About Me

My Spiritual Journey

About Me

I am a 43 year old housewife.Who has recently met and married the love of her life.My interests are varied and include,Searching for the meaning of life,Coming to know and understand God as my father,animals, art, photography .

My info

100 Things about me

W.A.I.B. Written about in blog. Marked with asterisk. Will be written about in more detail.

1. I was raised in a broken home.

2.I have 3 sisters and two brothers.

3.I have 3 children.

4. I was raised Catholic.

5.I also attended episcopal church on occasion.

6.God was portrayed to me as being a mean father.

7.I started tuning everything out when I went to church. I didn't even want to hear it.

8.From age 10 to 12 we lived with our abusive alcholic grandmother. She thought she was far above anyone else. We constantly heard 'Ifyou aren't white and a member of the country club. That basicaly you were trash. She died of alcholism when I was in my 20's.

9.I became a wild and rebellious teenager.

10.At 14 I was court ordered to live in a girls home for two years.

11. At 16 I returned home.

12. I love animals especially cats.

13. I volunteered at the humane society for several years.

14.I graduated high school at 17.

15.At 18 I started working at a local nightclub.(This was during the disco era)

16. I met and married my first husband.He was Jewish, A body builder, and very abusive. Prone to flying into terrible rages. I often feared for my life.

17. I got pregnant.Had my first child.Had an abortion 6 months later.

18. Three months later I was pregnant again.

19. Left my husband.

20. Went back to working in night clubs.

21.Met and married my second husband.

22. Had one child.

23. Marriage collapsed.

24. My third child was raised by her father and his wonderful grandmother.

25.Went back to working in night clubs. So I could support myself and two children.

26. I refused public assistance.

27.I developed a drinking problem.

28. I had an Out of Body experience.(W.A.I.B.)

29.I met and married my third husband.

30. We bought a place in the country.

31.For the next 9 years I became pretty much reclusive.

32. My husband and I fought constantly about the kids.

33. My children began to rebel. As I had.

34.I couldn't wait for night time when I would drink at least a court of beer. Sometimes two.

35.It got to the point where alcahol no longer worked but left me depressed.

36. I began to search for God.I would take long walks with my huskys and just sit in the woods and pray.

37. For a long time I didn't think God was listening. And even started to question his existence. But non the less I continued to pray. I kept begging God to remove the desire to drink. I couldn't handle it any more.

38. My daughter had gotten pregnant by that time. We arranged for an open adoption.

39. Things continued to esculate.

40. One night I went and sat outside and started praying. In desperation I cried out to God. "Lord if you are there remove this desire to drink or please let me die in my sleep. I can't handle it any more.

41. The next night something would happen that would change my life forever.***

To Be Continued..

.Written about in weblog under God answers my desperate plea.

About this blog

Here I'll describe why I started this blog and describe the topics I'm primarily interested in covering in it.

Gondolas in Venice; Size=240 pixels wide

This could be a picture of me, my town, or a recent trip I took.

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The Light Shine's Through the Darkness But the Darkness has Yet to Realize It.