OUR SMALL CIRCLE OF SISTERHOOD

by Nona Passalacqua, C.C.H.T

The 5 of us women work in a fairly small office for a single male business owner. These days it is a good place to work even though financially times are hard. We have had discussions of reduction of hours and holding on to paychecks for a few days to allow the funds to hit the bank account. It can get pretty tense when rent is due. But for all this potential stress, we are doing fine. There is an attitude of solidarity and mutual respect which I personally have never seen manifest to this degree in a business environment.

I have worked in this office part time for the last 18 months. When I first came to work here interpersonal tensions were high. There was an undercurrent of disgruntled blame and suspicion. Mutual respect was non-existent. The owner was distracted and frustrated. Over time most of the staff left and were replaced by others. And then about 9 months ago something shifted. We endured a sudden reduction in staff and those of us left found we could support each other. Then two other women came on board. We began to have regular meetings and to develop marketing strategies together as a group. Then we began to add meditation to our meetings. About this time, the owner was going through a time of personal hardship. He was distracted again but open to us coming together to empower each other (and coincidentally empower him). We became a sisterhood, watching out for each other and working hard together. We can get annoyed with each other under stress, but there isn't really any grandstanding or blaming. We are learning to take responsibility for our mistakes without having to defend against harsh judgment from the others. And we are discovering that we each have unique talents that can contribute to the whole. We're finding that we don't have to compete to gain recognition. What a surprise!

To say that this is an unusual circumstance is an understatement. Even as I write about it I realize it sounds idealistic, almost unreal. But it is real. It is happening. And it is simple. It makes me wonder why there is so little of this in our business world. It isn't that none of us care about our finances. We would all dearly love to become more successful. We would love to have bonuses and/or company trips together. The owner is open to this possibility. But we may never get there. There are no guarantees. The vision of these percs is not the driving factor in our willingness to work together. The driving factor is the knowing that we can, as women, bring spiritual and human values into the workplace and make it work. That is our empowerment of each other and ourselves.

It is strange to have this work situation existing in a time where the bottom line is so increasingly power and money that 60-hour workweeks are commonplace and layoffs and firings are epidemic. It makes me wonder about the nature of our perceptions of reality. Why have hard times united rather than divided us? Are we just a unique combination of personalities? Is the fact of being open to meditating together before our meetings responsible for all that is going on? Are we a fluke? Or are the majority of people capable and willing to give each other a break and come together when the concept is allowed and encouraged? What has made our business owner open to this possibility? He says he has always wanted this environment around him. Was it the personal traumas in his own life that gave him the willingness to open to it actually happening?

We're a tiny group: 5 women and 1 man. I don't know if we will continue to behave in this manner. It certainly isn't the norm. On the other hand, I don't know why we wouldn't. Does our experience make a difference? I hope so. I would like to think that the risk we have taken to trust each other would encourage others to do the same. A small change, a big hope.

Nona Passalacqua, C.C.H.T., Santa Rosa, CA 707-578-9290

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