Submitted By: John
There once was a man from Garget
Who used his head for a target
When birds flew by they let their poop fly
That cruddy old man for garget
Submitted By: RobD
There once was a young man called Tim,
Who thought his girlfriend was really quite dim,
For she wrote a love song,
But must've got the words wrong,
'Cause the chorus praised herself and not him.
Submitted By: aleata
There once was a chap from New Jersey
Who couldn't stay sober til Thursday
But once he stopped drinkin'
He started to thinkin'
Whatever had made me so thirsty?
Submitted By: Reid Wuntke
There once was a cook from New York,
Who said you should always stew pork,
He said he once tried,
To eat some fried,
And claims he would rather chew cork.
Submitted By: Emily Ardoin
There once was a girl named Tess
Her hair was always a mess
She was always in a rush
And always made a fuss
And finally laid to rest
Submitted By: Bee!
I knew of a hedgehog in Texas
Who purchased a shiny new Lexus
He sped away fast
But he didn't last
Cuz he was sucked up into a Nexus!
Submitted By: Brandon Ward
There was a man named Dale
He hit himself with a flail
People thought he was lazy
But he was truly crazy
So he was put in a jail
Submitted By: Robert Johnston
There once lived a King of Poote
He married a girl that as cute
She stole his bun
So he took out a gun
And he finally gave her the boote
Submitted By: Oscar Pena
There once was a man named Bob,
When he ate, he ate like a slob,
He ate only chicken,
But he didn't have a kitchen,
'Cause Bob had a mininum-wage job!
Submitted By: Donnnie
I live in a world of black and white,
nothing seems to make me bright,
when I go out,
I always pout,
which always leads me to fight.
Submitted By: Jaime
There once was a visitor form space.
He was slimy with a bright blue face.
He came to explore,
but found earth a bore,
And left without leaving a trace.
Submitted By: Peter
There once was a lynx from Montana
Who liked to live in a cabana
He came out for some sun
And found there was none
So off he went to Havana
Submitted By: Dawg
One day I cut my hair
But only for a dare
I hated it at first
I was ready to burst
But now I just don't care
Submitted By: Carlos Garay
There was once a blonde bimbo from Bombay
And a man came to her to say...
How are you airhead?
Her head got big, she grew angry and red
A wind blew and she floated away!
Submitted By: Edward Lear
There was an Old Man who supposed,
That the street door was partially closed;
But some very large rats,
Ate his coats and his hats,
While that futile old gentleman dozed.
Submitted By: Seth
There was an old man,
Who had a pan in his hand,
He hit the dog,
And the dog had a bump as big as a log,
Then he ran
Submitted By: Wesley Eggebrecht
There once was an athlete named Sam
who ate a can full of ham
he got very sick
and said ick ick ick
and now he eats spam ham
Submitted By: Padget Crossman
There was a girl with a cat
Who always wore a hat
A flower, a bee,
And a cup of tea
is what sat on top of her hat.
Submitted By: Amanda
There was a young man called Fisher,
Who was angling for fish in a Fissure
When a haddie with a grin
pulled poor Fisher in.
Now they're fishing the fissure for Fisher.
Submitted By: Matthew Mize
There once was a big fat cow
Who looked like some tasty chow
So we cut off his head
Doc pronounced him dead
And we've got him on the table right now
Submitted By: Your Web Form
There once was a boy named rick
who said he could do a neat trick
so with a big grin
he grossed out his friends
for it wasn't his nose that he picked
Submitted By: Your Web Form
There once was a man with a dream
that he played on a major league team
the dream was so real
that he signed a big deal
but it turned out to be a bis scheme
Submitted By: Damien Chow
Damien was working on a project one day,
And when everyone said he couldn't finish it he said, "No Way!!"
He stayed up all night
And gave his mom quite a fright,
But he finished it and got an A.
Thanks for providing a limerick for my english project!!!
Submitted By: kelli portwood
Niceness
The poems on this page are dumb,
I wonder where they did come from.
You need to take time
To make the things rhyme
Before to this website you come.
Submitted By: Mike Ganci
A Limerick's easy to write
Five lines with a humorous bite
And the first one must rhyme
with the last two each time
While the middle two paired make it right.
Loony Limericks / webmaster@loonies.zzn.com / revised March 1999