By: Tyson Wolf   Rated G

It was a Saturday night, and the Monkees had just finished playing a gig at a night club. It was late, and they were all ready to go home. Just then, a little man came running over to them. "You guys did a great job!" he said.
"Thanks" said Mike. The four of them started to leave, when the man called out to them. "I know something!" he said.
"What?" Mike asked. "That the Beatles are right across the street!" he said, pointing out the window.
"The Beatles?" Peter asked. "Boy it would be great to see the Beatles!" Micky said. "Come on let's go!"
The Monkees all walked across the street to hopefully see the Beatles. Luckily they were still there. They were getting ready to go home too.
"There they are!" said Micky. The Monkees walked over to them, not sure what to say.
John Lennon looked up. "Looks like we've got some fans who want autographs" he said to the others.
Paul McCartney looked up too. "Hi there" he said.
"Um, hi" Mike said. "Hi!" Micky said. "We're the Monkees!"
All four Beatles looked at each other.
"The Monkees?" George Harrison asked.
"That's right!" Peter said.
"We like your music" Ringo Starr told them.
"You do?" Davy asked. "Yeah, we do" Ringo said.
Soon everyone began talking about music.
Micky called to Ringo, and lead him back to a corner.
"I just thought we could talk drummer to drummer" Micky said.
"Alright" Ringo said.
"So, um, what's it like being a Beatle?" Micky asked.
"It's great." Ringo replied "What's it like being a Monkee?"
"Great!" Micky said. After that, Micky seemed deep in thought, while Ringo was looking off into the distance.
"Hey!" Micky said, all of the sudden, causing Ringo to jump.
"What?" the British drummer asked.
"I just had a great idea!" Micky said. "How about you and I switch places!"
"What?" Ringo asked, sounding confused.
"You know, we could switch groups!" Micky continued "Then you could see what it's like being a Monkee and I could see what it's like being a Beatle! What do you think?"
"Well" Ringo began, "I guess that would be alright. But what would the others think?"
"We'll tell 'em!" Micky said, sounding excited. "Come on!"
Micky and Ringo went over to their bands to ask them what they thought.
"Guys!" Micky said "Guess what!" He told the others of his idea, while Ringo was telling the Beatles.
"Micky thinks it would be fun if we switch groups" he said.
"Sounds fine to me" Paul said. "Me too" said George. "What about you John?" Ringo looked up at John, and asked him what he thought.
"I say go for it" John said.
"Thanks" Ringo said.

After getting some things from the hotel where they were staying, Ringo was ready to go. So was Micky.
Ringo looked around the Monkees' pad and they said he could sleep in Micky's bed. "Let's watch a movie" Davy said, turning on the TV. Davy was the only one really watching the movie, Mike was half watching, half working on his new song. Peter wasn't watching at all. He was in another world, thinking about who knows what. Ringo watched some of it, but it was late, and he was soon asleep. Once the movie was over, Peter turned to Ringo. "Hey Ringo" he said softly. "It's time to go to bed" Ringo woke up, and everyone got ready for bed.
"Good-night Ringo" Peter said. "Good-night" Ringo said back.
Peter and Ringo were in the downstairs room, while Mike and Davy were upstairs.
The next morning at the Beatles' hotel, Micky was telling them about a movie he saw.
"It was great!" he said "To bad you guys were asleep and missed it"
"Well we were tired" said George, who was reading the newspaper.
"Yeah, it had been a hard day's night" said Paul, who was in the kitchen making coffee.
"It's been a hard day's night, and I've been working like a dog!" sang John, who was in the bathroom, combing his hair.
"Don't get him started!" said George. Everyone laughed at that.
Then John came out of the bathroom. "I heard that" he said.
"Your hair looks good" said Micky, who was still laughing.
"Here, you can comb your hair now" John said to Micky.
"Oh thanks, but I've already combed mine" Micky said.
"That's the thing with you Micky" John said "No one could tell if you've combed it or not"
George and Paul laughed. Micky just looked up at his curly top.
"Yeah, I guess you're right" he said, smiling.

The next day at the Monkees' pad, right after breakfast, Mike, Davy and Peter went out to the store while Ringo stayed home to rest. He hadn't slept well the night before.
Then there was a loud knock at the door.
"Let me in!" the man on the other side demanded.
Ringo woke up and went to answer the door.
"Who's there?" he asked with a yawn.
"Little Red Riding Hood" the man said.
Ringo quickly opened the door, only to be disappointed by the Monkees' landlord, Mr. Babbit.
"Won't you come-" Before Ringo could finish what he was saying, Babbit had walked in.
"What a mess!" Babbit said.
"Well I-" Once again, Ringo was cut off by Babbit.
"Who are you?!" he wanted to know.
"Ringo."
"Ringo?" Babbit said "Who's Ringo?"
"Ringo Starr. I'm a Beatle!"
"What are you doing here?" Babbit asked.
"I'm kind of staying with the Monkees for a while" he said.
"Oh. Well, you tell the boys that I'll be back next week to collect the rent" Babbit told him. "By the way, where are the boys?"
"They went out" Ringo said.
"Well, when they get back tell 'em that! Babbit said. "And tell 'em to clean up! This place is a dump!"
"I don't think it's a-" Before Ringo could finish, Babbit had walked out.
Ringo looked around the pad. It wasn't a dump, but it could use a little cleaning. So he decided to pick up some things before the guys got back.
When they did come home, they found Ringo dusting a table.
"Oh hi guys!" he said.

"What are you doing?" Mike asked.
"Cleaning." Ringo answered "A man came here and said the place was a mess, and that he'll be back next week to get the rent."
"Babbit" the three Monkees said together.
Later that day, they were going to be practicing a song, but since they didn't have Micky, it was up to Ringo to sing.
"I can't sing!" he said.

"Well you've got to sing!" Mike told him "Now come on and sing. So many people say that, they say 'I can't sing' but everyone can sing."
"It's just that some people sound better then others!" Davy said, laughing.
"Cut it out Davy!" Mike said. "Come on Ringo!"
"Oh alright." Ringo said. He let out a sigh and then started to sing.
"I thought love was only true in fairy tales" he sang.
"Hold it!!" Mike said, cutting Ringo off. "Let's do a song that Micky doesn't sing!"
Meanwhile, at the Beatles hotel, Micky was having better luck singing.
"I'm so glad, that she's my little girl. She's so glad, she's telling all the world" they all sang.
Micky was having a great time, singing with the Beatles.
"I'm in love with her and I feel fine!"

The next day, the Monkees and Ringo decided to go to the mall.
"How does this look?" asked Davy, who was holding a shirt up to himself. "Looks fine to me" Peter said.
Ringo had walked off, to look at something else.
There was a couple in the store. The man was probably in his early forties, and looked strong and trough. The woman was in her late thirties, and had long blond hair. She was a lovely woman. They had been watching Ringo for a few minutes.
Then they walked over to him.
"Nice rings" the woman told him. "Thank you" Ringo said shyly.
After looking around for a while, Mike, Davy, Peter and Ringo decided to go home. The couple had followed them outside.
"You got their license plate number?" the woman asked her husband. "Got it" he said.
"We'll go to their house tonight, and get that boy and his rings!" she said.
"Right. We'll take him back to the building and tie him up! And then, well you know" said the man.
"Yes, I know" said the woman, who was smiling.

That night when everyone was asleep, the couple from the mall, whose names were Ralph and Eva, had broken into the Monkees' pad. Lucky for them, the door was unlocked.
Eva had a flashlight, and Ralph had a small rope.
They went into the downstairs bedroom, where Peter and Ringo were. In one bed was Peter, fast asleep. And in the other bed was Ringo. "That's him" Eva said. "You sure?" Ralph asked. "Of course" Eva answered. "Now let's get him!"
Eva pulled back the sheets, but Ralph hit his knee on the side of the bed. Ringo opened his eyes to find the couple looking down at him. But before he could say anything, Ralph put his heavy over Ringo's mouth, and Eva tied his wrists together. Ralph then picked him up, and carried him out to their car.
Once outside, Ralph tossed him in the back.
"Where are you taking me?" Ringo wanted to know.
"Shut up!" Ralph told him. Then he pulled a bandanna out of his pocket and tied it around Ringo's mouth to keep him quiet.
"We'll make a few more stops and then go home" Eva said.
"Right" Ralph said.
Then they drove off.

The next morning when Peter woke up, he saw that Ringo was gone. He got dressed, and went into the kitchen, thinking Ringo would be there.
"Ringo?" he called out.
Then Mike and Davy came down.
"Mornin' Pete" Mike said. "Good morning Peteh" Davy said.
"Hey guys" Peter said. "What are you lookin' for?" Mike asked.
"Ringo" Peter replied. "Ringo?" Davy said. "What happened to Ringo?"
"Well when I woke up, he wasn't there" Peter said "And I've been looking all over for him. I even looked outside, but he's not there"
"Maybe he went home" Davy said.
"I don't think he'd do that without sayin' something first" said Mike. "Now, let's look around for, I don't know, a note or something"
"Alright" Davy and Peter said together.
Once in the bedroom, the three of them looked around.
"Here's something!" said Peter, who was holding up a note.
"It's just got some address on it" said Mike, who had taken the note.
The thing was, last night Ralph had accidentally dropped a piece of paper with the address of he and Eva's building on it.
"Well, maybe if we find this place, we'll find Ringo" Davy said.
"I think we should show this to the other Beatles and Micky first" Mike said.
So, the three of them went over to the Beatles hotel.
"Can't buy me love, everybody tells me so, can't buy me love" Paul sang.
"This is great!" Micky said.
But their song was cut short when there was a knock at the door.
"More fans" John said.
"I'll get it" said Micky, as he opened the door "Hi guys!"
"Hi Mick" Mike said quickly. "Look, we came over here to tell y'all something"
"What is it?" George asked. "Ringo's gone!" Peter said.
"Gone?" said Paul "What do you mean gone?"
"We couldn't fine him anywhere!" Mike said "But we found this note"
John took the note and read it.
"Never heard of it" he said.
Paul, George and Micky looked at it too.
"I think Ringo might have been kidnapped!" Peter said.
"Why would anyone want Ringo?" John asked.
"Never mind that!" Mike said "I think we should go to that place and see if Ringo's there!"
"I have a funny feeling something's happened to him too" George said.
"Well then by all means, let's go!" Paul said.
"Come on!" Mike said to the others.
"Poor Ringo" said Davy "He must be scared!"

Once they had arrived at their building, Ralph opened the back door and pulled Ringo out.
By then, Ringo had lost the bandanna Ralph put over his mouth.
"Where are we?" Ringo asked, sounding nervous.
"Don't worry about it" Eva said to him.
Ralph grabbed him by the back of his shirt and led him inside.
They took him to a small room and untied his hands.
"Thank you!" he said happily. "Shut up" Ralph said to him.
Eva grabbed his hands and pulled his rings off, rather roughly too. Then she put the rings into a small velvet bag, and went to the back and returned with a small wooden chair and more ropes.
"What are you doing with my rings?" Ringo asked.
"Don't worry about them" Ralph said "You won't miss them"
"Sit down!" Eva ordered. "But I-" Ringo began.
Ralph pushed him down in the chair, and then tied his hands behind his back.
"What are you doing to me?" Ringo wanted to know. "And why do you want my rings?"
"We're going to sell your rings!" Eva said. "And as for you, well we have our ways of keeping people quiet"
Ringo didn't answer, and Ralph and Eva started up a game of cards.
"What's your name?" Eva asked him.
"Ringo Starr"
The couple looked at each other.
"I've heard your name somewhere" Ralph said. "Are you an actor?"
"I'm a singer" Ringo said. "Well, I don't sing much, but I'm in a band. The Beatles"
"Oh yeah, that's right" Eva said.
After that, everyone was quiet.

Meanwhile, the Monkees and three Beatles had found the building. "This is it" Davy said.
"Yep" Mike said "Let's go in"
The seven of them went inside and looked around.
"I wonder if there's a phone here" Paul said.
"Why?" John asked.
"Maybe we can call the kidnappers and get them out of the room for a while, so we can get Ringo" he said.
"First we need to find a phone book, and hope that they have a phone with 'em!" Mike said.
After looking around a bit, they found everything they needed
"Who's going to call?" Davy asked.
"How about Micky?" George suggested.
"I'll do it!" Micky said.
"Use your kidnapper voice" Davy said.
"I will" Micky said as he picked up the phone.
Back in the room, Ralph and Eva were in the middle of a card game, when Eva turned to Ringo.
"Hey Rings" she said.
"Yes?" he said.
"I was just wondering, have you got any more rings or jewels on you?" she asked.
"No" he replied.
"Where there's four rings, there's more rings" Ralph said.
"My thoughts exactly" said Eva, as she got up and started to untie Ringo.
"Get up!" she told him.
Ralph came over and pulled him up.
She then took off Ringo's jacket and looked though all of the pockets, then she tossed it on the floor.
"Hey, that's dry clean only!" Ringo said.
"Shut up" Ralph told him.
Then she started to unbutton his shirt!
"What are you doing!?" he asked.
"Just stand still" she ordered "I'm looking for more goods"
"But I haven't got anything else" he said.
"Be quiet" Ralph said.
Then the phone rang, and Eva stopped what she was doing while her husband answered the phone.
"Hello?" he said. "Who? You want us to come where? Right now?"
Little did any of them know that it was Micky on the other line, pretending to want to meet the couple somewhere.
"Oh alright" said Ralph "We'll be right over. Good-bye"
"Who was that?" Eva asked. "Someone who wants to meet us across town" Ralph said "He said he knows us, but I didn't recognize his voice"
"Well, we've met a lot of people Ralph" Eva said "We probably do know him"
"You're right" he said "Let's go"
The two of them left Ringo standing there, and locked the door on their way out.

Paul had been looking around for Ringo, and found the room.
Not knowing if anyone was in there or not, he knocked on the door.
"Who's there?" Ringo asked.
"Paul"
"Paul who?"
"Paul McCartney" he said, as he opened the door "Why do you ask?"
"Because I thought this might be some sort of joke!" Ringo said. "Boy Paul, am I happy to see you!"
"You too" Paul said. He then noticed that Ringo's jacket was on the floor, and that his shirt was half unbuttoned.
"What happened to you?" he asked.
"Eva was looking for more rings!" Ringo explained "And she took my jacket off, and she was starting on my shirt! I'm glad the phone rang, because who knows what else she would have taken off!"
Paul told him that it was Micky on the phone, and learned about Ralph and Eva.
"Let's get out of here!" Paul said.
"I'm with you!" Ringo said.
He got his jacket and buttoned his shirt back up, and the two of them left the room.
But Ralph and Eva were coming back! They had forgotten to get something from the room.
They ran into Ringo and Paul.
"It's you!" Eva yelled "How did you get out?! And who is this!?"
"This is Paul McCartney" Ringo told her.
"I don't care who he is!" Ralph shouted "Get back to the room!! Both of you!"
Paul and Ringo looked at each other, then Paul started singing,
"Get back, get back to where you once belonged."
"Enough!" Eva said "Get back!!"
Ralph pulled out his gun and pointed it at them!
Paul stopped singing, and they were lead back into the room.
Once there, both Ringo and Paul were tied up.
Ralph and Eva played another card game.

"Where are they!" John wanted to know. "Paul's been gone forever!"
"Not forever" George said. "Well it feels like it" John said back.
"I think something’s happened to 'em!" said Mike "I'd better go lookin' for 'em"
"I'll come with you" Davy said. "Me too" said Micky.
"So will I" John said. "George, you and Peter stay here"
The four of them took off, leaving Peter and George behind.
"Hi" said Peter, trying to start a conversation.
"Hi" George said before looking away. It was his way of saying 'I don't feel like talking'
So they just stood there, waiting for the others to return.

"Maybe they're in here." John said, pointing to a door.
"Maybe" Mike said "And there's only one way to find out."
John opened the door to find Ringo and Paul tied up.
"Ringo! Paul!" Micky said. "Hi guys!" Davy said.
"Hello boys" Eva said "You know them?"
"Yeah, we do" Micky said.
Soon, John, Mike, Micky and Davy were tied up too.
But while John was being tied up, he kicked Ralph in the leg.
Ralph stepped on John's foot.
"Are there four Beatles?" Ralph asked.
"Yeah, George Harrison isn't here" Ringo said. "And there are four Monkees too. Peter's not here. But they're in the building"
"Thank you" said Eva, as she and her husband got up to find the other two.
"Good going" John said, giving Ringo a funny look.

Soon, the husband and wife team had found George and Peter.
"You must be them!" she said. "Them who?" Peter asked.
"Peter and George" Ralph said "You'll be coming with us!"
"You two must be the kidnappers!" George said.
"Smart boy" Eva said. "Now come on!"
George tried to hit Ralph, but missed terribly.
"Ha!" Ralph laughed.
They returned to the room and tied George and Peter up with the others.
"Hi guys" Ringo said.
"Hi Ringo" Peter said.
Ralph and Eva had to go out for a while. They locked the door, even though they knew there was no way the boys could get out.
"Be good!" Eva called out before closing the door.
The eight of them all sat in wooden chairs, with their hands tied behind their backs.
Paul, George and John sat across from Peter, Ringo, Micky, Davy and Mike.
Ringo let out a sigh.
"At least we're all here together" he said.
"True" said Peter.
Everyone was silent after that, until Peter said,
"We can't give up! Nothing's happened yet!"
"Of course nothing's happened yet" Paul said "Nobody's said anything"
"Well that's probably just fine with George" John said "You know, he's the quiet one."
"Will you quit picking on me just because I'm quiet!" George told him.
"Well George, you are pretty quiet" Ringo said.
"Why don't you keep out of this shorty!" George said.
"Shorty!?" Ringo asked.
Paul laughed.
"Yes, shorty" said John "What he lacks in height he makes up for in nose"
"Now that's not nice!" Ringo said "What about your nose!?"
"I have a nice nose" John said back. "And not only that, you can't sing ether!"
"And you can?" George said.
"Why don't you just go back to being quiet?" Paul said. "And John, quit being mean to Ringo!"
"Don't tell me what to do!" said George "And John can be mean to Ringo if he wants"
"Hey!" said Ringo.
John, George and Ringo were all making cold comments about each other, and Paul just sat there and watched for a few minutes, then he spoke up.
"You know" he said "If John had it all his way, he would change the name of the group to 'John Lennon and the others'"
George and Ringo agreed with Paul, and now the three of them were ganged up on John.
The Monkees sat there quietly. But by now, the Beatles were yelling so much, that you could no longer hear what they were saying.
Enough was enough.
"QUIET!!" Mike yelled, getting everyone's attention.
"What?" John asked.
"This has been goin' on long enough" he said. "All of this fighting, it's stupid. I don't even remember what started the fight."
"I do!" said Peter.
"I wouldn't say anything Pete" Micky whispered "Just let it be"
"Now I want y'all to stop it" Mike said "Right now"
"He's right" Paul said "This is crazy, all this fighting over nothing. I'm sorry"
"I'm sorry too" George said.
"So am I" Ringo said. "What about you John?"
All eyes were on John.
"Yes" He said "Ringo, your nose isn't that big"
"All come on John" said Ringo "Who has a bigger nose then me?"
"Pinocchio" John replied.
Everyone laughed.

After the fight, everyone was quiet for a while.
Peter noticed that Ringo was looking at something.
"What do you see?" he asked.
"I was just looking at that phone over there" Ringo said "Maybe we can call the police"
"Call the police!?!" Mike yelled "How can we call anybody bein' tied up like this?"
"I guess it would be a long distance call." John said calmly.
Micky laughed.
"Hey, I've been working-" George began.
"Like a dog" John interrupted.
George gave him a funny look. "As I was saying, I've been working on my ropes, and I think I've almost got them!"
"That's great!" Micky said.
"I've got them!" George said showing off his now free hands.
"I wanna be free!" Davy said.
"I'll get you" George said, as he was untying Paul.
After everyone was untied, Paul called the police.
"Tell 'em about my rings!" Ringo told him.
"I will!" Paul said, as he was trying to talk.
"Are they coming?" Micky asked, after Paul had hung up.
"They'll be right over" he said.
Just then, Ralph and Eva walked though the door!
"How did you get out!!?" Eva yelled "And what are you doing with the phone!?"
"I'll bet they were calling the police on us!" said an angry Ralph.
Thinking quick, Paul told the couple, "No, I haven't called them yet. But I was getting ready to"
"Well you can just forget about that!" Ralph said "Back into your seats!"
This time it was Eva who pulled out a gun!
The couple backed the eight singers up against the wall.
"Please don't shoot!" Peter begged.
"I won't shoot if you do what you're told!" Eva said.
John kicked Ralph in the leg again.
"I've had it with you!!" Ralph yelled, as he pushed John up against the wall.
But John took a swing at Ralph! And knocked him out!
Ralph fell to the floor.
"My husband!" Eva shouted, as she got down by her husbands side.
Mike and George took this as the perfect opportunity to grab her.
"What are you doing to me!!!" she yelled, as she was being picked up.
"Take it easy shotgun!" Mike told her.
"Don't let her kick me!" Micky said.
"Yeah, she's got high heels" said Ringo.
George and Mike put her in one of the chairs and tied her up.
"See how it feels to be tied up?" said Davy.
"Come on!" said Mike "Let's get Ralph too"
They lifted him off the floor and tied him up too.
"You'll be sorry!!" Eva told them.

The police came, and the couple was arrested. Turns out the police had been looking for them for a while.
"I got me rings back!" said Ringo.
"That's great!" said Peter.
"Yeah, and we've got our Ringo back" said Paul.

The eight of them went back to the Monkees' pad to rest for a while.
"Hey guys" Micky said to the Beatles "Can I talk you outside?"
"Sure" John said, as he Paul, George and Micky walked outside.
Once outside, Micky said, "I've had a great time with you guys. But, well, I want to go back to my own group"
"That's good" John said "We're ready for you to go"
"Ignore him" said George "We've had fun with you Micky"
"Yes we have" Paul agreed "But we miss Ringo"
"We do?" John asked.
"Yes. We do" Paul said "Good-bye Micky"
"Good-bye Micky, take care" George said.
"Bye" John said.

Inside, Ringo was having the same talk with Mike, Peter and Davy.
"We've had fun Ringo" Peter told him.
"Yes, we have" Davy said "We'll miss you"
"Yeah, you're a good kid" said Mike "But Micky's part of the group"
"Oh, I was never going to take Micky's place" Ringo said "But I had a great time. Until I got kidnapped"
"Take care Ringo" Peter said.
"You too" Ringo replied.
"Hey guys!" Micky said, as he and the other three Beatles walked though the door. "We've been talking"
"So have we" Mike said.
"Probably about the same thing" George said.
"Yeah" said Peter "I think so"
"Welcome back Mick" said Mike.
"Thanks guys" Micky replied "Hey, what about my stuff? It's still at the hotel!"
"We'll go get it" John said "We need to go back anyway"
"But we aren't going there" Davy said.
"Well, I was thinking we could take that car of yours there" John said.
"We can all go!" Peter said "Is that alright Mike?"
"Sure" Mike said "You can drive my car"
"Baby" John said.
Everyone laughed.

Once back at the hotel, Micky got his stuff and hopped back into the car.
The Beatles had gotten out, and were standing on the sidewalk.
"Have a safe trip home" Peter said.
"Thank you" Paul said "You too"
"Hey, send us a postcard when you get back" Micky said.
"We will" Ringo said "You send us one, too"
"You got it!" Micky answered.
"Thanks!" Ringo said "I love postcards!"
"We know" John said.
They all said their good-byes again, and the Monkees drove off.

"I'm glad we're all alright" Peter said "Eva and Ralph scarred me"
"Well, it's OK Pete" Mike said "They're in jail now, Ringo got his rings back, and we're all fine"
"You know" Davy said "They never seemed really all that happy. You know, we everything they had, you think they're be happy"
"Yeah I guess" said Peter.
"Well" said Mike "I guess it's like what the Beatles say"
"What do the Beatles say?" Micky asked.
"Money can't buy you love." Mike answered.
That gave the others something to think about, as they continued their way down, 'The Long and Winding Road'.

The End

By: Larrysgirl, Mickys411, Kari and Tyson Wolf   Rated G

Micky slowly sat up and rubbed his eyes. Why did the morning come so early, he thought to himself. Putting his feet on the floor, he looked at the clock and then at the calendar pinned up on the wall by the headboard of his bed. He looked at the calendar for several seconds, wondering why the date looked familiar. Then it hit him...today was his birthday!
"Today's my special day!" Micky thought to himself. Smiling brightly he quickly got up, washed, dressed and headed down the hurricane stairs to the kitchen. Mike, and Davy were already there having coffee. Peter was frying eggs.
"Morning, guys!" Micky said happily.
"Wow, you're up earlier than usual." Mike remarked taking a sip of his coffee.
"We didn't have to use dynamite to get him out of bed either." Davy added.
"Well, it 'is' a special day today." Micky said, raising his eyebrows.
"What's so special about Tuesday?" Peter asked as he put the eggs on everybody's plates.
"Yeah, it's Tuesday, March eighth." Mike said, taking a bite of his eggs. "No gig tonight, the rent is paid up for the month."
"Tonight is a half-moon, though." Peter put in.
"Yeah, Mick." Davy said, looking at Micky, "What's so special about today?"
Micky looked at his friends in shock. He waited for some sign that they were kidding, that they knew it was his birthday, but they simply stared back at him. Finally, he stabbed at his eggs.
"Nothing, fellas, I was just kidding." He said quietly.
The other three Monkees said nothing as they all continued to eat their breakfast.
After breakfast, Mike washed the dishes, then went to tune his guitar, Davy called his "new" girlfriend Tammy, Peter was playing a game of cards with Mr. Schneider the dummy, and Micky was reading a book entitled "How to build items out of toothpicks and paper plates.”
As he read, Micky began to hum a tune, which was Happy Birthday.
"Hmmmm Hmmmmmmm hm hm hmmmm hmmmmmmm hm hm," he went.
"Say Mick, you think you can keep the humming down,” said Mike, “I need concentrate on tuning my guitar."
"Sorry," said Micky.
He then whistled Happy Birthday.
"Hey Micky, keep the whistling down, I'm on the phone," said Davy.
Once again, Micky apologized.
He began to wonder if everyone really forgot his birthday.
Peter then got up from his seat and said, “I just remembered, I got to go to the store."
"I got to meet Tammy," said Davy.
"I have to get some guitar strings," said Mike.
"Do you guys want me to come with you?" asked Micky.
"That's ok Micky, I'll be fine," said Peter.
"I'm going on a date," said Davy.
"And I won't be gone long," said Mike.
The guys the left, leaving Micky alone in the pad.
Micky slumped back down in the couch annoyed with his best friends. "So called friends," he muttered. He grabbed the remote and clicked the television on.
"Do you have troubles at home?" asked the man on the TV.
Micky nodded.
"Are you all alone?"
Micky nodded once again.
"And…did your best friends forget your birthday?"
Micky leaned forward, nodding vigorously.
"If this is your life, then you need to come to the Happy Humble House, where we have fun and everyone remembers YOU! Just call..."
Micky scribbled down the telephone number on a scrap piece of paper he found in his wallet and proceeded to dial.

Mike cracked open the door to see if Micky was anywhere in sight. Not seeing him, he called for Davy and Peter to come on in. They were holding big bags full of stuff and needed to hide them before Micky caught them in the act.
Mike, Peter and Davy were half-way through the door when Mike spotted Micky dialing on the telephone. Too late, they tried to back out, but Micky spotted them and hung up the phone before he had finished dialing.
"Hey guys!" Micky called over to them, "You sure came back quick!" He gave them a sly smile. "What's in the bags?"
"What bags?" Peter asked.
"The bags you have in your hands, Peter." Micky said.
"Oh these bags!" He exclaimed. "Um, these are...."
"Groceries Mr. Babbit told us to carry to Mrs. Prudy's." Mike said quickly as he pushed Peter and Davy out the door. "We went to our door instead of hers."
"Yeah, we'll see you later, Micky." Davy said.
"Need help with all that?" Micky asked.
"NO!" Mike, Peter and Davy yelled at the same time.
"We're fine, Micky." Mike said more quietly to him, "Just go and do whatever it was you were going to do."
"Yeah, I think I will." Micky said, getting angry. "I'll close the door for you."
"Thanks, Mick." Peter said as he walked out.
Micky didn't answer, but simply slammed the door in Peter's face. Taking a deep breath to calm himself down, Micky went back over to the phone and dialed the number for 'Happy Humble House'. After a few rings, a woman answered.
"Hello? Happy Humble House where YOU are number one!"
"Yes, today is my birthday and my friends have forgotten it." Micky replied.
"Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that, sir. You've called the right place. Let me have your name and age and when you come down we'll make it a special day for you!"
Micky told her his name and age. She took the info down and told him to come by anytime that day to celebrate.
"Happy Birthday, Micky." The lady said, "And we'll see you later.”
"Thank you." Micky replied, "I'll be there soon."
Micky hung up the phone, happy to hear somebody wish him a happy birthday.
"At least I'll have some fun today." Micky said to himself as he grabbed his coat and headed out the door.
Micky was walking down the street, when he realized that he didn't have the address for Happy Humble House. He looked it up in a phone book at a near-by booth.
"Let's see,” Micky said looking through the phone book, “Happy Hank's Used Car Lot, Happy Harry's Used Car Lot, Happy Herman's Used Car Lot, Happy Henry's Used Car Lot, Happy Hurbert's Used Car Lot, oops too far. Here we are, Happy Humble House."
Micky took the address and headed for the place.
Micky walked into the Happy Humble House, and got a very unexpected greeting.
"Surprise!!!" everyone yelled.
"Happy birthday!!" another man said.
There were people everywhere, all with balloons and confetti.
"Happy birthday!" said a man, as he tossed a handful of confetti at Micky.
"Wow!" said Micky "This is great!"
"Welcome to the Happy Humble House", said a woman "Where no one will ever forget your special day!"
"Gee thanks!" Micky said.
Micky was quite happy to see what the folks at Happy Humble House did for him.
"We wish you Mitch, a very happy birthday," said the man who threw the confetti.
"Thank you, but my name is Micky," Micky corrected the man.
"We hope you have a happy birthday Mitch,” said the woman, “By the way that will be 5 dollars."
"It's Micky and 5 dollars for what?"
"One dollar for the greeting, 2 dollars for confetti throwing and 2 more dollars for the balloons," said another man.
"For another 8 dollars, we can throw in a cake, candles and a wish," said another woman.
The smile on Micky's face began to slowly fade away.
"No that's ok," he said, taking some money out of his wallet, and paid one of the men.
Micky then turned and left the building.
"Happy Birthday Mitch!" the people all shouted.
"Thank you, but my name's…" Micky stopped. He was in no mood to correct what they said to him.
Micky almost ran from the Happy Humble Home, he was feeling so upset. He should've known they would charge money for making him feel special! It was just a business, a business to make you feel happy and charge you for it. Micky sat down on a bench, never feeling so embarrassed and alone in his life.
"Some birthday." Micky thought to himself as he wiped a tear away. "My so-called friends forget my birthday and the ones who do charge me for it!"
A stray dog came over and sniffed Micky's hand. Micky smiled and tried to pet the dog, but the dog growled at him and ran away.
"Even dogs don't like me." Micky thought gloomily. Heaving a big sigh, Micky got up and headed back home.
"Maybe the guys finally remembered." Micky said hopefully, "I'll go home and they'll have the pad all decorated and yell 'surprise!' at me!" With that happy thought, Micky quickly walked home.

Micky walked through the front door of the pad, hoping the guys would be there to surprise him. Mike, Peter and Davy were there, but to his disappointment, the pad was undecorated.
"Hi Mick." Mike said, sitting on the couch reading the newspaper. Peter and Davy were playing checkers; they didn't even bother to say hi.
"Hi guys." Micky said sadly. "Anything new?"
"Don't worry, Micky." Davy said, concentrating on his next move, "We didn't forget."
"You didn't?" Micky said happily.
"We didn't forget it's your turn to cook," Peter replied, "and it's almost time for supper."
Micky looked down at the floor. It 'was' his turn to cook supper, but it seems his friends really had forgotten his birthday after all. Blinking back tears, Micky went into the kitchen and made spaghetti; at least they would eat something he liked today.
During supper, Micky tried one last time.
"Does March eighth mean anything to you guys?" He asked.
"Well, it's one week before the Ides of March." Davy replied, "The day Julius Caesar got it."
It took all of Micky's control not to scream 'It's my birthday!' at his friends. Micky simply picked up his half-eaten meal, threw it in the garbage, walked up into his bedroom and slammed the door.
Peter whispered to the other two.
"Don't you think we're carrying this too far?" He asked.
"I don't want Micky to feel bad, but we want this to be a big surprise." Mike replied quietly.
"Well, let's get this over soon, before he never talks to us again." Davy replied.
The other two agreed and quickly finished their meal and cleaned the kitchen. Later, Mike called up to Micky.
"Wanna go to a movie, Micky?" He asked.
Micky came out to the balcony.
"No thanks." He said sourly, "I just wanna be alone right now."
"We would like you to come with us." Peter replied.
"I said 'no thanks', Peter." Micky said, getting angry. "Do you understand what that means?"
"Alright, we'll leave you alone." Davy said, "See you later."
But Micky had already gone back into his bedroom.
Getting into the car, Davy looked at Mike.
"Great, now when we want him to come with us, he won't."
"Don't worry." Mike replied, "When we get to where we're going, I'll call Micky and tell him to come over. We're not going that far."
With that, Mike started the Monkeemobile and drove away.

Upstairs in his bedroom, Micky sat on his bed with his head in his hands.
"Go to the movies, yeah right." Micky groused, "Like I'd go anywhere with those false friends." He lay down on his bed. "There's gotta be somebody who cares about me, somebody who remembered my birthday." Suddenly he sat up in bed and snapped his fingers.
"I know!" He exclaimed, "Why didn't I think of it before? Then he got another idea.
"I'll go over to her house for a few days." He said to himself as he leaped off the bed and began to go through his cupboards. "Why should I stay here and be humiliated?" He asked himself as he pulled a duffel bag from under his bed and began to fill it with some clothing. "Let the guys do without me for a few days."
Soon Micky was all packed. He came down the hurricane stairs and debated whether or not to leave a note. Micky decided against it, "Let them worry about me." He thought with a smirk on his face.
Shouldering his duffel bag, Micky left the pad.

Mike, Peter and Davy quickly went over to where they had stashed the stuff for Micky's party. Once there, Mike called the pad to get Micky to come over. However, nobody answered at the pad. After the third try, Mike walked over to Peter and Davy who were helping put up the decorations. A few other people were hanging around, talking.
"I dunno." He said, "I've called three times now, and he's not answering."
"He's probably so angry with us, he just won't answer, that's all." Davy replied.
"I sure hope so." Mike answered. "I wonder if he hadn't decided to go out somewhere."
"That's possible." Peter said as he managed to get himself wrapped up in streamers, "Could you guys get me out of this?"
Laughing to themselves, Mike and Davy unwrapped Peter.

Micky walked over to the house he wanted to go to and knocked on the door. After what seemed like a long time, a dark-haired, middle-aged woman answered the door.
"Hi Mom." Micky said with a sad smile.
"Micky!" His mom exclaimed, "Come inside, dear."
"Thanks, Mom." Micky said.
"What brings you here?" Micky's mom asked as she closed the door.
Micky dropped his duffel bag on the floor of the entrance hall.
"Mike, Peter, Davy and all my other friends have forgotten my birthday!" Micky exclaimed, tears coming down his cheeks. "I went to this place where they celebrate birthdays and they charged me money!"
"Oh, you poor dear." Micky's mom said sadly, and brought her son into a warm embrace. Micky thankfully returned the hug and cried. When Micky's sobs had subsided somewhat, she pulled away a little.
"Are you sure, they aren't just pretending?" She asked.
Micky shook his head. "No, I dropped several hints, but they never even came close to guessing." He dried his eyes. "Can I stay here a few days?" He asked. "I don't want to be around them right now. Maybe if I'm gone, they'll realize what happened."
"Of course dear!" His mom said, "Why don't you come into the parlor and I’ll get you something to drink?"
"Sure Mom, thanks!" Micky said.
Micky and his mom walked into the darkened parlor...
Suddenly the lights went on!
"SURPRISE! HAPPY BIRTHDAY MICKY!" Everyone yelled.
Micky stood there in complete shock. The room was decorated with balloons and streamers, and there was a pile of presents on one table. Another table held a big birthday cake.
"You remembered!" Micky exclaimed to his band mates.
"Of course we did!" Davy replied, "You didn't think we'd forget your special day did you?"
"No, of course not." Micky lied, laughing.
All his friends came over and wished Micky a happy birthday, then they all gathered around, sang ‘Happy Birthday’ to Micky, and cheered when he blew out the candles.
It was chocolate cake, Micky's favorite. He then had a great time opening his presents. He got clothes, new drumsticks and other neat things. Thankfully, the others didn’t ask Micky about the duffel bag.
All in all, this was the best birthday Micky ever had!


The End