Yes, 1998 has broken down the door to the house of life, and arrived like a rude party guest. I was just getting used to the jagged-looking 1997, when the rounded, supple curves of ’98 arrived to take control. Fine, be that way, ’98.

Herewith, my annual list of resolutions.

1) There is a productivity goal I’ve set for my screenwriting. I will keep you appraised.

2) Last year I was nicer to people. This year, I’m going to be a bit meaner. I tried mending some broken friendships over the past year, and what did it get me? Injured again. Will I ever learn?

3) I resolve to discount resolution number two as a simple flight of fancy. I’ll probably be extra nice again to just about everyone I know, even those who’ve tried hard to be mean to me (whether they meant to or not).

4) And if I could have four resolutions, I would resolve for all the children of the world to join hands … oh, never mind. Old Steve Martin bit from SNL. Sorry.

5) More Rock, Less Talk!

6) The slow, steady move toward healthier eating will continue this year. Thanks to great and generous Christmas gifts, I’ll be able to grill things in my own kitchen. I grilled up some turkey kielbasa just the other night. Mmm, mmm good!

7) You know, there are certain areas of my apartment that could use a good organizational overhaul. More throwing things out. I may not need to keep ticket stubs from every event I go to. (What do I do with them later? Look at them, and think back to the event, I guess. A form of time travel, perhaps.)

8) I will get an agent.

9) "Discipline" and "desire" will be my two favorite words as I make my new writing career happen.

10) And, as always, I resolve to really, really spend a lot more time next year coming up with better resolutions.