazy Slice even delves into the racks of adult comix history with an illustrated article on the sorrowful history of “The Squaw Cunt.” There’s also a pair of Sleazy Slice Galleries, double full-page pieces by Wes Crum and yours truly. A smut book in the true underground comix tradition, Sleazy Slice is a variegated compilation of beautifully sick and twisted work that’s well worth the six bucks. Pick it up now while you can, it may be a collector’s item soon. * * * * $6.00 +age statement from Robin Bougie – mindseye100@hotmail.com - #320-440 East 5th Ave., Vancouver, B.C., V5T-1N5, Canada

	SMILE, HON, YOU'RE IN BALTIMORE! #5 Smile, Hon, indeed – despite the overly homey title this digest does an admirable job of collecting the writings of several (largely) East Coast writers and publishers on their experiences in and around the nation’s crab cake capital. Benn Ray refuses to be mugged; Hungover Gourmet Dan Taylor checks out a pair of Balto-area drive-ins (the uptight Bengies vs the wildly carefree Bel-Air); Davida Gypsy Breir photographs some of the town’s aged “popcorn palaces”; Michel E. Schuster remembers Baltimore in a deceased childhood friend; Steven Tandy is propositioned by lesbians; Susan Lantz investigates the criminal element in her neighborhood – the one coming from Mount Royal Middle School; and editor & author William P. Tandy contributes a few thoughts of his own. Rounding it all out are photos, contact ads, other writings, and odds & ends. The writing all shows experience and personality, with more than enough variety in style and subject to make the collection’s 52 pages fly by. It all serves to add a great deal of dimension to a multi-faceted city in which I’ve been fortunate enough to have a number of memorable experiences, making me eager to go back for some more. * * * $3.00 from Eight-Stone Press – www.eightstonepress.com – P.O. Box 963, Havre de Grace, MD, 21078

	TROGLODYTES From inimitable Dutch comix artist Marcel Ruijters and Top Shelf Productions, publishers of top shelf artists such as Josh Simmons, comes the bold new graphic novel Troglodytes. Within these pages Marcel continues to craft the abundant mythology he began chronicling some time ago, here bringing forth another series of stories set in the subterranean world of pre-human masons and priests and their violently archaic practices. The world of the Troglodytes is pictured as a harsh one indeed; those daring to question the primitive ritualistic status quo are dealt with brutally, as are those who attempt to escape their lot in underworld life (meeting the grimmest of ends as they often do). Sex is as much a factor as violence in this strange old world, and ripe as it is with creatures even more strange and savage than the Troglodytes themselves the potential for wickedness is too great to deny. And always, always, there is the mysterious orgone… It’s an astonishingly diverse and perverse world, and Ruijters has been living there for years, the better to report to we mortals the pre-history of our race. My one complaint about this volume is the coloration; Marcel paints in ink and white atop a type of paper screen-shaded with various op-art/moiré patterns, and the results are striking and richly detailed. In this volume however, possibly to convey the dank mildewed vaults of the Troglodytes’ underworld, most of the backgrounds have been shaded over with a translucent green. In some cases none-too-carefully. Atmospheric, yes, but it robs the stories of the deeper detail Marcel fills them with. Still, it is an amazing piece of work, and one you would do well to own. * * * $9.95 from Top Shelf Productions, P.O. Box 1282, Marietta, GA, 30061-1282

	TWO TONE CAT This copy of the Two Tone Cat came with a note promising that if I’d review it, writer Jeff Kane would “Jerk (my) dick off hard.” I’ll pass on the handjob, thanks, but hell, I’ll review this anyway. In these pages, illustrated by Jamie Craw (Hubcity71@aol.com), we first find the story of “Thanksgiving Turkey,” about a Puerto Rican bird named Miguel and his friends Paco and Faggy-Cat. Faggy-Cat has feline AIDS, Paco’s a poor scab-eater, and Miguel gets molested by Santa Claus and goes on to become a genocidal holiday savior. “Von Caril” is the tale of cat detective Rip Von Caril, his lust object Noony the mouse, and “disgraced dentist” & “amateur detective” Leafland Fellows. Their worlds are all affected by fictional killer Tom Ripley and rapper “Terrorist Mex,” and much like the previous story it all ends in bizarre tragedy. Queer-ass (as in both gay and just plain fuckin’ weird) storyline, outrageous dialogue (“Those lazy Spics wouldn’t chase a loose turkey if it pecked their wife’s vagina into salmon-flavored Fellow’s Feast!”), and childrens-books-on-PCP-style drawings, this shit is pretty out there. And that’s a good thing. TTC comes with the childishly-drawn “Aidsner Sanders Mini” #1 and 2, a tucked-in double-sided single-sheet fold-up of “Comics for Faggots,” all about celebrity weirdness, Bear Baitman, dreams, cowboys, blacks, Jaws, the “Floating Chinesian,” and who the fuck knows what else. Dig it. * * * $2.95 from Jeffrey Kane – CarilAnn2000@aol.com – 58 Polo Road, Great Neck, NY, 11023

	WELCOME TO FLAVOR COUNTRY #10 A recent college graduate, Kurt moved from Indiana to Washington and produced this tenth issue of his perzine about work and other concerns. There’s also slightly depressing realistic fiction, a write-up of the documentary Jesus Camp, “A Retarded Guide for Riding the Normal Bus,” “The Five Remembrances of the Buddha,” and “A Brief History of the Industrial Workers of the World (IWW).” Some poetry and photos are included as well, along with some found work haikus. A lot of this seems to take itself a little seriously, but then again, I guess it’s allowed to. Still, there’s enough variety here to keep it interesting. And, yes, I realize I posted the review to issue 11 before issue ten. * * Kurt – welcometoflavorcountry@gmail.com

	WELCOME TO FLAVOR COUNTRY #11 In this issue Kurt takes an approach almost inspired by the cut-up, using random words or phrases as jumping-off points for the various stories and essays contained herein. Which, for the most part this time around, seem to be wistful imaginings and remembrances. Losing touch with friends, discovering clove cigarettes, a high school reunion, existential angst, music and bands, wishful thinking. Photos of James Dean. Poetry. Not badly written, but a little heavy on the emo factor. And not for me, but you may have just found yourself a new Internet pen pal. * Kurt – welcometoflavorcountry@gmail.com

	WHISKEY PLUS #1 This music zine begins with “A Look at the Billboard Charts,” finding little hope in ‘Modern Rock,’ ‘Adult Contemporary/Adult Top 40’ (“Fucking Hoobastank”), ‘Hot Country Singles and Tracks,’ and even the concept of ‘Hot Ringtones.’ With a deservingly cynical ear Nate takes a listen to what passes for hits these days, dissecting the subject matter and more often than not leaving a steamer cuddled up in their entrails. In the next piece Nate and a cabbie friend sit in on a local karaoke night, criticizing the amateur performers not only for their execution but for their ill-conceived concept of barroom entertainment. “Songs Called Fuck You: A Closer Look” is pretty self explanatory, but gets points for actually counting the number of “fuck you’s” in each song. The surprise winner: Cam’Ron, who beats out the Feederz, Fang, and Pornstore Janitors put together. And of course, the bane of every office drone’s existence, “Reviews of the Music My Coworker Listens to While I’m Hungover.” (‘Local DJs Discussing Sports’: And the gun comes out of the desk drawer, and…) Lastly, Nate takes a look at, and slags the shit out of, Oasis and the people not bright enough to NOT go online and brag about their love of said limeys. There’s a little more thought put into writing here than there is in many zines, making the articles more readable than their titles might indicate. And for only a buck plus, it’s probably cheaper and healthier than your ticket for a one-way commute. * * $1.00 + two stamps from Nate Gangelhoff – whiskeyplus@gmail.com – www.pickyourpoison.net – P.O. Box 8995, Minneapolis, MN  55408

	XPLOITED #1 The premiere issue of Xploited is “The Muni Issue,” largely concerned with the San Francisco bus system. Something along the lines of Constant Rider, XP embraces public transportation, getting actively involved in an aspect of everyday life that many people take for granted or ignore outright. The zine looks at favorite (and not-so-favorite) bus lines, Muni accidents, incidents with fellow passengers, and asks the question “What is Wrong with Muni Operators” as well as spotlighting one of the good ones. There are “iPod Worthy Playlists” for both the AM and PM rides, “Muni Dos and Don’ts” and even information on how you too can become a civil servant hauling the urban cross-section about. All come from the perspectives of multiple city dwellers and bus riders, providing a well-rounded look at one of the City’s essential operations. And what do you know, as a hefty half-sizer this is just the right size to fit into a coat pocket or backpack flap for your next commute. I always did hate the Muni, as the buses didn’t really run on time or often enough (especially on weekends), were overly crowded, and operated by drivers who were, shall we say, less than courteous. On the other hand, S.F. being the colorful city that it is, you could always count on something interesting happening each time you stepped aboard. You didn’t so much pay your fare as you bought a caravan carnival ticket. Even now, years later, every time I think of the homeless guy in the back of one of the downtown routes chanting, “Na-na-na-na-na-na-na, na-na-na-na-na-na-na, BAT SNITCH!” I still crack up. This zine reminded me of that episode again, so I had to laugh. Which means I enjoyed it. * * * Kathleen Neves – webmaster@exploitedproductions.com

	XPLOITED ZINE #002 Following “The Muni Issue,” and in keeping with the theme of the less-than-glamorous aspects of the urban lifestyle, the second issue of Xploited is the “Public Restrooms” issue. So you just know some interesting shit is gonna happen here. You get perspectives from “In the Ladies Room,” readings of writings on shithouse walls, bathroom criminals, and hapless victims of the common toilet swine. There are APR (Automated Public Restroom) and other bathroom reviews and online restroom resources such as www.thebathroomdiaries.com and www.Safe2Pee.org as well as others. Lots of pictures of toilets, natch, some pristine, some not so much. Even some with pretty girls on them. The print is a little small this time around, but doubtless that’s to save space and printing/mailing costs. As with the first issue, Xploited has collected the experiences of multiple contributors to create a well-rounded look at an often inelegant feature of the City. And, given the subject matter, the experience is rarely pretty. But it is undeniably one to which we can all relate. * * * Kathleen Neves – Kathleen@xploitedproductions.com – www.XploitedProductions.com

	YOU IDIOT #4 “Special Issue! The Secret Side of Satan!” What side, might you ask? Well, that most insidious one that dwells within all things innocent. Such as Christian Rock, Harry Potter and…My Little Pony. Nate laughs at them all, and then laughs some more, and he got more than one chuckle out of this reader. Nate’s a fucking smartass, and he’s fucking good at it, especially with ripe fodder such as Stryper, an endless supply of self-styled saviors (the mayor of “The Town that Told Satan to Get Lost”), exorcism in theory and practice, and dicks who think that Barney and the Power Rangers are agents of the devil. For just two dollars you can easily improve your commute or your daily constitutional. And remember: “Jesus Christ does not love to boogie-woogie.” * * * $2.00 from Nate Gangelhoff – www.pickyourpoison.net – P.O. Box 8995, Mineapolis, MN  55408

	ZINE NATION #1 A great new zine resource/guide from Canada, Zine Nation reprints articles of interest and instruction from other zines as well as presenting new material and reviews. Some of the articles are the standard DIY fare, like vegan recipes, “Self-Publishing Your Own Magazine,” and a pair of guides for punk rock bands on tour, but others are helpful and informative (Skot Deeming’s “Build Your Own Camera Dolly”) and some are just damned new and unusual, particularly Crimethinc.’s “How to Make Giant Inflatable Creatures” (?!). There are also interviews with Chester Brown, Ruba Nada, and the Bookmobile Project ladies, comics, some obligatory 9/11 and anti-Bush material, and packs of reviews for zines, comix, and films (along with ads for relevant publications and zine events). The layout is a little slapdash, but that’s kind of a given and as all of the material comes through quite clearly this never presents a problem. Which leaves you with a big, fat (84p) package of valuable material which, unfortunately, I cannot find a price for. Justin prefers hard mail, so send a zine or something for review and see if you can get a trade going, otherwise contact him at one of the addresses below and find out the availability of this issue as well as the second, due out 10/03. * * * * Justin Chatwin - zinenation@yahoo.com  - 17 Paton Rd., Unit #8, Toronto, Ontario, Canada, M6H 1R7

	ZINE WORLD #19 There’s loads more here than twenty-plus pages of zine reviews, but more on that in a moment; taking a journalistic tact Zine World starts off with a hefty dose of editorial news, about the war in Iraq (“Ten Appalling Lies We Were Told About Iraq”), suppression of expression in schools and on the street, and a would-be-funny-if-it-weren’t-so-spooky article on the state of our nation, “Welcome To the Soviet Union.” Lots of letters follow (including a bit of defensiveness from Zine Guide regarding their review in Zine World), as do brief columns by zinesters such as Grant Schreiber, Susan Boren, and Loren Rhoads, and then it’s off to the reviews. There are a bunch of ‘em, along with address updates, event listings, other “Publications That Review Zines,” and free classified ads. Dunno how you feel about paying for op/ed pieces and newsbytes, but the rest of the rag is chock full of the good stuff and comes well recommended. * * * $4.00 (no checks) from Jerianne at Zine World - www.UndergroundPress.org - P.O. Box 330156, Murfreesboro, TN, 37133-0156

	ZONE 5300 #1 Marcel Ruijters, whose Troglodytes grace the cover and a full-color inside comix spread inside this Dutch publication, was kind enough to send me a copy of the new glossy arts & culture mag Zone 5300. And although I don’t speak a word of the language I found it very much worth looking at. (Actually the language barrier works both ways, as though I can’t even read the plentiful comics, let alone the articles and reviews, being printed in the magazine’s native language has the dual benefit of both making it seem more exotic while at the same time shielding the reader from any pretentious clubby horseshit.) In addition to Ruijters’ violent oddity “Ambulocetus Horriblis,” there’s good-looking comic art by Nix, Guillame Bouzard, Matthias Lehmann, Reid, Geleijnse & Van Tol (“Fokke & Sokke”), Bernard J. Vonk, Pieter de Poortere, and Farida Laan. And dig the “Bonky Parking” sign from Hong Kong! It all comes in a colorful and attractive layout that’s lively but not so artsy that it gets in the way of the content. So if you speak Dutch, or just happen to find yourself stoned in the Netherlands, by all means pick this up. * * * 4.95 euros - www.zone5300.nl

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