The Apocryphal Books
One of the most hotly debated topics among adherents to the Beatlist faith
deals with the books in the holy text that are known as "the Apocrypha".
In these passages, a story is spun that in no way fits with the Beatles-related
tradition promoted in the rest of the text. It tells of four young
musicians, their mercurial rise to superstardom, their hit TV series, and
the zany antics that ensued. They have four distinct personalities,
and seem attracted and repelled by one another within the band. However,
the young men described in this apocryphal book seems devoid of content,
as if the Inner Beatles have been dispossessed of their essence, and replaced
by some shell that resembled the original, with no passion or soul behind
it. Many have suggested that another group or groups were the original
stars of this story, and their names simply were scratched out and replaced
with John, George, Paul, and Ringo, maybe as some sort of practical joke.
Who are these talentless posers who appear in the guise of the true Inner
Beatle in this holiest of texts?
Some have proposed that the Apocrypha represent an alternative state
of the Inner Beatles, but these members of the church also adhere to the
contentious "The Inner Paul Is Dead" point of view. Others have suggested
that the apocryphal texts be stricken from the holy book in order to remove
from the religion the very image of these four young scamps in Beatles
clothing. As the church debates the authenticity of these sections
of the Beatle Bible, Beatlists continue to look to the original Beatles
story as a guidepost for understanding their inner self. It is the
True Inner Beatles that have led to the church's explosive popularity in
a country plagued by doubts and insecurity. Reading and hearing the
story and works of the Beatles will always remain the true path to embeatlement.
As one recent convert announced at a service, "Now I'm a believer!"
The Apocrypha will continue to puzzle Beatlists until definitive evidence
can establish the etiology of this bizarre chapter.
RETURN to MAIN page