Just TOO
Much
...
Saturday, December 1, 2007
I have a little foible (well, I have lots and lots
and lots of them, but right now I am considering one in
particular). Excess of almost any sort
turns me off. For example, I
love food, and I like food in restaurants that is
presented well. However, when I go to restaurants where
the quantities are excessive or on the rare occasions I find myself
at buffets where there are huge vats of food in row upon
row, I truly lose my appetite. I love chocolate above all
other foods. The first time we went on a Holland America
cruise and I attended their Dutch Chocolate Treat, I thought I
might throw up.
My aversion to
excess extends to all manner of things. I don't
like excessively ornate architecture or overly decorated
interior designs; if I had my way, our house would be virtually
empty of everything except the most functional furniture and lots of
books. I don't like theme parties, with all their
decorations. The very idea of a costume party would make me break
out in hives, except for the fact that nobody I know would even think to
invite me to such thing, so I don't worry about it too much. I
don't like huge gestures: extravagant gifts, public displays of
affection, just about anything done purely for "show". I
also do not like excessively loud places or people.
It should be
obvious by now where I am going with this. The Holidays are upon
us. I always used to love Thanksgiving because it involved some of
my favorite foods (dressing and cranberries) and was very simple.
I was never a huge fan of Christmas because, in America anyway,
Christmas is sort of all about excess. I usually managed to carve out a
few little traditions that I could enjoy and I ignored all the other
hoopla. Now that "The Holidays" have turned into a Season that
stars with Halloween and ends with the Super Bowl, I have all I can do
to endure it, and there is virtually nothing about it I enjoy.
If it were
just me, I would hole up in my house writing when I am not at work, and
literally avoid The Holiday Season altogether. I have no real
objection to other peoples' excesses [.... well, actually I do, but I
understand that I have no right to dictate to others, so I try not to
rant about that too much].
The problem
is, it isn't just me (the fact of which I constantly have to remind
myself!!) My family and friends get into the Holiday mood. DH and
Daughter Dear love to decorate the house. They put up a tree
and hang lights outside. DH never fails to get mad when I gush
about how wonderful the house looks after he puts away the decorations.
I've learned not to say "The house looks so great without all that shit
everywhere," but he knows that is implied in my enthusiasm for our
post-holiday return to normal.
I used to feel
obligated to "help" put up the decorations because I was uncomfortable
with the implied criticism that I'm a lazy no-good Scrooge if I didn't
help. However, after something like 15 years of "helping" and
arguing the whole time, I quit. DH puts up the decorations when I
am not around. If I am home when he takes the notion to decorate,
I leave. I know he still thinks I'm a lazy no-good Scrooge, but
that's better than actually behaving like an evil
witch sucking all his pleasure out of the decorating
process.
For me sort of
every day I spend in my home with my family is an occasion for
Thanksgiving and Celebration. I really don't need "Special
Holidays". I realize that puts me out-of-synch with 99% of the
rest of humanity, and 100% of my family and friends.
I try. I
really do try not to spoil the fun for others, but the more excessive,
over-the-top and unrelenting the Season becomes, the more turned off I
am by it. With each year, it becomes harder and harder for me to even
pretend to go along so as not to spoil others' fun.
I pity the
poor people who have to deal with me between Halloween and the Super
Bowl. I'd love to spare them the misery. I'd love it if they
could simply leave me out of their Holiday plans
altogether. I'd love to be able to leave today for a month-long
retreat and come back after the worst is over.
Obviously that
is not going to happen. So, I will just have to deal with it as
best I can. This year, as every year, I will spend my holiday trying not
to poop on somebody else's
party.