Why I will not get out of bed....
by A.F. Firebird

September 11th 4pm a conversation takes place in Jamie's room.

Why I will not get out of bed? I can't believe you just asked me that? What part of what I have just been telling you did you miss? Which bit didn't you get? Isn't it obvious why I won't get out of bed?

I just told you I am the Goddess of bedding. Where do you suppose the Goddess of bedding would spend her time? That's right in bed.

What does a bedding Goddess do? Well you know that feeling you get when you slip into freshly laundered sheets, or cozy up on a cold day under a fluffy duvet? That's me, that is. Have you ever noticed the way blankets and duvets fold round you like a mother's arms holding you safe and warm, lovingly watching over you as you sleep? That's me, again. And have you ever noticed the sweet lullaby your bed sings to you as you wrestle for sleep? No, well not many do but that's me too.

Now Jamie, let's talk about why you won't get out of bed. I see some mad man orchestrated four suicide pilots to fly into heavily populated buildings and now your light has gone out. It was snuffed out by fear and grief and now you just can't go on, knowing there is so much darkness in the world. Well, let me see what I can do for you. I can wrap you up safe and warm for a while so that you can sleep, heal and remember that you are always safe. Yes, that is what I will do for you, and little by little you will regain your strength.

Can I hurt him? Well, yes actually I can. I can sprinkle his sheets with inexplicable crumbs so that every night he wakes with the tiny grains grinding into delicate flesh. Instead of a lullaby I can sing to him words of hate. I can whisper, this is for the Mother of two on the 106th floor, you fucker, as I arrange the pillows to crick his neck. Night after night, after night for all time I can make sure he never rests for lumpy sheets. Small comforts to lose you may say but the kind of things sorely missed when they are gone, and soon the need for sleep becomes all consuming.

Yet I can do something better than that. Yes, torturing him with sleepless nights, aching muscles and sores would be gratifying for a long time, but would it give anyone peace? No it would not. So what I will do is rock him to sleep with a song of peace. I will remind him of the safety of Mother love, I will soothe him to sleep, so that he can heal the hate in his heart. So he can remember he is one with you and everyone else, until he knows that by hurting you he is hurting himself. I know who he is now and I he will not be able to resist me. Even if he can resist me, small deity that I am, just think what my elder brothers, and sisters can do. He WILL be healed.

This is what we can do and will do. Now pull up your sheets, and snuggle into my arms and let me rock you my love, my sweet child, my mighty ray of sunshine, tomorrow it will be time to get out of bed and shine again.

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