I'm running late, but
remember you still have time to get your tickets
for the benefit I'm putting
together for the Pasadena Hockey Assoc. on
Friday Nov. 12th.
Today Birthday wishes
go out to Christine "I going for the watch" Cleary
of AMI Metals in Fontana,
Ca. Christine also just got engaged, so she
has a lot to celebrate.
Hey CC, we need a Scorpio party. Haven't had one
in a few years. Happy
Birthday.
Today's first joke was
sent in by Jeremy Dillard of Pasadena, Ca. or is
it still Las Vegas? Our
next joke was sent in by Lisa Conrad-Underwood
of the The Ohio Travel
Pavilion in Columbus, Ohio.
AND, Today we have
a bonus joke that I got from my son, Sean.
Let's make this a Wonderful
Wednesday
With Love,
Namaste'
Joe
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A brunette, redhead,
and a blonde went to a fitness spa for some fun and
relaxation. After
a stimulating healthy lunch, all three decided to
visit the ladies room
and found a strange-looking woman sitting at the
entrance who said, "Welcome
to the ladies room. Be sure to check out our
newest feature: a mirror
which, if you look into it and say something
truthful, you will be
awarded with a wish.
But, be warned, for if
you say something false, you will be sucked into
the mirror to live in
a void
of nothingness for all
eternity!"
The three women quickly
entered and upon finding the mirror, the
brunette said, "I think
I'm the most beautiful of us three" and in an instant she
was surrounded by a pile
of money.
The redhead stepped up
and said "I think I'm the most talented of us
three" and she suddenly
found the keys to a brand new Lexus in her
hands.
Excited over the possibility
of having a wish come true, the blonde
looked into the mirror
and said, "I think..." and 'POOF' she was
promptly sucked into
the mirror.
It's a troubled day in
heaven. God summons St. Peter and says, "we
have a problem.
Heaven is full. However, we have a number of high
profile candidates waiting
at the gates, and we are suffering from falling
popularity. So,
I'm going to throw out Mother Teresa and let in one of
the celebrities at the
gate. You'll have to go and decide who is most
suitable."
St. Peter goes down to
the pearly gates and finds Freddie Mercury,
Gianni Versacci and Princess
Di waiting for him.
He says, "I'm afraid I
can only let one of you in, so each of you
must come up with a reason
for admission into heaven."
Freddie says, "I've been
gifted with one of the most beautiful
voices to ever grace
the earth. I'll spend my time in heaven singing
praises to God with the
choirs of angels. Heaven will never have sounded better."
Gianni says, "I was earth's
greatest designer. I will outfit the
cherubs and angels in
all the latest fashions. Long silky gowns, satin
cloaks and nightwear
spun from the very clouds we stand on.
Heaven will never have
looked better."
Diana blushes a little,
looks around nervously and seems unable to
find something suitable
to say. Suddenly, she strips off her skirt and
panties, whips out a
bottle of Perrier, shakes it up and douches with
it.
St. Peter says, "Ok, Diana, you may enter. Have a nice day!"
Freddie and Gianni are
mortified. "What's going on here?? We could
make heaven look and
sound better than ever before, and she performs a
disgusting, pornographic
act, but she gets in and we don't!!!"
St. Peter just shrugs
his shoulders and says, "Sorry guys, but a
royal flush beats a pair
of queens any day."
Bonus Joke from Sean Conrad
What do you get when you play a country song back wards???
You get your dog back,
you get your house back, you get your wife back,
you get your car back
ect. ect.
The psalmist says, "I
will lift up mine eyes to the hills from whence
cometh my strength."
Psalm 121:1. Spiritual strength comes from that
level of thinking, because
you receive ideas and resources to sustain
you. Further, when you
achieve the level of true knowing, you recognize
you are not alone in
the world. Whatever challenge you face is puny
compared to the power
that is God.
- Rev. Mary Mannin Morrissey