Both/And

Both/And

Shaman sickness proceeds to an end,
towards a conclusion.
A very long illness, pregnant

with meanings, lessons,
and gifts;

Realizing, on one plane,

I am not "berdache," not your prostitute, not your plaything, not all those things your penis-brain substitute imagines me to be, wishes to force into being

Dealing in a language that

cannot fathom the word "not"

And/both/then --

Yes, a sodomite, yes, queer
Yes transfuckinganything
Yes Both/And Christ/Antichrist

simulcast, combined, a unity
a multiplicity...

...Trying to write this poem
in a language most certainly
not built
to handle the

concept
reality
pleasure
Kundalini intense

The power of Goddess Juice,

even at its weakest
strength

The Goddess Juice that

burns away the impure,
the unholy, and those
who mistake
hate, pain, violence and pestilence
for love, for Goddess, for
sacramental sensuality.