My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low-grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a 15 year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink, he would make outrageous claims, like he invented the question mark. Sometimes, he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy - the sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical: summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring, we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent, I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds. Pretty standard, really...

... er, wait, that's not my bio, I think that's Dr. Evil from the Austin Powers movies... sorry, I do get confused sometimes...

Near as I can tell, I'm just your basic boring middle-aged guy with way too much time on his hands. I'm an electrical hardware engineer by trade, although most of my spare time is spent screwing around on the computer. My passion for computer graphics is matched only by a rather astonishing lack of ability. I do have fun hacking away, though. And I've been a computer game junky since Pong. Flight-sims, CRPG's, strategy games; I've died horribly and regularly in all of 'em. My latest addiction is an on-line RPG called Everquest. If you're ever on-line and you see an annoying half-elf ranger named Griven dying an incredibly stupid and needless death, over and over again, feel free to mock him openly. Everyone else does.

As a boy, I actually was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds, however. Well, if not, I probably should have been.