I did The Landmark Forum in Tulsa, Oklahoma, in October, 1995. The tools I learned about are still making my life better. A case in point:
Last year, in June, 1998, I was in Dallas for my 52nd birthday and my son who was almost 30 years old was to pick me up and take me out for a birthday dinner . When he arrived, he had a brand new car, a Volkswagen Jetta.
Thanks to The Landmark Forum, I was able to say with absolute sincerity, "Honey, this is a great car! You've wanted a Jetta since you were 15 years old and now you have one! Boy, this thing really MOVES on the Tollway, doesn't it? And the air conditioning doesn't even seem to drag on the engine. You're really going to enjoy this!"
Not a miracle you say? Well, let me tell you, the words in my head that I did NOT say went something like this: "Are you sure you can afford this? What are the payments? Do you make that kind of money? Are you going to be able to eat and pay for this buggy?"
You see, thanks to The Landmark Forum, I was able to see my son as a grown man, not "my little boy," and have confidence that he was perfectly able to know if he could afford the car or not. I could even see that if he made a mistake, he would be able to handle whatever it was he would need to do to rectify the situation. Most of all, I was able to see that IT WAS NONE OF MY BUSINESS!
My son still has the car. In fact, he is ahead on the payments, though I have no idea what those payments are. And we have a wonderful relationship. He can tell me what he chooses, and he can count on me not to pry into his life. I know that such prying doesn't constitute caring or respect for him as a person, and above all I respect and love him. I want him to know that always.
Want to get closer to your children, and have a clear vision of what's appropriate instead of reacting out of your past, or worse, your parents' past? Take The Landmark Forum. And I promise, that's the last time I'll give you ANY maternal advise.
Suzanne S., Tulsa Oklahoma
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This page was last updated on 09/25/2002.