The Goodness of Conjugal Love
Conjugal love is, after all, a part of God's good creation (Genesis 1:28; 31). Like all creatures, marital relations image transcendent realities. Seen through the eyes of the spirit, physical attractiveness reflects the Divine Beauty, romantic love images the love between God and humanity. Sexual desire is intended to be an "icon", so to speak, of our longing for God, arousal signifies desire for union with our Creator. Pleasure is the physical counterpart of joy, while orgasm images mystical ecstasy.
Though the spiritual originals are "higher" than their physical images, that does not mean the latter are "bad". If marital love is a dynamic icon of the Christ/Church union, then hatred of sex is a form of "iconoclasm". As the seventh century iconoclasts were wrong to despise icons of Christ and the saints made with human hands, so it would be wrong for us to despise sex, the God-made "icon" of Christ's union with the Church. Such an attitude is incompatable with a sacramental view of the universe.
Conjugal Love mirrors Spirituality
Some seem to have difficulty seeing this connection between human sexuality and spirituality. This is expecially evident in the varying interpretations of the Canticle of Canticles (ie. Song of Songs). Many past writers have viewed the Canticle as a pure allegory or parable, entirely symbolic of God/Christ's relationship with Israel/the Church. Another school of thought insists on a purely literal reading - that this is a divinely inspired love poem extolling God's ideal plan for marriage, with no symbolic significance whatsoever.
Could there be an element of truth to both of these interpretations? Perhaps the Canticle of Canticles, by mystically portraying Christ's love for His Bride in terms of a marital relationship, also presents the divine ideal for human marriage. After all, human conjugal relations are themselves an allegory of the Christ-Church union, which is higher and more perfect. So a divinely inspired poem portraying the transcendent union of the New Adam and Eve in terms of an ideal marriage will certainly provide us with insight into what God intends human marriage to be, at its best.
Some espousing the allegorical view seem to believe the book can only have a higher, symbolic significance because it is inspired by God (the unspoken attitude seems to be "Why would the Spirit ever inspire someone to write about sex?"). And some of the "literalist" interpreters seem unable to see how such erotic imagery could have any spiritual significance. Both of these views reflect a profound ambivalence toward the relationship of sexuality with spirituality. I believe that we can begin to heal this rift by seeing the powerful eroticism in the Song both as an extolling of marital love and a mystical image of God's infinitely passionate love for us.
The goodness of the heavenly original affirms the goodness of its physical counterpart. Thus earthly marriage and conjugal relations are essentially good, as is mystical marriage and union with God. In Catholicism, the latter two are often (but not exclusively) sought through consecrated virginity. The nun gives up marriage and sex for union with her Divine Bridegroom and the priest gives them up to serve the Church, his mystical "Bride". Properly understood, celibacy is not the rejection of a bad thing for a good thing, but the sacrifice of a good thing for a higher goal; of a symbol for its original.
Herein lies the paradox: consecrated virginity actually affirms the goodness of human sexuality and conjugal relations. Jesus Christ never had intercourse on earth, nor does He have literal physical coitus with Holy Mother Church (an impossibility!). Yet that does not diminish the fact that marital lovemaking on earth images their heavenly union. Even so, though Mary is Ever-Virgin, her intimate union with God and His infinite love for her are the heavenly originals of sexual union here on earth.
Gazing on her Divine Bridegroom, rapt in joyful ecstasy, Mary enjoys the unitive bliss of which a physical climax is only a hint and foreshadowing. Her passionate love for God is reflected in the eyes of every earthly bride as she gazes on her new husband on their wedding night. Her perpetual virginity does not leave her cold and loveless, for she is consumed with a Divine Love that is stronger than death, with a passion relentless as the grave, whose "flames are a blazing fire, the very flame of the Lord" (Canticle of Canticles 8:6).
Conclusion
The image of the Bride of God - whether manifested in Bat Zion, Ecclesia or Mary - calls us to rejoice in the gift of sexuality and to use it for God's glory. It shows that God does not hate sex, since He uses it as a symbol of His relationship with His people. We see examples of this in Ezekiel's depiction of God "making love" to Israel (16:8-9), or Olier's statement that the God the Father loves Mary as a spouse (17), or Saint Paul's comparison of the Christ-Church union to the one flesh union of a married couple (Ephesians 5:30-31) or the parallel between the Spirit-Mary relationship and the unitive and procreative aspects of marriage. Hopefully, we can use this knowledge as a basis for a holistic and truly Christian perception of God's great gift of sexuality.
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