New Audio Reviews	New Video Reviews	Paniscus Revue #11

Welcome once more to the new(er) and continuously improving PANISCUS REVUE Updates site - still sharper, cleaner, in alphabetical order, and, in short, simply better than the crammed table format of before. (Keep in mind that this effort is completely independently funded, keeping Paniscus Revue ad-free and meaning that it is not supported by grants or any other form of handout. Which kind of sucks; hey, send me some money!) The following pages (linked at top of page) contain New Print Reviews, while the New Audio Reviews and New Video Reviews pages nearby (linked above and below) are also being updated as regularly as possible. (New Pork Rind Reviews can be found below.) For other not-too-distant reviews from the previous issue of Paniscus Reuve, hit the Paniscus Revue #11 link. That site will serve as 'the archives' for now, what with the death of to previous www home, whose address is now owned by what appears to be a cosmetic surgery for weddings site (which, according to online translations, boasts such advantages as "Is Kyoto wedding would be Tarzan," and "Or why not get you too of the best boob style"). But perhaps best of all,  you can still watch the mystical Golden Shower Monkey ("Watch Me Now!" just below; highly recommended). Thanks much for your patience and support, and now please enjoy. Cheers! Watch Me Now!

	SITE LAST UPDATED :       May 12, 2013 – New Reviews: Print: Dying for the Truth: Undercover Inside the Mexican Drug War Video: Female Teacher: Dirty Afternoon, Nympho Diver: G-String Festival, True Story of a Woman in Jail: Continues April 30, 2013 – New Reviews: Pork Rinds: Guerrero Chicharon de Cerdo Gourmet, Hog Boss Hot Chicharrones Pork Rinds, Sabor Hispano Chicharron Delgado (all on this page)  Print: Grunted Warning #17, LOVE SEX FEAR DEATH: The Inside Story of The Process Church of the Final Judgment April 6, 2013 – New Reviews: Print: Dust & Dessert No. 04, The Kobb Log #3 / The Incredible Shrinking Kobb Log, Ninja Sushi #2, Planarian Liberation Army Vol. II, No. VI Video: Lawless, The Raven, Ted March 12, 2013 – New Reviews: Print: Brain Cell 850  Video: The Whore Church, Vol. I March 3, 2013 – New Reviews: Print: Le Carrefour des Morts, The Kobb Log No. 2, Planarian Liberation Army Vol. II, No. III Video: Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter, The Countess, John Dies at the End, The Possession, Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows February 4, 2013 – New Reviews: Print: Dust & Dessert No. 01, Kick #10, Readers Digress! #14, What’s For Dinner? #4 January 30, 2013 – New Reviews: Audio: Dethskul Print: Blackguard #4, Exploitation Retrospect #51  January 27, 2013 – New Reviews: Audio: Dispiria, The Illness Print: Entanglement, The Kobb Log Vol. 1, Planarian Liberation Army Vol. II, No. II May 16, 2012 – New Reviews: Print: Esoterra, Planarian Liberation Army I – V, Playboy Jan/Feb 2012, Smog City #3 Video: Sex Hell: True Story of a Woman in Prison, The Whore Church Vol. 1  March 30, 2012 – New Reviews: Audio: Erode and Disappear Print: Black Petals #58, Lab Findings #3 Video: The Dead, Redneck Carnage, Zombie Hunger March 26, 2012 – New Reviews (coming soon, more VIDEO): Audio: Shawn Lawson Freeman, Magnuson, The Surf Piranhas Print: Cinema Sewer #25, Mediocre Narcotica – Greatest Hits Vol. 1, Rogue #1, Sleazy Slice #5, Sowing and Dawning #4 February 15, 2012 – New Reviews: Print: BP #32, The Best of Die Fat Piggy Die!!, Kairan #6, Lab Findings #1 & 2, Paper Theater, Paper Tiger Comix #4, Photo Album Eight, Root Rot February 14, 2012 – Well will you look at that shit; almost a year since this thing has been updated. I've got no excuses. So, here just in time for VDay, is an assload of pork rinds: New Reviews: Pork Rinds: Da Heo Gourmet Fried Pork Skins, Domingo's Genuine Double-Cooked Chicharrones - Chili & Lime Flavored Gourmet Pork Rinds, El Mexicano Chicharrones - Estilo Casero Home Made Style Fried Pork Rinds, El Mexicano Chicharrones – Estilo Botanero Snack Style Fried Pork Rinds, Nice! Chicharron Pork Skins, Nice! Chicharron BBQ Flavored Pork Skins, Si Senor Pork Cracklins – Chicharrones (this page) March 30, 2011  – New Reviews & More: Audio: Sassy!!! Print: Cinema Sewer #24, Smog City Magazine #2 Video: The Dead Matter Pork Rinds: Da Heo Nau Lau (x2), Sword Fish Brand, Tropics Philippine Style, Romero’s Botanero Cracklins (this page) Reading List: Updated February 28, 2011  – New Reviews & More: Video: The Killer Inside Me, Outtake Reel, Until the Light Takes Us Pork Rinds: Pepe’s Estilo Casero Chili Limon Dipper Chicharrones (this page) Reading List: Updated February 6, 2011  – New Reviews & More: Audio: Ezra Holbrook Video: Resident Evil: Afterlife Print: BP #31, The Cleft Pork Rinds: Si Senior Pork Cracklins Reading List: Updated January 17, 2011  – Yes, once more it’s been a long, long time since this site has been updated. Head injuries will do that to you. Enough said. New Reviews & More: Audio: J Minus, Judge Jackson Video: The Alcove, Death of a Snowman Print: No Hope #5 Pork Rinds: Devines Pork Cracklins – Hot Flavor, Devines Pork Rinds – Hot Flavor, Mac’s Chicharrones – Jalapeno & Cheddar Pork Skins, Mac’s Chicharrones – Salsa Limon Pork Skins, Mac’s Chicharrones – Salt & Pepper Pork Skin (this page) Reading List: Updated May 5, 2010  – New Reviews & More: Video: Slaughterhouse of the Rising Sun Pork Rinds: Philippino Pork Rind Odyssey Part II (this page) Reading List: Updated April 23, 2010 – New Reviews: Audio: Bonedome, The Dick Panthers, Psilogod, Jeff Riddle Video: Combat Shock, Eagles Over London Print: Brain Food #16 April 18, 2010  – New Reviews & More: Pork Rinds: Philippino Pork Rind Odyssey Part I (this page) Reading List: Updated MANY PRIOR REVIEWS ALSO AVAILABLE INSIDE
	To have your material reviewed here, just send a sample or promotional copy to Tom Crites at PANISCUS REVUE, P.O. Box 21448, Long Beach, CA, 90801, U.S.A. Thank you.
	Last but not least, these new pages have the benefit of containing direct links to the addresses of contributors, where available. Also, in each review you can now click on an image to see a (slightly) larger version of the cover shot. Please note as well that due to the image-rich nature of the pages, some may take a moment or two longer to load and display.

	Bayanihan Original Pork Chicharon Strips Fried Pork Rinds Artificial Vinegar Flavor Being “chicharon strips” these are slim little twists of fried rind instead of the big hearty slabs we’re used to seeing. They’re light, crunchy and flavorful, even somewhat sweet tasting (thank you MSG). The artificial vinegar flavor is nicely understated, imparting a touch of tang without making the things sour, aged or pickled tasting. Trying them with some of the Mae Ploy Sweet Chilli Sauce (Manufactured by Theppadungporn [!] Coconut Co. Ltd., Samptran Nakhonpathom, Thailand. Ingredients: Sugar, water, pickled red chilli (sp), vinegar, garlic, salt, stabilizer: xanthan gum [E415]), which bills itself as “An Ideal Dipping Sauce” and tastes like a sweet sambal, is an ideal blend. Mae Ploy is almost more like a chili syrup than a hot sauce, and as such is an element unto itself. Paired with the rinds, although a little on the salty side, when dipped the vinegar, chili, sugar and pork meld perfectly into a sweet-hot crispy snack that would be perfect with a Singha or two. I’m going back for more even now. * * * Distributed by: Foremost Foods, Pomona, CA Ingredients: Fried pork rinds, sodium diacetate, monosodium glutamate, salt

	Pamana Special Chicharon Fried Pork Rinds with Meat Why a gamble, you ask? Well, first of all this bag is conspicuously missing a ‘sell-by’ date; for all I know, these could date back to the Eighties. And then there’s that odd addendum on the label, “With Meat.” I ain’t never seen that before. Peering through the plastic sack these look like slightly larger versions of cracklin’s, the hard little rinds with fat attached to them. There were some suspiciously darker-looking pieces lurking about in there as well, and I didn’t know exactly what the hell those were. And then again, there’s the price. These bastards were something like $4.59 a bag! Now I’m a firm believer in the 99-cent sack of pork rinds, even if the sack is on the small side. But five bucks is generally way too much to pay for a pile of oil-boiled pigskin unless you’re getting them fresh from the kettle from some roadside stand in a county you’ve never heard of. But I just had to give them a try. After all, they did come “With Meat Attached”… Ripping open the bag yields a rich, almost creamy aroma. Not bad, I thought. Selecting an ear-shaped piece that didn’t look too threatening I bit into it…and found it to hold a very satisfying crunch. And a nicely salted one at that. Most of the “meat” is indeed the fatty portion of the rind, tasty and by turns buttery and densely-textured. But even the harder and more formidable-looking pieces can be ground down with a bit of caution, and these have a satisfyingly smoky pig oil flavor all their own. However upon delving deeper into the bag we find some samples that actually do have big chunks of pork adhering to the lard. These brown woody nuggets splinter tentatively between the jaws, and although different these are not necessarily great. Flavor-wise these pieces are not quite burnt-tasting, but they’re not quite far enough away to qualify as desirable. In fact, I think I prefer those without ‘the meat.’ But for the most part, damn these are good, even if they are a little on the heavy side. In fact, I’m going to have to revise my entire opinion of the pork cracklin’ in general now. (Note: Opinions do differ. I tried these out on a friend of mine, and this was the reaction: “Ugh,” she said immediately. “I don’t like it! [Spits into napkin.] “Give these a bad review!” Sorry darlin’, they’re still getting a thumbs-up from me.) * * * Distributed by Foremost Foods Corporation, Pomona, CA Ingredients: Pork Rinds, salt, monosodium glutamate

	St. Michael’s Bulacan Brand Chicharon Fried Pork Rinds Garlic & Vinegar Flavor I don’t know what ‘Bulacan’ means, but through the clear plastic sacking these things are as purty as crystallized ginger. Now I’ve never had garlic & vinegar rinds before, so I was expecting something of a treat. And did I ever get one: the aroma is surprisingly subtle, but with the first bite the garlic flavor really blooms. Supported by the sour of the vinegar and the necessary salt, these are an exotic and addictive delicacy that leaves one with a warm and pleasant aftertaste. Perfectly fried as well, I might add, these would go nicely with an Australian lager. Hell, these are better than popcorn, and I love myself some popcorn. I actually had to force myself to close the bag so as I’d have some left over to savor later. I urge you to visit www.stmichaelschicharon.com and order yourself some; in addition to offering five different varieties of pork rinds you can also get ground fried pork rinds, fried pork ears (“Crunchy and Tasty”), and fried chicken skins (“The best part of the chicken”: Cartman heaven in a sack!). There’s also some information about the company, including the origin of their name, their products and their goals. The site says they’re currently based here in Long Beach, and if that’s true I’m going to do my damnedest to get a tour. Unfortunately the “Contact Us” section lists an address in Santa Fe Springs, even though the phone number given has a local area code. Further research is definitely required… * * * * Manufactured by Bot N Bot Inc., Santa Fe Springs, CA www.stmichaelschicharon.com Ingredients: Pork rinds, salt, garlic, vinegar, monosodium glutamate

	Pamana Chili Pepper (Sili) A “Product of the Philippines,” these inch-long green chilies packed tightly in vinegar looked like they might be a worthy accompaniment to the taste-testing. Especially since none of the brands being sampled are of the ‘Hot & Spicy’ variety. And wow: the first bite really blasts right through your sinuses. These little babies are pipin’ hot; they actually had sweat popping out on my face after eating just one. The skins are a mite chewy, but the peppers do their job and the almost oily palm vinegar provides a good additional note of flavor. God DAMN these are hot! Problem is, they’re so scalding hot that they actually shut your taste buds down for a few minutes. Which might not make them the most ideal companion to an event such as this. (Better luck next time.) They’re not particularly easy on the stomach either. And being so densely packed, one 12 oz. jar of these fiery little fuckers is going to last me quite a while. Hey, there’s a red one… * * Processed for Foremost Foods Corporation, West Covina, CA Ingredients: Chili pepper, palm vinegar, water, salt, lactic acid (as preservative)

	Elena’s Original Lapid Chicharon Fried Pork Rinds Mini May-Laman Style “Paborito Ng Pilipino Since the 1950’s.” Well, Lapid apparently comes from the name of the maker, but May-Laman evades me. Maybe it’s the style of spice: salt, garlic, chili and pepper sounds like a solid base, and you have to appreciate the use of “pork back fat skin” over simple pork rinds, if only for the sake of variety (in name, at least). And, once we get right down into it, this is a curious bag indeed. In only the best of ways: crisp, clean little curls, these are heavy rinds with rich nougat-like fat attached. And I swear there’s even a piece of fried bacon in here. It’s all coated with a mellow spice blend that makes you lick your lips in anticipation of the next morsel. Another bag I had to force myself to close before I inhaled the entire sack. Viva la Mini May-Laman! * * * * Manufactured by Lapid Foods Inc., Covina, CA Ingredients: Pork back fat skin, salt, garlic, chili, pepper, monosodium glutamate

	Goldilocks Artificial Salt & Vinegar Flavor Chicharon Pork Rinds Artificial salt flavor? I don’t know about that… I’ve never heard of the Goldilocks brand before, but they also specialize in “Cakes – Pastries – Bread – Asian Cuisine.” Why, some “Other Delicious Goldilocks Snack Items” include dilis, polvoron and boat tarts (can I get a chorus of “Boats ‘n Hos”?). Now to me these looked to be a standard variety rind: light, crispy, plain, uniform… And I was not incorrect. Tanged up with the sea dog flavors of salt and vinegar, the taste is mildly tart and sour with the rinds being very well fried indeed. But there’s not much here in the way of standout quality; they’re good, sure, the way you’d expect a pastry chef’s pork rinds to be. And they go well with the Mae Ploy. All they need is a little more flavor. Some chili and garlic perhaps… * * Manufactured for Clarmil Manufacturing Corporation, Hayward, CA Ingredients: Fried pork rinds, sodium diacetate, salt

	Prito Prito Premium Chicharon Fried Pork Rinds These look to be serious skins, fat heavy curls of fry bouncing around in the bag like great salted elephant ivory bracelets. There are some visibly thick members in here, as the rinds are twisted around horns of fat and brown bacon. And damn if these aren’t something fine. Lapid does it again: manly slices of pork back, equally rich in crispy skin and heady fat, often with meat attached. I found a deep-fried slab of bacon in this bag too, and was as happy as a dog. (“It’s BACON!”) Mmm… all that salt and fat. I may be dying, but I’m dying an American, and a happy, full-bellied one at that. (Belch.) So good. Yet another bag I had to force myself to put away so I could enjoy a few later. They’re also another bag that’s slightly on the expensive side, but well worth it. Like pastry, these are. Or, as George Carlin would have put it, “Meatcake!” * * * * Manufactured by Lapid Foods Inc., Covina, CA Ingredients: Pork back fat, salt, monosodium glutamate

	Bayanihan Original Chicharon Fried Pork Rinds These looked like your regular old crispy plain fried rinds, but they had a leg up with the “Vinegar Packet” that nestled down in the bottom of the bag. (Ingredients: Water, cider, vinegar, distilled vinegar, salt, dehydrated garlic, spices, modified food starch, sugar, xanthan gum, sodium benzoate.) The rinds themselves are light in both texture and flavor; the vinegar packet proved to be more salad dressing than spicy sauce. Not overly impressive, these, but not much to find fault with either. If you’re tired of potato chips, but have never tried a fried pork rind, this might not be a bad place to start. * * Distributed by Foremost Foods, Pomona, CA Ingredients: Fried pork rinds, monosodium glutamate, salt

	Bayanihan Original Chicharon Fried Pork Rinds Garlic Flavor The garlic flavored pork rind is a rind that is simply not readily available enough. Such a simple thing to add garlic powder to fried pigskins, but you won’t find these at every gas station’s mini-mart. And that’s a shame because, in a word, “They’re fuckin’ delicious!” Bayanihan’s is a perfect example: so crispy, so golden, so garlic… So go find some already! * * * * Distributed by Foremost Foods, Pomona, CA Ingredients: Fried pork rinds, garlic powder, monosodium glutamate, salt

	Bayanihan Original Chicharon Fried Pork Rinds Artificial Vinegar Flavor All right, I admit it, I screwed up with this sample. With a sell-by date of 12/19/09, I didn’t get around to taste-testing these until 4/27/10: and accordingly the results are a little skewed. Some of these rinds have maintained their crispness but most of them have lost it, devolving into something with a consistency somewhere between cardboard and Styrofoam. And they all leave something of a bitter aftertaste in the mouth, not an ideal quality in any snack food. Well, at least in this country. It’s a sad day when a fine rind is wasted, and Bayanihan has a good track record; so no rating for these, although I will say that I’d try ‘em again if I got the chance. And I was able to eat them in the same year they were packaged…   Distributed by Foremost Foods, Pomona, CA Ingredients: Fried pork rinds, sodium diacetate, monosodium glutamate, salt

            Switching gears here, we find:

	Elena’s Original Lapid Chicharon Fried Pork Rinds Classic These may be some kind of old school Philippino pork rind, but I am not a fan. First of all, these things are just way too heavy. And while I can occasionally appreciate some varieties of big fat rind (see Part I), these are not among them. Huge, thick strips of pigskin with a dense inner rim of fat, upon eating these call to mind the snack equivalent of a small deep-fried truck tire. (And I bet they’d burn just as fiercely as well if you set them on fire, but I’ll be goddamned if I’m gonna try that around my house.) On top of that, despite the favorable-looking list of spices listed on the label these rinds are remarkably bland. Grease is the predominant flavor here, and not the sweet, sweet pig oil type of grease but the stale, heavy and cloyingly unpleasant kind of grease that makes you re-examine the skin for carbuncles before getting them anywhere near your mouth. So if all of that is what you’re looking for in a snack Elena’s is your bag, but they are in no way “Classic” as far as I’m concerned. The one sack I was unable to finish. (Aside from the overly stale vinegar flavored rinds, above.) O Manufactured by Lapid Foods Inc., Covina, CA Ingredients: Pork skin, salt, garlic, chili, pepper, monosodium glutamate

	Elena’s Original Lapid Chicharon Fried Pork Rinds Vinegar Flavor Again we find big, thick gnarls of twisted rind, this time with a bit of tang to them thanks to the addition of vinegar powder in the flavoring mix. But they’re not nearly as flavorful as the list of ingredients might lead one to believe, and although sampled prior to the sell-by sticker most of these skins are still dense and lifeless in texture. And the fatty underside of the rinds, which should be sweet and buttery, more closely resembles some kind of industrial waste product than a tasty snack layer. Frankly I’m already thinking of tossing the rest of this bag out. About as attractive as granny porn, these are. O Manufactured by Lapid Foods Inc., Covina, CA Ingredients: Pork skin, salt, garlic, chili, pepper, monosodium glutamate, vinegar powder

	St. Michael’s Bulacan Brand Chicharon Fried Pork Rinds Regular No sell-by date on this bag, but they don’t need one. These stout skins are thick, crunchy and richly flavored with the simple satisfying elements of swine and salt. Nice and hearty, you could practically make a meal out of these. Which is what I seem to be doing. And with some hot sauce? Forget about it! * * * Manufactured by Bot N Bot Inc., Santa Fe Springs, CA www.stmichaelschicharon.com Ingredients: Pork rinds, salt, monosodium glutamate

	Bayanihan Original Pork Chicharon Strips Fried Pork Rinds By now it’s pretty obvious that Bayanihan’s rinds are more than fair. The regular flavor may be a little plain, but the hint of salt, and a little MSG, make these crispy strips almost too easy to eat. Strip style pork skins are simply rinds that have been more thinly sliced, lengthwise, yielding something akin to the pigskin equivalent of a french fry (or curly fry in some cases). And just as ketchup goes perfectly with french fries, there’s a condiment that goes equally well with pig fries: * * * Distributed by Foremost Foods, Pomona, CA Ingredients: Fried pork rinds, monosodium glutamate, salt

	Mother’s Best New! Chili & Garlic Sauce “Mother’s Best Chili & Garlic Sauce is made from the choicest red pepper and garlic which are almost indispensable in savoury cooking. Chili & Garlic Sauce is an exotic piquant sauce of the highest quality specially blended in the orient to impart a spicy appetizing taste to both Asian and European Cuisine.” And while I’m not familiar with chili labuyo or where it comes from (um, maybe the Philippines?), and I don’t know whether they actually used bell pepper vinegar or just forgot to put a comma in there, what I do know is that the result is a rich swarthy sauce unlike any I’ve ever tasted. Hot and spicy without being overwhelming, this stuff is just great. Unfortunately I only bought the one bottle, and at a mere 2 oz. this definitely ain’t going to last long around here. Whatever you’re eating, just pour a little Mother’s on and it’ll warm you right up. In the case of chicharon strips like those above, I recommend pouring out a little bowl of the stuff and just dipping the rinds right on in. * * * * Manufactured by HDR Foods Corp., Novaliches, Quezon City, Philippines Ingredients: Chili labuyo, garlic, bell pepper vinegar, iodized salt and 0.1% sodium benzoate added as preservative

	St. Michael’s Bulacan Brand Chicharon Fried Pork Rinds Salt & Vinegar Again, no sell-by date here, but with the success rate of St. Michael’s so far I had faith, o my brothers, I had faith. And I was well rewarded: this is a solid pub snack, meant to be eaten by the fistful with a pint glass glued to your other hand. Neither the salt nor the vinegar is laid on too heavily, the pair instead melding into a finger-licking flavoring that, well, just makes you want to eat more of them. So, I will. * * * * Manufactured by Bot N Bot Inc., Santa Fe Springs, CA www.stmichaelschicharon.com Ingredients: Pork rinds, salt, vinegar, monosodium glutamate

	Pamana Chicharon Snack Style Fried Pork Rinds Artificial Roasted Garlic Well, this one certainly wins the prize for the number of ingredients included. You will however notice the little blue sunburst up in the left-hand corner of the label proudly proclaiming, “NO MSG.” But oh yeah, that roasted garlic flavor is right there, and it’s layered with the subtle tastes of the other ingredients (onion powder, sugar, and, I believe, the various essential oils). Nice crunch to these, too. I wonder, again, why the garlic flavored pork rind is not more easily accessible… * * * * Distributed by Foremost Foods Intl. Inc., Pomona, CA Ingredients: Fried pork skins, salt, whey powder, garlic powder, sugar, torula yeast, onion powder, partially hydrogenated soybean oil, modified food starch, corn syrup solids, roasted sesame oil, natural flavor, soybean oil. Contains: Milk

	Pamana Chicharon Snack Style Fried Pork Rinds Artificial Salt and Vinegar Nice and crisp, but there’s only a hint of vinegar flavor to these. The natural essence of pork skin is the taste that comes through most strongly here, although that’s not a bad thing. Fairly average, although they do go well with the Mae Ploy (see Part I). * * Distributed by Foremost Foods Intl. Inc., Pomona, CA Ingredients: Fried pork skins, salt, lactose, sodium diacetate, corn syrup solids, malic acid, food starch modified, acetic acid, soybean oil, citric acid, sodium citrate. Contains: Milk

	BAKEN-ETS - Chile Limon Hot & Tangy Flavored Fried Pork Skins We all know how well chili goes with pork rinds, but “limon?” Well, it actually goes pretty good, a sharp citrus taste accentuating the chili and sugar and making sure your hand keeps coming back to the sack. What is a little off here is the texture; Frito-Lay is a massive food concern indeed, but their quality control department is a little lax when it comes to consistency. The rinds in this sample bag failed to be uniformly light and crunchy, instead often proving themselves more dense than crisp and delivering a decidedly artificial quality. I’d probably try another bag if it was put in front of me, but I wouldn’t go looking for one. * * Manufactured for Frito-Lay, Inc., Plano, TX – www.fritolay.com Ingredients: Fried pork skins, chili pepper, maltodextrin, salt, tapioca maltodextrin, monosodium glutamate, citric acid, sugar, corn syrup solids, partially hydrogenated soybean and cottonseed oil, hydrolyzed corn gluten, onion powder, spices, lime juice solids, sodium diacetate, artificial color (Yellow 6 Lake, Red 40 Lake), natural flavor, disodium inosinate and disodium guanylate.

	BRIM'S SNACK FOODS Buffalo Wing Flavored Soft Style Pork Cracklin’s Shee-doggies that’s a long list of additives down below for a packet of cracklin’s with a bible quote on it (never seen that before!). “Life Is So Delicious” shouts the bag; well, as delicious as tocopherol and disodium guanylate can make it, anyway. All that being said, these really ain’t too bad; heavy curls of “fried out pork with attached skins,” these are rolled in a sweet and spicy BBQ & hot sauce flavoring that has a pleasant approach and a warm lingering departure. The fatty undercarriage of the harder skin shells (only a couple of which were too hard to crunch down, even in a sample that was a bit past its sell-by date – kudos) gives these cracklin’s a hearty stick-to-your ribs quality that makes for a solid snacking experience. And just look at that lasso-wielding pig riding the flying buffalo on the label – I think I’ve found my next tattoo. Or at least my next baseball cap… (Thanks to Kobb Labs) * * * Manufactured by Brimhall Foods Company, Inc., Bartlett, TN – www.brimsnacks.com Ingredients: Pork cracklin’s, dehydrated hot sauce (aged cayenne peppers, salt, vinegar, canola oil, natural tocopherol, garlic powder), spices and spice extractives including paprika, sodium diacetate, salt, cornstarch, wheat flour, natural and artificial flavor, malic acid, citric acid, nonfat dry milk, disodium inosinate and disodium guanylate, partially hydrogenated soybean and/or cottonseed oil, sucralose, neotame and less than 1% calcium silicate to prevent caking.

	BUENOCITOS PICOSITOS CHICHARRONES Take it from the happy little sombrero-wearin’ mascot “Senor Todd” – these rinds are Buenocitos! (And that label would make a bitchin’ t-shirt.) Rapidly rising to favorite status here at Paniscus HQ, these are thick, solidly crispy rinds literally slathered with chili powder, making for a snack that eats like a meal. With a deep satisfying crunch that’s rarely downright hard or chewy, Buenocitos finds that fine line between fried pork skin and pork cracklin’ and rides it for all it’s worth. And with their warm chili flavor and secret rendering process Buenocitos has that all-too-rare authentic Mexican food flavor that leaves a pleasant aftertaste of pepper, cumin and pig oil. I was so pleased with these rinds that I bought up a half-dozen sacks to pass around, and while reactions to these strongly-flavored snack treats were mixed the overall reaction was that they grew on you and left you wanting more. There’s only one spot I’ve found that carries these, Kay’s Market on Ocean Boulevard, but I make it a point to drop by there at least once a week and carry out two or more sacks of Buenocitos. * * * * * Todd’s Incorporated – www.buenocitos.com – Vernon, CA Ingredients: Fried pork rinds, paprika and other spices, salt, hydrolyzed soy protein (6.9%), monosodium glutamate, dextrose, modified food starch, garlic powder, spice extractives including oleoresin paprika, citric acid, disodium inosinate and guanylate, with no more than 2% dioxide as anti-caking agent.

	BUENOCITOS CHICHARRONES These are not quite the gustatory reward that the above Buenocitos Picositos are. The plain variety does have a nice salt level, but very little innate flavor of their own and these crispy gnarls of fried pork skin conceal far too many overly hard chunks of fossilized rind. What they do have is a 10g packet of Dona Cuca Salsa Picante (Ingredients: water, chili pepper, iodio salt, alcohol vinegar, condiments (?), spices, xanthan gum and 0.1% sodium benzoate as preservative. “Hecho en Mexico.”) This makes some difference, as in the tradition of the finer Mexican hot sauces Dona Cuca is a spicy, tangy, creamy blend which makes any rind finer. But it just ain’t enough to soften the really rocky ones. A shame, that, because the lighter crispier skins are close to perfect. Unfortunately they’re just too few and too far between. * * Todd’s Incorporated – www.buenocitos.com – Vernon, CA Ingredients: Fried pork rinds and salt.

	CARMEN'S - Hot & Spicy Pork Rinds I was so happy to see a new brand on the shelf, as I always am, that I ignored the cardinal rule and bought a bag of rinds past its sell-by date (the only ones in stock). It was only a couple of days, but I don’t recommend such a practice; I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, a stale pork rind is nobody’s friend. There is a marked difference in both taste and texture when a rind is past its time, and it just don’t make for the best eating experience. Thankfully Carmen’s passes that acid test, staying crispy and flavorful beyond their expected shelf life. The majority of these hot peppery rinds are puffy enough to melt in your mouth, much like their Original Brand brothers ,and while there is a little variety in texture it’s all predominantly good. As is the flavor, although this does rely heavily on the salt and chili. All said and done this is a more than fair rind, but I can’t dodge the impression that this is more of a supermarket rind than a selective brand. The packaging backs me up here, telling me it’s a Snak King brand; and Snak King has a lot of brands. Take that as you will, but you can bet I’ll be buying these again. * * * Snak King Corp., Los Angeles, CA Ingredients: Pork rinds, salt, spices, hydrolyzed soy protein, maltodextrin, dextrose, garlic powder, sugar, caramel color, citric acid, extractives of paprika, FD&C Red 40 Lake, soybean oil, natural flavor.

	CARMEN'S - Original Pork Rinds I’ve come to appreciate the plain variety of chicharrone more and more recently, and Carmen’s Original style pork rinds are particularly worthy of appreciation. These light and airy puffed skins literally melt in your mouth, with a truly creamy texture that has to be experienced to be understood – it’s like all the best parts of the pig have been distilled into a special essence just for you. It’s a subtle flavor, true, and the sodium level feels like its on the low side, but adding a little extra salt to the sack both brings out the fried pork flavor and increases the quality of the skins as a drinking man’s snack. Me, I like to add a little Castillo Salsa Habanera as well, not that Carmen’s really needs it. If you live in greater Los Angeles county, check out your neighborhood ninety-nine cent stores and pick up a grocery bag full of Carmen. * * * * Snak King Corp., Los Angeles, CA Ingredients: Pork rinds and salt

	CASA DE ORO BOTANERO CHICHARRONES Snack Style Fried Pork Rinds - Regular and Hot & Spicy Well I’ll be god-damned if I didn’t go and misplace the reviews for both bags of Casa de Oro. But they must have been good, because I saved the labels for months. You know what, if you see these go ahead on and buy a bag, and if you don’t like ‘em you can always email me and complain. Gaytan Foods, City of Industry, CA (800) 242-9826 Ingredients: Regular: Fried pork rinds, salt. (Salsa packet included.) Hot & Spicy: Fried pork rinds, paprika and other spices, salt, hydrolyzed soy protein (6.9%), monosodium glutamate, dextrose, modified food starch, garlic powder, spice extractives including oleoresin paprika, citric acid disodium inosinate and guanylate with no mare than 2% dioxide as anticaking agent.

	DA HEO GOURMET Fried Pork Skins Look at that happy bastard on the label: know why he's smiling? Because he knows he just served up a gourmet batch of fried pork skins. And this is one time when the appellation “gourmet” is very close to accurate: these are big, solid rinds, rich with the condensed flavor of finely rendered pig oil. Simply put, these skins just taste like pork; they are literally brimming with flavor. So much so that beneath their very solid crunch there's enough concentrated essence of swine here that they're almost chewy, like some sort of exotically crispy pig gum. That doesn't sound entirely excellent, and ordinarily I'd consider this a huge drawback and a sign of staleness or poor processing. (Granted, these were purchased only two weeks ahead of their sell-by date.) But here somehow it works. Because they just taste so god-damn good. No near-flavorless potato chip substitute for the kiddies here, these are big-ass rinds for the manly and discriminating chicharrone connoisseur! And although salt isn't listed among the ingredients (you've gotta appreciate a product that lists its only ingredient as the product itself), there is salt here, believe you me. It's listed in the “Nutrition Facts” on the back of the sack, and it's right there in the flavor as well. In just the right amount, too; I didn't even have to use the salt shaker I'd broken out in anticipation of making up for any sodium deficiency. I liked these so much in fact that I actually had to force myself to close the bag so I'd have some left over for later. And when those are gone, I'll most likely be taking that 25-block hike again to stock up at the one market I've ever seen these stocked. DA HEO! * * * *  Distributed by Roxy Trading, Inc., Azusa, CA Ingredients: Fried pork rinds.

	Da Heo Nau Lau Fried Pork Rinds You gotta love the simple things, and it’s basics all the way here with Da Heo Nau Lau: just fried pork rinds and salt. It’s not real clear as to whether Da Heo Nau Lau is the name of the company or just ‘fried pork rinds’ in…Vietnamese? No brand name or country of origin is listed on the product label, and no Website is given. There’s no sell-by date either, which is a major drawback because this bag is obviously somewhere past it. A shame, too, because the subtle pleasure of lightly salted fried pig skin comes through clearly despite the resistance an overly long sit on the bench has given these. They’re still pretty good, but far from great. Let this be a lesson to us all. * * Distributed by West America Import and Export, Los Angeles, CA Ingredients: Fried pork rinds, salt

	Da Heo Nau Lau Fried Pork Rinds The larger version of…the smaller version of Da Heo Nau Lau distributed by West America Import and Export, instead of the more compact puffed curls the long bag with the blue label contains large sheet-style skins, the kind you have to break apart to eat. And while this is usually quite the treat, unfortunately here, as it is with the red and white label bag, the product suffers from its lack of a sell-by date. The ‘crack test’ was even exercised in this instance, failed to pass, and for some reason the bag was purchased anyway. (“Buyer beware.”) Again, you can tell that the quality is there; you can taste it in the lightly salted, slightly oily crisp of the skin. But that quality has been allowed to lapse over time. Honing down the ingredients to the essentials, leaving out preservatives and other food agents, makes it all the more important to get these while they’re fresh. And that’s hard to do without a good indicator. As far as these rinds go, unless you make friends with the owner of a shop that stocks them and can get the good word as to when a fresh shipment comes in, you’re better off leaving them alone. * * Distributed by West America Import and Export, Los Angeles, CA Ingredients: Fried pork rinds, salt

	DAD'S - Traditional Tender Cracklins Don’t think I’ve had “tender cracklins” before; that has something of an odd ring to it, but damned if these soft curls of rind and their buttery undercoating of fat ain’t too bad after all. They truly are tender, a welcome change from the rocky offerings some brand names purvey. With their easy-eating texture and pure porcine flavor these are some most edible pig snacks indeed; my only complaint is that they’re not salty enough for a beer drinker’s palate, and so light and greaseless that they didn’t really take the extra salt I poured into the sack. Can’t really fault ‘em for that however, so catch these if you can, and pick up any other flavors and styles Dad might be offering. * * * Manufactured for CFB, Inc., Richland, MS Ingredients: Pork skins with fat attached, salt.

	DEVINES PORK CRACKLINS Hot Flavor The first one of these puppies thrown back really put the ‘crack’ in ‘cracklin’. Which made me a bit leery of the Devines brand, but bravely soldiering on I dug back into the sack and was pleased to discover that many of these crunchy hog lumps were most satisfactory indeed. (Although I admittedly chewed them with some amount of caution – these are cracklins after all, not the more highly processed and considerably softer fried pork skins. And you know how moody cracklins can be.) Heartier than the more popular chicharrones, these snacks are warm and salty, well flavored thanks to the advanced seasoning blend. As mentioned above some of these took a bit of grinding in order to get down, but many of the others had that soft, delectable layer of pig fat attached to them which really brought the swine flavor swimming out. I don’t gamble on the cracklin’ too often, but Devines is worth the bet. * * * Distributed by Better Distributing, Clovis, CA Ingredients: Pork cracklins, seasoning (salt, corn flour, monosodium glutamate, spices, paprika, mustard, onion powder, garlic powder, oleoresin of paprika)

	DEVINES PORK RINDS Hot Flavor Devines pork rinds have a near-perfect texture, puffed up to an excellent crisp that’s at once smooth to the palate and satisfyingly crisp. The flavoring however, the ingredients of which match that of Devines Hot Flavor Cracklins, weighs heavy on the salt side, rather overpowering the other fine spices listed on the sack. (This despite the fact that the rinds actually contain less sodium than the cracklins.) As I’m a bit of a salt dog myself I didn’t mind this too much, and there was an underlying sweetness to the pork flavor of some of these pigskin pieces which made for an appreciable counterbalance. But I still would have been happy to trade some of the salt in for more spice. * * Distributed by Better Distributing, Clovis, CA Ingredients: Pork cracklins, seasoning (salt, corn flour, monosodium glutamate, spices, paprika, mustard, onion powder, garlic powder, oleoresin of paprika)

	DOMINGO'S GENUINE DOUBLE-COOKED CHICHARRONES Chili & Lime Flavored Gourmet Pork Rinds Gourmet, hey? Well at over $3 a sack they'd better be; conventional wisdom dictates that a bag of fried pigskins oughta tally up below the two dollar mark. But seeing as how this is a new brand to me (found at a fancy grocery store in Portland, oddly enough, rather than farther down south nearer the home plant) I figured I'd give 'em a try. The chili lime variety isn't one you come across all too often, either. And I must say, in this case it is a pretty good one. The lime flavor comes across more strongly than the chili, but it's a pleasant tang, none too overpowering, and goes nicely with the moderate salt content. (Then again I lost much of the chili flavoring when I had to resort to popping the bag open and, of course, it exploded from the bottom.) One cannot help but think of margaritas, never a bad thing. The rinds themselves are fairly average, perhaps a little more stout than some, and a few of them do have that slightly muddy bottom-of-the-vat taste that is always less than desirable. I would have hoped that a brand designating itself as “Gourmet” would have a notable texture, either being especially light and puffy or especially hearty; these are neither. I do like the flavor however, it goes well with beer and would, I expect, go well with any number of other beverages as well. I'd give these a three, but because they didn't truly live up to their boast of “Gourmet” I'm taking it down a notch for that. (Although there is a nice little story on the backside of the bag about Florencio Domingo and his wife Jesus and their devotion to “antojitos.”) * *  Manufactured by Gaytan Foods – www.gaytanfoods.com – City of Industry, CA  Ingredients: Fried pork rinds, spices including chile pepper, lime juice solids (corn syrup solids, citric acid, natural lime flavor), salt, maltodextrin, sugar, citric acid, lime oil, less than 2% silicon dioxide added to prevent caking.

	EL MEXICANO CHICHARRONES - ESTILO CASERO Home Made Style Fried Pork Rinds Simply put, these simply aren't very good. First of all, they just plain don't taste good. There's not enough pig oil on these to lubricate them by themselves, and not enough salt on 'em to get you salivating. Which is sorely needed in this case because these puppies were stale. Even though purchased three months in advance of their sell-by date, they were hard, dry, and nearly inedible. Not crispy, not crunchy, but with the texture of old stiff cardboard, as if they'd been left out to dry for too long before packaging. Even the little “Salsa Packet Included” couldn't save these. And a note to the distributor: A twist-tie does not a proper seal make. They sure look impressive though, nice and big and twisted with that hearty fiesta look. But size isn't everything. Right? O  Distributed by Marquez Brothers International, Inc. - www.elmexicano.net - San Jose, CA Ingredients: Fried pork rinds, salt.

	EL MEXICANO CHICHARRONES - ESTILO BOTANERO Snack Style Fried Pork Rinds These are good. Well, the good ones are. (Is that redundant? The good ones are good?) The prime rinds have that perfectly crisp, almost melt-in-your-mouth quality, that when combined with the smoky hot dusting of spice (which I do believe among the “spices” listed adds an appropriately small touch of clove) make them absolutely delectable. (And if you'll compare the below hefty list of ingredients to the usually tried-and-true recipe of fried pork rinds and salt used in the far inferior “home made style” rinds of El Mexicano's [above], you may see an additional reason...MSG, anyone?) Unfortunately the consistency is not even: some of these skins are hard and even downright dirty tasting, as if they'd been left at the bottom of the pot for too long. But out of a fat four-ounce bag these can easily be discarded and overlooked. For the most part. * * *  Distributed by Marquez Brothers International, Inc. - www.elmexicano.net - San Jose, CA  Ingredients: Fried pork rinds, paprika and other spices, salt, hydrolized soy protein (6.9%), monosodium glutamate, dextrose, modified food starch, garlic powder, spice extractives including oleoresin paprika, citric acid, disodium inosinate and guanylate, with no more than 2% dioxide as anticaking agent.

	EL SABROSO CHICHARRONES - Fried Pork Rinds Yes dear reader, I have enjoyed a variety of El Sabroso pork rind products in the past, but the cockles of my heart were so warmed upon finding these glorious chicharrones in a fat new 10 oz. bag that I could not resist posting the good words on their latest incarnation. Just look at the size of that sack! (Well, at least picture it, if you will.) It’s practically pillow-sized! It’s fuckin’ HUGE! Over half a pound of fried salted pork rind, ready to eat at only thirty-two cents an ounce. That’s less than a postage stamp, people! And oh-so-much more satisfying. The fine people at Snak King teach us two important lessons here about the fried pork rind – number one, look at the ingredients: “Pork rinds, salt.” That’s an elegant piece of culinary poetry right there, my friend, and a testament to the purity of the product itself. Read it again: “Pork Rinds, salt.” Let that be your personal mantra for the day: “Pork rinds, salt.” Nice. And the added ring of truth beyond those two simple ingredients, “Fried in rendered pork fat,” tells you that El Sabroso is an honest rind with nothing to hide. (For a comparison, take a look at the lengthy list of additives in one of the major food conglomerate’s popular nationwaide pork rinds. You know they’re doing more to their fresh and tender virgin pigskin than just frying it in rendered pork fat.) The second thing El Sabroso has to teach us about the quality of excellent rinds such as these is that they provide the perfect specimen against which to apply “The Whiff Test.” Hold the bag underneath your nose, pull it open, and inhale deeply of the rich fragrance of fat-fried pigskin that escapes. An important principle rises here, and that is that often the worse a chicharrone smells, the better it will taste. Artificial preservatives and coloring agents, and even spices, can retard the pure porcine essence of the pork rind, and in addition to the listed ingredients the aroma can tell you immediately how ‘natural’ or ‘manufactured’ your snack is. (And therefore how satisfying it will be.) What you smell in El Sabroso is the pure undiluted essence of swine, “Fried in rendered pork fat,” and it’s strong enough to revolt hippie vegetarians in a one-block radius. (Good; more rinds for you.) Mmm-mm. But by far the most important quality the chicharrone possesses is of course its taste, and El Sabroso does not shrink from this final test. These are rich, salty, and yea, as I have said before, buttery rinds of fatty golden goodness, with each fine rind tasting better than the last. Simple perfection on their own, but drop a little of Louisiana’s Pure Crystal Hot Sauce on there and you’ll be creaming in your overalls. The only oddity to be found regarding El Sabroso is that these rinds are so rich that they actually stick to your ribs – and your teeth, and your gums . . . No complaints on this end, mind you, that there is a richness that lasts, just a reminder that this is a serious snack food. None of that artificially non-fat crap here. These ain’t Pringles Lite, darlin’. (Although pork rinds are a “no carbs” food, so you Atkins suckers can go hog-wild. Get it? HAR!) One other quality of El Sabroso that probably ought to be mentioned here is that after consuming one or more 1 oz. serving sizes you yourself begin to render fried pork fat, and the gas you pass will most definitely reflect this. Again, no complaints on this score, and in fact, some may consider this a bonus. I know I do – it keeps those hippie vegetarians at bay. * * * * * Snak King – www.snakking.com – Los Angeles, CA Ingredients: Pork rinds, salt. (Fried in rendered pork fat.)

	EL SABROSO - Chorizo Flavored Pork Rinds While some might argue that a sausage-flavored pigskin is about as essential as a french fry-flavored potato chip, I could not resist these red little nuggets. (Nor that smiling swine on the label.) With a tangy aroma and a flavor that’s complex and intriguing, melding the salty with the sweet and blending flavors both natural and artificial, the taste here is actually not too far away from a spicy pork-apple sausage (at least as close as one could hope to come with a chip). The red pepper, slight fruitiness, and hint of clove oil all come together on a base of nicely crisp pigskin that carries a sharp sugary bite that’ll have you reaching for another in an attempt to nail down the elusive flavor. (Or perhaps just to satisfy that growing desire for salt, sugar and MSG that comes with sampling these crimson bits.) Rich and well-rounded, these may be a little too fancy (or “fruity”) for your everyday rind-eater, but are still a welcome variation on the classic treatment. * * * Snak King “King of Snacks” – www.snakking.com – Los Angeles, CA. Ingredients: Fried pork skins, maltodextrin, salt, chili powder, monosodium glutamate, hydrolyzed vegetable protein (corn gluten, soy protein, wheat gluten), yeast extract, sodium diacetate, onion, garlic, soybeanoil, silicon dioxide, paprika, sugar, natural flavor, spices, FD&C Red 40.)

	GUERRERO PORK CRACKLINS These are by far the most toothsome cracklin’s I’ve ever had. I generally avoid these harder little cousins of the pork rind, as the nuggets of fried-out pork fat with attached skin can be deceptively tough – sometimes almost tooth-chippingly so. On top of that the pork fat (which is the real reason for the cracklin’ to live, the pigskin being there only to hold it in place) often resembles something scraped out of a rendering plant’s sludge pot. But Guerrero does the tradition right, serving up popcorn-sized curls of golden skin and fat with that all-important pig flavor baked right into a tender, almost delicate, little nubbin of goodness. And even a saltoholic such as myself will find little need to toss any more table salt into the sack. Perfect with a bowl of Valentina salsa picante for dippin’. !Viva Guerrero! * * * * Distributed by Gruma Corp., Irvine, TX – www.guerrerofoods.com Ingredients: Pork fat with attached skin, salt.

	GUERRERO CHICHARON DE CERDO GOURMET Pork Rinds – Crujientes y Deliciosos April 30, 2013 U.S. Food and Drug Administration 10903 New Hampshire Avenue Silver Spring, MD 20993   RE: Tainted food product To Whom It May Concern:             I am writing to inform you of a breach in quality control and a possible health hazard found in a package of Guerrero brand pork rinds distributed by the Gruma Corporation of Irving, TX.             On April 29 of this year I discovered a foreign object in a package of this product (scans of product label and bag closure/batch ID tag enclosed) purchased at (store), during the week of April 22: this object was a short, coarse, gray hair with split ends. No one visiting my home in the past year has such hair.             I have been eating pork rinds and writing reviews of various brands for nearly 20 years, and never in all that time have I encountered such an egregious violation of health code. I urge you to take whatever steps are appropriate to ensure that Gruma Corporation’s processing plants are up to code and do not pose greater danger to the consumer.             If I am not contacting the appropriate authority about this matter, please either forward this letter and enclosure as appropriate or inform me as to the correct department to contact.             Thank you for your attention to this matter. Sincerely, Tom Crites O

	HOG BOSS Hot Chicharrones Pork Rinds Well, I’m always about to say “Hot Damn!” when coming across a brand new bag of previously undiscovered pork skins. Like Christmas it is…sometimes. These have that enticing aroma of extracts and additives on top of the naturally porky scent of the rinds, but it all don’t entirely add up to much – coulda used a little MSG in here. The rinds are light, easy to eat and moderately tasty, but only moderately. A few of them have that ol’ bottom of the barrel flavor, and this gets more frequent as you reach the bottom of the bag. Pretty much a take-it-or-leave-it brand. But I’ll tell ya, if that Hog Boss ain’t already a comix character, well, he should be. * * Ingredients: Fried pork skins, salt, dextrose, chili pepper, hydrolyzed soy protein, modified food starch, annatto extract (color), paprika, sugar, dehydrated garlic, citric acid, spice extractives. Packed for Garvey Nut & Candy, Pico Rivera, CA

	ISLAND PACIFIC PORK CHICHARON STRIPS - Artificial Vinegar Flavor We’ve gone over the unusual strain of the vinegar-flavored pork rind before, but let’s revisit it again; this is the tangy cousin who sits between the plain and the hot & spicy varieties of the chicharrone. And while there are those sophistos who might find nothing more revolting than a vinegar-soaked strip of pigskin (or an artificially-flavored one), salt, vinegar and the fried pork rind actually go together real well. Particularly here, on the previously unheard-of Island Pacific brand (do they have Hawaiian BBQ flavored pork rinds, I wonder?). The flavoring here may be artificial, but it’s the perfect blend of salt and sour to make your mouth water. Literally – these puppies will jump-start your salivary glands like few other snacks are capable of doing. Especially if you dip ‘em in hot sauce, which makes these tender twisty strips, being puffed up so perfectly light and airy like they are, snap, crackle and pop excitedly as you bite ‘em down. And of course a tang like this can only be countered by a cold one, preferably a dark stout. Hell, they should have bowls of these one bar counters all over the world – beer sales would triple. Lastly, take note of the logo: a happy little swine holding up a bottle of garlic vinegar in an alluring ‘baste me and eat me’ gesture. Now that’s hospitality. * * * Distributed by Island Pacific Distribution, Inc., City of Industry, CA Ingredients: Fried pork rinds, sodium diacetate, monosodium glutamate, salt

	LA REINA CHICHARRONES FRIED PORK RINDS Snack Style Hot & Spicy Tipo Botanero Picante Now these are good. DAMN good. They are indeed hot and spicy, not to mention truly flavorful. Among the rich medley of tastes presented here no single spice stands out, except for the heat which slides in underneath it all for a slow burn that lingers blissfully after the rind is long gone. And they’re nice and salty too, just the way I like ‘em. How good are these rinds? They’re so good, they even taste great with water if you happen to run out of beer. But we both know that ain’t gonna happen. * * * * Distributed by La Reina, Inc., Los Angeles, CA Ingredients: Fried pork rinds, paprika and other spices, salt, hydrolyzed soy protein (6.9%), monosodium glutamate, dextrose, modified food starch, garlic powder, spice extractives including oleoresin paprika, citric acid, disodium inosinate and guanylate, with no more than 2% dioxide as anticaking agent.

	LA REINA CHICHARRONES FRIED PORK RINDS Snack Style Tipo Botanero Regular A big sack does not a grand fried rind make. Kudos to the classic all-natural ingredients, but these rinds come off a little dry and flavorless. Extra salt helped some, lots and lots of extra salt. And the bag did at least come with a single little squeeze-it pouch of tangy La Botanero Clasica Salsa Picante (“!La Mera, Mera!”), although this was more of a spicy vinegar water than a true condiment. So, maybe a fine snack for the movies, as at least you’ll have plenty of salt, but not a particularly top-notch nosh otherwise. Still, I’d wear a t-shirt with the color label on it. * Distributed by La Reina, Inc., Los Angeles, CA Ingredients: Fried pork rinds, salt.

	MAC'S RED HOT CHICHARRONES - Pork Skins Mac’s changed their label recently, so although I’d reviewed their hot rinds some time ago I figured I’d try ‘em out again to see if they changed their recipe as well. And what do you know, it appears that they have. The original spicy Mac’s were a fairly fine rind themselves, what with their heated flavor and crunchy body, and the new Mac’s not only carry these qualities over but add a duskier, smokier flavor to them that better accentuates the warm blend of spices. Which seem to include clove as well as the thirst-inducing chili and salt. And man, are these dogs salty. A little too salty at that, and you will rarely hear me say such a thing. The texture is generally consistent, with most samples being thick puffs fried and coated just right. Also, per the bag, Mac’s is the recipient of the 2005 American Culinary Chef’s Best Taste Award. So give ‘em a try. Just remember, as always, to pick up a bumper or two as well. * * * Manufactured by E.F.P., Chicago, IL – www.macssnacks.com Ingredients: Fried pork rinds, salt, hydrolyzed (soy, corn, wheat) protein, dextrose, corn starch, sugar, chili powder, paprika, annatto extract and citric acid.

	MAC'S CHICHARRONES Well I’ll be goddamned if I didn’t go and misplace all three of the labels for the following rinds. But, you got the reviews and you got the Web links, so that’ll just have to be all right, won’t it?   Jalapeno & Cheddar Pork Skins   Mac’s has apparently expanded their product line, or at least their shipping range. I found a variety of previously unseen (by me, anyway) flavors on sale at a local supermarket, and helped myself to several bags. (Passed on the salt & vinegar variety though, after the multitude sampled during the Philippino Pork Rind Odyssey [see above].) First up is a flavor I’d never even fantasized about: Jalapeno & Cheddar. This sounded more like a potato or tortilla chip combination to me, but the rich jalapeno aroma that arose when I opened the bag had my mouth a-waterin’. And indeed there is a nice peppery flavor to these, with an appropriately warm aftertaste to boot, and they don’t skimp on the cheese powder either: some of these skins are so well coated they almost look like cheese puffs (and they’ll leave your fingers just as orange). The texture of the rinds is a little uneven however, with some of them being unbelievably soft while others are so hard that you really have to work at them; although we’ve seen this discrepancy in other brands, it does show a slight lapse in quality control. At any rate, while I still think this is an unusual style for a pork rind, I also think that this bag ain’t gonna last long around here.   I encourage you to visit www.evansfood.com: “You have found yourself on the premier site of the largest private label pork rind manufacturer on Earth…” As the site itself says, “Hot diggity hog!” Their products (supplied to nearly 20 nations) include Crooked Creek, Hearty Hog and Deli style pork rinds, Pete’s and Deli style pork cracklins, and even “pellets,” the raw material used to make pork rinds and cracklins (with instructions for frying, yet!). “And remember, there is no party without pork rinds.” Damn straight.   * * * Manufacturing by Evans Food Group, Chicago, IL www.evansfood.com Ingredients: Fried pork rinds, and salt. Seasoning: Cheddar, romano and parmesan cheeses (milk, salt, cheese cultures, enzymes), whey powder, salt, jalapeno, natural and artificial flavors, sugar, monosodium glutamate, dextrose, buttermilk solids, butter powder (butter, nonfat milk solids), onion and garlic powders, artificial colors (yellow #5 and yellow #6 lake), spice, and disodium inosinate and disodium guanylate. Contains: Soybean, milk.   -   Salsa Limon Pork Skins   Here’s another flavor that calls to mind chips rather than pork rinds: Salsa Limon. But how can one pass up the opportunity to sample fried pork skin with such flavoring? A spicy, tangy aroma wafts up from the freshly-opened bag, and as with the flavoring it is the citrus that stands out above the salsa. In fact, it rather overpowers the contribution of the other spices entirely, and even the skins themselves. A fruit-flavored pork rind; how…odd. The skins are properly fried and pleasantly crisp, but lemon rind isn’t my idea of an ideal snack so I doubt I’ll be picking up another sack of this variety.   For some interesting, albeit self-proclaimed, examples of Mac’s pork skins standing as a hallmark of quality in the chicharrone arena, go to www.macssnacks.com: “Mac’s Snacks was founded in 1932 and has been producing pork skins and cracklins for over 70 years.” Despite being purchased by Evans Food Products in the Eighties, Mac’s, based in Arlington, TX, is still very much involved in the pigskin game. (No not football, you halfwit.) Check out the “About Us” and the “Products” sections on the Website for extensive and fascinating information about their processes, as well as photographs.   * * Manufacturing by Evans Food Products, Chicago, IL www.macssnacks.com Ingredients: Fried pork rinds, salt added. Salt, vinegar powder (maltodextrin, modified food starch, and vinegar), spices, lime juice solids (corn syrup solids, lime juice, lime oil), sodium diacetate, citric acid, sugar, lemon juice powder (corn syrup solids, lemon juice, lemon oil), garlic powder, lime oil.   -   Salt & Pepper Pork Skins   I expected salt & pepper pork skins to be both saltier and more peppery than these rinds. The skins that received ample flavoring were tasty enough, although this is due more to the garlic and onion tones than that of the “spice (includes pepper),” but a lot of these chicharrones were pretty plain tasting. As has been stated before, there’s nothing wrong with a plain fried pork rind, but if you’re buying for flavor it’s flavor you’ll be looking for. In addition these skins were slightly on the hard side, stout rinds that were more crunchy than crispy; it’s a fine line, and one that hinges on personal preference. Me, I’m not so much a fan of the heartier crack-‘em-up skins, preferring the softer melt-in-your-mouth variety, but again, it’s all up to the consumer (or connoisseur, if you will). To make up for the lack of pepper flavor here I doused some of them with a little hot sauce, Tamazula Extra Hot Mexican Hot Sauce to be precise, and did just fine. On the dusky and tangy, almost dusty and sour side, this shelf-aged blend not only softened these skins up some but managed to bring out the sweeter quality of the flavorings (I’m thinking MSG and perhaps some of them there “natural flavors”) as well as spicing them up temperature-wise. Altogether I can’t find much fault with these, but I can’t find much to recommend them either.   * * Manufactured by Evans Food Products, Chicago, IL www.macssnacks.com Ingredients: Pork rinds, salt, maltodextrin, garlic and onion powders, spice (includes pepper), torula yeast (may contain up to 15ppm sulfites), monosodium glutamate, natural flavors, citric acid * * Distributed by Better Distributing, Clovis, CA Ingredients: Pork cracklins, seasoning (salt, corn flour, monosodium glutamate, spices, paprika, mustard, onion powder, garlic powder, oleoresin of paprika)

	NETHER CHICHARRONES - Old Fashioned Brand Bar-B-Que Smoke Flavored Fried Pork Skins Now these are some serious pigskins: thick chunks of spiced rind, most of which have a slab of juicy fat attached (and I do mean juicy; if you squeeze some of these puppies they literally ooze pig oil). The bar-b-que smoke flavor is a good one, with chili, onion and garlic powders mingling together nicely with the smoke on meaty slices of rind to provide as authentic a BBQ experience as you’re likely to find in a sack. And coming from a skin shop on a Georgia highway you know these ‘rones are made by folks with a true appreciation for the pork rind eatin’ beer drinkin’ man; no mindless conglomerate snack food shill job here. My thanks to rindmeister David Coble at Kobb Labs for hunting down these li’l dogs; I don’t know where he found ‘em but I’m glad he did. * * * Nether’s Pork Skins, Inc., Sylvester, GA Ingredients: Pork skins, salt, spice, paprika, monosodium glutamate, natural mesquite smoke flavor, garlic powder, onion powder.

	NICE! CHICHARRON Pork Skins Well, they smell like pork skins at least, that's a good start. And the crisp on these plain ones is far better than that of the Nice! BBQ variety, giving just the right amount of crackle and give with just enough resistance to make 'em crunch. This pleasing texture is consistent throughout the bag, all the way to the bottom where you might expect to find the tougher little bastards lurking. The taste is very pleasant as well, being very lightly pig-oiled without being greasy. In fact, these are tasty enough to be eaten plain, without any addition from your rack of hot sauces (a rare thing indeed). My one complaint is that there just ain't enough salt on these skins. But we can fix that right now... This is one of those fine brands that you could easily see yourself sitting down with and finishing off the entire 2 oz. sack without even thinking about it. And what do you know, I did just that. I'm surprised; these are actually really quite excellent. Full marks, boys, full marks. (But now I want a “Crispy Porkalicious Goodness!” t-shirt, goddammit...) * * * *  Distributed by Walgreen Co. - www.walgreens.com - Deerfield, IL  Ingredients: Pork skins, salt.

	NICE! CHICHARRON BBQ Flavored Pork Skins “Crispy Porkalicious Goodness!” Well that sounds promising. The first impression however is simply not that...impressive. These have an interesting texture to them: they're not so much crispy as they are crunchy, but it's a crunch more like a tortilla chip somehow than a fried pork skin. And yet not as solid as a cracklin. And “BBQ” flavor is a bit of a stretch, unless you consider tomato powder and sugar to be “BBQ.” The other “spices” are nearly non-existent, and you'll notice the conspicuous absence of any sort of smoke extract among the many ingredients (essential to any form of BBQ). These rinds make me think of the sort of pork skin that might be served at some kind of Midwestern corporate picnic; the kind lots of families show up to with their kids. I'll eat 'em, but I probably wouldn't buy 'em again. * *  Distributed by Walgreen Co., Deerfield, IL  Ingredients: Pork skins, sugar, salt, what flour, monosodium glutamate, dried torula yeast, soy flour, paprika, tomato powder, spices, onion & garlic, extract of paprika, tricalcium phosphate, green bell pepper.

	NOBBY'S PORK CRACKLE - Original Flavour Now this is a treat; King of Australia Dann Lennard posted me a couple packets of my favorite pub fare fresh from Down Under – Nobby’s Pork Crackle. With the “crackle” label I expected these to be a bit on the heavier side, something like our Yankee cracklin’s, but this is a nice little package of crispy hog lumps indeed. Not unlike our down-home pork skins, most of these have a lightly crunchy chip-like texture, the added flour giving them a deep-fried boost. Some of the bottom-of-the-bag samples do have a slightly denser texture, carrying with them a flavor something between fried lard and bacon, but like I say, bottom-of-the-bag. The flavour enhancer (MSG?) and spice extract not only give Nobby’s a unique taste but they make these a most addictive drinking snack indeed. Before I knew it I was at the bottom of my 25g sack. King Dann was thoughtful enough to also provide a bag of Nobby’s Spicy BBQ as well, and I’ll be digging into those in short order. Just as soon as I put on Rupture’s Australia Day and crack open another VB. * * * Smith’s Snackfood Company Ltd., Chatswood, NSW, Australia Ingredients: Pork rind 75%, vegetable oil, salt, wheat flour, hydrolysed vegetable protein, flavour enhancer (621), spice extract.

	NOBBY'S PORK CRACKLE - Spicy BBQ An appetizing smell lifts right up out of the bag upon opening, and the flavor (sorry, flavour) ain’t far behind. Nobby’s Spicy BBQ rinds have a pure and lingering barbecue taste to them, and like the original brand these pig snacks are largely done up crunchy and right. Their taste isn’t quite as distinctive as the secret blend of flavorings of the Original style, but like the Original they’re still good enough to be habit-forming; when I finished the rinds I even ate the crumbs clinging to the crease at the bottom of the sack. Not a pretty picture perhaps, but damn they were tasty. * * * Smith’s Snackfood Company Ltd., Chatswood, NSW, Australia Ingredients: Pork rind 75%, vegetable oil, sugar, flavour enhancer (621), salt, food acids (262, 330), hydrolysed vegetable protein, spices, onion powder, garlic powder, cocoa powder, natural flavours.

	Pepe’s Estilo Casero Chili Limon Dipper Chicharrones Con Grasa – Cracklins The bus broke down under me the other day, so while hoofing it the remaining 20 blocks home I stopped in at a little foreign market I’d never seen before. And sure enough, they stocked a fried skin product that I’d never seen before either. Sporting the longest snack food title I’ve seen yet (as well as other notes of excess, as mentioned below), these are narrow strips of skin and fat about the width of a french fry, coated with an appetizing seasoning blend. The flavor is subtle on the limon and strong on the chili and salt, the tastes coming through in that order and giving you a warm spicy finish. The layer of pork fat here is thin enough not to weld your teeth together, but thick enough to stand up to the flavoring and still allow that bold taste of fried pig to come through in the end. Be forewarned however, these cracklins are extremely crunchy. Some of the little mothers actually hurt. God damn! (Granted, they were purchased within just days of the sell-by date.) And not that it’s particularly important to the folks who eat pork cracklins on a regular basis, by which I mean good wholesome Americans like yourself, but these little ditties carry 105% of your total “daily values” of both saturated fat and sodium in every li’l 3.5oz. bag. Mm-mmm! Now if I could only remember the name of that dicey little hole of a market where I got these… * * Product of Rudolph Foods Co., Dallas, TX Ingredients: Pork fat with attached skin, salt, red pepper and other spices, paprika, citric acid and less than 1% of: dextrose, monosodium glutamate, natural flavors, malic acid, onion powder, tomato powder, sodium diacetate, garlic powder, autolyzed yeast extract, extractives of paprika, lactic acid, disodium inosinate and disodium guanylate.

	ROMERO'S BOTANERO CHICHARRONES - Hot & Spicy Although not a stellar rind by any means, despite the “Crown of Quality” seal, Romero’s is a moderate skin that just might do in a pinch. A garden variety SoCal chicharrone, the uneven texture (there are more than a couple rocky bits in here) and flavoring (largely salt and what tastes like oil of cloves) prevent these from becoming a favorite, but hey, pork rinds are pork rinds, and when you gotta have ‘em, you gotta have ‘em. The fact that the only place I’ve seen this particular brand is at Wal-Mart might tell you a bit about the brand’s intended demographic and accompanying level of quality control. Romero also produces a plain, or “Original” style rind (ingredients: fried pork rinds, salt added), and while these are fairly uniform and crispy in texture, with a fair salt level, they’re fairly bland man, fairly bland. * * Romero’s Food Products, Inc., Santa Fe Springs, CA Ingredients: Fried pork rinds, salt added, dextrose, salt, modified food starch, chili pepper, hydrolyzed soybean protein, paprika, annatto color, sugar, dehydrated garlic, citric acid, spice extractives and Red #40 Lake.

	Romero’s Botanero Chicharrones Pork Cracklins – Tipo Carnita – Fried Out Pork Fat with Attached Skin This looks like a serious servin’ of cracklins: 8oz. worth of thick fried pig husk tucked into a butchers counter-style Styrofoam tray. And serious they are; these crunchy nuggets of skin with a rich layer of fat adhering to them are solid but short of rocky, and although a little light in the salt department this is shortage that is easily remedied. The two 1oz. salsa packets included are indeed more salsa than hot sauce, being tomato-based and thick with onion and jalapeno, and while a vinegar-based hot sauce actually goes better with these cracklins it’s good to see that Romero’s isn’t skimping here. And if you can find these at one of those mega-stores you can get them for about two bucks cheaper than you’ll find at your local grocery. * * * Distributed by Romero’s Food Products, Inc., Santa Fe Springs, CA Ingredients: Fried out pork fat with attached skin, salt (salsa packets included)

	Sabor Hispano Chicharron Delgado Fried Out Pork Rinds Found these puppies in, of all places, the baked goods section of Vons. And from the packaging alone you can tell that the good people at Hispanic Flavor take their rinds seriously – this is a big sack, meant to carry a big skin. And check out their unique bag closure system: an actual metal clamp pinching the bag closed – no flimsy twist-tie here, nothing you can open with your fingers at all, this is something you actually have to cut off. Which is their guarantee that the rinds will stay fresh and crisp until their posted sell-by date, well over a month away (another one-up on other brands that offer large fresh-looking rinds but neglect to indicate a freshness date). The only two ingredients are the only ones you need, and, well, just look at those behemoth rinds in there. All of which makes it all the more sorrowful that these simply are not excellent chicharrones. Yes, they are big, and yes they have an appropriately bold crunch that, in most cases, is solid and satisfying without being tooth-cracking. But the flavor is…largely absent. That most essential imbuement of rich hog oil is lacking here. And not only do these not have the salt content to make up for the dearth of taste, but they’re so dry and well-processed that, should you salt them yourself as I tried to do, the salt just won’t stick. It’s almost as if these have been rendered too finely; instead of some soft MSG & BBQ powder-laden lunchbag tuck, these are full no-nonsense survival rinds that would probably be good months after the sticker date. And I salute them for that. But buy another big-ass bag? Probably not. Still, given the random quality of the rinds floating around out there, you’d be fortunate to find these available as you could definitely do much worse. (You can also find Seasoned Pork Rinds in Brine on the Sabor Hispano Website, below). * * Ingredients: Pork skins and salt. Manufactured by Sabor Hispano – City of Vernon, CA http://saborhispanofoods.com/index.html

	SHIRAKIKU BRAND BOH KUN HABANERO TOHATO POTATO SNACK A friend picked these up for me at the Ebisu Supermarket, knowing I’d appreciate the packaging and habanero flavor. Inside the festive Halloween wrapper rests a more than adequate 1.94 ounce serving of little orange potato rings, which at first bite have a potato-like Funyun flavor. This quickly grows hot upon the palate however, a sensation which continues to spread even after you’ve swallowed the snacks. These are some spicy little orange potato rings! With a potato base that’s misleadingly hearty despite their small size, these aren’t as light and crispy as one might believe, but are still some most noshable snacks for those with a taste for the fiery. I could have used an ice-cold Sapporo to wash these down with, but Pabst Blue Ribbon did the job nicely. Here’s hoping Shirakiku comes through with a Black Pepper Kobe Beef Onion Ring Snack sometime in the near future . . . * * * Nishimoto Trading Co., Ltd., Kobe, Japan. Ingredients: Potato, palm oil, potato starch, spice, salt, sugar, glucose, hydrolyzed pork protein, onion powder, chicken extract, yeast powder, lactose, habanero hot pepper sauce, monosodium glutamate, artificial flavor, paprika coloring, tocopherol, spice extract, citric acid, caramel coloring.

	SI SENIOR PORK CRACKLINS Chicharrones Now this is an impressive package: a full eight ounces of cracklin pork goodness packed into a Styrofoam butcher's tray. I tried a smaller bag of these some time ago (see below) and was less than impressed, but this more than makes up for it. The just-right combination of crispy skin and buttery fat, all touched with a bit of salt...if you like the cracklin, you will like these, guaranteed. Just be sure and get the big one, and by all means, check your sell-by date, people! And when they say “Con Tapatio” they are not fucking around: not one, not two, but three little squeeze pouches of the popular hot sauce are packed inside with the rinds. Good things here. (Just don't get the wise idea of trying to ladle some spicy black bean Cuban stew over them and microwaving the bowl; they get a little gummy...) * * *  Distributed by Senor Snacks, Inc., Los Angeles, CA  Ingredients: Pork fat with attached skin, salt.

	Si Senior Pork Cracklins Chicharrones Con Salsa I can’t remember if I’ve tried Si Senior’s cracklins before, but either way I’m havin’ ‘em now. And they are not tremendous. Somewhat overcooked, these chicharrones are fried beyond the ideal golden hue right into the brown, which not only gives them a distinctly overdone taste but also hardens the fat, often rendering it a muddier reminder of the once-juicy trove of hog butter nestled within these curls. In short, less than excellent. They do come with a packet of Tapatio Salsa Picante however, which is always a welcome addition. Especially in this case, as I had to suck the last drops out of the pack in order to get rid of the dirty fried taste lingering on my palate. O Distributed by Senor Snacks, Inc., Los Angeles, CA Ingredients: Pork fat with attached skin, salt Salsa packet: Water, red peppers, salt, spices, acetic acid, garlic, xanthan gum, sodium benzoate

	SI SENOR - Hot & Spicy Pork Rinds With the ad line “El Snack #1 de los Hispanos” I was immediately skeptical, especially as these chicharrones looked suspiciously like any other mildly-flavored Styrofoam pork ‘treat’ mass-produced by some junk food conglomerate. (Si Senor and its sister brand, La Abeja, both operate under the Senor Snacks, Inc. umbrella.) But 50 million illegal immigrants can’t be wrong, so I went ahead on and tried a sack of these hot and spicy hog strips. And happily this is a tasty brand indeed as the spice factor prevails, the flavoring thickly coating finely crisped pigskins in a tasty combination that, while favoring the heat, yields a deliciously complex taste. There’s even a balancing hint of sweetness, although sugar is not listed as an ingredient. I’m sold – Si Senor! * * * * Distributed by Senor Snacks, Inc., Los Angeles, CA Ingredients: Pork rinds, salt, dextrose, spices including chili pepper, torula yeast, maltodextrin, paprika, monosodium glutamate, onion powder, garlic powder, extractives of paparika, Yellow #6 Lake, natural flavor, caramel color, and Red 40 Lake.

	SI SENOR PORK RINDS (Regular) A solidly plain rind. Needs more salt and hot sauce, but the stout crispy skins have got that tasty pig flavor that you just gotta have if you’re into fried hogskin. I’ll buy ‘em again. * * * Distributed by Senor Snacks, Inc., Los Angeles, CA Ingredients: Pork rinds, salt.

	SNAK KING PORK RINDS - Spiced with Tabasco Brand Seasoning Snak King makes a fine rind (they being the “King of Snacks” behind the El Sabroso line of pork skins), so anything under their label is easily worth trying. I’d never heard of Tabasco-flavored rinds before however, so was a mite curious as to how they’d pan out. And they’re pretty damn good; can’t say as how I really taste Tabasco, as these aren’t as hot and vinegar-laden as the condiment itself, but they certainly do possess a flavorful tang thanks to the pepper and vegetable powders. They’re really more sweet than hot, but do have a pleasant warmth that just calls out to be quenched by a cold one. Plenty of which were available at BevMo, which is where I scored this tasty sack. * * * Snak King “King of Snacks” – www.snakking.com – Los Angeles, CA. Ingredients: Pork rinds, salt, maltodextrin, Tabasco Brand dry red flavoring (red pepper, vinegar, salt), vinegar flavor (lactose, malic acid, acetic acid), red bell pepper powder, onion powder, garlic powder, sugar, citric acid, red pepper, paprika, caramel color, FD&C Yellow #5 Lake, FD&C Red #40 Lake.

	Sword Fish Brand Fried Pork Rinds Now this here is what I like to see: an oversize bag filled top to bottom with one big-ass pork rind. Hell, they even had to fold over the top part and crack it off to make it fit. I’m always a little skeptical of a pork skin bag sealed with a twist-tie, but in this case I exercised the third test of freshness, taking hold of a corner of the rind through the bag to see if it snapped off sharp-like. And it did. This rind is still a little stiff (no sell-by date), but still plenty easy to bust apart into bite-sized pieces. And it is one fine big-ass pork rind indeed. The pig skin flavor is perfectly subtle but still right there, and the very light addition of salt and MSG makes this downright addictive. Finger lickin’ good, even. Thought I’d need some hot sauce for this one, but it actually tastes better without. In fact I literally had to force myself to stop eating it to close the bag so I’d have some left for later. * * * * Packed for K&M Trading, Inc., City of Industry, CA Ingredients: Fried pork rinds, monosodium glutamate, and salt added

	TOHATO BOKUN HABANERO - Baked Potato Crackers All right, so they ain’t pigskin, but they are damn strange. And tasty, too, which is why they bear mention. The friends who picked these up warned me that they were past there sell-by date, and with their formidable list of ingredients might be a bit dangerous. The ingredients actually sounded more hazardous, as anything combining habanero pepper with powdered durian fruit is a food item worthy of respect. Throw in the shrimp and coconut milk and hell, it sounds like a Fiji mermaid in a sack! And there is indeed a whiff of the briny deep rising from the depths of the bag upon opening, although it is none too overpowering or off-putting. Although very hot and spicy indeed, these little sphincter rings don’t pull the full frontal freakshow on your tongue that you might expect. The promise of durian lifted the expectations high, but alas there is no sweet rotten foot flavor to be found herein. I can’t believe I actually logged that as a complaint. At any rate, they’re hot, they’re crunchy, and they’re fucking weird. Make sure you pick up an equally unique alcoholic drink to match. Points too for the double spice in the ingredients (although check out all the sweeteners they use). Also check out the Website link below – just see if you can figure that out! * * * Exported by Kawa Corporation, Kobe, Japan – www.tohato.jp Ingredients: Potato, soybean oil, potato starch, shrimp, spice, glucose, tomato, spice, onion powder, wheat flour, soy protein, coconut milk, apple juice, sugar, hydrolyzed soy protein, dextrin, durian powder, citric acid.

	TOM'S HOT PORK SKINS CHICHARRONES Smoked with Natural Hardwood I found a pair of Tom’s Hot Pork Skin varieties at the same rest stop in Georgia and figured I’d try ‘em out and see how they stacked up. After all, they did have my name on ‘em. The first sack I tore into was the “Smoked” variety, and while they do have a definite warmth to them I’m not getting a lot of smoke flavor. There’s actually a significant sweetness underneath the chili pepper, which does meld will with the hearty crunch of the fried skins. A good solid rind, well worth the $0.99. And I dare you to get a tattoo of the sweaty little piggy mascot on the label. Regarding the simple Hot Pork Skins Chicharrones, while I wrote down the ingredients I didn’t bother to keep the sack or come up with a review, leaving me to believe they simply weren’t that great. Certainly not that memorable. Try the Smoked variety if you can get ‘em. * * * Tom’s Snacks Co., Charlotte, NC – www.toms-snacks.com Ingredients: Pork rinds, salt, dextrose, spices including chili pepper, torula yeast, maltodextrin, paprika, monosodium glutamate, onion powder, extractives of paprika, Yellow #6 Lake, natural flavor, caramel color, Red #40 Lake.

	Tropics ‘Philippine Style’ Chicharron (Kawali) Artificial Vinegar Flavored Fried Pork Rinds Ah, the salt & vinegar pork rind: popular in Asian communities, one can see these being equally favored in an English pub. Kind of like what you might imagine a fried pickled pork rind to taste like. Tart and salty, these are very easy to eat, ideally matched to your malt beverage of choice. If they’re fried properly. These are not: they’re fried perfectly. Puffy enough to be crisp, solid enough to be crunchy, there’s no middle road leading on a detour to unpleasantness here. Vinegar-based hot sauce perhaps makes these a little heavy on the tang, so if that’s not what you’re looking for try dipping them in Mae Ploy Sweet Chili Sauce (Theppadungporn Coconut Co., Ltd., Thailand). As Clint Howard says in Ticks, “Top notch!” * * * * Distributed by Philippine Foodtrade Corp., Commerce, CA / Foodasia Int’l Corp., S.S.F., CA www.tropicsfoods.com Ingredients: Fried pork rinds, sodium diacetate, monosodium glutamate, salt

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