Househunting a/k/a Buddy Can You Spare $100,000

If

you know anything about the real estate market, specifically the Los Angeles real estate market, you know what a dump its taken since its glory days back in 1989. Typically, if you bought back then (note the kick me sign on my back) your property is worth somewhere between 20% to 40% less than what you paid for it. Which means if you put down 20% as a downpayment, you can kiss that goodbye and may very likely have to write a check in order to sell your house. Enter yours truly. Rumor has it that the beating your taking on the sale can be offset by the millions your gonna make when the depreciated property you buy today appreciates at warp speed just like in the go-go 80's. So... I buy into the rhetoric, put my house on the market, which gives me the opportunity to write a check to the bank, for how much I wont say, and begin the search for the next black hole thats gonna take me down once and for all. I must stress that the house Im in as I write this is perfectly fine. In fact its a way kewl house. Bright, colorful, well layed out, very hip. The only reason I put it on the market, and it was half as a goof just to see what its worth (ie:how much I lost), was the street that Im on which is a little too trafficy for my taste. I figure that given the depressed market I could find something nirvanalike in the middle of Santa Monica National Forrest for not too much more dough. Yeah, right. Reality check. You cant buy shit in Los Angeles unless grandma dies and leaves you a sizeable trust fund. Which is not how this story ends. Im gonna be homeless at the end of the summer, walking the streets mumbling about the beautiful home I had to write a check to sell only to end up living in a refrigerator box on the Santa Monica freeway Lincoln Blvd offramp. Thats how the story ends.