|
Q: How do I get an agent?
A: Write better.
Okay, that was a cheap shot. Mostly. But the question of how to get an agent is very like the question of how to get to
Carnegie Hall, and deserves an equivalent answer.
The plain truth is, 99% of you will start looking for an agent too soon. How do I know? Because I was a mealy-mouthed
young novelist once, and I looked too soon. I understand the desire to share your precious talent with the world. And if "the
world" is your mother, go for it! If by "the world" you mean an agent, not so fast.
Here is an agent's Dream New Writer Experience. To the degree that your story varies from this, you are in trouble:
Mr. Agent gets a call from a Top Client. This is an actor, director, or writer who is working and making Big Money for
Mr. Agent. Top Client says I have this friend who has been writing screenplays for a couple of years and has one I think you
should read. Mr. Agent says okay, and New Writer mails the script in to Big Agency. Mr. Agent's Trusted Assistant reads it
and says Top Client is right-- this script is great. Mr. Agent takes it home that weekend at the bottom of a pile of a dozen
other scripts from around town that he's supposed to read before the Monday meeting. New Writer's script is last priority,
of course.
On Sunday night, after dinner and half a bottle of pinot noir, Mr. Agent sits down with his stack of screenplays. The
cull is swift and cruel. By the time he gets to New Writer's script it's after midnight. He flips through it. Okay, looks
like a screenplay. Not too long. He reads the first page. And looks up from page 110 an hour and a half later a very, very
happy agent. It is good. Better, it might sell. It is very commercial. It's a spec in agentspeak, which is a much narrower
definition than it is in writerspeak.
Mr. Agent likely then must convince several of his fellow agents at Big Agency that New Writer has potential. The script
goes to other agents or other agents' assistants to be read and the process starts all over again. If other agents can't be
convinced that New Writer is worth the effort, Mr. Agent may have to say thanks-but-no-thanks. Or he might be able to hip-pocket
the client (represent him unofficially and on his own time) and help New Writer without the support of Big Agency. If something
good happens for New Writer, Big Agency may change their minds.
Lets say the rest of Big Agency likes New Writer. Mr. Agent has New Writer come in for a meet-and-greet. This goes well.
New Writer has been writing for some time. He has six polished scripts, all with solid concepts. He has workshopped his scripts
in a writing group. He may have been to film school or worked in the industry. He understands the business, lives in Los Angeles,
is in his twenties, and is not insane.
Mr. Agent sends New Writer's script out to a handful of known buyers, and after a brief skirmish for the script it sells
in the low six figures. New Writer does well at introductory meetings around town, and Mr. Agent is soon juggling offers for
New Writer's services even as New Writer diligently works on the rewrites of his first sold script. New Writer trades in his
'86 Camry for an '02 BMW. Mr. Agent sends a gift basket to Top Client for the recommendation.
See anything you don't like? Let me guess:
-Recommendation from a trusted client.
-First read by a harried assistant.
-Read by an exhausted indifferent agent at midnight.
-Script is very commercial.
-Agent must get agreement from other agents.
-Writer has sixwhole polished screenplays.
-Writer understands the industry well.
-Writer lives in Los Angeles.
-Writer is in his twenties.
-Writer is a he.
-Writer is not insane? Prejudiced *$&*&#(.
-Writer sells and can only afford a used, off-lease BMW?
This story happens a few times every year. It's the story that lures thousands of hapless writers toward Hollywood. It
is not the rule. It is the exception. But those million-dollar headlines keep the new writers pouring in, and the chokepoint
for so many is the task of landing an agent. You all send out your query letters and screenplays by the million. My thankless
task is to get you to stop. Or at least slow down and think about what you're doing.
Above is the dream vision of a New Writer as seen from the point of view of an agent in a large agency. So how do agents
view the vast horde of new writers encamped outside their office door, as represented by the tons of queries they receive
every year?
There's a Dilbert cartoon that meets the case. It's about a boss's view of his employees. In one frame is the employee's
view of himself: in robe and sandals, smiling and waving, walking on water as sunbeams and angels dance around his head. The
next frame is the boss's view of the same employee: face down on his desk, pinned to the desk by staples, yelling "Help!
Help! Stapler misfire!"
Yes, the rule is Hopeless Until Proven Otherwise.
Want to know how hard it really is to get an agent? The WGAw recently had a members-only panel discussion that featured
five well-known agents. The hundred or so attendees were told ahead of time that they could not pitch anything to the agents
before or after the meeting or ask the agents anything specific about the writers' own careers. Basically, it was a big hands-off.
These agents did not want to hear from professional writers who had had enough success to make it into the Writers Guild.
Imagine how anxious they are to hear from us.
On to the long, sad Q&A about Agents, Managers, and Attorneys:
Q: How do I get an agent?
A: You don't. They get you.
Basically, you get your script to a producer and they make you an offer. With money on the table, agents will come out
of the woodwork. No, you won't have your choice of any agent in town. There are many agents for whom the money a new writer
can earn is not worth their while. They are too busy servicing clients who are all earning more money than you can imagine.
But you should be able to land an aggressive young agent somewhere.
This is also the #1 way to know that you are ready to look for an agent. Success! Money! You like me! You really, really
like me! You have managed to lift yourself out of wannabe status all on your own. Remember that everyone in Hollywood wants
to hear someone else's opinion first before trying something new. Agents were created to act as temple guardians for the studios.
Food tasters, if you will. A script that comes in from an agency has already been vetted by someone whose opinion has some
value. Someone is vouching for that script and that writer. Well, now the agencies are sitting behind massive moats and walls
and you need a food taster to get your script in to them. Hence the importance of a recommendation, whether from an existing
client, a prodco, or some other local worthy.
The ultimate lure into an agency is money. A sale. Manage that, if you can, and your agency worries will be over.
Q: But this is a Catch-22. I can't sell a script until I have an agent and I can't get an agent until I sell a script?
A: Welcome to my world.
By now you should know that there is no "easy way" in Hollywood. Come back in your next life as the nephew of
a studio head. Yes, most well-known agencies and prodcos will refuse to even read query letters. I doubt that any of the studios
will ever read a query letter. Well, it's as true for you as it is for me as it is for the tens and hundreds of thousands
of other would-be screenwriters out there. But your assumptions are wrong. Remember, anything might work. Who says you can't
sell a script without an agent? That just isn't true. Query prodcos. They are infinitely more likely to read query letters
than big agencies.
Q: Okay, I'll hire an attorney to do my submissions.
A: Good luck!
Here's what goes through the mind of a producer when they see an attorney submission:
1. Who is this lawyer?
The world of qualified entertainment attorneys is small, high-powered and exclusive. Landing a good entertainment attorney
can be just as difficult as landing a good agent. You don't just pay them. You query them, you try to get your work read,
and you hope they will take you as a client. Any producer in town will recognize the name of a good attorney. If he doesn't
recognize your attorney's name, he'll know you hired your brother-in-law the real estate lawyer to send your script. Or borrowed
his letterhead. Not the oldest trick in the book, but one of them. You aren't gaining anything.
2. Why doesn't the writer have an agent?
If the producer does recognize the attorney's name, he will immediately wonder why the attorney hasn't managed to get
you an agent. That is part of the attorney's task, should the rare situation arise that he or she signs an unrepresented writer.
So why has every agent in town rejected this writer? Basically, the only working writers out there who have an attorney without
an agent are the mega-writers who are so well known and busy that they don't need an agent's help in landing work. They only
need someone to finalize their deals.
Q: I found an agent in Denver who likes my work--
A: Don't.
I picked Denver at random. No offense to anybody there. It's a lovely city filled with clever and interesting people.
But if you live there, you shouldn't be in the screenwriting agency business. Your agent should be in Southern California
(or, in certain instances, NYC). They should be in Los Angeles. In the 310 or maybe 323 area code. In a best-case scenario,
your agent should be able to stand in front of his office building and throw your script into traffic on Wilshire Boulevard.
And he probably will, but that's another story.
Look, I know there is more to landing an agent than moving your career forward. There is an enormous psychological weight
to taking this step. Not only do you feel like you're getting in the game, you can also tell your parents, spouse, friends,
kids, and accountant that you're becoming a professional. I know all that. If you need that reassurance so much that you are
willing to sign with that agent in Denver, or Poughkeepsie, or wherever, go ahead, but know that you are tying yourself to
someone who will probably not be able to help you.
Q: This agent wants me to pay a reading fee.
A: Run!
That is not a real agent. Agents in the state of California are licensed and not allowed to charge reading fees. See why
I want you to have an agent in California? They have to follow strict rules. They can't practice out of their homes. They
can be fired by their client if they do not land that client work in ninety days. They cannot have a production interest in
their clients' work. And they cannot charge reading fees. Needless to say, these scam artists who ignore these rules will
do nothing for your career.
Only seek and sign with agents who are on the WGA Agency list (www.wga.org). These agents have agreed to abide by Guild
rules in their representation of writers. If an agent is not on the list, avoid them. The exceptions are the larger agencies
that, while abiding by WGA rules, are so eager to avoid new writers seeking agents that they have asked to be excluded from
the list.
Q: The agent said they like my script, but said I have to have a certain script consultant give me notes to improve it
before they'll sign me.
A: See above.
This is actually a toughie. I'm sure in some instances it is perfectly legit. A small agent may want your script improved
and not feel they have the ability or time to give you rewrite notes. Most agents will offer some notes for you (free!) to
help you rewrite. Most bigger agents won't have the time to take on scripts that they don't feel are immediately marketable.
They aren't interested in handholding newbies.
But when you are told that you must use a specific script consultant before the agent will sign you, that should be a
big red flag. I take the dim view that this consultant is usually the agent's girlfriend or brother-in-law or dealer. Be careful.
Q: An agent said my work isn't commercial enough.
A: This means that they don't think it will sell and they don't want to try. Your work doesn't have the vaunted high-concept
and is possibly -gasp- character-driven. Not that there's anything wrong with that. Except to an agent. If your writing is
good, they will ask what else you have, with their fingers crossed that somewhere in your pile of scripts they will find something
they can sell. If not, you're on your own. If they don't ask, well, you have another problem.
If you are a great writer, a dedicated agent may be able to start your career as an assignment writer, but it's going
to be tough. Agents want scripts that look like movies. Hollywood movies, not art movies, and G-d help us, not French movies.
They want you to have a solid commercial sensibility. If you don't, or the idea of any of this crass business talk turns you
off, then don't bother the agents. Get your script into the hands of prodcos that make work like yours. Prove to an agent
that there is a market for the kind of work you do rather than insist they find that market for you.
Q: A manager just offered me a two year contract!
A: Much of what we've discussed above applies equally well to managers as it does to agents. With a few important exceptions.
One is the fact that agents are controlled by law and there is a mechanism to readily escape their contracts. Well, the land
of managers is the wild, wild west.
Managers are not allowed to try to get their clients work and they are not allowed to sell their clients' screenplays.
Of course they do these things all the time and many of them are very, very good at doing these things. They are supposed
to function as career consultants, and many of them are very, very good at that, too.
Managers are allowed to have a production interest in their clients' work. Most managers are also producers, and as we
know, producers are above the law. The few laws managers are supposed to obey, as mentioned above, are regulated by the labor
board. Getting out of one of their contracts requires filing a complaint to the labor board that they did try to solicit work
for you or sell your script (strange and not easy). For the most part, when you sign with a manager, you are tied to that
manager for the duration.
Your potential manager's production interests (if any) also mean a potential conflict of interest when it comes to your
work and your career. Yes, it is exciting to have someone say that not only do they want to represent you, they also want
to try to get your movie made. But this moment is not necessarily a win-win. As a producer, they want to produce the movie
for minimum dollars. As your representative, they should want to make the most lucrative possible deal for you. And who will
they fight for when push comes to shove, a potential movie deal or one writer? You can see the problem.
Let's back up and look at your contract. You are giving the manager the exclusive right to represent your script for a
given period of time (usually a year or two). A further clause not seen in agency contracts (obviously) speaks to the manager's
efforts as a producer. It may also give him a right of first refusal-- he will first try to get the movie set up before he
tries to sell it elsewhere.
Here is the punchline: your contract with a manager may be nothing more than a one- or two-year free option on your script
for which you receive zero money. You are tying your script to a producer (because under the manager hat that's what he is)
for a long, long time. You don't know this person well. You don't know if everyone in town hates him and if he got run out
of his last job on a rail.
How do I know all this? I fell for this one. This was a perfectly legitimate management firm/prodco, but they weren't
interested in me as a writer. Just in locking up one of my scripts. I did six or seven free rewrites before they took the
script out. When they couldn't set it up I never heard from them again. Eighteen months is a long time to wait for a contract
to expire.
Q: What other warning signs are there?
A: When sorrows come, they come not single spies, but in battalions:
1. Will this agent or manager tell me about their other clients? They should not hand out phone numbers and email addresses.
They should give you names you can look up on www.imdb.com. Call the WGA and ask for the Agency Desk and make sure that the
writers an agent mentions are actually represented by that agent. If the agent or manager does not represent any produced
writers, be wary. The qualifier, of course, is a young, hungry agent just starting out at a well-known agency. They may be
well worth the risk.
2. Does this agent or manager post their client's work on the Internet? Maybe not the whole script. Maybe just the log
line. This is not how it's done. The exclusivity of your idea is invaluable. If your agent is giving it away in cyberspace,
they don't understand the business. Note that this is not a slam against legitimate, password-protected sites like www.inktip.com.
But I've seen agents post their clients' work on their website for all the world to see. That is inappropriate.
3. Does this agent or manager want to see my other work? Here is a good way to find out if you're signing with a manager
or just signing a free option. When I made this mistake it was with a manager who never asked to see another one of my scripts
after signing me for the one. A good sign is a manager or agent who wants to see all your scripts (or at least those you think
are good) and wants to talk about your work and where you want to go in your career. That's what they're supposed to do, right?
Right.
4. Has the producer/manager ever produced anything before? Some folks want to become producers but don't know how. Or
they lack the killer drive needed to work their way up through internships, PA positions, and all the other big-work, little-money
positions required along the way. So these folks decide to latch on to ten or twenty motivated young writers and hope one
of them will drag them into the game. These folks are script remoras. If you manage to get the script into the hands of an
actual, factual producer or a studio exec, they discover your manager attached to the project, complete with a payday and
producer credit for the manager. This unpleasant burden can kill your new deal.
What you need to do with your manager is make sure your contract has a non-circumvention clause. This means that if your
manager gets the script sold or into production you will not be able to exclude them from their fair share of that deal. But
if you set the script up through your own exclusive efforts, they will not be able to claim a share in the deal. Remember,
they are there to help you, not hinder you.
5. This list will grow as I remember various #*$(*# problems writers have had over the years.
Q: Do I need an agent?
A: This one is most obviously me asking the question, because I know none of you will. All of you are thinking "Of
course!"
Well, you're wrong. You don't need an agent. You need an agent when the business affairs department of a studio calls
to ask for your Social Security Number because they're going to write you a big check. Actually, you need an agent a couple
of stages before that, but you get the idea. You need an agent when someone says: "We are interested in buying your script.
Who's your agent?"
When you really, truly, genuinely need an agent, an agent will be easy to get. The degree to which it is difficult for
you to get an agent now is the degree to which you do not need one. Agents are not there to create a career for you. They
are not there to sell your work. Agents Are On Earth To Negotiate Deals. That Is All. Tape that on your computer screen and
never forget it. Do agents do more than that? Yes, much more. They fight like hyenas day and night for their clients. They
are the most insanely overworked people you will ever meet. Remember that WGAw agents panel I mentioned earlier? One of the
agents received 119 messages on his cell phone during the course of the two-hour panel.
Agents love doing the work. For their clients who make money. For their clients who have deals. Do not expect them to
be delighted to do the same for someone who has yet to see their first dime.
So no, you don't need an agent. Be your own agent. Get your script to prodcos. When someone wants your work, you can get
an agent. When someone likes your writing, you can ask for referrals. And please, take this frantic energy and effort you
put into trying to land an agent back into your writing where it belongs.
I dream of a day when only writers who need agents seek them out. Agents share my dream. Their assistants and the poor
souls in agency mailrooms all over town share my dream. Our dream will never come true.
Q: Okay, so how do I get an agent?
A: Third time's a charm. It must be, because I hear it asked at least this many times in any given one-hour panel on any
topic in any screenwriting seminar or conference I've ever attended.
Are you ready for an agent? Do you have at least six finished scripts, at least three of which shine with perfect genius
and brilliant commercial potential? Have you educated yourself about the business? Do you love writing enough that the realities
of a screenwriter's life won't send you running into the hills? Then proceed:
-Get a recommendation. From a producer who likes your work, from an established writer who teaches a class you take, someone.
No, your creative writing professor at college is not good enough. It has to be an established person inside the entertainment
industry. And be gracious about it. Don't just rush up to a panelist at a conference and ask for their agent's name. Make
sure it's someone who knows you and knows your work. Don't compromise someone else's integrity along with your own.
-Be a Nicholl winner or finalist. See the contest section. Some other contests may attract the attention of agents. I've
had two script requests from well-known agencies as a result of winning the Screenwriting Expo Grand Prize.
-Work in an agency. People have made this happen. Be warned that starting a trainee program at an agency involves long
odds and a crushing amount of work. But you will learn a lot and eventually you will get your writing read by someone (if
only your fellow mailroom guy-- he might be an agent some day!).
-Find any connections you have to agents. Ask your great-uncle Bernie if he had any old school chums run off to work the
mailroom at William Morris after the war. Dig for connections. Again, be a grown up about approaching people for a favor.
-Aim for the right agent. We already discussed the idea of agents out in the middle of the country. So, no, you should
not look for an agent where you live, unless you live in L.A.. Then consider the small fish/big pond problem. Yes, if you
end up being the next powerhouse writer you will probably be represented by a big agency. But there is much to be said for
smaller agencies, and not just for beginning writers. Think about the agent at a major agency. His big screenwriting client
may be making a million dollars on his next deal. But to the agent down the hall who represents major actors, that's chump
change. Guess which agent has more power inside that agency? Guess which client they will fight for harder?
A small, lit-only agency could be the perfect fit for you. And they are much more likely to consider you as a client.
Launching a new writer is a labor-intensive, usually thankless task. Big agents don't have the time to put in for the relatively
miniscule reward. They know that if the big money starts flowing your way in a few years they can swoop in and steal you from
the small agent who started your career. It happens all the time. Try to find that small, devoted, hard-working agent you
can abandon later.
-Write a query letter. We've come to the last resort. For most of you, it's the first resort. Here is the best advice
I can give you: Keep It Short. Here is all you need:
1. Suitable greeting. Not Dear Agent, not To Whom it May Concern. Again, research. Use the correct name and the correct
gender.
2. Generic "I have recently completed a screenplay." Come up with something less awkward if you can. Again,
brevity. Note that you don't have to tell the agent that you are seeking representation. They will guess.
3. Log Line. This is the beginning and the end of the whole thing right here. I want to set this off in asterisks, banners,
stars, and singing angels. This is where you live and die. I had a friend working at a prodco who said he dreamed of query
letters that were just a log line and a phone number. He didn't read anything else. Workshop your log line. There are loads
of places you can do this on line in front of strangers who, unlike your mother, do not care if they hurt your feelings. Get
it right.
4. Your qualifications, if they are significant. Did you go to a major film school? Win a major screenwriting award? If
you have written a medical thriller, are you a doctor? Anything less significant than this should be left out.
That's it, that's all. One page. Do not send any part of the script or a synopsis or treatment unless specifically asked
to do so. Then sit back and enjoy the silence, because not one query letter in fifty will receive a response, positive or
otherwise. Do not call to find out if they got your letter. It has probably already been recycled into the Starbucks cup sitting
next to your keyboard.
|
