Lynn Jacobson’s comments at the memorial service for Bruce at First Lutheran Church in Tacoma, Washington, 7 August 1999:

I was a classmate of Bruce’s at Stadium High School here in Tacoma. What I remember from way back then is that Bruce was way ahead of the rest of us. He was smart, confident, philosophical and funny. While many of us were running around obsessing about who liked whom and what we should wear, Bruce was following his interests, learning things, finding out about people. At that time, and probably still, the halls of Stadium were practically choked with a cloud of teen angst and self-consciousness. But Bruce was a blast of fresh air. He was one of the least self-absorbed people I knew. He had a great laugh, which popped out of the side of his mouth like a firecracker.

Bruce was a gifted writer, and after we graduated, he sent me many letters. At first he wrote about the heat of St. Louis; then, about this really great woman he had met. Later, he wrote about their wedding; and even later, about the birth of their children.

One letter I remember in particular came early on, when he was still in St. Louis. He had gone to see a performance by a dance company, and knowing that I was a dance fan, he grabbed a poster at the show, turned it over, and wrote to me on the back of it. He filled this huge white space with his tiny little script, describing each dance to me one by one.

This was Bruce. He didn’t have a one-size-fits-all public persona that he shared with everyone; instead, he made an effort to build singular relationships with all the people in his life. He shared your passions and discoveries. Your interests became his interests; your troubles, his troubles; your dreams, his dreams . . . for you.

This ability to see beyond himself, to care about others more than himself--I think it’s called maturity. Bruce had it in spades, and he had it way, way before the rest of us. By the time he was in his mid-20s, he was a true grown-up, with all the wisdom, integrity and compassion that this word implies.