John Kerry:  
A Beatlist's Dream President

Throughout the history of human civilization, politics and religion have made for strange bedfellows.  It is with full understanding of this ignoble tradition that the Temple of Beatlism now launches headlong into the political arena.  We have decided to announce that John Kerry is the Church's one and only candidate of choice for the upcoming presidential race.  We endorse Kerry not only because he happens to have the first name John, or because he says he listens to Abbey Road all the time, or even for his first-rate choice of photo-ops.  No, Kerry is our choice for president because we believe he has a shot at beating the incumbent president George W. Bush.  For all his talk about being a religious man, George W. has done precious little to benefit those of us in the Beatlist faith over the past four years of his administration's reign.  And while we can't hold W directly responsible for the death of a certain other George during his time in office, it seems clear that this president's values do not reflect those of any Beatles, Inner or real.  If anything, the current president is a walking embodiment of the Inner Ringo, and yet he seems to carry himself with a sense of self-importance that would make Paul McCartney blush - clearly, he is not a man on the road to embeatlement.  Kerry, on the other hand, might just be such a man.  So, please join us in supporting Kerry's bid for the White House.  Perhaps he can be the man to lead this country out of this fractious Inner Yoko mode of war and paranoia, and into a new era of an Inner George Martin, where collaboration and harmony are once again a part of our national fabric.  Register and vote, yo!