The woman who lives in fear of a strong, irritable man who expresses his anger frequently, and cannot break out of her fear, is living in a kind of third world country with an alpha male and learned to be a COOLIE to keep the BOSS from yelling or punching her. Imagine for the sake of argument, that she’s a harem bride in NIGERIA or ASIA. Her fathers have sold her virginity to the highest bidder and she’s up shit canal without a paddle, now! There’s no going back home to daddy in countries where virginity is equivalent to a female’s entire value.
In the Western world, other thoughts keep this woman helpless. If there are children, our unhappy bride is perhaps afraid that she couldn’t support the family without him. She may on an unconscious level, sense that he’s the kind of potentially VERY VIOLENT man who --- when a woman departs with his kids,-- does an OJ and shoots her or worse, shoots the kids! We have so many in the news lately. The woman starts divorce proceedings, he shoots her dead in a street outside her office where she’s already working to pay for half their life. Then he goes after the children. And you know, it’s illegal to leave the state with the children. My friend Catherine had two infants, one at the breast,with a man who punched her around, threw her down stairs. She left, drove 3,000 miles. She made the mistake of phoning him, he put her in jail for a year, for kidnapping, got the two kids legally taken away from her permanently.
Another mistake a fleeing woman might do would be using her own social security number to work. They would find her easily. If you run with children, you must be prepared to clean houses the rest of your life, no social security at all. You have gone underground, for thel8 years it takes to raise them.
SO running is not an option. You must file charges, have photos of bruises, witnesses and throw yourself on the mercy of the court. Too often, courts can do nothing. The woman gets shot anyway. OJ and Blake got away with those murders, too.
So what we see is that the brutalized woman did not know what he was before she married him. And too late, she finds that her hubby is a little undeveloped in the spiritual way of things. He’s the way men have been for thousands of years. Millions of years maybe. It was burnt into his genes by his ancestors, and into his brain by growing up with the father HE had and into his flesh by the hormone testosterone raging around his adrenals.
If he’s a yeller, screamer, insecure, jealous, pushing his nose into his wife’s email, he’s fearful another man might EMAIL her. (Why the very word makes them see red. GAD ferbid she should get a friendly E-MALE!) In this snoopy hubby case HOWEVER, this unsteady character loves her in his twisted, primitive atavistic fashion. Though his children’s genes are polluted with an ancestry of rage, the mother’s kind way might stand in their memory as a kind of example of pushing the dust under the rug.
Some might survive with their father’s manners in their memory and NEVER have and manners themselves. If there are sons, some might grow up to give dad a piece of their mind. They might end up making perfectly fine husbands themselves out of horror at what a man did to Mom. There is a karma here. The sons born to such a father probably had a soul life earlier where they were beefy testosterone casualties themselves so watching a man wipe up a floor with Mom is their karmic payment.
We can’t know. Remember the law, it’s perfect. Trust that fact. It’s part of the plan, the genetic evolution of a gadzillion soul coil, a braid of life. And when the alpha males blow up this solar system, this soul-coil will move across black space and find another LIFE cluster out at Beta-Sagittarrii-29 and embed itself in life there.
Maybe in that cosmos the WOMEN will beat up the men. Well it sure could be the case if God has a sense of humor. And She must!
But that brings us back to what you can do if you are continually brutalized. First, take photos of every bruise. Take a pawn shop 35 mm camera to your gal pal the next day when bruises are really ugly, have her photo you in bright sunlight! Body shots, whatever. All these photos must be kept at gal pal’s house. GAD FORBID the FIST finds them!
NEXT, study. Prepare for your disappearance from his life. DOWNLOAD MAVIS BEACON typing software, free online. Google up that name Plus FREE. After you can touch type l00 words per minute, take a semester of LEGAL SECRETARY courses.
That is a 25$ an hour job and you will be surrounded by friendly lawyers for life. You can fight the bastard and never pay a cent! He will never have enough money to beat you and your legal staff. You will have a DREAM TEAM. You must get the legal right to have full custody with supervised visits for him, because of his violence. YOU NEED much evidence to pull off the categorizing him as a violent man.
When you have the job, you save all salaries until you have the 3 thousand dollars it will take to move, rent a flat, moving trucks. I used U-Hauil, 19$ a day. I rented it all week long, made 2 trips a day, full. Using park homeless guys. Sat/Sun they wanted more money for truck, so I didn’t move on weekend. 500$ salaries for the men and 100$ for the truck, but mind you, I moved every plant, tree, stone and all the soil in the garden in barrels. I could have done the furniture in one day.