2003-2006 Compilation Album


				*Gregory Urman Online* *2003-2006 Compilation Album*



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Originals

1. Gray
2. Freak Like Me
3. Amy Works on Colfax
4. The Grieving Song
5. Break the Loop
6. Star in Heaven
7. Growing Up in Hell
8. Long Hard Road
9. Medication Song
10. The Waiting
11. Walking to the Moon
12. Take a Chance on You

Covers

13. Northern Star
14. Mad World
15. Disarm
16. Under the Bridge
17. Don’t Let it Bring You Down

Poems

1. Razorblade Smile
2. Day 412
3. Yelling at the Empty Space
4. We Cannot Be Friends
5. The Funeral

Waltzes

6. Fur Elise
7. The Midnight Rose
8. Short Waltz (in Am)

Gregory Urman

A Compilation Album: 2003-2006

Original Songs, Covers,

Waltzes and Poetry

www.myspace.com/gregoryurman

http://home.earthlink.net/~gurman

(Lyrics, poetry, biography, etc)

Written by Gregory Urman

Gray

from the album 2005 EP

And the days turn weeks and the sky’s still gray
And I don’t belong and I’m not okay
And I’m sick of this things just won’t work out
I’m alone again it just never stops
There’s a hole inside and it just won’t close
Not a thing has changed except my clothes

I don’t dare to dream ‘cause the waking hurts
I don’t dare to love, she wants someone else
There has got to be a way to part these clouds
There has got to be a way to stop the pain
Stop the pain

And the months turn years and the sky’s still gray
And I don’t belong and I’m not okay
And I’m sick of this things just won’t work out
I’m alone again it just never stops
There’s a hole inside and it just won’t close
Not a thing has changed except my clothes

CHORUS

And I’m looking back, it’s not all a waste
I’ll convince myself it will be okay
And I don’t know why, I just know I’m sick
But I hope there’s time, and I want to change

Gregory Urman

Freak Like Me

from the album EXILE IN DENVER

I see her crying by the river

I want to wipe away her tears

I want to love her, to forgive her

But she's betrayed me all these years

I see her walking in the silence

I see the pain that's in her eyes

And I know that I am just like her

And there's nowhere for us to hide

And you're a freak like me

And we could be happy

But you just run from me

But you just run from me

And her long hair is very pretty

Her beauty is there to disarm

But she won't let you any closer

And she cannot undo the harm

And we both hate our families

Do not where we fit in

Do not know which way to go

We just feel so small

And you're a freak like me

And we could be happy

But you just run from me

But you just run from you

And you're no good for me

And I'm no good for me

And can we ever be

Happy? Happy?

And I just walk alone

We'll see where I will go

We'll see I do not know

We'll see I do not know

Written by Gregory Urman

FROM THE ALBUM 2005 EP

My little protest to poverty, corruption, and exploitation.

Amy Works on Colfax

Amy works on Colfax and she’s pretty but she’s tainted
Amy works on Colfax ‘cause there’s nowhere else to go
You and I both know that someday they will break her
But no one will cry because to them it’s just a show

Chorus #1:
‘Cause Dad’s on meth and Mommy’s gone
And no one ever gave a damn
When schools are broke, they call it S.O.L.
‘Cause Dad’s on meth and Mommy’s gone
And no one ever gave a damn
When life’s too busy for a second chance.

Amy works on Colfax and she’s pretty but she’s tainted
There are cops around but there is nothing they can do
She will never have a boy come up and say “I love you”
She can never smile, but she sure can bend a spoon

Chorus #2:
‘Cause Dad’s on meth and Mommy’s gone
And no one ever gave a damn
And there’s no hope, but there is hell to pay
And children follow your mistakes
Unless you learn to act your age
But change is hard, and we all know it’s true

Amy works on Colfax and she’s pretty but she’s tainted
Amy’s walked her last, but all the streets remain the same
No one will remember, and no one here will miss her
Life goes on and silence is her grave

Chorus #3:
And Amy’s dead and Amy’s gone
And no one ever gave a damn
This kind of thing just happens everyday
And Amy’s dead and Amy’s gone
And no one ever gave a damn
You know he stabbed her 20 times
You know, you know, you know
He got away

Gregory Urman

The Grieving Song

from the album EXILE IN DENVER

And she’s been six feet under for a year now

And grandma isn’t coming back and it is just as well

She never found her peace

But I can give her my forgiveness

‘Cause there’s no point in anger

No undoing, just regret

I’m grieving for the empty space

You left inside of me

I’m grieving for the happiness

That never got to be

I’m grieving for a family

Without the picket fences

I’m grieving for a childhood

That I cannot forget

And there a million memories

But very few are good ones

And I am from a family

Destroyed by their divorce

And mommy has her bruises

While my dad has his neglect

And grandma had three strokes

That all the doctors can’t correct

I’m grieving for my poverty

And all the shame it brings me

I’m grieving for security

That I have never had

I’m grieving for that house back there

Forever filled with conflict

I’m grieving for the isolation

You can’t understand

But years have passed and I am growing older

I do not want this burden

And I want to find some love

I cannot find my happiness

If I’m remaining frozen

I can’t forget

But now I must move on

Gregory Urman

Break the Loop

from the album 2005 EP

And today’s like every day

And I’m going home okay

And I’m going home alone

And another month is gone

And you feel like breaking down

But you rise to fall again

And you feel like nothing’s changed

And you wonder who to blame

... and it feels like home again (4x)

And it hurts to try

I don’t want to trust

And I’m stuck like this

And the cycle’s spinning down

And I question every movement

And I question every second

And I’m frightened and I’m powerless ...

And it feels like home again

And I want to change! (4x)

Gregory Urman

"Star In Heaven"

Oh, you star in heaven
Why don’t you come down?
Under your light
In pain I drown
Tried to live without you
But it doesn’t work
Tried to find another
But I can’t let go

Like the sun, you blind me daily
Like the moon, you light my sky
I can feel my heart, it’s failing
‘Cause I know that you’re not mine

Oh, you tricky devil,
You are killing me
Oh, my beauty, treasure
We will never be
Love you more than ever
Run but cannot hide
I am yours forever
I have lost my mind

CHORUS

I can’t stand this anymore
I don’t want to live this way
Everything is turning black
My star shines too far away

My star shines too far away

Gregory Urman
05/18/03

“Growing Up in Hell”

Intentionally done from a child’s perspective

I’m all alone, safe in my room
Mommy’s at work, grandma’s asleep
I’m all alone, toys in my room
They are my friends, there’s no one else

Little children, giant buildings
Uniforms in blue
Too damn smart and too damn weak
What’s a boy to do?
Scary teachers, broken flowers
Silence is my friends
There is no one here to like me
No one understands

I’m all alone, stuck in my room
Mommy’s at work, grandma’s asleep
I’m all alone, toys in my room
They are my friends, there’s no one else

Daddy’s here and mommy’s crying
He found someone else
I don’t think you even love me
You just like to yell
Grandpa died, there’s no more stories
Every day alone
And I hear my mother calling
Won’t you let me go?

I’m all alone, I hate my room
Mommy’s at work, grandma’s asleep
I’m all alone, toys in my room
They are my friends, there’s no one else

I left my room, I grew up
We moved here and I met you
I have my friends, I have a chance
I have a chance, I do

Gregory Urman
02/04/04

Long Hard Road

This is a more realistic look at romance, especially since we approach Valentine's Day. Also, I think I've played Alanis' "Precious Illusions" a few times too many.

And I won’t be your Knight in Shining Armour
And you won’t be the way to end my pain
We have to start like fools and then grow smarter
I know it’s hard, but there’s no other way

‘Cause it’s a long, hard road when the fantasy ends
And it’s a long, hard road ‘til we find real friends
We try so hard, but happy days are numbered
And we get up and try again, we close the cuts
and try again. Or else, you don’t
But there’s no reset button

And all the pain I’ve felt has made me stronger
I still need help, I’m still alone, I still can’t see ahead
And we won’t kiss, and I won’t spend the night
But I can learn, move on, and I try again

‘Cause it’s a long, hard road when the fantasy ends
And it’s a long, hard road ‘til we find real friends
We try so hard, but happy days are numbered
And we get up and try again, we close the cuts
and try again. Or else, you don’t
But life goes no without you

Gregory Urman

03/21/05

Medication Song

Hi, my name is “So Bi-polar”

Hi, my name is “Thorazine”

Look at me, you see disorder

You don’t see a human being

How do explain attraction?

How do you explain my mood?

Math and chemical reaction

There’s no choice in what I do

... fallen ... cannot get up

... fallen ... how can I stop? (2x)

Take a pill, forget your troubles

Take a pill to dull your pain

Writing at 3:00 in the morning

I cannot control my brain

CHORUS

What to do when pills stop working?

What to do? It’s all the same

Take a pill instead of kindness

Take a pill instead of love

Take a pill to forget friendship

Take a pill to become God

Gregory Urman

The Waiting

Watch the world float by

Watch your dreams, they die

Watch the things you've workef for

Shatter at your feet

Watch the girl you love

Vanish overnight

Waiting for the future

Waiting for a sign

I'm wearing out the rug with all my pacing [echo: pacing]

I'm falling to my knees from all the weight that's on my back

There's all this past but there is no erasing [echo: erasing]

There's all this fear that love is the one thing I can't get back

I'm waiting for the world to come to order

I'm waiting for the light to shine again

I'm waiting but I just keep growing older

Hoping that it isn't all too late

I'm waiting but then I am slowly changing

I'm waiting but I'm busy every day

I'm learning now to like myself ... it's difficult

I do not want to live inside my head

CHORUS

Gregory Urman

Walking to the Moon

And I walk towards the moon

but it seems so far away

And I'm searching hard for you

and I struggle every day

And I don't know where I am

And I don't know what's to come

What to do or not to do

Doubting every God above

I know I'll be good to you

I know I can make you smile

Want to help and care for you

If you let me stay a while

And there's no such thing as perfect

But I think there's something better

Something real and something vulnerable

Something worthy to remember.

And I walk towards the moon

And I think I'll be there soon

And I'm ready and I'm trying

And I know I'll find my way

Gregory Urman

07/25/05

Take a Chance on You

I met her on a day that seemed like every other day

But time has proven it was something different

I met her and I knew just what to say

And my skin fit just fine and hers as well

Take a chance on you, It is time, it is time for something new (2x)

And I’ll treat you like an equal because you deserve to be

And I can’t control the future, but right now I guarantee

I belong with you, and you belong with me.

And time has passed, we know each other better

And we are not the same, but each day we both learn

And I know you can break my heart, and you know I can too

But we must take that chance or else our lives remain the same

PRECHORUS and CHORUS

And we’re waking up one morning and the light is on her face

I have found myself some beauty, I’m am happy, I am safe

And she’s staying here for breakfast and it’s just how it should be

And another day has happened, I’m alive and I am free

PRECHORUS and CHORUS

COVER SONGS: TO BE ADDED LATER

POETRY: [backing music by Gregory Urman]

Gregory Urman
      09/09/04

Day 412

Is it day 412, or is it day 420?
Is it just year 2, or year 21?
The downward spiral keeps on winding
The days all bleed together
       but the loneliness remains

And I'm tired all the time
Tired of waking up
         to a world that does not change
         to a girl who isn't there
Work and class and test and drive
What's the fucking point?
Try to change, then change some more

Will it be enough? Will somebody notice?
Will I make her smile? Can she make me think?
Does she have a boyfriend? can that guy be me?
Will I kiss her somewhere down the line?

But the girl is married
      and the party's over
No one liked the new shirt
No one cares if you lost weight
Possibilities are gone
          ... going home alone again

And it hurts so badly
And I don't know what to do
Faith without experience?
... Even harder than it sounds
Feeling small and powerless
Feeling like I'm falling ...

Wake up, it is day 500
It is still that hard, but I'm still here trying
You can't meet a girl when you're
       locked inside your room
You can't quit, can't die,
       then the world would win.

Gregory Urman
05/20/04

Yelling at the Empty Space

AKA track 2 of my "2005 EP"

Walk the streets or lie in bed,
I still feel the same
Years went by and nothing’s changed
Feels like something’s missing

I am tired of whispering:
“Everything will be okay”
Everything will fall apart
and the hole reopens

Emptiness inside my heart,
Emptiness around me
I don’t know what I’ve done wrong
Don’t know how to change
There’s no girl and there’s no home
Joy is always fleeting
Safety’s but a dream

Want to break, then break down crying
Don’t know where to turn
Hope that this will pass me by
Yelling at the empty space

Gregory Urman

07/13/05

We Cannot Be Friends

I.          I ran into you today and wish I didn’t

There’s so much I want to say but it’s too late

Every time I see your face, the memories flood back

Every time I see your face, I try again in vain

II.        Try to treat you like an equal

But you close your mind to me

Try to find what we are missing –

And it’s chemistry

There are things I can’t take back

And there are things you cannot give

And I wish we could be friends

But there are things I can’t forgive

III.       There’s no peace for us

And there’s no restoration

There are promises

That time won’t let us keep

There’s a voice inside

That says that “I still love you”

There’s a voice inside

That says “I wish you did”

IV.       I see you with somebody else

And I get jealous

I look right into your eyes

And see a stranger

I still care for you

And think I always will

You’re imprinted on my soul

Like iron brands

Like a cow that has

No choices of its own

Like a dream that stays

With you as you grow old ...

V.        It is time for something else

It is time for different days

Time to find somebody else

Not repeat the same mistakes

Gregory Urman
04/25/04

The Funeral

He put a record on and slit his wrists
And closed his eyes imagining the crowd
Of those he loved, of those that failed him
Of those who should have loved him back
But they were blind

And he was right, but they were also mad
And mommy died in traffic later
And daddy drank himself to death
But nothing changed
The girl moved on and married someone else
The grave grew old and then became neglected
They threw away the bathtub
But bought another soon
But he would never see it
But he would never know

And it is easier to die than change
To fight the pain, hold on another moment
The panic takes its hold and there’s nowhere to run
The pattern does not stop, you want it all to end
Can’t see a future that is different than today
Cannot imagine feeling safe or happy
But you don’t know what lies beyond the hill
You close your eyes, but there’s no coming back
And I am just as clueless, but I’m trying
So, don’t let go. The razorblade can wait.