Writer's Notes: This is a character background for a Gurahl (were-bear). More specifically, it's written from a very nonhuman POV; that of a Siberian polar bear, and her way of seeing things.
I not sleep well anymore.
Not for many seasons.
I have bad night visions--they keep me from sleeping like I used to.
Because of them. Humans. They came to snow lands, my lands. They brought their horrors--their bad night visions. Their horrors became mine, and I Raged.
The Rage is awake. . . in my blood still.
And now I not sleep well. . . .ever again.
I born in winter. All Ice-Stalkers born in winter. I born to my Mother--me and my den-sister. My Mother a good mother; good hunter, good teacher. She keep us warm, and not-hungry--me and sister, sleeping together next to her fur. I stronger than my sister--but my Mother very good hunter; my sister no die, grow strong too. But not as strong as me.
We grow--for three seasons. Three winters. Mother had just gone away; it was mating time. Me and sister still together--we share kills, we keep away bigger others. We not yet want to be alone.
Then we saw humans. Strange, upright spindly things. Seemed easy to catch and eat, but smelled bad. Very bad. . . smelled of dead things and corruption. With the sound of thunder, they kill my sister. Thunder strike me too, hurt my muzzle, my eye. They try to eat my sister, and the Rage makes me bigger and bigger, so that I kill them and their bad thunder. I do not eat them. They taste bad.
I was stronger than my sister--now I am alone.
Soon, other Ice-Stalker find me. Human Ice-Stalker--but he no smell bad. Smell. . .curious. He heal my eye. He say that he want to show me many, many interesting things. I bored with my snow; I want to see other snow. I go.
He take me to land-snow. Teach me how to change into small, weak upright form. Teach me other things: fixing hurts, spirit-speak. I play with human cubs--they loud, but interesting to be with. They call me--Svetlana Kalistravda. Humans like hard names. But they smell. . . .okay.
After some seasons, I grow impatient. I am older, and it grow close to mating-time. I thank teacher, Gregor Black-Paw, and go back to the ice. Back to my snow.
No humans. I hunt there. I sleep there. When I want, I take mate. I have cubs, strong cubs. I am Mother to my cubs.
One winter, when I awake, there are humans. On the land-snow. They make many bad smells--and the smell of death-and-not-eaten in my territory. I am curious why they kill and do not eat. I go, and watch.
I watch human starve human.
I watch human beat human.
I watch human mate unwilling not-heat-female.
I watch human put other humans in small boxes.
I watch human freeze other human in boxes.
I watch outside humans do nothing. I watch them avoid the boxes.
I watch human kill us, and no eat. Take the fur and leave good food for black-scavenger-birds.
I watch humans kill humans--many, many, and not for food, or mate, or cubs.
For no reason.
I watch for a season. I wait for humans to be angry, to fight free. Even seals do that. But they no be angry. They die--the smell is worse--the horror seeps from smoke into me with the many wasted human death-cries. The Rage inside me grows strong and fat. I grow bigger, and stronger, and go into the death-boxes at sun-go-down. I kill all humans that are free. I change into spindly human form, and break death-boxes--all the humans run out. They are skinny, sick--I take all to clean snow. Some die, and the others are stupid--will no eat them. They like cubs--clumsy and do not hunt. I hunt for human cubs. I lead them across ice-snow. They follow, like small fox follow me. I lead my smelly human flock to another human flock--across ice-snow.
I tell other flock to take this one. They know a Ice-Stalker command--they take others in. I watch and hunt--give food until the melt-season. Then I leave.
Rage does not stay quiet. It give me night-visions. So I go into long-sleep, to quiet the Rage.
Bear woke me, many seasons later. Told me human evil had spread to ice-snow. Told me dead-but-not-dead human killing the snow, putting humans and Ice-stalker and seal all in one big death-box. Showed me the spirit-death-box that closed my snow. Gave me Ice-Stalker command, from others--break outside the spirit-death-box; go outside, to land-with-no-snow. Tell the Changers. Have them break the box.
I go--Ice-Stalker do no say ‘no’ to other Ice-Stalkers.
I go to wolf-changers. They help me break the spirit-death-box--up high on ice-snow, where it weak. I thank, then leave across ice.
I walk on ice, and swim in water. Long, long time I walk. But I strong. I make it to land-snow. Then I walk again, to land-with-no-snow. I find other Changers, and tell them. They no listen. So I walk more--to tell Changers that listen.
I still walking. But I miss snow.
And I not sleep well.