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Fiction

Spurned by Letterman. A lesson in how persistence can turn months of rejection into a minor success followed by more months of rejection. Raises the question: should I continue to characterize this CBS Top Ten Contest as "lame" and "rigged?"

Pope and Friends at the Gate. A joke featuring Terri Shiavo, Johnny Cochran, Frank Perdue, Karol Wojtyla, and Saint Peter. A collaboration between Gene Weingarten and J. W. Johnston.

The Lights Are On. Peter Thalweg's humor column.

Ha!kus. Humorous haikus composed mainly to lighten up the Poetry.com Haiku Contest.

JW's Celestial Emporium of Benevolent Photography. Ansel Adams meets John Wilkins meets Homer Simpson. A photography site.

Bush Administration Headlines - Post 2004. As penned by Madam Strabismus (a.k.a. "Happy Entrails") in response to Adam Felber's challenge (see NOV 5).

Lim'rickpalooza. A veritable gaggle* of limericks by the Bard O' Nantucket.

*gaggle n: (a) A collection apt to make one gag or giggle, (b) A flock of limericks.

The Adventures of Captain Quidnunc in Scriptographic Limbo. The one and only comic adventure by the overlooked (and misunderstood when not being overlooked) A. Lapdog. About the evil geniuses behind the Cqahywm Terrorist Network and the women who loved them. A classic*.

*In other words, really old.

The Great Divide. My submission to the 2004 Chicville Creative Writing Contest. A parable set in the umbra of the Rocky Mountains exploring the great social divides of the day. WARNING: MAY IMPAIR ABILITY TO LAUGH.

No, No Nanite. A high tech romp that unravels the unlikely connections between Fluffy the cat, insects, quantum mechanics, klezmer-bluegrass music, nanorobots, and a cadre of eccentric West Virginians.

In Vitro: Genesis. A novel chronicling 21 days surrounding the birth of In Vitro Intelligence--an Artificial Intelligence poised to radically transform the future. The action propels the characters to the brink of the Singularity--an approaching event about which Vernor Vinge writes in “The Coming Technological Singularity” (1993):"... we are on the edge of change comparable to the rise of human life on Earth. … this change will be a throwing away of all the previous rules, perhaps in the blink of an eye, an exponential runaway beyond any hope of control. … [The Singularity] is a point where our old models must be discarded and a new reality rules."

East Wing. Follows the exploits of a colorful team of national forestry service workers based in Mew National Forest, West Virginia--a place falling within the National Radio Quiet Zone. Base of operations is the East Wing of the Robert C. Byrd Municipal Building.

Desperate Comedy Writers. Screenplay about a neighborhood filled with unemployed screenwriters who have no credits and questionable talent, but are all improbably good looking.

BattleBlogs! Flamewars for chatbots. Hosted by Dr. Alan Tarring, professor and AI researcher at Pignut Mountain Community College. What you get when you cross BattleBots with Mystery Science Theater, You Bet Your Life, and the Loebner Prize Contest.

Non-fiction