In a castle that had a deep moat
Lived a chicken a duck and a goat.
They wanted to go out
And wander about
But all they needed was a boat.
There was a young girl from Oliver,
And all the men did follow her,
Until a guy came along,
And played her his song,
And all the rest quit call'n her.
There once was a man from Bombay
who wore on his head a toupee.
He thought that he might
give friends a delight
and remove his toupee for a day.
There one was a man from Peru,
Who dreamed of eating his shoe,
he awoke with a fright,
in the middle of the night,
and found that his dream had come true!
There was a farmer from Leeds,
Who ate six packets of seeds,
It soon came to pass,
He was covered with grass,
And he couldn't sit down for the weeds!
There once was a man from Great Britain
Who interrupted two girls at their knittin'.
Said he with a sigh,
"That park bench, well I
Just painted it right where you're sittin'."
There was a young hunter named Shepherd
Who was eaten for lunch by a leopard.
Said the leopard, "Egad!
You'd be tastier, lad
If you had been salted and peppered!"
A flea and a fly in a flue
Were imprisoned, so what could they do?
Said the fly, "let us flee!"
"Let us fly!" said the flea.
So they flew through a flaw in the flue.
There was a young woman named Bright
Whose speed was much faster than light.
She set out one day
In a relative way,
And returned on the previous night.
An epicure dining at Crewe
Found a very large bug in his stew.
Said the waiter, "Don't shout
And wave it about,
Or the rest will be wanting one too."