Movie Reviews

Updated February 23, 2004

Key to the Ratings

-      A total waste of money. Lacks any redeeming quality. Avoid it even on cable. Hunt down those responsible.

-     Entertainingly moronic. Amusing in its lack of tastefulness. Appeals to strange sense of humor in gifted people.

(-) -     Blah! Boring fodder.  Not entertaining on any level.  Like watching paint dry..

- A solid movie. Worth the price of a video rental. Should hold broad appeal to any movie lover.

- Top notch. Destined to be a classic, and worth seeing in theatres. Should appeal to anyone with sight.

New Movies Rated

(-) Down With Love

Down with this movie!  Renee Zellweger plays an up and coming feminist book author that stands romance on its head.  Ewan McGregor plays the playboy magazine writer that's out to woo her and bring her ideals crashing to the ground.  The script is simply terrible - attempts at 60's style humor are wooden and in some cases outright vile.  Supporting cast is excellent, as is Zellweger, but they can't save this from being termed a disaster, masquerading as a romantic comedy.  What little the script writers didn't kill, Ewan McGregor made sure to snuff out with his poor performance.  I'll be willing to bet that more than a few people lost their jobs after this movie. Poor use of humor, sexuality, missing leading man. PG-13

Thirteen

Follows the delicate and fragile world of a young girl hitting puberty, and her struggles to keep herself afloat in a world full of avarice and vice.  The young girls who play the lead and supporting role are fine actresses, and put on an awe inspiring performance to bring the dangers to light.  Holly Hunter gives a great performance as the struggling mom who battles poverty and family dysfunction.  Chilling in many ways, and probably not too far off the mark in some respects. Sexuality, drugs, language. R

American Splendor

Odd and quirky telling of Harvey Pekar, an odd fellow who hooked up with Bob Crumb to makes some strange but popular adult comic books in the 70's & 80's.  Paul Giamatti does his usual great performance, but the movie starts out very slow, even if you know who Bob Crumb is.  The 2nd half gets a little better, and becomes more engrossing.  Not nearly as entertaining as Howard Stern said it was.  Language, Adult Themes. R

(-) 2 Fast 2 Furious

Poorly done follow-up to the popular The Fast and The Furious.  It was obvious that the creative forces behind the first movie weren't here to make sure the second movie lived up to the mark.  Done-to-death plot of evil Colombian drug cartel makes for a real yawner.  Throw in the fact that the rest of the movie acts like an over-done commercial for Mitsubishi, and you've got a loser on your hands.  The market is still ripe for a real street racing action film - this movie didn't come close to scratching the itch.  Language, violence, bad acting. R

Archive of Movies Rated

28 Days

Sandra Bullock was excellent in this movie - what a cutie.  Heartwarming and funny, the story of a woman's attempt to leave bad habits behind without leaving her closest friends behind as well.  Weak in some spots, but it holds up pretty well over the whole movie. Drug use, language, sensuality. PG-13

(?) All The Pretty Horses

I'm confused as to how to rate this movie.  Excellent cast of actors is wasted on a script that wandered back and forth between interesting and confusing.   The main focus of this story, the relationship between a young cowboy on the run (Matt Damon) and a young Mexican rancher's daughter (Penelope Cruz), is given short shrift.  However, the whole movie revolves around this relationship, and since the viewer is given enough time to care about the relationship, the events that threaten it just seem like so much chaff.  If someone had reviewed this script better, this could have been a good film.  Only recommended for heavy Matt Damon fans.  Violence, mild sexual content.  PG-13

American Beauty

Ode to the dysfunctional 90's American family.  I've always had a problem with comedy that hides violence, but this didn't disturb me as much as Fargo did.  Lunch table discussions of this movie pin it as mostly a guy film that will appeal to some female cynics as well.  Kevin Spacey adds another notch to his list of solid performances.  Intergenerational sexual situations, infidelity, teen angst, mid-life crises, prejudices.  R

American History X

Top notch performances by Edward Norton (Rounders) and Edward Furlong (Terminator II) as brothers help bring this very disturbing story of racial conflict in Southern California to life.  A white supremacist goes full circle.  This movie caused my blood pressure to rise in several instances and I found myself in about as much conflict as some of the characters in the story.  A gripping story, nonetheless.  Heavy profanity, sexual content, and violence  R

American Movie

Documentary following a small town Wisconsin man's efforts to establish himself as a director and film maker.  Very funny, poignant, and sometimes disturbing look at a small slice of American citizenry.  Hard to tell whether this guy is a genius, a dope, or a healthy combination of both.  I loved it and found it very entertaining.  Follow up information to the documentary can be found at www.americanmovie.com.  Strong language, drug references. R

Angela's Ashes

A fairly well done movie about a boy's journey out of desperate poverty of early 20th century Ireland.  Unfortunately this movie does too good a job of recreating the numbing desperation and hopelessness that one must have felt in existing in those conditions.  After 30 minutes I wanted to put my head in a gas oven.  A few heart warming scenes, but far too infrequent to balance out the emotional lows of the characters involved.  Bad weather, poverty, Catholicism.  R

The Animal

As much as I thought I was going to hate this, it still couldn't keep me from enjoying it.  Rob Schneider plays a loveable loser who ends up taking on some very odd animal behaviors through an operation to overcome a terrible accident.  The chick Colleen,  from the first 'Survivor', was not as bad as I thought she would be, either.  She's way cute, besides. Look for a very funny cameo by Norm MacDonald. Goofy sexuality, goofy profanity. PG-13

Artemisia

A French film that follows the usual French film formula: no matter what the storyline is, show frontal nudity within the first minute of the film.  Oddly enough, that seems to work almost every time.  The story of a young girl (Artemisia) who bucks tradition in 15th century Italy by becoming a painter.  She is thrown out of the nunery by the Sister who discovers the self nude portraits she has done.   Artemisia then embarks on a quest to draw that which is forbidden by the Papacy: the nude male body.  In a scene that is almost uncanny with the events of Clinton's presidency today, it is beyond words to watch poor Artemisia try to defend herself in court when the defense introduces as evidence dozens of her drawings of the, uhh, male appendage thingy.  If only Artemisia wore a black beret, then the similarities would be too much to bare, uhh, bear.  R

Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me

While the plot of this movie is weak, the overall effect of the story is good.  Almost as if they needed a plot to piece together a long string of very funny short sketches.  The sketches are so good, and so numerous, that it works.  Naughty character names, silly sexual innuendo, chest hair. R

Being John Malkovich

Don't know where to begin in describing this film, but it is entertainingly bizarre.  John Cusack puts in a good performance, and John Malkovich is excellent as well.  Struggling puppeteer decides to find a steady job, but it leads to many unanticipated places. The Wife gave it an enthusiastic thumbs up. Some sexual content. R

Black Hawk Down

If more movie goers would hold themselves to higher standards, we wouldn't be subjected to weak renditions of compelling stories such as this.   The story is quite gripping, but I don't believe the film did a lot to show that.   One could argue that reality was the higher goal, but I know that they took liberties with certain characters just to enhance the tale.  Unfortunately, it was enough to do it justice.  Still, it will hold any war buff's interest.  Violence, language. R

Breaking the Waves

I'm not sure how to describe this movie, but it was certainly entertaining.  A young Irish woman, Bess, gets married and wrestles with her Catholic upbringing.  Unique in its perspective, with a humorous undertone throughout the movie. Very long at nearly 2 hours 40 minutes.  Sexuality, religion, nudity  R

(-) Bridget Jones' Diary

I'm still trying to figure out why everyone else seemed to like this movie.  Renee Zellwiger did a fine job of playing her character, but the character never seemed to take on the necessary dimensions to draw you into the story.   Hugh Grant pulled his stereotypical English charmer character out and it was enjoyable, but the rest of the cast wasn't very memorable.  Not sure if it was storyline or performances that sunk this for me, but whatever it was, it did sink it.   Strong language and sexuality. R

Celebrity

Like Living Out Loud, this film is mildly entertaining but doesn't seem to go anywhere and holds virtually no meaning.  An ego trip for it's director, Woody Allen, it seems to be a thinly (very thinly) veiled attempt to explain to the movie-going public the reasons behind his philandering with his own step-daughter.   Not worth breaking your boycott of Woody Allen films if you are so inclined.   Sexual situations, language R

Charlie's Angels

"Silly" is the best word I can come up w/ to describe this effort.  The Angels are tasked with helping a client from a kidnapping, and end up thwarting a hidden threat on their own empire.  Attempting to recreate the mediocrity of the original TV show, but adding some current razzle-dazzle, fails to make up for the weakness of the original premise.  Drew Barrymore  sinks under the lack of character, and Cameron Diaz just  doesn't have anything to add.  The lone high point for me was Lucy Liu - delicious!  Bill Murray isn't given nearly enough leg room to show his comedic talents.  However, this film doesn't torture the viewer, either.  The Wife enjoyed this much more than I did.  But if there's something else on the shelf you've been waiting to view, reach for it over this.  Sexual situations, violence, dopiness.  PG-13

Chocolat

Excellent story of a woman who wanders into a dreary French town and shakes up the establishment via her cocoa confections.  Enhanced by wonderful acting (Juliette Binoche, Judy Dench, Johnny Depp), both The Wife and I enjoyed this one immensely.  New morality, lots of chocolate, mild adult situations. PG-13

The Cider House Rules

Set in WWII-era Maine, follows the lives of several people connected to an orphanage.  Michael Caine gives a good performance, and Toby Maguire (Pleasantville) has a solid leading role.  Formulaic in its touching/humorous/against-all-odds plotline, it entertains nonetheless.  Brief nudity, adult subject matter. PG-13

Cookie's Fortune

A touching and funny story of small-town intrigue in the south (Louisiana, I believe).  A very good cast consisting of Chris O'Donnell, Glenn Close, Liv Tyler, Patricia Neal, and more.  Solid acting and a good plot, with Glenn Close in a great performance as the villain.  PG-13

Crash

One of the worst films I've ever witnessed, this film entertains by amazing the viewer that relatively known actors agreed to appear in this mess.  If I hadn't read a review of it before, I'm not sure I could have told you what the main theme was about.  James Spader and Holly Hunter trash what credibility they had by playing people who, I am not making this up, become sexually excited by either watching or participating in, automobile accidents.  And they are only the tip of the iceberg for this phenomena!! The unintentional humor of this crap was greatly enhanced by watching my wife's expressions of disgust at various points throughout the show.  Too extreme to be described, I recommend this to every film fan just to ensure that they realize how low art can sink.  For ultimate entertainment value, make sure you watch this movie with an upstanding citizen, so that you can be entertained by their reactions.  Almost unseated Wild Orchid as the all-time worst film.   Contains dismemberment, graphic sexual content with prosthesis, decapitation, blatant disregard for insurance deductibles, insurance fraud  R

Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon

Not as artistically endowed as I had imagined, this movie was interesting none the less.  Martial Arts warriors attempt to leave their fighting past behind and lead calmer lives, but the past keeps catching up with them.  The special effects are goofy, but are consistently goofy, so they become acceptable as the film plays out.   An interesting story holds this together.  Tough to judge the quality of the acting, since you'll be reading the dialog most of the time instead of looking for facial details.  Mild violence, mild sexuality.  PG-13

Dirty Work

Norm MacDonald, formerly of "Saturday Night Live", stars as a loveable screwup who tries to raise cash for his new-found relative's transplant, while trying to get the girl.  Chris Farley, formerly of "Saturday Night Live", and this world, does a great cameo bit as a slightly off-center Viet Nam vet.  Lots of sophomoric scatalogical references, with a smattering of dead prostitute jokes, making this a funny, funny movie.  Even The Wife agreed that it was fun. The main characters are solid (Jack Warden as an elderly parent is a roar), but the supporting cast needs to attend drama school.  Despite the poor acting, it is still good. R

Dogma

Modern day tale of angels' struggle to deal with their place in the cosmos.  A talented all-star cast gives an added spike of interest to a unique story line.  Unnecessarily foul language is about the only drawback that I found in the movie.  Funny starring roles by Silent Bob and the other slacker character from Clerks and Chasing Amy.  If you haven't seen those films, the cameos' full impact will be lost on you.  See those movies first before this one. Strong language, sexuality, violence, religion. R

Dolores Claiborne

Kathy Bates heads up a cast full of stellar performances.  Kathy plays the part of an abused wife and mother who helps her daughter, played by Jennifer Jason Leigh, come to terms with their troubled and secret past.  An excellent story line that would be ruined with any further description here.  Suspenseful and full of deliciously devious twists.  R

Duets

Paul Giamatti (Private Parts), Huey Lewis, and Gwyneth Paltrow star in this odd tale of the intersecting lives of karaoke singers.  The Wife and I split on this film, I liking it a lot and she thinking it was marginal.  Since I'm the online reviewer, I'm giving it a thumbs up.  Excellent performances from Paul Giamatti and Andre Braugher.  Huey Lewis is a bit wooden, but since he's a singer and not an actor, I'll forgive him.  Cameo by Angie Dickinson.  Language, mild violence, white male rage.  R

Elizabeth

Follows the ascension of Elizabeth I to the throne of England.  As a young woman she is forced to deal with foreign policy, internal power struggles, religious heresy, and finding a husband.  The plot seems to hunt for its rhythm throughout the film, but without becoming boring or distracting.  Sexuality, violence, religion, public executions.  R

Enemy At the Gates

War movies hold a special spot with me, and this movie found a place there without much of a problem.  Very interesting story, with very good combat scenes and relatively believable situations.  The only thing that struck me odd, and almost ruined the entire movie for me, was that several of the actors who were playing Russian soldiers (Joseph Fiennes & Jude Law) didn't even attempt to hide their British accents.  This just seemed really weird, considering the very British Bob Hoskins came on with a heavily Russian accented portrayal of Nikita Kruschev.  After 10 minutes I stopped obsessing on it and got back into the story. War violence and some sexuality. R

Erin Brockovich

Set in early 80's California, the movie tells the story of a down-on-her-luck lady played by Julia Roberts as she tries to find her way in the world, and ends up making a difference in an unexpected way.  Most of the acting is good in this, but I found myself waiting for the meat of the story to appear most of the way through until the end.  I wasn't really happy that the story only went as deep as it did, and by the end it seemed to be a cheap imitation of a good movie.  I must admit I followed it and found it interesting right through until the end.  Unnecessarily foul language. R

Ever After

Drew Barrymore and Anjelica Huston star in this refreshing 16th century period piece based on the story of Cinderella.  Both Drew and Anjelica play their parts perfectly as the put upon orphan and the increasingly evil stepmother.  I never would have picked this out myself, but in sharing with The Wife, agreed to watch it and came away enjoying it more perhaps than she did.  This solidified my standing as a Drew Barrymore fan.  Special guest appearance by Leonardo DaVinci. PG-13

Everest

IMAX footage taken during the ill-fated climb of Mt. Everest during May of 1996, which eventually costing the lives of 9 climbers from 4 expeditions.  At 44 minutes in length, it's 40 minutes too long.  This film does nothing to shed any light on this riveting event, and does even less for any other aspect of the climb.  While some of the footage may have been impressive in an IMAX equipped theater, none of that impact has transfered to video.  Inexplicably, the incredibly gripping events of that adventure are lost in a muddle of footage, some of which was shot as recreations at locations in other countries!  Take your money and plunk it down for a copy of Into Thin Air, a first-person account by Jon Krakauer of the events that led up to the single most tragic day in Mt. Everest history.  A great book that will change the way you think about adventure, which sadly, this film fails to do in any way. NR

Eye of the Beholder

Ashley Judd and Ewan McGregor put in, well, performances of some sort.   I'm assuming it was acting, but it was so tough to tell when there's NO UNDERSTANDABLE STORY!!  In fact, go ahead and rent this - if you can explain it to me in a reasonable fashion I'll pay for your rental*. Missing plot and reason for being. R

* To be eligible for rental reimbursement, you must not only be able to comprehend plot but also explain relationship of most central characters to each other.   Reimbursement not to exceed $3.99.  But I'm not worried, no one will be able to claim this one!

Freddy Got Fingered

Tom Green's disastrous directing debut!  This movie tickled my fancy in its tastelessness.  I just kept trying to imagine a theater full of people who had laid down some serious money to watch a film, but instead were presented with this.  There were also some semi-funny moments in it that were entertaining.  "Daddy want some sausages".  Language, Tastelessness, Poor storyline. R

Galaxy Quest

Funny and quirky look at over-the-hill Sci-fi actors who become wrapped up in an encounter of the Third kind.  William Shatner must have been paid off to prevent him from seeking royalties after the fact.  Goofy, but in a fun and entertaining way.  Relatively family-friendly.  Unexplained cleavage shots, mild extraterrestrial violence.  PG-13

(?) Ghost World

Once again, I'm stuck with a movie that I'm not sure how I feel about it.  Steve Buscemi plays his usual stereotypical off-beat semi-loser character, and it seems solid without much effort, but the rest of the characters just couldn't lift up the awful direction.  The Wife and I both agreed that it was successful in depressing us, and not much else.  Interesting soundtrack. Language, mild sexual situations. R

The Fast and The Furious (in theaters)

I've read so much about this film while doing Honda vehicle research online that I just couldn't wait.   Cop goes under  cover to find out who has been behind a rash of truck hijackings.  Typical of your 'trend exploitation' themed flicks, this one has its weak spots.  However, the cars are fun to watch, and the action is typical of your action/adventure films of the day.  The thing that bugged me the most about the film was how certain items of the import performance scene were thrown in as an afterthought rather than being blended better into the story.   You get the sense that the filmmakers were trying to walk a fine line of making the car guys and the general film going public happy at the same time.   As a car guy, I'd rather they erred more on our side  than the average joe side.  Despite its flaws, I still found it fun.  It's just that I keep thinking it could have been so much better if the street racing scene were featured more, the cars were featured more, etc.  Language, violence, mild sexual situations, crime, nitrous.  PG-13

Gladiator

Compelling tale of political intrigue during the transfer of power of Caesar Marcus Aurilius.  Russell Crowe plays the Roman general Maximus who gets caught up in the power struggle that occurs.  Many violent scenes involved during battles, but the director took a unique but not very effective approach to lessen the graphic nature of it all.  He simply chose to show snippets of the stabbing, piercing, burning, etc, in such quick fashion as to almost be subliminal in nature.   The problem is, you aren't sure what you saw.  I found this to be confusing and takes away from an otherwise interesting movie. Oddly enough this film might just be a hint of what could have happened if the Florida vote count dragged on much longer.  Subliminal sword wounds, wanton violence, injustice.  R

Gods and Monsters

Follows the trials of an aging director who tries to come to grips with his impending mortality.  Brendan Fraser (George of the Jungle, The Mummy) and Vanessa Redgrave (or maybe it was Lynn) play supporting parts to the director James Whale, whose claim to fame is his direction of Frankenstein.  I'm not what the underlying theme of the plot is, but it did hold my attention for the duration.   Odd ending seemed contrived.  Not sure how factual this is.  Various sexuality, language, humor.  R

The Governess

I'm not sure how to rate this one.  Although it held my interest, there seemed to be nothing solid behind the story.  Minnie Driver (Good Will Hunting) plays a young Jewess in early 19th century London who is forced out into the world to make a living under false pretenses.  Much of the sub plots involved here have been done before, and probably better, in other movies.  Still, it got two thumbs up from Siskel & Ebert, and I did find it likable.  Frontal male nudity, behindal female nudity, dead rodents, 19th century dreariness.  R

(-) Haiku Tunnel

The premise seemed funny, but this film just can't deliver on its promise.  The lead character takes us thru his bumblings as a temp office worker, and the big premise is his inability to function as a perm.  Harry Shearer does a humorous bit part as the office orientation leader, walking the lead character thru a paper jam.  Glints of humor, but it just can't bust out of mediocrity.  Language, sexual situations. R

The Horse Whisperer

I'm no fan of horses; in fact, I'm slightly phobic of them, but this is a great film nonetheless.  A solid plot with no slow moments will keep you from realizing that this film is almost 3 hours long. Take the phone off the hook. Is it me, or is Dianne Wiest blowing up faster than Ann Wilson from Heart?  PG-13

An Ideal Husband

Rupert Everett, Minnie Driver, and Julianne Moore star in a story of turn of the century London.  Romance and politics, corruption and greed attempt to place their mark on several of the characters.  Rupert Everett plays a wealthy but lazy bachelor who is being hounded by his father to marry.  Several interesting subplots are developed along the way.  Woefully slow to get out of the gate, but interesting once you survive the first 20 minutes.  PG-13

The Insider

Follows the inside look at a whistleblower in the tobacco litigation wars that still rage today.  Another movie that seemed to hold a lot of promise but only delivered a portion of what it could have been.  If you know how the real event played out, there's no reason to see this portrayal other than some glimpses of behind-the-scenes events, but because of the dramatization needed to perk this story up, some of the tastiest bits may be fake.  R

Is Paris Burning?

This film focuses on the recapture of Paris from the Nazis during World War II.  A well done telling of a tale rarely covered in most of the history books and films that I've seen.  Keep an eye open for some appearances of well-known actors at early periods of their careers (Anthony Perkins, for one).  The fact that Gore Vidal wrote the screen play piqued my interest in this, as well.  May not appeal to all movie viewers, but should be well received by those who love a good war movie.   PG

Keeping The Faith

The story of 3 young adults, pals since elementary school, and how their divergent career paths (priest, rabbi, and business exec) careen back into each other.   Having seen the very unfunny previews on TV for this movie, and having great respect for Edward Norton's performance in American History X, I just couldn't bring myself to watch this movie, but The Wife insisted, so I relented.  Very slow in the beginning, it eventually evolves into a reasonably interesting story.  Heart warming, but the humor injected into the story is very unnatural and not very funny.    Religion, sexuality, some language. PG-13

The Kid

Bruce Willis plays a hardened Type A personality whose rushing through life with his business as his main focus.  He's then visited by some spirits who take him on a journey of re-discovery of those emotions he's buried during his life.  The plot is a bit thin in some parts, and doesn't unfold nicely on some details, but the story comes together within the last 10 minutes.  I for one hate it when movies try to wrap everything up neatly within the last scene, but that strike doesn't hold the film back entirely.  Willis is entertaining and puts on a very good performance.  The kid is loveable, and once you've found a soft spot for him, you'll enjoy the rest of the film.   PG

The King of Comedy

Howard Stern's radio show continuously makes references to this movie, and plays soundclips from it as well, so I finally satisfied my curiosity.  A laboriously plodding first half almost kills this plot before the second half gets cranking and saves the entirety.  Robert DeNiro plays a self-absorbed loser who deludes himself into starring on the top late night show, hosted by Jerry Lewis.  Sandra Bernhard plays an all too infrequently appearing obsessed fan of Lewis' who teams up with DeNiro to make both of their dreams come true.  PG

Kundun

Suffer through the first 10 minutes (starts s-l-o-w-l-y) and you'll be rewarded with a great story.  Difficult to understand the thick Chinese, I'm sorry, Tibetan, accents at times, but only with certain characters.  You'll want to be a Bhuddist by the end, and will forgive my cousin, Richard Gere, for being so annoying on the Free Tibet issue.  Special guest appearance by Chairman Mao.  PG-13

Life is Beautiful

After hearing Steven Spielberg comment on this picture & having seen Roberto Benigni, I wasn't sure what to expect.  This is simply a great film, done with perfect balance to the sensitivity of the subject matter.  I was thoroughly entertained.  I can understand the arguments that this film perhaps doesn't do enough to show how deplorable situations were for Italian jews at this time, but the film doesn't swerve in the opposite direction either, making a mockery of the situation.  Very funny and touching.  PG-13

Living Out Loud

Danny DeVito and Holly Hunter star in a muddied tale of self-searching.   Once again, a film that seems to be searching right along with its characters for what it is going to ultimately represent.  Holly and Danny find themselves dealing with different crises that have befallen them.  Semi-humorous in its approach, it tried to have its serious side, but both sides seemed to not be very well represented.   I love Holly Hunter, so that was enough to draw me in.  If anyone can explain the lesbian dance number to me, please do.  Slight sexuality, despair.  R

Little Voice

A quirky story of a young lady who can only communicate through mimicking legendary female singers of the 20th century.  I know what you're thinking, but it does work in a strange way.  Michael Caine gives a very humorous performance as a sleazy low level talent promoter.  Wonderful performances by all actors, including Ewan McGregor, of Episode I: The Phantom Menace fame.  My only complaint is the extreme difficulty in following the dialogue, which is mostly spoken in heavy Cockney accents.  R

Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels

Another promising film that is hampered by its very thick Cockney accents.   American audiences will be challenged to understand the dialogue.  However, the film is very clever in its storyline and I found it a very entertaining tale.   Relies heavily on irony, but I thought it worked in this instance.  The wife wasn't as impressed.  Violence, language. R

Meet The Parents

Ben Stiller stars as a lovable everyguy who takes the last step in committing to his fiance by meeting her parents.  The meeting fails in more ways than are imaginable, and the results are pretty funny.  Someone commented to me that they felt that some parts were too dark to be funny, and in a certain sense I agree.  This movie works at least 85% of the time, so I recommend it. Mild sexual situations, language. PG-13

The Mexican

Much anticipated teaming of Brad Pitt and Julie Roberts doesn't quite live up to expectations.  While I thought each of them put in good performances, the story here is the problem.  Pitt is involved in the mob and becomes tasked with retrieving a wayward associate and a pistol, both over the border in Mexico.  Complications arise that cause Pitt even more problems as he tries to hold together his relationship with girlfriend Roberts.  James Gandolfini puts in a quirky performance as an atypical hitman.  While this movie got butchered in the reviews, I found it had some redeeming value and was entertaining.  Violence, language, adult situations.   R

(+) Monster's Ball

Halle Berry and Billy Bob Thornton lead a decent cast.   I had high expectations for this film, since it garnered so much attention during the Oscars, but I found it a bit thin on story.  However, if you like to see Halle Berry or another hot blonde naked, then this movie is for you.  Gratuitous sex scenes are sprinkled throughout - well, perhaps 4 of them.  Unfortunately, they really don't do anything to enhance the plot, and seem to just waste time that could have been better used trying to fill in the weak spots in the story.  I liked the message, but it's been told in much better movies.  If you want to see a prison-themed redemption film, rent "The Green Mile".  Language, sexual content. R

Moulin Rouge

I looked at this with a really jaundiced eye, expecting some stupid musical, but I was pleasantly surprised.  The story was very good, and reminded me of La Boheme, and the music was actually very good.  It was difficult to believe that the actors themselves were responsible for the soundtrack, because it was good. PG-13

No Man's Land

Excellent foreign film about the Croatian-Serb war.   The film attempts to show the stupidity and futility of the struggle that took place, focusing on 2 individuals who meet up under strange circumstances.  Very well done, with a totally believable storyline. Language, violence. R

Notting Hill

Julia Roberts and Hugh Grant in a romantic comedy.  Has some weak spots here and there, but I'd call it entertaining overall.  The guy who plays Hugh's roommate is entertaining in his boorishness.  R.

October Sky

Based on true events during America's pursuit of the race to space, during the era of Sputnik.   A coal mining town produces 4 high school kids who attempt to make themselves better and rise above their surroundings by studying rocketry.   Seemed to be too formulaic to be palpable, but the most cliched items were supposedly true.  Laura Dern takes a spin as the inspirational teacher who urges her young charges on as the rest of the town blocks their energies.  Black lung, rockets, 50's.  PG

Office Space

Yuppie struggles to make sense of modern day office routine.  I related to this in some ways, and found it pretty funny.  The Wife thought it was amusing in some parts, but I don't think she'd watch it again.   Definitely a male movie.  Crude humor. R

One True Thing

William Hurt, Meryl Streep, and Renee Zellweger (Jerry Maguire) put in solid efforts in a real tear-jerker of a movie.  Renee Zellweger plays a hip self-centered Gen Xer who is forced to contemplate her position in life through a series of familial crises.  Meryl Streep does her usual bit of making a character totally believable.  The only drawback to this movie was Renee's voice, which is simply too squeaky/sexy for serious drama roles.  I found her voice much too distracting, but not enough to seriously damage an otherwise fine film.  Emotion.  R

The Opposite of Sex

Christina Ricci (of "Adams Family" fame) plays one of the most deliciously evil characters I've seen.  Christina is a trashy teenage girl who embarks on a journey of questionable but decidedly selfish intent, who narrates the movie from her perspective, and attempts to manipulate every adult and peer that she encounters.   Lisa Kudrow puts in a solid performance as a shrewish woman who catches on to Christina's character's true angle.  An entertaining tale that keeps you guessing with its odd plot twists.  Lyle Lovett provides the one weak spot, giving a truly wooden performance as a lovelorn local sheriff.  Vulgar language, mild violence, abnormal sexual situations.  R

The Patriot

If you've seen Braveheart, and you liked it, then you'll probably like this film.  A bit formulaic, it's the common tale of widowed man who once was a warrior, but who has given up those ways to live a quieter life, but is forced to relive his warrior ways after his family is threatened.  Despite some of the movie being very predictable (If you can't tell me who Mel Gibson is going to end up being paired with, then you must be dumb), it is a fun romp through American Revolutionary history with much liberty taken when it comes to facts.  Excellent special effects put a topper on this.  Violence. R

Pearl Harbor (in theaters)

After watching a special on the making of this film, the hype worked and I dragged The Wife to the theaters to see it in its full screen glory.  The acting is fine, the story is given its due, and overall it works.  My only quibble is with the special effects.  The planes seem to be much faster and more nimble than they would be in real life.  Because of this, I got the sense that the filmmakers were trying much too hard to heighten the ferocity of the attack.  Minor quibble, and one that probably wouldn't be noticeable to non aviation afficianados.  The audience in this showing was actually less civil than in "The Fast and the Furious" showing, despite the more mature audience at "Pearl".  We had a set of couples in their 60' behind us that talked throughout the film, mostly about their own experiences during the war.  The topper?  The one woman muttering "Those bastards!" over and over as the Japanese attack ripped into the ships and the effects were shown in detail on-screen.  Violence - a lot, sexuality, a Baldwin brother.   PG-13

Pleasantville

Although the premise of this movie seems to hold the ability to be either bad or good, I found the premise to be solid - characters become stuck in a 50's family TV show.  However, the story has thin spots that you can see through.  Necessary development of plot  is spotty, and certain assumed situations are never touched upon, which leaves the plot a bit wobbly.  At the end of the movie you'll be able to pick it apart pretty quickly if you give it much thought.  The big surprise that I found was the moral of the movie seems to be "Knowledge, and especially carnal knowledge, makes the world a colorful place."  I found the message pretty disturbing and without much merit.  Sexual situations, pretty hefty need for suspension of disbelief. PG-13

Quills

Geoffrey Rush and Kate Winslet are excellent as the Marquis de Sade and his slightly misguided helper.  Add on top of their good performances the great performance of Michael Caine as the evil doctor sent to 'cure' the Marquis, and this movie has all the right stuff.  Funny and spell binding. Sexuality, nudity, violence, all the good stuff. R

The Red Violin

A fascinating movie which is enhanced by the less you know about the plot.   Samuel L. Jackson is the only real big name in this, yet his character is probably the weakest of the whole story.  Entertaining many times over.  R.

Remember The Titans

Denzel Washington stars as the embattled black coach that is chosen to help integrate a Virginia high school football program.  A powerful story that seems a bit formulaic and predictable, but in the end provides some genuine entertainment.   Very good performances given by the younger actors, and in some ways outshine Denzel's performance.  Mild language. PG

Ronin

I wasn't quite sure how to rate this film at first, but The Wife chimed in that she thought it was a solidly good movie.  Since it isn't as much of a 'guy' movie as I first believed, I'll recommend it.  Robert DeNiro stars as a criminal-for-hire who attempts to stay alive while working with other criminal elements.   Although the film takes place in France, the characters are from all over the globe, and would be expected to have various accents.  However, I found I couldn't understand the first 20 minutes of dialog, even when the Americans were speaking.   Add on top of that a very difficult plot to follow, and you might not make it through the movie.  If you can make it over that 20 minute hump, you'll have yourself an exciting action thriller.  A lot of graphic violence, but it is made much more palpable by victimizing inherently annoying French natives.  Full of twists and turns that I love so.  Solid cast.  One of the best modern car chases I've witnessed, with special queues taken from Princess Diana's final ride. Tres magnifique! R

Rounders

Matt Damon and Edward Norton star as highschool chums who've gotten off to a slightly rocky start to their adulthoods.  Damon is trying to make amends by attending law school, but Norton quickly drags him back down to where they left off before Norton went to prison for his and Damon's earlier transgressions.  As much as I hate to admit it, Damon is a solid actor, and impressed me with his performance.  If you liked Damon's performance in Good Will Hunting, then you'll like this film.   The Wife didn't seem to get into this film as much as I did, so it is probably more a 'guy' film.  R

Runaway Bride

Julia Roberts and Richard Gere in a romantic comedy.  These two make a pretty good team, and they're given a strong story to work with.  A bit preachy here and there, with some unbalanced morality tossed in at one point, but the comedy level and amount worked for me.  Funny and enjoyable.  PG-13.

Rushmore

An odd and ecclectic movie concerning the life of a misfit private school student.  Bill Murray does a small but entertaining bit as a down-to-earth but flaky tycoon who tangles with and befriends the student.  The only thing I found holding this movie back was the way subplots were introduced without much depth or fanfare, and then left hanging for odd intervals of time, only to suddenly be revisited.  Never boring, though.  R

Saving Private Ryan

A very realistic, and therefore, very disturbing look at World War II combat.  Tom Hanks plays a captain sent to Normandy for the D-Day invasion and eventually assigned to retrieve a young soldier, played by Matt Damon, for a trip stateside.  What makes this film so disturbing is the unbelievably graphic portrayal of wartime violence, and the realization that it is not exaggerated.  This film makes John Wayne's catalog of war flicks look like so much bullsh*t.  R

Scary Movie

Very humorous send up of various modern day horror flicks.  As precursors to this movie, you should have the following movies already under your belt in order to get the full effect:  Scream, I Know What You Did Last Summer, The Sixth Sense, Matrix.  The Wife, not being a fan of horror films, had seen only one of these yet still enjoyed the jokes.  Be warned - the humor is definitely adult in nature but somehow rises above being boorish.  Sexual situations, teen angst, language, drugs.  R

Shakespeare In Love

A great story that is entertaining from beginning to end.  The actors put in great performances that only enhance an already fantastic film.  Gwyneth Paltrow and Ralph Fiennes (Elizabeth) are excellent as the starstruck couple in love.  Definitely worth renting again.  R

A Simple Plan

Billy Bob Thorton and Bill Paxton head up the cast of this interesting tale.  An illustration of how each important decision in life can affect every other decision.  I can't talk about the events of the story without giving away too much, so I'll just say that I found it very similar to a nightmare I have every now and then.   The Wife, however, thought it was a little too unbelievable.  I found it interesting just the same. R

6 Days, 7 Nights

Anne Hecht, formerly hetero and current lifemate of Ellen Degeneres, and Harrison Ford team up in this film to join that odd list of "older man, younger woman" actor pairings.  Anne plays a fast-moving NYC executive who decides to take a vacation break with boyfriend David Schwimmer.  Harrison Ford plays the crusty ascerbic ex-patriot charter pilot who flies the couple to their final destination.  An adventure unfolds and inner reflection begins.  I liked this movie only because Anne Hecht wears skimpy tropical outfits.  The Wife liked the movie, but didn't give it a full 'good' rating.  Worth a look.  PG-13

The Sixth Sense

Interesting from beginning to end.  In retrospect some of the plot falls apart as you examine it, but while watching it the film works well.  Bruce Willis adds to his credits.  PG-13

Snatch

Another solid effort from Guy Ritchie.  My only complaint was the overuse of the f-bomb, which seems to be near epidemic levels in movies today.  The sad thing is a movie this good would never miss the obscenities that litter the dialogue, although in a crime themed movie such as this, it can be argued that it does add a bit to the realism.  Anyway, this movie is cast in the same mold as Ritchie's earlier Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels.  Some very hip shot angles, seques, and another comedic cast of nasties plays out a complex, crime soaked story line.  Excellent acting.  Strong language, violence.  R

Snow Falling On Cedars

Promising movie falls short in delivering the artful story that the title paints.  Both I and The Wife felt that the story was good, but that the movie style just didn't help it at all.  The movie doles out the plot in maddeningly slow flashbacks and dreams.  Jumps ahead, and then uses a flashback to backfill gaping holes in our comprehension.  Done differently this could have been a fine movie - I'm willing to bet the book, if there is one, is excellent.  Northwest woods-bound sexually charged scenery, racial prejudices.  PG-13

Southpark: Bigger, Longer, and Uncut

Absolutely horrific in its use of profanity and mature themes, but still about the funniest movie I've seen in years.  Granted, the humor is mostly in the shock value of the material, but I watched this thing 3 times and still roared at several points.  Beware!  The musical numbers (there are many!) are very catchy, but the lyrics are definitely not suitable for public singing, so you'll just have to mumble them to yourself.  Outrageous language, sexual situations, Sadam Hussein homosexuality.  R

Startup.com

Not nearly as good as it should have been, it still gets a good rating from me because it's the closest we're going to get to seeing the inside rise-n-fall of a dot.com business.  This appealed to me because of my work in the IT industry, so this movie might be a bit ponderous without that hook.  Starts slow, but if you can survive the first 30 minutes then you'll enjoy the rest of it. Language. R

State and Main

This review is easy - Yuck!  Reading the jacket of the DVD, one would assume that it held promise, but those responsible for this - be they director or scriptwriter - should be punished for their lack of pride in this mess.  William Macy and Alec Baldwin go to waste - neither are capable of lifting this up out of its own morosity.  This movie had less reason to be made then the movie involved in the story.  An insult to all Vermonters!  Poor storyline, uninspired performances. BM - for 'big mess'.

There's Something About Mary

Why this picture was so popular is beyond me.  The only explanations I can think of is that people are so desperate for good comedy that they grabbed hold of anything that came close to fitting the bill (this pic doesn't) or that the general populace is so moronic that they simply don't recognize quality entertainment (most probably).  Liberal use of the word 'f*ck' simply pushes this trash into the 'discard' bin.  The only concession I can make is that there are perhaps 2 of the funniest scenes that briefly flash across the screen.  Unfortunately, there was such ponderous amounts of crap in between that I can't even remember what they were.  Unfunny humor, minimalist originality, language.  R

Three Kings

Excellent movie just misses a no-holds barred recommendation with a few thin spots in the treatment and unnecessarily vulgar language.  I don't care if you think it adds realism, it simply detracts from the picture as a whole!  Touches upon disenchantment of individuals caught up in the Gulf War on the American side.  Great performances by George Clooney and Mark Wahlberg, with a nice supporting performance by Ice Cube.  A caustic look at motivations for actions during the conflict, the movie fails to carry the lesson through or hammer it home at some point.  A quick feel-good ending does a disservice to the whole story.  Unnecessary use of 'f*ck'.  R

Traffic

Michael Douglas stars as the incoming Federal drug czar as the country continues its battle against drugs on all levels. He soon finds the war visits his own house.  Excellent performances from all the cast, the story was able to involve me, move me, disturb me, and hold your interest throughout.  While I was all set to hate Catherine Zeta Jones, she actually was a credit to the acting in this, and was a true asset.  The one thing I kept going over after the film was 'Why did Benicio del Toro   get such praise from his part in this'?  While his part is excellent, he didn't have to show any range of emotion - much like Huey Lewis in 'Duets'.  Yes, it worked very well here, but let's wait until this guy gets a few more parts under his belt before we start to rave about him.  Sexuality, substance abuse, violence, language.  R

Training Day

Great movie! This one kept me on the edge of my seat.   Very intense!  Denzel Washington is great as a grey hat guy, teetering on the edge between right and wrong. Language, violence, drugs. R

Waking Ned Devine

A touching and entertaining story about a lottery winner in a small Irish village.  Maybe I'm getting old but I really found this movie cute, and I liked it because of that.  Funny and heartwarming.  Extreme Senior nudity PG

The Waterboy

Adam Sandler's inexplicably popular farce about a socially stunted adult and his discovery of hidden athletic ability.  Kathy Bates loses a few points by appearing in this abomination.  Henry Winkler puts us on notice that he'll be appearing as a celebrity spokesman for psychic phone lines any time.  Could have been, should have been funny, but just wasn't.  PG-13

Way of the Gun

Not a 'solid movie' as the icon means, but still an interesting tale.   Benicio del Toro (Traffic) stars as half of a 2 man crime team that has decided to kidnap an unborn child.  Juliette Lewis gives what I guess is a good performance as the surrogate mom that's been hired by a mob family to produce a child for the head.  The 2 guys who play the muscle for the mob head seem oddly cast and look more like Feds than mobsters.  This had me confused for the first 20 minutes of the pic, which caused me a lot of confusion during subsequent events, until it became obvious that they were indeed mobsters.  Lots of tension and suspense, in my eyes, helps make this entertaining.  The Wife was less impressed, so put this one once again into the 'Guy Flick' category.  Mucho violence & bloodshed, language.   R

The Wedding Singer

Another Adam Sandler vehicle that manages to stay afloat throughout the whole picture.  Saved in large part by the wonderfully talented Drew Barrymore, Sandler underplays his humor and actually contributes to the story of an unsatisfied wedding singer (whoever heard of someone describing themselves, or anyone, as a 'wedding singer'?) and his pursuit of true love, and ultimately, personal satisfaction.  As an 80's decade child myself, the soundtrack for this film held great meaning for me.  If you aren't from this era, you may want to skip this film.  On the other hand, if you like Drew, this film is for you.  PG-13

(-) What Women Want

This movie disappointed me because it was inconsistent in its story and its style.  The Wife picked this one, and I will admit I had predetermined that I would hate it.  The beginning scenes started to convince me that I had been all wrong about it, but some real jumps in storyline and a very inconsistent style and story shot it back into the 'don't bother' category.  Mel Gibson plays a guy who acquires the ability/curse to hear women's thoughts.  However, this ability comes and goes inconsistently during the film and seems much too convenient, in that Mel only hears things when it works with that part of the story.  At other points in the story, when the focus shifts onto other problems, the ability disappears without explanation.  I hate that in a movie.  Contrived ending sealed the fate of this one, even though I love Helen Hunt.  I can't believe that women want this.  Inconsistent story, wasted potential in story.  PG-13