The Inadequate Lampshade
__________________________
at the beginning, we simply wanted
a new start in the world
to get away from the usual
high-rise apartment. and so we
launched ourselves into the suburbs
got a house with a real yard
and inch by inch we undertook
the slow and unnatural process of
filling the place with furniture.
it was a battle against the empty rooms;
we tried to leverage our suitable furniture
with simple, low-cost adjustments
getting a fourth leg for Aunt Emma's couch
turning an old drum into an end table
finding a new shade for an old brass floorlamp.
that shade had so many incarnations
replaced with those from other lamps
this one too short, that one too modern
finally we tried for an improvised
(we thought artsy) version
made from wire loops and wrapping paper
almost chic, but seemingly inadequate
to the task of providing us with
the cover of adulthood --
somehow the seams were always visible
and no march of dining room chairs
mirrors and bookcases could
quite overcome its unrepentant tilt
hinting at dorm rooms past and
stubbornly refusing to pose for company.
that lamp betrayed the extent to which
our new existence was patched-together
how easily a slight push might
split the seam, leaving the frame exposed.
maybe we should have given in then
seen the sun-dappled cardboard for what it was;
it would have saved us so many years
of struggling to hold things together.
-acm (7/98)