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Dear Captain Jack Sparrow,
Remember me? It's Bloodletter. I need yer advice on a problem I have with the ladies in the port. What I mean is, everytime I come to the villages, I feel like they're always judging me. They always tell me that I should be just like them. In other words, wearing a dress, acting proper and staying on land. What should I say to all of this?
Sincerely,
Yer mate Captain Bloodletter

Dear Captain Bloodletter,
People will always judge you, no matter what you do. The best thing to do is to stay true to who you are. Your true friends will accept you. People are always judging me and wanting to clap me in irons. You'd think they could just leave a body alone. But that's the way people are. Follow yer heart, lass.
Captain Jack Sparrow

Dear Jack,
I'm a young woman who ran away from home, (my dad is a major stiff) married a pirate, left the pirate, and now I have no place to go. I've read all about you. I was a pirate meself until I got marooned. So, if ye don't mind, could you please give me an idea of were to go? Thanx.
Dead men tell no tales,
Sara Cutthroat Norrington

Dear Sara,
If you're relating to the Norrington I know, I don't blame ye fer runnin' away. As to where to go now, I can suggest the nearest port where ye can hop on another pirate ship, but after that it's up to you. Ye can always go home, but that's hard after leavin'. Ye should at least let yer folks know where you are so they won't worry. Good luck!
Captain Jack Sparrow

Dearest Jack,
Captain Andi here, just writin' in to set the record straight. I read a letter you got from a pirate off a ship I pillaged......and no, I'm not sorry for him...it's part of bein' a pirate and he should get used to it. Also, yes, my nickname got changed to Malfaisant...the way "Gray" spelled it was phoenetical. Now, Jack, you're a great pirate and may I say a legend in your time, so I would never attack ya unless you attacked me, but I'm warnin' anyone else who reads this.....yes, if you cross my path I'll plunder yer ship and take everything yer own, even the clothes off yer back if I like them. My crew is mean and fearless. We don't pick and choose, God rules his territory without concern for species or status and SO DO WE! Ye be warned. Anyways, Jack....if ya see red sails on yer horizon, don't attack...I'd very much like to meet ya.
Yours eternally,
Captain Andi "Malfaisant" Scott
P.S. and yes.....I am a woman and if anyone has a problem with that, then attack my ship...I'll leave yours in cinders!

Dear Captain Scott,
Ye sound like a fearful pirate. I'll be sure to keep an eye out for ye. If ye see black sails, ye'll know it's me.
Captain Jack Sparrow

Yo ho me hardee,
This is Mel the Meanie. I have another problem. My pirate teacher wants me to do something but me don't want to do it. Should I tell him or should I be unhappy?
Mel the Meanie

Dear Mel,
A pirate never got anywhere if he was meek. Yer name is Mel the Meanie! Live up to yer name and tell him off! That's the true pirate way, mate! Ye might just get an "A" for it!
Captain Jack Sparrow

Hey Jack!
You're a funny pirate, and I want to know how you deal with people, like Commodore Norrington, who is mean to you.
Kathryne

Dear Kathryne,
Mostly I try to avoid people who are mean to me. It makes my life more pleasant.
Captain Jack Sparrow

To all yeh female pirates out there,
Pay no attention to the drunken words of the "proper ladies", they know nothing of the joys of being the most feared FEMALE pirate captain - that's right, it's me, NOT Bermy Barbossa! HA! Anyway, if all yeh lasses are still 'aving problems, and know not what to do about these women, come to Tortuga in abou' a month, and I'll take yeh aboard meh ship. I'll teach you to fight, curse like a pirate should, in other words, I'll teach you to be like me! For lessons on how to beh like Captain "Dirty" Ethel Kidd, go to this site, I'll see you there, and teach you all I know! http://ethelkidd.proboards31.com/
~CAPTAIN Ethel Kidd
P.S. This URL works!

Dear Captain E. Kidd,
Aye, the more resources for our pirate mates, the better. Perhaps ye can better address the female pirate problems. But I hate to lose me loyal fans, so be sure to remind them to "Ask Jack" about general pirating concerns. I wish you luck with yer new site!
Captain Jack Sparrow

Dear Jack,
Once again it is Elizabeth. Will came back but Elizabeth did not. It worries me, but I would love for her to come back. Well, my friend Giselle (do you know her?) keeps saying how sorry she is and wishes you two would come back together, and she has another man named Justin on her heels. But believe me, I know how that feels! I feel sorry for burning the rum. In that case I will send you a lot of it! I don't understand why you want to stay away from me (the e-mail) but I have no intention of talking to her. She called me a bloody pirate! Will has made about 20 swords for you and your crew.
Your Friend,
Elizabeth

Dear Elizabeth,
Giselle was nice, but I'm in hiding now, so probably won't see her again anytime soon. I'll pick up the swords when I bring you Little Elizabeth. I'll sneak in as soon as I can.
Captain Jack Sparrow

Dear Jack,
It's Barbossa! Ye thought I was dead aye? Well Jack (the monkey) gave me a coin befores I was dead. I'll be back to get me ship! And yer friends, well they will have a sad time before I'm finished with them! Oh, and my daughter didn't take the baby I did!
Your enemy,
Captain Barbossa

Dear Captain Barbossa,
Okay, who sent in this prank letter? Was it you, Will, or maybe Norrington? Or one of you nasty-hearted pirates out there? We all know Barbossa died, I shot him myself and saw the blood pouring out of his chest. No living skeleton would do that. So cut it out.
Captain Jack Sparrow

Captain Jack Sparrow,
This here is me, Geynavierre (ugh, I HATE THAT NAME!!!), Gwyn. I'm a lass of 14 an' I was awonderin' if I ever got on your lovely Black Pearl, what would ye do to me? Cause I'm runnin' from me mum and an arranged marrage. Can ya help me? I won't be of any bother, promise. Savvy? Rum don't bother me none. So, matey, think on it will ya?
The pirate, Gwyn
P.S.- I HATE DRESSES!!!!!

Dear Gwyn,
Sorry, I'm not takin' on any new crew right now. Too risky. But I wish ye luck. (Seems like I'm doing that a lot lately.)
Captain Jack Sparrow

Captain,
Me be 14 years old and a lass, Rugged Lark. I get a lot o' trouble from other pirates. Things like, "This here lass is too small to sail a pirate ship!" (I gave that one a good scar on both sides of his 'purty' cheek for that!) How do I stop it? Also, I heard alot 'bout you. Me crew is only about 8 or so sailors cause no one wants to sail under a girl (especially of 14). If I run into your lovely Black Pearl, could we maybe join, savvy? Me ship's the Black Mare. Other than sailing, I love to race horses in competitions. Another question mate, how do I run away from an arranged marrage? I told the man no about 10,000 times! Commodore Norrington is getting on my nerves!!!! He don't know me a pirate. (hehehe) Along wif the marriage, me mum's threatining to arrest me for piracy if I don't stop, so I ran away to the sea. Was I right in doing that? Thanks a bunch, matey!
Yer fellow pirate,
Cosette (hate that name, me be German) "Rugged Lark" Shecklouski (don't ask me how to prounouce it)

Dear Rugged Lark,
I hope ye read the previous letter. Besides, I don't know much about horses, 'cept they're useful for pulling carriages. Sorry I can't help you.
Captain Jack Sparrow

Captain,
Me be 14 and a lass, Kay. I have a question for ye: Do ya ever feel the thunder through your being? Lightening in your veins? Cause if ya do, cool matey! That is the one reason (or 2) for me being a pirate. Instead of ships, I do horses. I raid villages on horseback in disguise and be at home getting a beating for 'staying out late' and wearing pants. I daresay it's hard to ride in a dress! Especially riding a horse without a saddle at an all-out gallop! Should I run away from me mam who forces me into a corset, in which I can't breathe and a father who drinks so much he beats on me fer no reason? I want to, but then I'd have nowhere to go. Could the Black Pearl be willing to rescue me from this hell of a home? Please! I beg of you! Ouch! Me da just slapped me. Great, me nose is broke. Please answer!!
Your desperate horse pirate,
Kay Dannaher

Dear Pirate Kay,
What is it with you 14 year old girls? Being a pirate is a hard life, and I cannot rescue you from your misfortunes. As far as your method of pirating from the back of a horse, you need to find Rugged Lark. Sounds like she can help you out.
Captain Jack Sparrow

Dear Captain Sparrow,
You are my last hope & I pray you can help me, as I need it quite desperately! I saw you in Port Royale several weeks ago. Though you appeared barely able to keep your balance and stay conscious, with your rather unique experiences, I believe you are the only one who can help me. I have acquired a rather unusual piece of jewelry, although how is not important. It is a ring with some very distinctive markings on it, which closely resemble a dagger embedded in a treasure chest of some sort. Ever since I acquired the ring, I have experienced very strange dreams where I am surrounded by pirates who have me locked in the brig of their ship. In the dream they keep chanting about the "Scourge of the Black Sea" and they want me to tell them the location of the ring! I refuse to tell them and then I wake up, just before they do me in! I have a feeling that this ring holds a great deal of significance and I am inclined to hold tight to it. During the last few days, however, I’m quite sure I’m being followed around Port Royale and I’m worried that my recent dream is about to come to pass, much to my dismay! Please, Captain Sparrow, what should I do? Can you advise me in some way?
Sincerely,
Lady Diana La Salle

Dear Lady La Salle,
There are unusual and mysterious things in the world, lass, and I think you've come across one of them. Dreams can have a way of coming true, so I suggest you take it seriously. I'm coming in to Port Royale very soon and I will find you to discuss this ring. If I were you, I'd put it in a safe place and TELL NO ONE ABOUT IT! If you are, indeed, being followed, then they will not harm you if they don't know where the ring is. Maybe we'll take a voyage to the Black Sea...it's time I got away for awhile so Norrington will maybe forget about me. Sweet dreams until I see you...
Captain Jack Sparrow

Dear Captain Sparrow,
Thank you for offering your help and kind words. Since I last wrote you, I have returned home to find my house in complete disarray and disorder. Those who search for this ring seem bound and determined to find it! It has become too dangerous for me to stay in Port Royale any longer and I must leave at once! Are you in a position to offer me safe passage off the island or can you direct me to someone who can provide a discreet means of leaving Port Royale? I must find out what mystical qualities this ring may possess.
Lady Diana La Salle

Dear Lady La Salle,
I will find you in the next few days. We'll discuss what to do in person. Thanks for your trust. It sounds like a fun adventure!
Captain Jack Sparrow

Dear Jack,
Sorry it took so long time ta reply to ya cos I just found a secret place that no one knows unless they know where it is and it ain't ye secret place. But I 'ave been told from this place somewhere southeast of Tortuga (there are 15 islands around there), that my parents used ta know ya and they 'ave sailed on ya ship. I don’t know what they look like or their last name, but I got told that I got named afta The Black Pearl in your honour or somethin' like that. I do know that my mother spent all her time in the galley and my father spent most of his time up in the crew’s nest. Sadly in the end both of my parents died in a battle that nearly lost ya the Pearl. My mother’s name was Bleeding Hart, but that's what she got called and my father's was Black Hart or something like that. I 'ave no idea why they got called that, but that is what I got told by this freaky man who claimed to 'ave seen them. I do 'ave something that belongs to them - a ring that has the initials BH and a journal which mentions ya in it and have thier time on the Pearl, a sketch of you and of the Pearl. Also, I 'ave a medallion of some sort. It is gold and has the Pearl on it and a skull and crossed swords, and I know about the curse of Cortez - I got told it when I was little. Is Elizabeth married to Will Turner yet or not? I do know them, but it's a long story - some other time I'll tell ya. I got Norrington on my tail. Help me find more 'bout them.
Luv,
Captain `bleeding hart’ Pearl

Dear Captain Pearl,
I do remember yer parents, they were fine pirates. Unfortunately, I can't remember much about their past before they came to the Black Pearl. They did die in a fierce battle with a British merchant brig. But they fought bravely, lass. I don't know about the ring, journal, or medallion, but they might be worth somethin' someday, so I'd keep ahold of 'em. Elizabeth and Will are married. Read back to earlier letters from them. Good luck on your adventures.
Captain Jack Sparrow
P.S. The sketch of me will probably become quite valuable, so put it in a safe place!

Dear Captain,
Ahoy Mate! I simply adore your fashion sense. Can you tell me where a young pirate might find some snazzy threads like yours?
Pirate Versace

Dear Pirate Versace,
Like any good pirate, I've accumulated my limited but distinguished wardrobe from the people I've pillaged. Finding clothes that fit is more of a problem than finding clothes that are fashionable. Any clothes can look good with the right kind of accessories. Happy hunting!
Captain Jack Sparrow

Dear Cap'n Jack,
I'm a bonny lass currently residin' in Tortuga. I've seen ye around before and I've heard stories about your many adventures. Let me just tell ye, I think ye to be a very gorgeous pirate! I'd be willing to drink a swig o' rum with ye under the shinin' moonlight. I have many acquaintances who'd love to spend time with Will, but I'd give up all me treasure to spend some time with ye... And I'll tell ye mate, congratulations on gettin' the Pearl back! Ye be the greatest pirate I've ever seen! Oh, and by the way, I've heard tales that the Commodore be lookin' fer ye... Keep a sharp eye!
Truly Yours,
Lassy G

Dear Lassy G,
Yer offer is very tempting, but I'm goin' to be headin' out of the area very soon on an adventure, mostly to get away from Norrington. I'll look ye up when I come back!
Captain Jack Sparrow

Hey, Jack!
I just wanted to say hi! to you. Um...what have you been up to lately? Where's your "father?"
The Unknown Pirate

Dear Unknown,
I haven't been up to much except answering these letters to pirates like you! I don't discuss my relatives with stranges, sorry!
Captain Jack Sparrow

Dear Jack,
It be Christy here, Mitzy's had the baby, it's a baby girl. She has decided to name her Solange. She's tried to talk to the father, but well, he doesn't want nothing to do with her. Poor thing, growing up without her father. Me and Mitzy know how hard that can be. Mitzy will kill me if she see's me writing this, but I had a thought could you, err... being our dad and all, could you change his mind...a little. Or talk to him at least. He goes by the name of James Jacobs. He lives near Port Royal. Elizabeth and Will are helping take care of the baby, me and Mitz. Will and the missing baby Elizabeth have been restored to Elizabeth. She explained how she wrote to you for advice. Suddenly she found out the next day that they were both a-knocking on her door. She was so pleased. Can I ask whether you 'ad 'nythin' to do with it?? I don't like that guy down at the docking any more. He's seeing someone else and it turns out he's a scumbag (excuse the language). Hope to see ya soon. Please talk to James. Mitzy is terribly upset about him. Raising a child all by herself at the age of 15. Well I'd better go, she's coming now. See ya soon. Write back.
Love,
Christy (and Mitzy if she knew i was writing)
xxxxxxx

Dear Christy,
Congratulations to Mitzy. If I run across this Mr. Jacobs fella, I'll have a word with him. But it's been my experience that men who "love 'em and leave 'em" aren't worth havin' around anyway. Especially to raise a family. Best she find another young man to help. I hope she learns from this experience. Aye, I helped get the baby Elizabeth back. Modesty prevents me from giving the details, but suffice it to say I had to use my superior cunning, sword skills, and excellent crew to accomplish the feat!
Captain Jack Sparrow

Dear Cap'n Jack Sparrow,
Ever since I was a young 'un, I've dreamed of turnin' pirate, even though I know tis bad luck to have a woman aboard. But I love the ocean and will sail across it even if I ain't a pirate. I can't wait to 'ear more of yer riviting sea tales. So how's yer life at sea been goin, eh? Write back if yer will.
Yer Fellow Sailor,
First Mate Geedunk Pegs

Dear Pegs,
Bein' a pirate is an adventure, if yer up to it. As for me, lately I've had it pretty easy, relaxin' and just keepin' a sharp eye out for Norrington. I'm itchin' for adventure again, tho, so I may pull anchor and be off to new waters. I'll try to keep up with the mail still, as I enjoy talkin' to me fellow pirates.
Captain Jack Sparrow

Dear Jack,
I thank u so much that u knew my parents, but I am sorry that u don't know their past. If ye have anything that belongs to them still on the Pearl, could ya send it to me? I'm currently in Tortuga in the "Faithly Bride". I hear it is yur favorite bar. I can tell ya that I did sink the ship that Norrington was on. It was funny, seeing that Norrington couldn't swim fast. I have kept the picture of u and the Pearl safe. But before I blow Norrington's ship, he said that he was looking for a journal of some sort that is black and has a really faded picture of the Pearl on it. My parents' journal has that on it. Are u sure that u know nothing of this journal? I 'ave. If ya do, plz tell me or Norrington will 'ave no ships left by the time I am finished with 'im!
Luv,
Captain 'bleeding hart' Pearl
P.S. Just tell me if u know anything of the journal

Dear Captain Pearl,
I haven't seen the journal. But remember, there was a strange "captain" and crew on the Black Pearl for many years, and one of them could've destroyed it or taken it. Sorry. Don't worry about Norrington. I'm not too fond of 'im anyway. Have a go at 'is ships!
Captain Jack Sparrow

Dear Jack,
I've found myself in a place similar to dear Will Turner's. There's a pirate I have my good eye on, but I don't know if he fancies me as I do him. What should I do, Captain?
Signed,
First Mate Seeker

Dear Seeker,
Sorry, I can't help you. You must help yourself. I've found a little friendly conversation with a lass lets me know if she fancies me. Talk to him. That's all.
Captain Jack Sparrow

Jack,
It's Will. How have you been doing lately? Elizabeth (the big one) has gone missing! Norrington has looked all around town and hasn't found her. Anyway, she is missing. I was hoping you could try to find her. I have decided that I will make a replica of the medallion (just because she loved wearing it) for Elizabeth. My concerns for you are deep. Another man by the name of Cutthroat Clark is trying to be you! He even looks like you! I'm letting you know before he gets to you. You should visit. Your kids are waiting.
Your friend,
Will

Dear Will,
It's great to hear from you, mate. I still think you should've turned pirate. But I know Elizabeth wouldn't have let you turn that disrespectful. Sorry she's missing. Do you think she ran home to her daddy? Maybe she's turned pirate herself (she has the spirit for it!). I'll keep an eye and ear open for her. If Cutthroat Clark is trying to be me, he needs to change his name, too. Amateurs. Remind my kids that a pirate's life is extremely unpredictable. I can't just sail into port at a moment's notice. Unless we're low on rum...
Captain Jack Sparrow

Dear Jack,
I know you ain't seen the journal, but Norrington made it clear that it is on your ship somewhere. I know about the strange captian on that ship, but Norrington wouldn't of said it if it ain't true. And Norrington made sure that I heard it. Did he know my parents, too? And Norrington didn't lie, but I need ta know. And I will 'ave a go at 'is ships, it is fun.
Luv,
Captain 'Bleeding Hart' Pearl

Dear Captain Pearl,
I'll have my crew hunt from stem to stern for that journal if that'll make you happy. I wouldn't trust Norrington. He doesn't have any respect for pirates. Enjoy attackin' his ships.
Captain Jack Sparrow

Dear Jack,
Me mate, Val, is a complete pain. She breaks me stuff and she whines when she does not get her way. Sometimes I feel like I am just going to explode. She is always going into me cabin and she always wants to mess with me junk. What should I do? By the way, what does it take to be a pirate?
Signed,
Calico Cat, The Scourge of the Seven Seas

Dear Calico,
That doesn't sound like a mate, lad, it sounds like a headache. I suggest you offload her at the next convenient port. As to the second question, you probably alread have what it takes to be a pirate (like a good name), all you need to develop is a reputation. Some sword-fighting skills wouldn't hurt, either.
Captain Jack Sparrow

Jack,
M'name's Bloody Rose Sparrow, least that is what I was called by since I can remember. You are my father. I don't know who my mother is...they told me she died shorty after I was born. I was brought up in Tortuga where I learned to fight. I disguised myself as a young lad and went aboard a ship, but soon after we left port, they found out I was not who they thought I was. They threw me overboard, hoping I would die. Well, if you cannot tell, I did not. I swam back to Tortuga and got a job at the tavern. I have grown up hearing tales of you and fighting to be like you...well, I am feared by most and though I am only a lass of 13 and a half, I am as good with a blade as they say you are. I wish to meet you and, if posable, come aboard you ship, for no one will come aboard mine...they are too frightened. Well, I wish to hear from you. AND IF THAT SHAM OF A PIRATE BARBOSSA'S DAUGHTER SAYS ONE MORE THING I SWEAR I WILL SEE TO IT THAT SHE IS AT THE BOTTOM OF THE OCEAN!
Much love daddy dearest,
Bloody Rose Sparrow

Dear Bloody Rose,
Wow, what a story! I hate to say it, but I have enough children as it is. I can't take on any more. Thanks for the support regarding Barbossa's daughter, but I'm afraid I can't meet you, except in battle. Good luck in your pirating ventures.
Captain Jack Sparrow

Dear Captain Jack Sparrow,
I be a lass of 15, and I have a dream to sail the seven seas with you. Would you accept?
Captian Iron Heart
P.S. I have me eye on you.

Dear Captain Iron Heart,
Sorry, lass, I'm old enough to be your father....uh, wait a minute, you're not another one of my children, are you? And I'm not taking on any new crew right now.
Captain Jack Sparrow

Dear Captain Jack Sparrow,
Thanks for the earlier advice. My ship avoided scurvy while all others went down with it! My reputation is proceeding before me. Much like yours does. Once I told the truth of my life to my crew they spread it through taverns and now I'm one of the feared pirates on my side of the ocean. I am 28 days from my 15th birthday and I'm one of the best where I live, but I doubt I'll ever be greater then you. No one will. And I noticed you are confused with my age group. Lemme sum up: The "13-14-15" year olds are the ones who have heard the tales of you and think you are the greatest, most sexiest pirate alive EVER. As do I. (Excuse the language, but I don't think you mind). We all dream about being in your arms or being kissed by you. We don't care how old you are. I think that sums it up for ya. By the way, my crew has memorized "Yo Ho Yo Ho A Pirate's Life For Me". Well, thanks for the advice and I hope MY advice helps ya out! Good Luck with your rum! Hope no one burns it! (My blood boils against anyone who tries to). I wish your ship the best winds!
Captain Oceana "Bloody Rose" Morgan
P.S. Do you really have that many children?! I think some are lying!
P.S.S. Thanks for not being tied to anyone. It gives us girls a hobby!
P.S.S.S Have you heard my reputation yet?

Dear Captain "Bloody Rose" Morgan,
Glad you made it through your scurvy. I learned about that on my travels through the Indian Ocean a few years back. Thanks for explaining the age issue. I'll keep that in mind. I suppose I should be honored. Glad to hear you know my favorite song. Share it with other crews, I think they'll like it, too! As to the children, I really don't know what to think. I think perhaps they've heard I found a treasure, and are trying to cash in. Maybe I'll create a pirate's foundation or something with the excess cash, then everyone can benefit. I'll give it some thought. I have heard some rumors of you, but I've been staying away from port a lot lately, so I'm probably not the best one to ask. Give it some time, it'll happen.
Captain Jack Sparrow

NO ONE SPEAKS TO ME LIKE THAT! I have prided myself as one of your children all my young life, but now that I see what kind of a scroundrel you are, I have nothing aginst Barbossa's daughter blowing your head off! I'll help her! I've found me a crew and we all hate you...I might have taken pity on ye before, but no longer! If I meet you I will fight you to the death. I have no problem killin'...even if it means killin' me own father...the only man I ever looked up to. You best be sayin' your prayers now, mate...there ain't gonna be time once we meet...and I shall tell Norrington everthing I know about you...down to your last weakness...
Ta...
Bloody Rose
P.S. I DISOWN THE NAME "SPARROW"!!

Dear Bloody Rose,
I think you've been in the rum too often lately. Either you like me, or you don't. Or else this "Bloody Rose" is an imposter. Either way, I wish you'd sort yourself out. I think I need a swig 'o rum!
Captain Jack Sparrow

Dear Jack,
Let me say thank you for makin' yer crew search from stem to stern for my parents' journal. I would ne'er trust Norrington, he just makes me worry too much, but then again, who wouldn't? So far I have blown up half of the navy ship and have Norrington in my brig. I love the life of a pirate, it's so much fun!
Luv,
Captian 'Bleedin' Hart' Pearl
P.S. I thank ye from the bottom of me hart!

Dear Captain Pearl,
Glad you're enjoyin' yerself, mate! Please don't hurt Norrington, it would take the fun out of my life. Without him, I don't have a good excuse to be in hiding. And right now I need to lay low for many reasons (see previous letters).
Captain Jack Sparrow

Ahoy there, Jack,
You are the most gorgeous pirate of the Caribbean, mate. I love ya with all me heart. I'm even talkin' an' dressin' like ya. Me younger cousins Ashley and Kayla love ya, too. I would like to invite you to my sweet sixteen party. Say, is it still sweet sixteen for us pirates? Hope to hear from ya soon.
All my love,
Jack Lover

Dear J.L.,
Hmmm...you're female and 15...enough said. I hope 16 will be sweeter for you!
Captain Jack Sparrow

(Your letter goes here! So send it in, you scabrous dog!)

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