• when your medicine chest has Flagyl, Panacur, etc. and little in the way of "people" medicine. 
• if your license plate says, "ribbet." 
• if you know the nutritional content of bugs.
• if you see a roach crossing your kitchen and you think "food"! 
• if you are lulled to sleep by the chirping of crickets, yet it's winter and you live in a high rise. 
• if your living room is kept at 78 degrees with 80 percent humidity. 
• if you're buying crickets wholesale and you are on a first name basis with the supplier! 

• when you meet a fellow frogger (a person you have only talked to online but never met in person) in the parking lot of McDonalds before daylight to pass over a box of crickets.... and wonder what other folks are staring at... 
• if the tag on the front of your new truck......that you bought to haul tanks....says "Frogs"..... 
• if all your T-shirts have frogs...... 
• if your frog jewelry rivals that of any decent department store....... 
• if you give up a cruise to the bahamas because you can't bear to leave your frogs...... 
• if you make excuses to inspect the greenhouse and all the bushes and grounds outside your office for "bugs"..... 
• if ponds on campus attract your attention........ 
• if you get up and check frogs before brushing your teeth or taking a shower to go to work 
• if your American Express bill matches the national debt.......and thats just for frog food....... 

• if you always know the right latin name of a given frog immediately, but whenever one of your three sons has to be called, you have trouble putting the right name on him... (BTW, this is a citation from my wife..) 

• if you go to the grocery store and think as you walk by the isle, "Gee, that's a good container for fruitfly cultures!" 
• if you actually go through the trash at work to collect Snapple bottles after a "thank you" breakfast celebration for completing a research drug study. 
• if your rear car bumper is full of "Peace Frog" stickers. 
• if you purchased fabric designed with poison arrow frogs and tree frogs and had it custom-made to a scrub shirt to wear in the hospital. 

• if you've parked after midnight in a residential neighborhood that has recently been devastated by tornadoes and has looters running around and every police car in the Metro Atlanta area cruising the streets. One pulls up behind you to ask what your doing there, and you say "listening for frogs".  Then they don't believe you until you point out the tape recorder, field guide and 20-some plastic frogs on your dashboard. 
• if you wear frog earrings so you can tell people about your real live frogs at home when they admire them. 
• if you're the only adult without a small child at the "Frog Frolics," waiting patiently through the goofy songs and roasting marshmallows around the campfire so you can hunt for frogs in a National Recreation Area after dark. 
• if you go on vacation to a rural area and hope it rains, so you can drive 1.5 miles an hour down a deserted road stopping to shoo frogs and toads off the road after you ID them. 

• when your frogs have a better sex life than you and you're happy about it. 

• if you've been asked to get out of a 5-star hotel's pond because there was a strange frog call you didn't recognize in there. 
• if you've been approached by security guards (in private property) at night and the response you  gave them was that you were there to listen to frogs calling.

• when you identify your car in a crowded parking lot by the plastic frog on the dashboard or the plush frog with suction cup hands stuck on the back window. 
• when all your neighbors have set aside a small portion of their gardens for vegetables but you use this area in your garden to grow moss. 
• when instead of relaxing like everyone else at the picnic you're collecting cool looking rocks and driftwood for your vivarium. 

if everyone can smell the fruitfly cultures but you. 

if there are crickets loose all over the place. 

if people on the phone ask what that chirping/croaking noise is in the background. 

if you own any or all of the following: 

• a cap with an embroidered red-eye on it 
• a T-shirt with assorted poison frogs plastered all over it 
• a frog-patterned tie 
• frog jewelry. 

if you wear goggles, a green lycra suit and flippers to bed-- and then again, you might be lots of other things. 

if you don't use bug spray anymore and every bug you encounter is judged on edibility and culture potential. 

you travel more than a hundred miles just to check out a herp show...then blow this month's rent on that batch of lehmannis. 

if.you've ever been kicked out of a domestic airport because they were closing, but you and your friends were still sitting on the floor peering into little deli cups containing frogs that had just come in. 

when an infestation of any kind of insect isn't necessarily a bad thing. In fact, it can be downright wonderful. 

if you go to a frog event or meet a frog person, you dress for it. Gotta wear that frog t-shirt! 

• when you are walking through the terminal with a fellow frognut, who is thinking he should have brought a gift for the person transporting his frogs, and you see him eyeing the decorative bromiliads thoughtfully.... 
• when someone asks " Do you have A frog?" and a resounding chorus of your coworkers yells "DOES SHE HAVE "A" FROG??!!" 
• when, after a family visit, you are telling your stepbrother goodbye, and you say "Thank you sooo much  for the termites!!", and he replies "Thanks soo much for the hissing roaches" 
• when spending a nice romantic evening on the beach, you take the opportunity to find the "perfect" rock for the waterfall in your new tank. 

• if you "borrow" a pup from the broms in the airport lobby. 
• if you scrape moss of a rock in the zoo and stuff it in a film can in your pocket. 

• if you ask the mall's gardener if you can go collect offsets from their bromeliads for your frogs. 

• when you read 10 FrogNut posts and Wonder HOW DO THESE PEOPLE KNOW ME SO WELL! They all fit -except the earrings. You know your wife (spouse) is becoming when she goes to a reptile show with you.... and says OK you should buy those 2 azureus. 

• when somebody ask him/her "why do you go fishing at that lake so much?" and his/her answer is "to eliminate those bass who ate my friends". 
• when he/she said to the whole family "We need to take a summer vacation.Let's go to San Jose on September 5th." 

• if your basement sounds like a brook. 
• if you're catching a frog in a stream, you crawl under a fence and hit the electric wire (bang, splash), you turn to look for the wire and (bang, splash), and the part that gits to you is your partners on the banks of the creek rolling and laughing their fool heads off, asking if you got the frog. 
• if your next door neighbors call in a noise violation from your house every spring.

• if producing a healthy "crop" of aphids is the sole purpose of your garden.

• when having a friend call you to help remove a termite filled tree is more exciting than a night on the town... 
• if your monthly payments on your car are less than your monthly expenses on aquariums, pumps and plants. 
• if you call Orkin and ask them to bring termites to your house. 
• if you find yourself becoming fluent in Latin.

• if there is an oily circle on the front of the terrarium (from pressing your nose against the glass) 

• if you have 47+ plastic replicas of dart frogs sitting around your office among the myriad of frog posters and calendars and screensavers... 
• if you have rules about what kind of frog art you are willing to buy... 
• if you considered taking your spouse to the World Series only so you could side trip to the Atlanta Botanical Gardens... 
• if you'd drive to Chicago's Shedds acquarium on the day after Thanksgiving just to look at frogs! 

• if you spend $60.00 on fruit flies but don't have money to go out for supper. 

• if you don't mind paying $60 shipping on a $20 frog 
• when a cry of "It's morphin' time!" doesn't necessarily mean Power Rangers are on. 

• when you find an old, forgotten culture of fruit flies that is absolutely PACKED with bugs ... and you get excited! 

• if you remember your first species of frog, but not your first girl/boy friend. 
• if your frog room is bigger than your bedroom (or if you even have a frogroom). 
• if you have more money invested in frogs than your house. 
• if you refuse to eat until the fruit fly cultures are set up. 
• if you check the classifieds in your local newspaper daily to look for aquariums. 
• if you check your email every 10 minutes to see if a new message is up. 
• if your on Anthony's classified adds checking for any new frogs daily. 
• if your license plate has anything frog related. 
• if everyone in your school/workplace knows what frogs you have (and pronounce them correctly). 
• if you go into a library and beg for cuttings of the plants. 
• if you save any plastic, glass, or otherwise bottles for cultures. 
• if you get excited when you see a clip of a show in the rainforest praying they mention frogs. 
• if you haven't heard what's happening over in the Middle East, but are exactly up to speed on frognet. 
• if you get giddy if you hear the fainest noise from the direction of a frog. 

• when you're thrilled to find masses of whitefly on the backs of your Brugsmansia leaves in winter.

• if while taking Holy Communion on Christmas Eve you
  think  "these little cups would work for imitator, small dart frogs, and some of the obligate oophages". 

• if while working at the scene of a messy double execution homicide you are on your cell phone calling airlines and shippers on an incoming frog deal while your partner is on the phone with homicide inspectors and the coroner (and then ducking out on said inspectors to make a quick run to pick up the frogs at the airport).

• when you go into your walk-in closet and swear you just walked into  Rubbermaid's storage warehouse.
• when your left lung collapses and you're in the hospital for several days, and the whole time you're on Oxygen you kept thinking how great the airlines would work in some of your setups.

• if part of your pickup lines includes "so what do you think about frogs", or so what pets do you have" (and then pray they ask you the same question).
• if people you don't even know ask you how your frogs are doing.
• when on a boring trip you play "name that color, and I'll name the species".
• if when cleaning out your dad's hunting spot, you beg to borrow the chain saw to get that great piece of wood.

• when you plant roses and HOPE to get aphids!

• when your wife orders a specialty plate for her car that says "MRS FRG "

• if you trip over tanks and jars while walking into your bedroom.
• if you can't watch TV past 12PM because your outlets are on timers.
• if you won't go out with your friends because you're saving your paycheck for that captive bred azureus.
• if the only reason you have a job is to feed your frogs.
• if you can't wait to get home from work and see your frogs.
• if you skip prom because you need to clean your frogs tank.
• if there is precipitation building up on the windows in your bedroom.
• if you can't fall asleep without hearing crickets chirp.
• if your frogs get more attention than your family.
• if you yell at your parents for having music on too loud late at night because you don't want your frogs to get stressed out.
• if you have an alarm system on your bedroom so no one can bother your frogs while your at work.
• if the only reason you have an alarm system on your house is so nobody comes and hurts/steals your frogs.
• if your yard waste can contains mostly old frog bedding.
• if you refuse to dissect frogs for science class because it's cruel. 
   

• if you haven't missed a day of work in five years and you call in sick to take your frog to the vet!
• if you get all excited about a sale on canning jars and you don't have any fruit trees or a vegetable garden!
• if you hear a news report about a plague of crickets in another state and you think 'What good luck!'

• when your known at the pet stores as the froglady!
• when you think your vacation was a flop because you didn't seen even one frog!
• when you are willing to drive 300 miles to pick up custom made frog tanks (I will be doing this soon)!

• if you've ever had to explain to your landlord why the Orkin man shouldn't ever hit your apartment for spraying.  My excuse was "chemical allergies".
• if you have ever had to completely clean your living quarters to rid them of errant fruitflies before the roommate gets back from fall break.
• if you have so many snakes and frogs in your dorm room that when you are forced to cut back you still keep the frogs.

• if all your passwords are frognames.
• if you have considered Hyla as a name for your baby if it had been a girl. (to top this off... one of my pupils is called Rana, but she keeps looking puzzled if I call her Froggie.. Even worse, her last name is Curry)
• if you could not find a doorbell making 'ribbit' or other quacking noises and now have no doorbell at all.
• if you read this.

• when you find fruit flies in the fruit salad! (Fortunately I noticed before it got served!)
• when you are eating lunch with your fellow workers, your cell phone rings, and after you have your conversation and hang up, one of your coworkers asks, "Did I just hear you place an order for flies!?"
• when your address book has more phone numbers for feeder insect suppliers than for relatives!
• when you take your niece some fruit fly cultures as a hostess gift!
• when you have the 800 number for ordering canning jars!
• when you go to the movie just to see the frogs!
• when your oatmeal goes into your fruitfly cultures instead of your breakfast!
• when you buy more frogs to manage your "fruit fly" collection!

• if your new-years champagne looks like a fruitfly swimming pool.

• when you have to explain to house guests why there are fruit flys crawling all over your banana cake ( I liked having a tank in the kitchen, but it just didn't work out!!!).
• when you spend hours on end trying to figure out how to start a culture of the giant strain of fruit flys that infest your local grocery store/fast food restraunt.

• when you ask your dentist for used saliva suction tubes "for preventing tadpoles from getting hurt when I siphon out water."

• when basking under the glow of the full spectrum lighting in your frog room, enjoying the first morning pumilio peeps and imitator trills, watching your frogs go through their morning skin eating ritual and taking your first sip of coffee you feel something squirming on your tongue...realizing it is just another drosophila at the wrong place and the wrong time...you knock it back with a second sip of java... mmm... protein.

• when your a frog nut when your partner opens an expensive bottle of wine and you hope it will be foul so you can have it for fruit fly cultures.
• when he empties the dregs out after a couple of days later, before asking permission, and you start wondering about life on your own again.

• when you get excited about the latest edition of the Carolina Biological Supply catalog!
• when you open your brief case at a meeting and find a bottle with a fruit fly culture you forgot to take out!  : - o

• when you happen upon a forgotten tub of termites and it makes your day!
• if you allow the moss to start taking over a section of your lawn and you are happy about it!
• if you start compiling a list of plants that aphids seem to love!
• if you go down and aisle in the market and catch yourself watching the bottles for possible fruitfly bottles.
• if you buy on PURPOSE bags of flour that are infested with moths.
• when you spend an entire day tromping thru the woods COLLECTING termites. 
• when you look forward to insect infestations.Indian meal moths in my chicken mash (I use it for cricket feed).

• when you move the TV out of the den because that's where your frogs are and you don't what people disturbing your frogs by staying up late watching TV!
• when you only visit fabric stores to buy stuff for your frogs!
• when you buy a vacuum cleaner to collect ants!
• when you BUY termites!

• if you drink beer from a bottle and automatically put your thumb on top to avoid entering fruitflies...
• if you complain about your children that they'eat all the fruits and leave nothing to rot...
• if your son comes home, agitated, saying: "Daddy, my teacher says frogs are GREEN"!
• if you consider importing termites.

• if you drink beer from a bottle and when a fruitfly falls you think oh well more protein and vitamin coated to boot.

• (see above) or if you lamented the loss of a food item rather than the spoilt beer.

• if you give directions to your house that always end in "the mailbox is a frog, you can't miss it." (it's an auratus, actually)
• if you wake up early on a Saturday morning to move things around in the kitchen/frogroom, because you don't think the kitchen cabinet estimate guy would want to come back if he got grossed-out by fruitflies or wondered about all of those tadpoles near the breadbox...
• if you have a badly-planned fly breeding project go badly amiss and end up with HOUSEFLIES in your cultures, plus some weird little triangular-shaped flies and small biting gnats that you just can't figure out...
• if you've ever opened any sort of container and then remembered that it was a culture of (insert bug here).
• if you've ever misted any tanks when guests were over, attempting to show them that there *are* frogs in those tanks of plants, if they would just move around or start calling...

• if wildlife shows on The Discovery Channel and Animal Planet pale in comparison to what's going on in your bedroom, living room, hall...

• if you take a day off work to clean out the frogroom so you can spray for the brown recluse spiders.

• if you can never keep 'human food' leftovers. Your 200+ 
  tupperware, rubbermaid tubs, servin' savers and deli cups all have air holes.

• when your wife has to put up with fruit flies crawling on you while watching TV.  That's love!

• when you purposefully transplant vermin into your domicile...

• if you plan your wedding around Big frog shows.
  (sorry honey we can't do it in November, Thats IAD!) 

• when you produce WAY to many FF's and instead of throwing them away, you decide to buy more frogs.

• (and single...) when you find small beetles have infested the drawer that holds some of your fruit fly starter stuff...in your kitchen...and they seem to be eating the dry yeast... you take a few out to attempt to rear them ...and then pour out more yeast packets in to the drawer... don't tell my girlfriend... she's very accepting but kitchen drawer beetle farming may be too much for here :) 

• if your friends say, "Every time I see a frog I think of you."  And you take it as a compliment!