Genesis

I left this book to nearly the last in my exploration of the Bible. As I have progressed in my studies, I have found many new things to think about, and I expected that reading this book would be rather interesting. I wasn't disappointed. There are dozens of things to comment on in this book on origins. I often wonder at the minds of the people who feel determined to find ways to make this book appear to be true and scientifically accurate. What they could possibly be thinking is (nowadays) pretty strange to me.

Gen 1:6-8 - And God said, "Let there be a dome in the midst of the waters, and let it separate the waters from the waters." So God made the dome and separated the waters that were under the dome from the waters that were above the dome. And it was so. God called the dome Sky. And there was evening and there was morning, the second day.
For those who are a little behind in the technology scene, this is a far more accurate translation than we see in the King James version. The Hebrews actually thought that the sky was a solid dome that held back the rain waters. And in case you're still thinking that this might still be accurate, I wouldn't be too concerned. The space programs have demonstrated that the sky is not a solid dome covering a flat earth!

Gen 1:14-19 - And God said, "Let there be lights in the dome of the sky to separate the day from the night; and let them be for signs and for seasons and for days and years, and let them be lights in the dome of the sky to give light upon the earth." And it was so. God made the two great lights-the greater light to rule the day and the lesser light to rule the night-and the stars. God set them in the dome of the sky to give light upon the earth, to rule over the day and over the night, and to separate the light from the darkness. And God saw that it was good. And there was evening and there was morning, the fourth day.
Now, I don't want to go through the whole program of the 6 days here, but I really need to comment on this. As most people know, we measure our days based on the rotation of the Earth. How the writer here thought that anyone could measure days without the sun existing is beyond me. I also found it interesting that light was created 3 "days" before the sun, moon and stars. As one wag has put it: God created light - there was still nothing, but at least you could see it!

Gen 1:27,28 - So God created humankind in his image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them. God blessed them, and God said to them, "Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth and subdue it; and have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the air and over every living thing that moves upon the earth."
We can't get 5 words into what God supposedly said to humans without getting into trouble. The multiplication order wouldn't be a problem if there were limitless lands and other natural resources to support humanity - but it just ain't so. And what's this about filling the Earth and subduing it? Obviously, the God who said that was not very environment-conscious!

Gen 2:2 - And on the seventh day God finished the work that he had done, and he rested on the seventh day from all the work that he had done.
I find this interesting. I've often heard that God is omnipotent, meaning that he has infinite powers. If that's the case, it would be impossible for God to feel "tired" or have any need for resting.

Gen 2:4-7 - These are the generations of the heavens and the earth when they were created. In the day that the Lord God made the earth and the heavens, when no plant of the field was yet in the earth and no herb of the field had yet sprung up-for the Lord God had not caused it to rain upon the earth, and there was no one to till the ground; but a stream would rise from the earth, and water the whole face of the ground- then the Lord God formed man from the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and the man became a living being.
Wait a sec! I thought we just finished with the creation story! Where the heck did this come from? According to linguists, this second story of creation comes from a different writer from the author of the first story. This makes sense, since the two stories contradict each other in important ways. The real puzzle is why were both stories just jammed together like this? It sounds like a committee was involved!

Gen 2:15-17 - The Lord God took the man and put him in the garden of Eden to till it and keep it. And the Lord God commanded the man, "You may freely eat of every tree of the garden; but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat of it you shall die."
This sounds like a set-up to me. What could possibly be the reason for leaving a lethal tree out where people could get at it? I find it interesting that the writer thought that the worst, most horrible thing for humans would be for them to have knowledge of good and evil!

Gen 3:4-7 - But the serpent said to the woman, "You will not die; for God knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil." So when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was to be desired to make one wise, she took of its fruit and ate; and she also gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate. Then the eyes of both were opened, and they knew that they were naked; and they sewed fig leaves together and made loincloths for themselves.
Well, let's look at this famous passage for problems! First off, the serpent tells Eve the truth - she didn't die, and she became like God, in the sense that she knew the difference between good and evil. The next thing that I found interesting was that before learning the difference between good and evil, Eve (and Adam, for that matter) supposedly had no idea that not following instructions might be "bad," so that they were in a catch-22 situation. Lastly, it appears that this is following the standard model of male-dominated religions - blaming the "creation" of evil on women. These folks didn't miss a trick!

Gen 3:11-13 - He said, "Who told you that you were naked? Have you eaten from the tree of which I commanded you not to eat?" The man said, "The woman whom you gave to be with me, she gave me fruit from the tree, and I ate." Then the Lord God said to the woman, "What is this that you have done?" The woman said, "The serpent tricked me, and I ate."
Ah, the joys of "passing the buck"! The humans here both want to blame someone else for the problem. I wonder why it never occurred to either that maybe it could have been laid at God's doorstep for creating the problem to begin with.

Gen 3:14 - The Lord God said to the serpent, "Because you have done this, cursed are you among all animals and among all wild creatures; upon your belly you shall go, and dust you shall eat all the days of your life."
I guess this is supposed to imply that the serpent had legs before this episode, and I don't have much problem with such fancies. The problem I have is the idea that snakes eat dust. If the writer was trying to explain how the snake came to have the characteristics it had in the day this was written (probably around 500-400 BCE), why would he write about snakes EATING dust?

Gen 3:22,23 - Then the Lord God said, "See, the man has become like one of us, knowing good and evil; and now, he might reach out his hand and take also from the tree of life, and eat, and live forever"- therefore the Lord God sent him forth from the garden of Eden, to till the ground from which he was taken.
So even God admitted that the snake was telling the truth - that eating the "forbidden fruit" made the humans like God. However, an interesting new element is added - the idea that God was afraid they would also eat from a tree that had not been forbidden, namely the tree of life. One wonders what other weird plants God might have had lying around in this fantasy garden.

Gen 4:16,17 - Then Cain went away from the presence of the Lord, and settled in the land of Nod, east of Eden. Cain knew his wife, and she conceived and bore Enoch; and he built a city, and named it Enoch after his son Enoch.
Obviously, the creation story has left an awful lot out - as in where did Cain's wife come from? And why would Cain build a city, unless it was to house the families of many other people?

Gen 4:20-22 - Adah bore Jabal; he was the ancestor of those who live in tents and have livestock. His brother's name was Jubal; he was the ancestor of all those who play the lyre and pipe. Zillah bore Tubal-cain, who made all kinds of bronze and iron tools. The sister of Tubal-cain was Naamah.
This list of descendants looks an awful lot like the sort of things you find in many other mythologies. One person acts as a founder of such groups of people as "musicians" or "thieves." It's very primitive and simplistic, for instance, that I (as a musician, for instance) would be ultimately descended from Jubal, while my father (a machinist) would be descended from Zillah.

Gen 4:26 - To Seth also a son was born, and he named him Enosh. At that time people began to invoke the name of the Lord.
This is interesting in respect to the work of translation. In the English versions of the Old Testament, the word "Lord" most often is used as a translation of the Hebrew word "YHWH" (most often pronounced and written "Yahweh" and bastardized to "Jehovah"). So here, at the very beginning, we see the claim that people started calling God by the Hebrew name "Yahweh." This will be important later, in the book of Exodus.

Gen 5:22-24 - Enoch walked with God after the birth of Methuselah three hundred years, and had other sons and daughters. Thus all the days of Enoch were three hundred sixty-five years. Enoch walked with God; then he was no more, because God took him.
I mention this for a couple of reasons. First, it's part of the rather weird myths of the longevity of people in this part of the Bible. These legends had people living upwards of 900 years, an obviously ridiculous statement. Then, we come to Enoch, who never died, but was taken away by God. There's no telling what exactly this means, but the context seems to imply that Enoch was taken to heaven. This will also be interesting in conjunction with other verses later, in the NT.

Gen 6:4 - The Nephilim were on the earth in those days-and also afterward-when the sons of God went in to the daughters of humans, who bore children to them. These were the heroes that were of old, warriors of renown.
This is pretty much a copy from Greek mythology. The term "Nephilim" means "giants" or "Titans." We're talking here about the whole mythological "nine yards." Human/divine cross-breeding, resulting in heroes like Achilles and Hercules.

Gen 6:5,6 - The Lord saw that the wickedness of humankind was great in the earth, and that every inclination of the thoughts of their hearts was only evil continually. And the Lord was sorry that he had made humankind on the earth, and it grieved him to his heart.
We get into the idea of universal sin pretty early here. We see no clue as to how a perfect, omnipotent creator could create something that he would consider a "mistake."

Gen 6:14-16 - Make yourself an ark of cypress wood; make rooms in the ark, and cover it inside and out with pitch. This is how you are to make it: the length of the ark three hundred cubits, its width fifty cubits, and its height thirty cubits. Make a roof for the ark, and finish it to a cubit above; and put the door of the ark in its side; make it with lower, second, and third decks.
As I understand it, the cubits used in the Bible are 18 in, which makes the ark 450 ft. long, by 75 ft. wide and 45 ft. high. In other words, it was a bit smaller than the average modern oil tanker. Now, there's a pretty big problem with this scenario. Putting 1 breeding pair of every type of land animal found alive of Earth today in such a space would be impossible. There are other problems with the idea of protecting land-based life from a "universal" flood, such as protecting plants and water-based life unable to handle differences in salinity. Keeping all this alive for the better part of a year in such a space would be even more impossible. See the link below for more details on this.

Gen 6:18-21 - "...But I will establish my covenant with you; and you shall come into the ark, you, your sons, your wife, and your sons' wives with you. And of every living thing, of all flesh, you shall bring two of every kind into the ark, to keep them alive with you; they shall be male and female. Of the birds according to their kinds, and of the animals according to their kinds, of every creeping thing of the ground according to its kind, two of every kind shall come in to you, to keep them alive. Also take with you every kind of food that is eaten, and store it up; and it shall serve as food for you and for them."
This is a part of the instructions God gave to Noah. We're looking at a ridiculous order - 8 humans are supposed to care for a menagerie of every type of animal (logically, these animals would have to also be supporting a collection of all germs and parasites peculiar to their species). The writer was trying to cover all the bases he could logically think of in this myth, but it didn't work.

Gen 7:1,2 - Then the Lord said to Noah, "Go into the ark, you and all your household, for I have seen that you alone are righteous before me in this generation. Take with you seven pairs of all clean animals, the male and its mate; and a pair of the animals that are not clean, the male and its mate..."
I have several questions at this point. First, how did Noah happen to know what it took to be "righteous"? This was supposedly centuries before God bothered to tell people what the word meant (if he ever really did, that is). I'm especially curious about the distinction between "clean" and "unclean" animals. For one thing, those lists don't appear until Leviticus and Deuteronomy, in the dietary laws. I think they were supposed to be taken for anticipated sacrifices. Instead of having God kill them now, they'll be saved for killing later.

Gen 7:8,9 - Of clean animals, and of animals that are not clean, and of birds, and of everything that creeps on the ground, two and two, male and female, went into the ark with Noah, as God had commanded Noah.
Wait a minute! I thought we just went through this - that they were supposed to have 7 pairs of "clean" critters on the ark! How many times was the roster changed?

Gen 8:15-19 - Then God said to Noah, "Go out of the ark, you and your wife, and your sons and your sons' wives with you. Bring out with you every living thing that is with you of all flesh-birds and animals and every creeping thing that creeps on the earth-so that they may abound on the earth, and be fruitful and multiply on the earth." So Noah went out with his sons and his wife and his sons' wives. And every animal, every creeping thing, and every bird, everything that moves on the earth, went out of the ark by families.
It's pretty obvious that the writer of this story had no clue about the scientific errors here. The idea that all animals populated the Earth from the location of the point where the ark came to rest may have been feasible to the writer who was ignorant of the existence of Australia, America and the Pacific Ocean. His view of the world was far more limited than ours. Click here for a more detailed treatment of this subject.

Gen 8:21 - And when the Lord smelled the pleasing odor, the Lord said in his heart, "I will never again curse the ground because of humankind, for the inclination of the human heart is evil from youth; nor will I ever again destroy every living creature as I have done."
I have to question what the point could have been in destroying all animals in the process of destroying all humans. We can see the results of a lack of human imagination - a rather clumsy story that only "explains" the reason for rainbows; however, I would expect better from a perfect, omnipotent creator.

Gen 9:3-7 - "Every moving thing that lives shall be food for you; and just as I gave you the green plants, I give you everything. Only, you shall not eat flesh with its life, that is, its blood. For your own lifeblood I will surely require a reckoning: from every animal I will require it and from human beings, each one for the blood of another, I will require a reckoning for human life. Whoever sheds the blood of a human, by a human shall that person's blood be shed; for in his own image God made humankind. And you, be fruitful and multiply, abound on the earth and multiply in it."
Here's a confusing, stumbling start at developing a set of rules to live by. The interesting thing is, we're already into contradictions. In the story of Noah, we heard about animals being "clean" and "unclean," while here, we see that all animals are good for food. That will change when the dietary laws appear, but there's yet another problem! Not every animal can be eaten, as many animals are poisonous! Not much thought was put into that. And the rest of the passage is just as bad. Requiring the death penalty is a barbaric idea, and the reason given for it makes no logical sense.

Gen 9:24-27 - When Noah awoke from his wine and knew what his youngest son had done to him, he said, "Cursed be Canaan; lowest of slaves shall he be to his brothers." He also said, "Blessed by the Lord my God be Shem; and let Canaan be his slave. May God make space for Japheth, and let him live in the tents of Shem; and let Canaan be his slave."
I was always puzzled that when the Christian religion taught that all humans were related through one common ancestor, how could that religion support slavery? The writer here apparently had no problem with the idea, and thinks he's made a good job of explaining (maybe even justifying) the origin of slavery.

Gen 10:5 - From these the coastland peoples spread. These are the descendants of Japheth in their lands, with their own language, by their families, in their nations.
I found this interesting because it states that Japheth's family had its own language, and this was (according to the story) before the time of the Tower of Babel, where the "origin" of humanity's many languages was "explained."

Gen 12:11-16 - When he was about to enter Egypt, he said to his wife Sarai, "I know well that you are a woman beautiful in appearance; and when the Egyptians see you, they will say, 'This is his wife'; then they will kill me, but they will let you live. Say you are my sister, so that it may go well with me because of you, and that my life may be spared on your account." When Abram entered Egypt the Egyptians saw that the woman was very beautiful. When the officials of Pharaoh saw her, they praised her to Pharaoh. And the woman was taken into Pharaoh's house. And for her sake he dealt well with Abram; and he had sheep, oxen, male donkeys, male and female slaves, female donkeys, and camels.
Now we get into slightly less ridiculous myths (maybe), and more into legends. We were introduced to Abram (an odd name to give to a baby - it means "revered father"), who is ordered around by God for no particular reason stated in the story. Here, Abram acts in a rather selfish and stupid manner, thinking the strangers of Egypt will murder him on account of his wife. He apparently had no such prejudice when moving into Canaan. I wonder why?

Gen 12:18-20 - So Pharaoh called Abram, and said, "What is this you have done to me? Why did you not tell me that she was your wife? Why did you say, 'She is my sister,' so that I took her for my wife? Now then, here is your wife, take her, and be gone." And Pharaoh gave his men orders concerning him; and they set him on the way, with his wife and all that he had.
I have grave doubts that if such a thing would have happened in the real world. Any absolute ruler would have strung Abe up for such a sneaky trick - especially since he was just some guy wandering around the place and not involved in politics in any form.

Gen 13:14-17 - The Lord said to Abram, after Lot had separated from him, "Raise your eyes now, and look from the place where you are, northward and southward and eastward and westward; for all the land that you see I will give to you and to your offspring forever. I will make your offspring like the dust of the earth; so that if one can count the dust of the earth, your offspring also can be counted. Rise up, walk through the length and the breadth of the land, for I will give it to you."
Here's a promise from God to Abe. Note that at this point, there are no conditions. God promises to give the land to Abram's "seed" (as the Hebrew word literally translates) forever, and that said "seed" will be too numerous to count. This will change later - conditions will be added (the offspring will need to obey all the laws), and in the New Testament, Paul will try to warp this statement to mean that the promise was meant only for Jesus. Is that interesting, or what?

Gen 14:18-20 - And King Melchizedek of Salem brought out bread and wine; he was priest of God Most High. He blessed him and said, "Blessed be Abram by God Most High, maker of heaven and earth; and blessed be God Most High, who has delivered your enemies into your hand!" And Abram gave him one tenth of everything.
This is a very interesting passage, and one that has fascinated more than just me. The term "God most high" is not used anywhere else in the Bible. The writer of Hebrews considered it quite possible that Melchizedek was a very early appearance of Jesus. It's a pretty flimsy thing to hang a theology on, these 3 verses, but such is the religious mind!

Gen 15:6 - And he believed the Lord; and the Lord reckoned it to him as righteousness.
Another favorite line in the Christian world. We've seen how this guy, Abram (or Abraham - whatever) had very little in the way of moral rectitude, and this belief that God appeared to value so much didn't make any difference to Abe's behavior. So one has to wonder why the myth that religious faith and good behavior are related is so well-accepted?

Gen 15:8-12 - But he said, "O Lord God, how am I to know that I shall possess it?" He said to him, "Bring me a heifer three years old, a female goat three years old, a ram three years old, a turtledove, and a young pigeon." He brought him all these and cut them in two, laying each half over against the other; but he did not cut the birds in two. And when birds of prey came down on the carcasses, Abram drove them away. As the sun was going down, a deep sleep fell upon Abram, and a deep and terrifying darkness descended upon him.
That's odd - just 2 verses before this, it said that Abram believed God so strongly that God considered him to be righteous. Suddenly, he turns around and asks for proof that God's being on the level with him. Not much faith there, it seems. So how does God respond? He orders the slaughter of some animals and he puts Abram into a deep sleep for a nightmare. Makes perfect sense to me!

Gen 15:18-21 - On that day the Lord made a covenant with Abram, saying, "To your descendants I give this land, from the river of Egypt to the great river, the river Euphrates, the land of the Kenites, the Kenizzites, the Kadmonites, the Hittites, the Perizzites, the Rephaim, the Amorites, the Canaanites, the Girgashites, and the Jebusites."
Now, this is a different promise from God to Abram. The most important thing here is that the promise is for far more land for Abram's descendants. In fact, this promise is (unconditionally) for more territory than has ever been controlled by Jewish people, running from the Nile to the Euphrates rivers. I wonder why it might be that the Jews have never tried to cash in on this promise from God?

Gen 16:7-9 - The angel of the Lord found her by a spring of water in the wilderness, the spring on the way to Shur. And he said, "Hagar, slave-girl of Sarai, where have you come from and where are you going?" She said, "I am running away from my mistress Sarai." The angel of the Lord said to her, "Return to your mistress, and submit to her."
The Bible does seem pretty full of passages that support slavery, telling slaves to stay with their "owners," do all they are told to do, and act submissive. No wonder that slave owners made sure their "property" were thoroughly steeped in the Christian religion from the moment they were picked up!

Gen 17:10-14 - "This is my covenant, which you shall keep, between me and you and your offspring after you: Every male among you shall be circumcised. You shall circumcise the flesh of your foreskins, and it shall be a sign of the covenant between me and you. Throughout your generations every male among you shall be circumcised when he is eight days old, including the slave born in your house and the one bought with your money from any foreigner who is not of your offspring. Both the slave born in your house and the one bought with your money must be circumcised. So shall my covenant be in your flesh an everlasting covenant. Any uncircumcised male who is not circumcised in the flesh of his foreskin shall be cut off from his people; he has broken my covenant."
Well, the other shoe has apparently dropped! We've gone from unconditional promises from God to another sort of "contract." Now, in order to be considered a human party to the "contract," the males must participate in mutilation of their genitals. Nothing is said about the females, but that's hardly something to be surprised at - they were pretty much considered property, little better than slaves themselves. I note here that this set-up was stated as being "everlasting." Like many other passages in the Old Testament, this states explicitly that no changes will ever be allowed; that's something that the Christians tended to forget when they wanted to make changes. But that's another story!

Gen 18:20-22 - Then the Lord said, "How great is the outcry against Sodom and Gomorrah and how very grave their sin! I must go down and see whether they have done altogether according to the outcry that has come to me; and if not, I will know." So the men turned from there, and went toward Sodom, while Abraham remained standing before the Lord.
This sounds a little loopy to me - the idea of God (appearing as a human with a couple of "friends" at this time) having to travel with Abraham to see if what he's heard about Sodom and Gomorrah is true. After all, isn't God supposed to be omniscient and omnipresent?

Gen 19:4,5 - But before they lay down, the men of the city, the men of Sodom, both young and old, all the people to the last man, surrounded the house; and they called to Lot, "Where are the men who came to you tonight? Bring them out to us, so that we may know them."
All I can say is that Sodom must have been a really REALLY small and lonely place if every man in the whole city was keen on raping the two strangers! This sounds like hyperbole (poetic exaggeration) with the goal of demonization in mind. It certainly seems to have worked for an awful lot of people!

Gen 19:6-8 - Lot went out of the door to the men, shut the door after him, and said, "I beg you, my brothers, do not act so wickedly. Look, I have two daughters who have not known a man; let me bring them out to you, and do to them as you please; only do nothing to these men, for they have come under the shelter of my roof."
Lot certainly had an interesting idea of what it took to be a good host! Strangers were protected at all costs, while his daughters were only good to use as a diversion. Interestingly enough, Lot was called "righteous" by Paul in the New Testament. I personally don't think much of him as a role model!

Gen 19:30-33 - Now Lot went up out of Zoar and settled in the hills with his two daughters, for he was afraid to stay in Zoar; so he lived in a cave with his two daughters. And the firstborn said to the younger, "Our father is old, and there is not a man on earth to come in to us after the manner of all the world. Come, let us make our father drink wine, and we will lie with him, so that we may preserve offspring through our father." So they made their father drink wine that night; and the firstborn went in, and lay with her father; he did not know when she lay down or when she rose.
This had to be one of the most serious drinking episodes on record! The problem, as I understand it, is that being so deeply blasted as to affect one's memory, it's pretty unlikely that sex could occur. Of course, Lot could have only said he remembered nothing, thus allowing later writers to call him a righteous man!

Gen 20:1,2 - From there Abraham journeyed toward the region of the Negeb, and settled between Kadesh and Shur. While residing in Gerar as an alien, Abraham said of his wife Sarah, "She is my sister." And King Abimelech of Gerar sent and took Sarah.
You'd think Abe would have been broken of this habit by this time. Still, the old tricks are often the favorite ones! Oddly enough, this story took place between the births of Ishmael and Isaac - when Sarah was at least 85 years old!

Gen 20:10-12 - And Abimelech said to Abraham, "What were you thinking of, that you did this thing?" Abraham said, "I did it because I thought, There is no fear of God at all in this place, and they will kill me because of my wife. Besides, she is indeed my sister, the daughter of my father but not the daughter of my mother; and she became my wife."
Well, we certainly have a moral gem here from Abe! He tells lies and has no problem with marrying his half-sister, and he thinks his hosts are evil because they don't have the same religion that he has! The thing that's quite disturbing here is that Abraham is considered one of the top people in the Bible, though I can't for the life of me figure out why!

Gen 21:14,15 - So Abraham rose early in the morning, and took bread and a skin of water, and gave it to Hagar, putting it on her shoulder, along with the child, and sent her away. And she departed, and wandered about in the wilderness of Beer-sheba. When the water in the skin was gone, she cast the child under one of the bushes.
OK, here's a little trivia question. How old was Hagar's child Ishmael when she put him on her shoulder next to her water skin and wandered into the desert? According to Gen 16:16 Abe was 86 when Ishmael was born. In this chapter, when Isaac is born, Abe is listed at 100 years, making Ishmael 14. I don't know - you think he might have been a little big to carry on mommy's shoulder and store under a bush?

Gen 22:1-3 - After these things God tested Abraham. He said to him, "Abraham!" And he said, "Here I am." He said, "Take your son, your only son Isaac, whom you love, and go to the land of Moriah, and offer him there as a burnt offering on one of the mountains that I shall show you." So Abraham rose early in the morning, saddled his donkey, and took two of his young men with him, and his son Isaac; he cut the wood for the burnt offering, and set out and went to the place in the distance that God had shown him.
This is one of the most terrifying things I've ever read in the Bible. Abraham has a son, no more than a little kid, and he has no problem with being ordered to slaughter and burn that son! In fact, his willingness to commit such a horrible crime is held up as the most noble and heroic ideal believers can hope to achieve! It's things like this that make me happy I found my way out of the madhouse that is religion!

Gen 22:7-10 - Isaac said to his father Abraham, "Father!" And he said, "Here I am, my son." He said, "The fire and the wood are here, but where is the lamb for a burnt offering?" Abraham said, "God himself will provide the lamb for a burnt offering, my son." So the two of them walked on together. When they came to the place that God had shown him, Abraham built an altar there and laid the wood in order. He bound his son Isaac, and laid him on the altar, on top of the wood.
I can just picture this! If such a thing actually happened (and it's not very likely at all, from what I've seen), one can hardly imagine the deep emotional scar that would have been carved through the mind of a young child in this position! Yet, there are still lots of preachers who use this story to teach how good it is to follow all of God's orders!

Gen 22:15-18 - The angel of the Lord called to Abraham a second time from heaven, and said, "By myself I have sworn, says the Lord: Because you have done this, and have not withheld your son, your only son, I will indeed bless you, and I will make your offspring as numerous as the stars of heaven and as the sand that is on the seashore. And your offspring shall possess the gate of their enemies, and by your offspring shall all the nations of the earth gain blessing for themselves, because you have obeyed my voice."
So that was the point here? Abraham scares his toddler son witless, coming within inches of slaughtering him, tied and laid out on a pile of firewood, just so God could reward him with the same bloody promise that he'd already made a dozen times before this? This has become an awful, horrible story! Certainly not "the greatest story ever told"!

Gen 24:12-14 - And he said, "O Lord, God of my master Abraham, please grant me success today and show steadfast love to my master Abraham. I am standing here by the spring of water, and the daughters of the townspeople are coming out to draw water. Let the girl to whom I shall say, 'Please offer your jar that I may drink,' and who shall say, 'Drink, and I will water your camels'-let her be the one whom you have appointed for your servant Isaac. By this I shall know that you have shown steadfast love to my master."
Well, we have a weird new way to relate to God here! Isaac has to identify himself to God, tell God where he is, and tell God what he expects to happen! Of course, the scenario he lays out was perfectly ordinary, so I have to wonder why he didn't think it was entirely possible for his "script" to be played out as coincidence, with no real action on God's part?

Gen 26:1 - Now there was a famine in the land, besides the former famine that had occurred in the days of Abraham. And Isaac went to Gerar, to King Abimelech of the Philistines.
Does anyone else reading this (if anyone reads it, of course) think it just a teensy bit odd that this "land flowing with milk and honey" should have experienced so many famines and droughts?

Gen 26:3-5 - "Reside in this land as an alien, and I will be with you, and will bless you; for to you and to your descendants I will give all these lands, and I will fulfill the oath that I swore to your father Abraham. I will make your offspring as numerous as the stars of heaven, and will give to your offspring all these lands; and all the nations of the earth shall gain blessing for themselves through your offspring, because Abraham obeyed my voice and kept my charge, my commandments, my statutes, and my laws."
God really gives us a continuity problem here. He says that Abraham followed all his statutes, laws and commandments, which is odd, considering that the laws, commandments and statutes won't even start to be given (according to Exodus and the other books) for another several centuries!

Gen 27:27-33 - So he came near and kissed him; and he smelled the smell of his garments, and blessed him, and said, "Ah, the smell of my son is like the smell of a field that the Lord has blessed. May God give you of the dew of heaven, and of the fatness of the earth, and plenty of grain and wine. Let peoples serve you, and nations bow down to you. Be lord over your brothers, and may your mother's sons bow down to you. Cursed be everyone who curses you, and blessed be everyone who blesses you!" As soon as Isaac had finished blessing Jacob, when Jacob had scarcely gone out from the presence of his father Isaac, his brother Esau came in from his hunting. He also prepared savory food, and brought it to his father. And he said to his father, "Let my father sit up and eat of his son's game, so that you may bless me." His father Isaac said to him, "Who are you?" He answered, "I am your firstborn son, Esau." Then Isaac trembled violently, and said, "Who was it then that hunted game and brought it to me, and I ate it all before you came, and I have blessed him?-yes, and blessed he shall be!"
This is an interesting story, one that makes little sense. Jacob tricks his father into thinking he's Esau, thus stealing the father's blessing - as if that would make a difference in future events! Did these people think that God followed Isaac's orders and arrange events around to fit with this blessing? It looks like we have a good example of what I like to call "magical thinking" - thinking in terms of magic that has no real connection with the real world, or any real internal rules to speak of.

Gen 28:12-15 - And he dreamed that there was a ladder set up on the earth, the top of it reaching to heaven; and the angels of God were ascending and descending on it. And the Lord stood beside him and said, "I am the Lord, the God of Abraham your father and the God of Isaac; the land on which you lie I will give to you and to your offspring; and your offspring shall be like the dust of the earth, and you shall spread abroad to the west and to the east and to the north and to the south; and all the families of the earth shall be blessed in you and in your offspring. Know that I am with you and will keep you wherever you go, and will bring you back to this land; for I will not leave you until I have done what I have promised you."
God's back to giving promises again. Note here again that the promise is unconditional and for a multitude of descendants. Today, many Christians are using this passage to say that God promised to return the nation of Israel, assuming that the word "you" was used in a plural sense. Later passages will expand on this "return" concept.

Gen 28:20-22 - Then Jacob made a vow, saying, "If God will be with me, and will keep me in this way that I go, and will give me bread to eat and clothing to wear, so that I come again to my father's house in peace, then the Lord shall be my God, and this stone, which I have set up for a pillar, shall be God's house; and of all that you give me I will surely give one-tenth to you."
Jacob didn't have much in the way of expectations from God, did he? All he asked for was food to eat and clothing to wear (things he'd had all his life, anyway) and in return he promised to give 10 percent of everything he owned to God. And how would he do that? Why, just the same way all the other heathens in the vicinity did - by burning the goods he was "giving" to God, most likely at the phallic symbol of this pillar he set up for God's home!

Gen 30:37-39 - Then Jacob took fresh rods of poplar and almond and plane, and peeled white streaks in them, exposing the white of the rods. He set the rods that he had peeled in front of the flocks in the troughs, that is, the watering places, where the flocks came to drink. And since they bred when they came to drink, the flocks bred in front of the rods, and so the flocks produced young that were striped, speckled, and spotted.
This is more fantasy from ancient times. The natural effect (appearance of recessive traits) was attributed to non-natural causes (magical influences of striped sticks). This is a common problem with religious thought, and the error wasn't discovered until science stepped in to show the real cause of things like this.

Gen 31:10-13 - During the mating of the flock I once had a dream in which I looked up and saw that the male goats that leaped upon the flock were striped, speckled, and mottled. Then the angel of God said to me in the dream, 'Jacob,' and I said, 'Here I am!' And he said, 'Look up and see that all the goats that leap on the flock are striped, speckled, and mottled; for I have seen all that Laban is doing to you. I am the God of Bethel, where you anointed a pillar and made a vow to me. Now leave this land at once and return to the land of your birth.' "
These people put an awful lot of stock in getting information from the supernatural realm through dreams. For many people, this belief that dreams are (at least potentially) means of communicating with God or dead ancestors or whatever. It's a rather quaint belief, but there's no evidence for any validity of such a thing happening. I've personally heard lots of people tell me stories about talking with God in their dreams, but they never have a story that leads to any sort of point. On another point on this passage, it looks like Jacob (later named "Israel" or fighter of God) is already returned to the land of Canaan, using up this particular promise of return from God.

Gen 32:24-30 - Jacob was left alone; and a man wrestled with him until daybreak. When the man saw that he did not prevail against Jacob, he struck him on the hip socket; and Jacob's hip was put out of joint as he wrestled with him. Then he said, "Let me go, for the day is breaking." But Jacob said, "I will not let you go, unless you bless me." So he said to him, "What is your name?" And he said, "Jacob." Then the man said, "You shall no longer be called Jacob, but Israel, for you have striven with God and with humans, and have prevailed." Then Jacob asked him, "Please tell me your name." But he said, "Why is it that you ask my name?" And there he blessed him. So Jacob called the place Peniel, saying, "For I have seen God face to face, and yet my life is preserved."
Did Jacob actually wrestle with God in the form of a man? He certainly seems to have thought so. He also named a place in honor of this mythical struggle and talking face to face with God. The writer here looks to be trying to dance around the issue, implying much, but saying actually nothing concrete. Such is the material theologians love to wrangle over!

Gen 34:6,7 - And Hamor the father of Shechem went out to Jacob to speak with him, just as the sons of Jacob came in from the field. When they heard of it, the men were indignant and very angry, because he had committed an outrage in Israel by lying with Jacob's daughter, for such a thing ought not to be done.
Excuse me? How could anyone have committed an "outrage in Israel" when the nation known as Israel was generations away from being created? This sounds like the Israeli writer of this story had lost sight of the basic premise of his story!

Gen 34:24-27 - And all who went out of the city gate heeded Hamor and his son Shechem; and every male was circumcised, all who went out of the gate of his city. On the third day, when they were still in pain, two of the sons of Jacob, Simeon and Levi, Dinah's brothers, took their swords and came against the city unawares, and killed all the males. They killed Hamor and his son Shechem with the sword, and took Dinah out of Shechem's house, and went away. And the other sons of Jacob came upon the slain, and plundered the city, because their sister had been defiled.
Here's another "heroic tale" from the ancient legends of the Semetic people. It certainly can't be something that anyone would seriously believe! Imagine two men with swords attacking an entire city full of men. Even if they were hurting from the sexual mutilation of circumcision, I expect that in an entire city, there would be no few who would be able to defend themselves or at the very least, escape!

Gen 35:9,10 - God appeared to Jacob again when he came from Paddan-aram, and he blessed him. God said to him, "Your name is Jacob; no longer shall you be called Jacob, but Israel shall be your name." So he was called Israel.
Jacob must not have been a very bright lad, if he had to be notified by God in person a second time! And we might as well start taking note of all the people in the Old Testament who saw God in person - it'll be on a test at the end!

Gen 35:27 - Jacob came to his father Isaac at Mamre, or Kiriath-arba (that is, Hebron), where Abraham and Isaac had resided as aliens.
Here's a neat little tidbit . It's a clue to the true author of this book - and it wasn't Moses, as tradition holds! Here, we see this place called "Hebron," which is the name given to the place at some time during the nationhood of Israel. Moses had no way of knowing the name of the place so far into his future, and he certainly had no reason to think calling this place by that name would mean anything to anyone who might read it before that place received the name.

Gen 38:6-10 - Judah took a wife for Er his firstborn; her name was Tamar. But Er, Judah's firstborn, was wicked in the sight of the Lord, and the Lord put him to death. Then Judah said to Onan, "Go in to your brother's wife and perform the duty of a brother-in-law to her; raise up offspring for your brother." But since Onan knew that the offspring would not be his, he spilled his semen on the ground whenever he went in to his brother's wife, so that he would not give offspring to his brother. What he did was displeasing in the sight of the Lord, and he put him to death also.
Thus begins the religious crusade against masturbation! This is the only Bible passage that comes close to condemning this completely harmless activity, yet think of all the pain and self-loathing that has come about because of it!

Gen 38:15-18 - When Judah saw her, he thought her to be a prostitute, for she had covered her face. He went over to her at the roadside, and said, "Come, let me come in to you," for he did not know that she was his daughter-in-law. She said, "What will you give me, that you may come in to me?" He answered, "I will send you a kid from the flock." And she said, "Only if you give me a pledge, until you send it." He said, "What pledge shall I give you?" She replied, "Your signet and your cord, and the staff that is in your hand." So he gave them to her, and went in to her, and she conceived by him.
This is a pretty puzzling story from the Old Testament, but one that is very instructive. Judah thought this woman was a prostitute and had sex with her. What this doesn't mention is that her disguise was as a temple harlot (qadeshah), and Judah was participating in a rather ordinary (at that time), socially acceptable practice of worshipping the fertility gods of his time and place. If you read the whole story, you'll see that Judah had no qualms about talking about this religious practice, and no one got upset at it, apparently including God.

Gen 38:24-26 -About three months later Judah was told, "Your daughter-in-law Tamar has played the whore; moreover she is pregnant as a result of whoredom." And Judah said, "Bring her out, and let her be burned." As she was being brought out, she sent word to her father-in-law, "It was the owner of these who made me pregnant." And she said, "Take note, please, whose these are, the signet and the cord and the staff." Then Judah acknowledged them and said, "She is more in the right than I, since I did not give her to my son Shelah." And he did not lie with her again.
So all's well that ends well, I guess! Judah was more than willing to burn this woman for stepping out of line, thinking she'd had sex with any old guy. Once it was clear that she'd stayed "in the family," the problem went away, and absolutely nothing is said about his part in this interesting story!

Gen 41:37-43 - The proposal pleased Pharaoh and all his servants. Pharaoh said to his servants, "Can we find anyone else like this-one in whom is the spirit of God?" So Pharaoh said to Joseph, "Since God has shown you all this, there is no one so discerning and wise as you. You shall be over my house, and all my people shall order themselves as you command; only with regard to the throne will I be greater than you." And Pharaoh said to Joseph, "See, I have set you over all the land of Egypt." Removing his signet ring from his hand, Pharaoh put it on Joseph's hand; he arrayed him in garments of fine linen, and put a gold chain around his neck. He had him ride in the chariot of his second-in-command; and they cried out in front of him, "Bow the knee!" Thus he set him over all the land of Egypt.
Here's another quite unlikely fairy tale from the Hebrew mind! Joseph interprets a dream and is instantly accepted by this unnamed Pharaoh as the best person to act as Secretary of State to handle the long-term crisis! But keep reading --things get weirder!

Gen 42:6 - Now Joseph was governor over the land; it was he who sold to all the people of the land. And Joseph's brothers came and bowed themselves before him with their faces to the ground.
As I said, it's pretty weird, from a realism point of view. Here, we see how Joseph went about his duties as administrator for a nation's food supply. The writer, completely oblivious of how ridiculous it sounds, tells us that Joseph was the man who acted as the food dispenser for everyone in the land, and that's how he came to have his brothers bowing to him as his dream so long before had foretold. For simple, desert-dwelling itinerants, this story was probably quite believable. After all, they hardly ever saw groups of people more than a thousand strong at a time. However, any person familiar with how things are done in large communities knows how badly this story misses the believability mark.

Gen 43:11 - Then their father Israel said to them, "If it must be so, then do this: take some of the choice fruits of the land in your bags, and carry them down as a present to the man-a little balm and a little honey, gum, resin, pistachio nuts, and almonds.
More continuity problems here! It amazes me to think that this family could have all these neat food-stuffs to carry off as gifts - in the middle of a 7-year famine!

Gen 43:32 - They served him by himself, and them by themselves, and the Egyptians who ate with him by themselves, because the Egyptians could not eat with the Hebrews, for that is an abomination to the Egyptians.
I think it's quite possible that the writer has once again gotten ahead of himself historically. I find it pretty hard to believe that the Egyptians had any societal rules dealing with social interaction with Hebrews, since the claim appears later on that there were a grand total of 70 people in the entire "nation". If the Egyptians had rules against eating in the presence of any outsiders, I could understand this passage, but that's not what it says.

Gen 44:4,5 - When they had gone only a short distance from the city, Joseph said to his steward, "Go, follow after the men; and when you overtake them, say to them, 'Why have you returned evil for good? Why have you stolen my silver cup? Is it not from this that my lord drinks? Does he not indeed use it for divination? You have done wrong in doing this.' "
Isn't it interesting that Joseph, who was brought up in the house of Jacob to adulthood, should use a cup in the practice of divination? It's just a little clue, among many, that the religion of the ancient Hebrews was far from being all that different from the other multi-theist, "pagan" religions of the surrounding area.

Gen 46:26,27 - All the persons belonging to Jacob who came into Egypt, who were his own offspring, not including the wives of his sons, were sixty-six persons in all. The children of Joseph, who were born to him in Egypt, were two; all the persons of the house of Jacob who came into Egypt were seventy.
OK, so here, we have a starting point for the story of the Exodus. There's more strange things coming in the legend of the Hebrew sojourn in Egypt!

Gen 47:15-17 - When the money from the land of Egypt and from the land of Canaan was spent, all the Egyptians came to Joseph, and said, "Give us food! Why should we die before your eyes? For our money is gone." And Joseph answered, "Give me your livestock, and I will give you food in exchange for your livestock, if your money is gone." So they brought their livestock to Joseph; and Joseph gave them food in exchange for the horses, the flocks, the herds, and the donkeys. That year he supplied them with food in exchange for all their livestock.
Once again, I'm wondering at what could possibly have been going through the mind of the writer here? Surely, in the middle of a famine, the animals would be eaten, rather than exchanged for stored grain? I mean, we're not talking Hindi here, who are strict vegetarians, by and large! Then later, after this passage, we're treated to hearing how Joseph completed the turning of the tables, by making every person in Egypt his slave when they were no longer able to buy grain with their possessions!