Of all sixty-five Moonlighting episodes, none is better remembered, more often asked about (you should read my email!), or more popular than this one. And there's a very good reason why this is true: this episode is, without question or contest, the most brilliant piece of comedy ever written for Moonlighting. It is consistently witty throughout – every line, every scene, every plot development, every visual image is a work of comic genius.
We begin with a scene of a mother and son. The son wants to watch television, but the mom reminds him that he has homework to do. "But it's Moonlighting!" he protests. "Sounds like trash to me," the mother responds. The son dejectedly returns to his room and opens a book of Shakespeare plays and begins reading The Taming of the Shrew.
In this version of Shakespeare's play, Maddie Hayes is Katharina, David Addison is Petruchio, Bert Viola is Lucentio, and Agnes DiPesto is Bianca. As in Shakespeare's play, we learn that all the men in the town of Padua want to marry "the fair Bianca", but they can't because her father, Baptista, has declared that Bianca can not be married until her older sister, Katharina, is wed. And, says Baptista, "he who weds Katharina wins a dowery you could cry for." But even so, none of the men of Padua are anxious to take that offer because, as we soon learn, Katharina is a shrew.
As in Shakespeare's play, Petruchio enters the scene and learns about the dowery and about Katharina, and is determined to woo her for his wife. She strenuously objects, but they are married against her will. Petruchio takes her back to his home and insists that now that she is his wife, that she is also his "property", that he is her "lord", and that she is bound to agree with whatever he says. She laughs at this and refuses to take part in it, and it's at this point that we begin to diverge from Shakespeare by putting a 1980's spin on his original story.
"Am I not the man and you the woman?" he asks. "Be this not the time that men are men and women are property? I shall be the master of what is mine own, and thou art my goods, my property, my stuff!"
She will have nothing to do with this, and she tells him so directly: "Stuff your stuff!" And he responds, "Well, we'll see about that, and starting this day!"
"Then already thou seest wrong," she counters, opening the windowshades and revealing the night sky, "for it is plain to any fool that it be night and not day!"
"Day it is if thy husband says it be so. I am thy liege and thy lord, that bringeth home the bacon and provideth thee with a roof over thy thick skull. And for that, by the gods, if I say the moon be the sun then to you, good wife, it shall be so."
"Good wife I am in name only, good husband," she insists, dripping that last with deliberate sarcasm, "and thus it is the moon and 'tis the moon no matter what thee says!"
The argument escalates from there, they slam their respective bedroom doors angrily at one another, and this issue remains unresolved for the time being. But with time, they soften toward one another. Petruchio showers her with kindness, and they move toward respecting and loving one another. In a tender moment she asks him, "Why me? What moved thee to woo me?" And he responds, "Thy life, thy spirit.... More to the point, I saw me in thee." "Husband," she says, "for all thy boorishness and bluster, thou art a good man." And he responds, "And for all thy shrillness and shrewishness, thou art quite a remarkable woman." This is a gently tender scene, in which we learn that they do love each other, and more interestingly, not just Kate but Petruchio as well have both been "tamed" by one another.
Despite this, however, there is still one "taming" yet to occur. Kate and Petruchio arrive as guests at Bianca's and Lucentio's wedding, and the people of Padua are amazed that the shrew does appear to have been tamed. But a rumor begins to circulate among the crowd, that "Kate merely pretendeth to be tamed – that she be talking of equality – of thy marriage being fifty-fifty!" Petruchio is embarrassed at this. After all, he has a reputation to protect. Baptista comes to him and demands that it is his right to know, "Who hath in fact been tamed – Kate … or thee?"
"If thou needest proof of the taming of Kate then proof it shall be!" he announces. "Fetch me my wife!" And with that, the townspeople are intensely interested.
Petruchio swaggers. Kate arrives. "You calleth, Husband?" she asks. "Yes," he replies arrogantly, "and with a purpose. There is a duty thou must perform.". "You have but to ask, dear husband," she responds, "and I'll do my best to please thee."
"That thou will," he proclaims, swaggering some more. "For thy husband is thy lord, thy life, thy keeper. And as thou art bound to serve and obey, thou art bound to agree whatever he saith be true above all else." Pointing to the sun in the sky, he announces, "Kate, I say 'tis the moon that shines so bright. And as my wife, wouldst thou not agree, 'tis indeed?"
The tension in the crowd mounts as Kate joins him to take a look. "Husband, I believest thou art mistaken. And if thou takest another look, I'm quite sure thy error will be clear. 'Tis the sun, and not the moon, which shines so bright." The crowd holds its collective breath.
"The sun you say?" he says to the crowd, as she gives him a look that says, "I dare you to contradict me in front of these people." And Petruchio continues, "If that be your final answer, I have but one choice – to look again." He does so, and announces, "Why as I live and breathe, 'twas indeed a mistake – my wife hath told it – it is the sun, and not the moon at all." The townspeople gasp, and Petruchio goes on to announce that he was wrong, and that he has had a "revelation – to myself too long in coming – and it concerns the beauty of holding thy mate at thy side." He goes on to say to the whole town that he had struck a deal with Baptista, that "I might receive thy dowery if, and only if, I tamed thee. I now renounce this deal – and wish for no other reward other than thy affection, and thy company for as long as thee shall live."
And with that, she approaches him, she sweeps him off his feet, and she kisses him passionately.
Our homework schoolboy shuts his book, runs downstairs to find that his mom has been watching Moonlighting. Breathlessly, he asks if it's still on. "Nope," she says, "it just ended." He's disappointed, and she says, with a delightful dose of ironic self-deprecation, "That's okay. It wasn't very good tonight anyway."
Guest Starring:
Co-Starring:
For most Moonlighting episodes, if I have commentary, I bury it in the plot synopsis, such as when I name The Dream Sequence Always Rings Twice and Every Daughter's Father is a Virgin as my personal favorite episodes, or when I say that The Bride of Tupperman is my favorite example of Dave and Maddie banter.
But in this case, I'm opening up a whole section of commentary, because there's so much about this episode that needs to be said. This episode is, as I said, a classic work of comic genius. Somebody ought to write a term paper or a dissertation or something about the comedy in this episode. (If anybody has written one, or does write one, I'd like to read it.) So many comedic elements come together in this episode, and they are so brilliantly put together and executed, that this episode just cries out for someone to analyze and appreciate them.
Here are some examples of the kinds of things I mean.
This episode knows that it's a television show. Moonlighting was well-known for doing this – as already mentioned, for example, this episode begins and ends with a mother and son who are watching the show – but in this episode, Moonlighting also adapts that feature to Shakespeare:
Lucentio tries to explain himself to passersby who are not interested, and he complains to himself, "It's my fault I got stuck with all the exposition?"
Petruchio arrives in town and begins his famous line, but it comes out "To be, or not to be – that is the question!" Lucentio reminds him that he's quoting the wrong play, so he tries again. "Now is the winter of our discontent, made glorious—" … and Lucentio interrupts him once again. He tries a third time, with "Friends, Romans, countrymen, lend me your ears!" – and this time, the whole town cries out in unison, "WRONG PLAY!!!" He pulls out a script, reads from it: "Verona, for a while I take my leave?" The townspeople nod approvingly, and he starts his speech.
As Petruchio is explaining himself to the town, he says, "And now, on to matters of greater import, and the reason for my visit to this fair city – to wit, a major plot point cometh: I come to wive it wealthily in Padua."
When Petruchio and Lucentio meet, Lucentio tells him about Kate and asks if he is interested. Petruchio responds, "Doth bears beareth? Doth bees be-eth?" (David Addison was well known, especially early on, for variations on this linguistic theme. He would say things like "Do bears bear? Do bees be?" or in a gambling situation, "Do dice die? Does felt feel?" This line from Petruchio is thus a Shakespeare-ization of a Moonlighting tradition.)
Petruchio and Lucentio meet early on, and then part ways. When they do, Petruchio says, "Farewell my friend, until we meet again – somewhere in the fourth act." We don't see Lucentio again until his wedding with Bianca – in the fourth act of the episode.
Petruchio's home is designed with the same layout as the Blue Moon offices, including the word "Petruchio" across the window where the words "Blue Moon" usually appear. Petruchio's bedroom is David Addison's office, and Kate's bedroom is Maddie Hayes's office, so that when Petruchio and Kate slam their doors at one another (which Maddie and David did to each other frequently), Petruchio pokes his head back out of his door and says to the camera, "Methinks there was something familiar about that."
At the end of the episode, the last thing we hear from Kate and Petruchio is what the narrator calls their single complaint: "We hate iambic pentameter!"
This episode juxtaposes 20th century symbols into the Shakespearean milieu. In case I haven't made it clear already, this episode is set in 1593 in Padua, and it is presented using the sets and costumes and related identifiers of Shakespearean times. However, it superimposes a number of modern identifiers onto that scene for comic effect, as follows:
Petruchio arrives in town on a horse which has a prominent "BMW" automobile logo on the side. Both he and the horse are wearing sunglasses.
When Lucentio introduces Petruchio to Baptista, Petruchio presents his list of requirements that Baptista must meet before Petruchio will wed Katharina. Among these are "Your own Winnebago, a chance to direct, a piece of the syndication rights...."
Initially, Kate doesn't allow Petruchio into her living quarters. She has a sign posted with a red-circle-and-diagonal-line symbol which reads "No suitors". But outside her door is an axe behind safety glass, with a warning label which reads, "In case of shrew, break glass." Petruchio breaks through her door with the axe, and in a veiled reference to The Shining thrusts his face through the hole in the door and calls out, "Here's Petruchio!"
There's a tickertape parade at Kate's wedding. A newspaper headline reads, "Kate to Marry Today – Men of Padua Rejoice"
Petruchio sings Good Lovin' at his wedding
Petruchio makes a veiled allusion to The Honeymooners when he says to Kate as part of their argument, "Bang zoom! I hope they like these jokes on the moon Kate, 'cause that's where you're going!"
After their wedding, Petruchio tries to win Kate with kindness. As he does so, he presents her with flowers and a Whitman's Sampler box of chocolates. She responds by hitting him with them, so he returns with a suit of armor. She responds by putting a stick of dynamite into his armor and in homage to those those old Warner Brothers cartoons, he and the stick of dynamite explode offstage. While this is going on, the music to Raymond Scott's "Powerhouse" is playing, which is a tune which is most frequently identified as music from the same Warner Brothers cartoons.
Petruchio is reading the newspaper at the dinner table, and he reads a news item to Kate: "Forty teenagers arrested at the Bach concert last night. 'Tis said, if thou playest the second concerto backwards, thou hearest the voice of Satan."
When a messenger arrives to invite Petruchio and Kate to Lucentio's and Bianca's wedding, he's wearing a Western Union uniform.
The band plays Close to You at Bianca's wedding, and Petruchio comments, "I loveth a band that playeth the oldies" – implying that The Carpenters were old even way back then!
This episode uses puns and similar wordplay just for the fun of it. Examples include:
Lucentio: Stay! Didst I hear, "I come to wive it wealthily in Padua"
Petruchio: Pray sir, yea sir, I dare say I did say.
Lucentio: Yea sir, you do say you did say?
Petruchio: Yea, I say, but why do you pray? Do not gainsay what I say that we may make headway. I foray this way that I may be home ere midday.
Lucentio: Hooray for this day and the words that you say and forgive my display, but I have something to say.
Petruchio: Then without further delay, I say, fire away!
(And they high-five each other.)Kate: Who are you? Certainly not the piano tuner you claimeth to be.
Petruchio: You see through me Kate. No tuner I. But I wish it were within my talents to play piano for you.
Kate: 'Tis a sad thing indeed. You're the only man I know who suffereth from pianist envy.Kate: Unhand me!
Petruchio [shaking her hand at the wrist]: I'll try, but I don't think they'll come off!Petruchio: 'Tis my will to marry you my lady, and where there's a will....
Kate: … there's a won't!Kate: Good husband, are we married merrily?
Petruchio: Yea, verily, we are married merrily … though at first warily, and unfortunately quite sterily.Baptista: It is plain the whole town knoweth of the deal 'twixt me and Petruchio. And if the whole town knoweth, then 'tis possible that Kate knoweth. And if Kate knoweth and knoweth that the whole town knoweth and knoweth that we knoweth that she knoweth – knowest what that means?
Lucentio: No-eth
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