Release Date: August 11, 2004
Starring: Anne Hathaway, Julie Andrews, Chris Pine, Hector Elizondo, John Rhys-Davies, Heather Matarazzo, Kathleen Marshall
Directed by: Garry Marshall
Written by: Shonda Rhimes
Distributed by: Buena Vista Pictures
MPAA Rating: G
Anne Hathaway, the 21-year-old star of The Princess Diaries 2: Royal Engagement, should probably think about legally changing her name to Princess Anne. She has the interesting distinction of having starred in two different princess movies in 2004, and, moreover, having spent 60 percent of her very brief career playing the lead role as some kind of princess (she was in the original Princess Diaries, of course, and also starred in 2004’s Ella Enchanted, which thus account for three of the five movies she has been in to date). Unfortunately, these movies have been occasionally mediocre but more than likely -- and The Princess Diaries 2 is a prime example of this -- patronizingly, insufferably the same.
It is made, as these movies almost always are, for a target audience that is substantially younger than the characters in the movie (although for once, the actors and the characters they play are roughly the same age) -- which means that people like Mia Thermopolis (Hathaway), the story’s just-turned-21 heroine, end up caught in an unappealing rut of slapsticky, preteen comedy. Hathaway, despite her rather narrow career choices so far, has the talent to do better things than this.
But this is the appeal of the character: a Pretty Woman¬-type heroine who is thrust, despite her propensity for physical calamity and a general inability to keep herself composed, into a position of relatively supreme power (or at least power-in-waiting). To this end, The Princess Diaries 2, directed by Garry Marshall and written by Shonda Rhimes (the original was based on Meg Cabot’s popular novel, but here she only gets credit for the characters) picks up five years after the first movie left off. Mia, the once-dorky San Francisco teenager, has moved to Genovia, the tiny European nation of which she is the crown princess. Her grandmother Clarisse (Julie Andrews), the current queen, is set to step down, but a villainous parliamentarian (John Rhys-Davies) points out an archaic law that obliges Mia to marry within 30 days if she is to ascend the throne -- and simultaneously pushes his nephew, young Nicholas Devereaux (Chris Pine), as the most obvious suitor.
This is, of course, all part of a very ham-handed and obvious ploy to steal the crown, which, if it weren’t clear from the villain’s soap opera-style soliloquies delivered, apropos of nothing, almost straight into the camera, would still be plain to see because Rhys-Davies is the most sinister member of the cast in terms of appearance. By comparison, Hathway, Andrews, and Pine all look relatively rosy and harmless; they constantly seem as though they should be playing touch football on the beach in a (G-rated) Tommy Hilfiger commercial.
Various other members of the original cast return, perhaps mostly out of obligation to director Marshall. Hector Elizondo once again draws the role of Queen Clarisse’s security chief Joe, though this time he gets mired in an extraneous subplot involving a very chaste and sincere romance with the soon-to-be ex-queen. Heather Matarazzo shows up as Mia’s obnoxious friend Lilly, because in Marshall’s romantic comedies, the wacky best friend is a near-sacred requirement. And Kathleen Marshall, daughter to the director (and, therefore, another regular in his movies), looks exhausted in the by-now-pointless role of Mia’s personal aide. (Not returning is Mandy Moore, who barely rated as a supporting actress in 2001 but has since lapped Hathaway in terms of prestige and bankable status.)
Some viewers may notice other carryovers from the first film, including the “foot pop” when Mia first kisses Nicholas -- which immediately, but for no apparent reason, singles him out as Mia’s inevitable love interest. As with the original Princess Diaries, though, Mia’s decision-making process is so passive-aggressive it could be clinically diagnosed. The whole second act is taken up with an unbearable series of standoffish encounters between the two, though they are obviously smitten with each other. Nobody seems to realize that a marriage between the two would not only satisfy both of them, but also the ancient marriage law requirement and Nicholas’s curmudgeonly uncle. The sooner they do, the sooner everybody wins, including the audience, because then the movie can finally end.
What will probably never end is Marshall’s fascination with the princess version of the Pygmalion story -- though as is clear from The Princess Diaries 2, the tale has a very limited shelf life. Mia’s adventures are starting to get a little repetitious. But since she is thankfully crowned as queen of Genovia in the last scene of this movie, it means that, for reasons of terminology alone, The Princess Diaries 3 is out of the question. Which is so much the better, because while I may someday look back on 2004 as the year I saw and reviewed quite a few princess movies, I am certain that I will not look back on it, as Will Ferrell says, with much fondness.
-- Craig Roush (craigroush@hotmail.com)