Wildly successful young stockbroker Morton Mirmelstein has suddenly left New York for parts unknown, leaving his secretary, Gina Blandleigh, to look after his cat, Maynard. This has given Gina an idea: She and her mild-mannered husband, Harold, will pretend to live in Morton's home for one evening. This will provide the right atmosphere for Gina's latest scheme, which is to convince the famous Russian pianist Yevtuslav Rostronitzin to perform at a benefit concert for the Flushing Philharmonic, the struggling orchestra in which Harold plays viola. Trading on an old love affair between Rostronitzin and Gina's great aunt, Gina invites the maestro to dinner. When the notorious recluse hesitates, she lets drop that Lord Cecil Ramsbottom, the famous impresario, will also be attending. This is a lie - Gina and Harold don't even know Ramsbottom - but he is a client of Morton's, and Gina figures that she can explain his nonappearance somehow. As the play begins, Gina and Harold are arriving at the opulent Mirmelstein brownstone to prepare to meet their illustrious guest.
Unfortunately, something always goes wrong with Gina's schemes,
and tonight the something is everything. Unbeknownst to Gina and
Harold, Malcolm and Mimi Mirmelstein, Morton's parents,
have decided to drop by his home that evening. Before he left
town Morton said that he had something very important to tell
them and they are concerned that he has been acting "strangely"
lately. Also, Morton's estranged lover, Max Morgenstern,
is on his way over to discuss the results of his medical test.
With these unexpected appearances looming, the pompous Rostronitzin
arrives early. He's a lecher who turns out to be more interested
in Gina than in charity. During one of Rostronitzin's attempts
at seduction, Maynard - enormous and ill-tempered - destroys a
priceless work of art and then escapes through an open window.
When Gina and Harold go out to look for him, Morton's parents
show up. Rostronitzin believes that the Mirmelsteins are Harold's
parents (after all, they explain that their son lives there),
while the parents in turn are convinced that the strange Russian
gentleman at their son's home is a missionary trying to convert
Morton from Judaism to Christianity (after all, Rostronitzin has
assumed a false identity because he doesn't like to be recognized).
Max arrives later and also falls into the confusion of identity,
taking Rostronitzin first for a romantic rival, and then for a
missionary attempting to turn Morton "straight."
In this dense web of farcical deception, Harold has to pretend
to be the Mirmelsteins' son to Rostronitzin, while being Harold
to the Mirmelsteins and Max; Gina has to keep Rostronitzin at
bay without alienating him; Max, unsure whether Morton's parents
know about his orientation, has to hide the nature of his relationship
with their son; Harold and Gina have to make their pitch to Rostronitzin,
and they have to recapture that damn cat - which keeps reappearing
- without Mimi, Malcolm or Max realizing that Maynard is missing!
By the play's end, everyone's pretenses are stripped away. All
hope for each is lost - then found again. And the main characters
emerge a bit changed for the better. In addition, the mystery
of why Morton left town is cleared up, Maynard proves himself
a resourceful tyrant, and we unexpectedly learn how Cecil Ramsbottom
spent his evening.