The other day (May, 1995) I received a long, rambling letter from a beloved friend, one who calls every few weeks "to hear your encouraging voices". In it, she repeatedly apologized for her "negativity", but also referred to her attempts to "let go and let God". She went into great detail about her current difficulties, another pending eviction, a reduction in her supplemental social security income, and her inability to find "suitable" housing. She also stated that people at the various support agencies were unwilling to help her further.

As stated earlier, she is loved, unconditionally accepted without judgment, exactly as she is. She has had an admittedly trying time over the past twenty years, with the death of a wealthy husband, disinheritance by dubious tactics, terrorism to discourage her efforts to "fight back", alcoholism (which she overcame), and total rejection (even legal eviction) by her mother. And yet she "keeps on keeping on", aware at one level that "all works for good", that she is growing spiritually in her own particular way. And she knows she is loved.

Her letter (with supporting documentation) told how she was being unfairly treated by the housing authority, which refused to continue to subsidize a two bedroom apartment even though a psychiatrist confirmed in 1988 that she "suffers from a major depressive disorder associated with claustrophobia symptoms" and a neurologist stated in 1995 that "she requires supportive live-in assistance". It also told how the Social Security Administration was reducing her disability benefits due to evidence that she was receiving unreported support from outside sources.

While I could feel compassion for her difficulties, as I have for the many crises and debacles over the years, I also had the knowing that she was creating these events for the growth of her consciousness of Self. And then the awareness that her lessons were for the growth of consciousness of Self in ALL of Its parts, including mine. She is not separate and apart from me, her lesson IS my lesson, and I could suddenly see, because I was not directly experiencing the emotional trauma, just what that lesson is.

Despite our spiritual growth, as human beings we decide just how we want life to be. At our lower level of consciousness, we decide what it is we like, what it is we want, and how we want things to be. And we set out to make them that way, without any thought of how others may want them to be. And if others ideas don't perfectly mesh with ours, we try to force them to change to fit our ideas. If there are established systems to take care of our needs, and we don't like those systems, we buck the system, and we try to swim upstream against a mighty river.

If we don't succeed in changing the system, or in swimming upstream, we become frustrated, and tired, and angry, and depressed. And then we don't feel Love, for Love is unconditional acceptance of Itself, all that IS.

The solution, of course, is always easy to see from the outside. All we have to do is turn downstream, to "go with the flow" and let the river gently carry us to our destination. We must let go of what "i" (the little I) want, in order to know what I AM. And then we begin to know that there is only One Self, and that I AM LOVE.